In, Out... Stay.
Title: In, Out... Stay.
Pairing: Onkey
Genre: Angst, Fluff
Rating: PG-13
Length: 1,185 words
Warning: Contains swear words, Unbetaed
Summary: What's the good of being the jack of all trades, but master of none? He is destroying himself, but he is not needed anyways.
He inhaled, and exhaled through a satisfied sigh with his head tilted back, looking up at the blue sky through a trail of smoke. The endless clear sky so wide it almost looked empty and hollow, burning sunlight reaching down for a desperate grasp of everything and anything.
“I didn’t know you smoke.”
Fuck. Key turned around from his spot on the rooftop and found Minho by the stairs.
“You know now.” Key turned back to the sky with the thin stick in his hand.
“Why?” Minho moved to stand beside Key, gazing up at the sky as well to try to see what his band mate is seeing. Blue.
“Why not?”
“Because that thing in your hand kills your lungs.”
Key blinked. And inhaled. “You cover most of the raps we get, and I am not a competitive sport freak like you, so it doesn’t matter.” Exhale.
“Key, you don’t do sports.”
“Exactly.”
Minho sighs just as Key inhale again and turned to leave with a hint of tobacco smell clinging on his clothes, not wanting to let go.
~
He released a lung full of smoke and let it swirl into the young evening sky and blend with the fog that is blurring his view of the faraway cityscape into a hazy glow of light, taking in the suffocating silence in the air before the storm.
“Hyung, what are you doing?”
Shit. Key jumped at the intruding but soft voice.
“What do I look like I am doing?” Key asked with a hint of sarcasm, wincing at the sharpness of his own voice slicing through the air.
“I can smell it on Minho hyung’s clothes.” Taemin wrinkled his nose in distaste, not bothered by the other’s tone of voice because that’s just Key. “Why do you do it? It smells yucky.”
Key rolled his eyes, of course Taemin would still use words like yucky even though he is by law an adult now.
“You are the main dancer, so I can do whatever I want to my body.” Key took in a lung full of smoke.
“I still don’t like it.” Taemin pouted, waving his hands around wildly to chase away the smell.
Key leaned in close to Taemin’s face. “You will get used to it Taeminnie,” Pecking the maknae’s cheek with a mischievous smile.
Taemin let out a yelp and pushed Key away when he was greeted with a face full of smoke. Key watched Taemin’s long blonde hair flowing behind him as he run away with hands covering his nose. He missed the old days when the insecure maknae and his virgin black mushroom hair would trail behind him everywhere he went, blinking nervously.
~
He took another drag and watch the light of orange grew brighter for a brief moment at the other end of the cigarette before weakening again in the mist of the rain that is sprinkling down.
“Yo.”
Key just kept on gazing out at the hazy city nightlight with his elbows propped up on the railings, too used to disruptions by now, and there is only one person who speaks like that.
“I will trade you for that bad boy you have there in your hand,” Jonghyun hands Key an umbrella, the sky raining harder by the second. “Taemin asked me to bring you this.”
“Keep it,” Key waved it off with a flick of his hand and a tap of his cigarette. “Tempting offer though.”
“Why?” Jonghyun asked while looking at his best friend under the umbrella he is now holding up above the two of them.
He knows Jonghyun is not asking why he won’t take the umbrella.
In.
Key turned to stare boldly at the one he is so close with, studying every feature he already knew like the back of his hand, from the freshly cut brown locks with highlights at the top, to the thick eyebrows that have as much personality as the owner does, to the large eyes with single eyelids that have a hint of crease on them, to the equally large nose with obnoxious nostrils jonghyun is so conscious of, to the lips that were moisten recently with his tongue, to the distinctive cheekbones and jaw line. They know each other so well they can basically read each other’s thought right here and now. Key broke the eyelock.
And out.
“Do you really want to know?” But Key already knows the answer. And Jonghyun knows he knows, so he answered with silence. “I am not the lead vocalist. I don’t have to protect my voice like you do.”
“Bullshit.”
“Whatever you say,” Key shrugged. “I gave you an answer, but you won’t accept it. What do you want me to do?”
“Come back.”
“Just leave me alone.”
In.
“You don’t want me to.”
And out.
“Leave.”
Jonghyun did just that. He placed the umbrella on Key’s shoulder and left Key by himself with a dot of fiery orange burning at the back of his eyelids. He can feel the rain falling down on him like someone’s tears, the feeling of pain and forlornness that wanted salvation. He embraces it.
In again.
~
He blew a trail of warm, off-white smoke from his lips into the chilly morning air. The world is wrapped in a blanket of calming quietness again after the rain, with the occasional birds chirping and cars going by carrying tired urbanite who have unfortunate jobs which require going to work at an ungodly hour.
The peace Key was enjoying got broken by the sound of a person cursing after bumping the side of the door to the roof.
“Grand entrance as always, Jinki hyung.” Key took another drag of his cigarette.
Jinki quietly stood beside him, staring out at the clearing sky. A ray of sunshine reached out to him and cast a warm glow on his face.
“Are you here to ask me why I smoke like the others?” Key asked as he looked at the leader’s now closed eyes, welcoming the sunshine.
To Key, Jinki is a spiritual person with an aura of serenity that is soothing and comforting, a person who pours love out unconditionally, accepting everything and anything warmly without question. A fool if you ask him.
“Jonghyun was soaked from head to toe last night.” Jinki ignored Key’s question. “I hope he won’t catch a cold.”
“Nah, he will be fine,” Key sneered. “That walking stump of muscle is strong.”
Jinki turned to look at Key in the eyes. “Are you?”
When Key turned away to bring the cigarette up to his mouth, Jinki took a step closer and reached out for the cigarette in between Key’s fingers and lips. Tossing the cigarette on the ground somewhere far away, he replaced it with his own fingers and lips.
“I need you Kibum,” Jinki breathed out after he pulled away from their kiss, but lingering close enough that their nose still touch and fingers still intertwine together. “We need you. Stay.”
Key feels the overwhelmingly warm sense of belonging spreading from his core to every single last cell of his body. What a fool.
~
A/N 1: Tons and lots and loads of imagery (and run on sentences... oops) in this piece of work.
A/N 2: Key and cigarettes just goes together so nicely. I am usually not a fan of smokers, but I have a feeling Key can turn that into something really hot (not that I want him to smoke, because as hot as it would look, I still don't want Key to kill his lungs).
A/N 3: Even though I characterized Key here into a person who felt as though he is not good at anything here in this fic, we all know that in reality, he is a person who is good at everything. Life is not fair really.
A/N 4: I know it is impossible for Key to stand at the rooftop all day and night, and for the weather to change that rapidly throughout the spand of one day, but hey, this is fiction (gotta love excuses like these)~