Zaki and Catherine...fics?
Just here to share some gen/crack I'd written for Catherine and Zaki a long, long, long time ago.
So here they are: three tiny, shorty-short, unrelated vignettes. ...uh...I think the second and third ones are somewhat related. Warning for obscure sense of humor, Sadaharu poop, etc etc.
1.
Before she met Otose, her life had no direction.
[an empty flower basket--by the wind it was blown every which way]
Even now, as she forces her way into the Yorozuya's apartment, and demands that they 'better pay up this month's rent, or else', she still has no idea where she's going.
But it's alright, she thinks, it's alright as long as she's able to be of some use to that magnanimous old lady, occasionally steal her cigarettes, and give those rent-evading freaks a run for their money...or lack thereof.
[until it found a flower bed and a vendor who sold cheap sake]
2.
Catherine hates Sadaharu for two reasons. One: he bites/eats anything and anyone without preamble. She’s lived alongside the Yorozuya long enough to understand that when the big, amanto dog chews on peoples heads, he’s actually trying to say “I like you…r blood in my mouth.” But even so, the amount of blood that leaks down her skull when he chews on her head is significantly greater than the amount that leaks out for others.
The second reason is pretty self-explanatory: he poops a lot. At first, she thinks Sadaharu has a time-schedule and a designated area to do his business, but soon she realizes that he doesn’t really need a schedule or a location if he poops all the time and everywhere. In the morning, he lays a mound the size of a basketball at the storefront. A little after lunch, he excretes another pile by the electric pole behind the snack house. And by midnight, he somehow manages to deliver a few more fecal mounds tied up in plastic bags, all spread out around the dumpster like offerings at a shrine.
It doesn’t take long for Catherine to realize that Sadaharu hauling his big ass into that narrow alleyway and packing his excrement in plastic bags of all things is a very unlikely scenario. But on the other hand, a good-for-nothing nose-picker like Sakata-san flinging the plastic bags out the window with a nonchalant flick of his wrist is a very likely scenario.
Hurling the bags back up the Yorozuya’s window would only result in more work for her so every night, she implements the same backup plan.
“Oooi Tamaaa, come ‘ere and make yourself useful.”
2.5
“Stop throwing Sadaharu’s shit out the window, ya damn bastards!” Catherine snaps one day, hurling a rock up at the Yorozuya's front door.
Gintoki and Kagura come out, pinkies up their noses as usual.
Catherine is not surprised when they lean over the railing, and send a few high power spitballs her way. As she dodges the onslaught, she realizes that asking those no-good bastards to change their ways was like finding a 1000 yen bill on the road and handing it over to the police. Ain’t happening.
Aaaand, I've also got some Zaki/'Minton one-sentence prompt stuff too. It's the continuation of this piece of crack.
Midnight
In his determination to hunt down the thief who stole his precious shuttlecocks, Yamazaki ventures out at midnight and discovers Okita in the middle of one of his infamous rituals; he watches in horror as the Captain uses a feather, most likely plucked out of HIS shuttlecock, and rubs it back and forth over the torso of a voodoo doll--Yamazaki could SWEAR he heard Hijikata laughing hysterically a few doors down.
Music
The sound of a shuttlecock hitting the opponent's mid-court [that quick, resounding smack] uplifts his spirit in way that even Tenipuri's opening song doesn't.
Overwhelmed
"Wha-what are you...doing?" Yamazaki asks, looking as if he was about to pass out; "Ah, my cellphone fell in the toilet..." Kamiyama replies, "and I couldn't find anything to get it out with...and your racquet was right there so..."
Promise
He makes a promise to himself that the next time he has to deal with Kawakami Bansai, he'll definitely bring his badminton gear along--what better way to settle a Manly-Man fight other than having a 'Minton Match Off?
World
"It's freaks like these that make me want to annihilate this world a little more than I actually do," Takasugi says, as he and his Kihetai minions are forced to wait in line at the thrift store just because some Jimi and his loser friends were "dissatisfied about the tear in the badminton net they bought that morning and were NOT going to move unless they got a replacement".
--
In the first Catherine vignette, the stuff in the brackets was a poor excuse for a rhyming couplet. Lol, I PHAILED BIG TIME but meh, it's fine as long as I managed to convey the meaning.
