this is a test, this is only a test

right before you get to thinking about things in a new way you are surrounded with terrible confusion, maybe even sadness, for a few days. so if ive seemed that way its because ive beent thinking, and im not done for now but i feel like its ok to live life joyfully and with simple awe again, but in a new context. its all very exciting.

quick recap,boap had a show a week ago, sarah visited till friday, sunday she asked me to come over...so i did then i came home today. amid all that i got to hang out with dave, lisa, and kristin and say farewell before college, which was great. and now im hangen out and resting up for the night.

this week i was wondering what getting fucked in the ass felt like...until today when i found out exactly how manhattan college likes to do it.

im either very tired or just bummed out, either way bleh

i clean a lot now-a-days and am subsequently burnt out because of it.

i cleaned my house today...just me, and water, and bleach, and i hate it, very much...its now 10:30 and im sure im spending the rest of the night in unless by some very strange twist of fate something happends. as it stands, this is the most pathetic day of my life. what a waste of a day.p

im home.. except not at all. and more than anything i just want to be back where ive built a new life.

maybe i really don't know anything

Last night/this morning i got to my room at 5:47 am. this is something about college which i do not mind. Also a jazz/blues jam just occured in my room so im really happy as a result of that. ok thats it.