WORD OF THE DAY: Contumacious = "stubbornly rebellious or disobedient." So now that you've learned a new word, this post couldn't have been a total waste of time, right? :D
So here they are: three tiny, shorty-short, unrelated vignettes. ...uh...I think the second and third ones are somewhat related. Warning for obscure sense of humor, Sadaharu poop, etc etc.
1.
Before she met Otose, her life had no direction.
[an empty flower basket--by the wind it was blown every which way]
Even now, as she forces her way into the Yorozuya's apartment, and demands that they 'better pay up this month's rent, or else', she still has no idea where she's going.
But it's alright, she thinks, it's alright as long as she's able to be of some use to that magnanimous old lady, occasionally steal her cigarettes, and give those rent-evading freaks a run for their money...or lack thereof.
[until it found a flower bed and a vendor who sold cheap sake]
2.
Catherine hates Sadaharu for two reasons. One: he bites/eats anything and anyone without preamble. She’s lived alongside the Yorozuya long enough to understand that when the big, amanto dog chews on peoples heads, he’s actually trying to say “I like you…r blood in my mouth.” But even so, the amount of blood that leaks down her skull when he chews on her head is significantly greater than the amount that leaks out for others.
The second reason is pretty self-explanatory: he poops a lot. At first, she thinks Sadaharu has a time-schedule and a designated area to do his business, but soon she realizes that he doesn’t really need a schedule or a location if he poops all the time and everywhere. In the morning, he lays a mound the size of a basketball at the storefront. A little after lunch, he excretes another pile by the electric pole behind the snack house. And by midnight, he somehow manages to deliver a few more fecal mounds tied up in plastic bags, all spread out around the dumpster like offerings at a shrine.
It doesn’t take long for Catherine to realize that Sadaharu hauling his big ass into that narrow alleyway and packing his excrement in plastic bags of all things is a very unlikely scenario. But on the other hand, a good-for-nothing nose-picker like Sakata-san flinging the plastic bags out the window with a nonchalant flick of his wrist is a very likely scenario.
Hurling the bags back up the Yorozuya’s window would only result in more work for her so every night, she implements the same backup plan.
“Oooi Tamaaa, come ‘ere and make yourself useful.”
2.5
“Stop throwing Sadaharu’s shit out the window, ya damn bastards!” Catherine snaps one day, hurling a rock up at the Yorozuya's front door.
Gintoki and Kagura come out, pinkies up their noses as usual.
Catherine is not surprised when they lean over the railing, and send a few high power spitballs her way. As she dodges the onslaught, she realizes that asking those no-good bastards to change their ways was like finding a 1000 yen bill on the road and handing it over to the police. Ain’t happening.
Aaaand, I've also got some Zaki/'Minton one-sentence prompt stuff too. It's the continuation of this piece of crack.
Midnight
In his determination to hunt down the thief who stole his precious shuttlecocks, Yamazaki ventures out at midnight and discovers Okita in the middle of one of his infamous rituals; he watches in horror as the Captain uses a feather, most likely plucked out of HIS shuttlecock, and rubs it back and forth over the torso of a voodoo doll--Yamazaki could SWEAR he heard Hijikata laughing hysterically a few doors down.
Music
The sound of a shuttlecock hitting the opponent's mid-court [that quick, resounding smack] uplifts his spirit in way that even Tenipuri's opening song doesn't.
Overwhelmed
"Wha-what are you...doing?" Yamazaki asks, looking as if he was about to pass out; "Ah, my cellphone fell in the toilet..." Kamiyama replies, "and I couldn't find anything to get it out with...and your racquet was right there so..."
Promise
He makes a promise to himself that the next time he has to deal with Kawakami Bansai, he'll definitely bring his badminton gear along--what better way to settle a Manly-Man fight other than having a 'Minton Match Off?
World
"It's freaks like these that make me want to annihilate this world a little more than I actually do," Takasugi says, as he and his Kihetai minions are forced to wait in line at the thrift store just because some Jimi and his loser friends were "dissatisfied about the tear in the badminton net they bought that morning and were NOT going to move unless they got a replacement".
--
In the first Catherine vignette, the stuff in the brackets was a poor excuse for a rhyming couplet. Lol, I PHAILED BIG TIME but meh, it's fine as long as I managed to convey the meaning.
WORD OF THE DAY: Contumacious = "stubbornly rebellious or disobedient." So now that you've learned a new word, this post couldn't have been a total waste of time, right? :D