(Untitled)

[stilljustandrew]

[After this.]

*It's not too dark out here -- there's a moon just a few days before the full, and the strange stars.*

*Andrew's nose wrinkles a little: the sulfur smell of the demon seems to be clinging to their clothes, and it's more apparent out here in the clearer air.*

You sure you're okay?

Comments

[hadyougoing]

"I couldn't have," Ava says, not sounding as if she's actually listening to him. "Because-- I know what's going on now, I'm trying not to get-- angry, or frustrated, and find my zen or follow my happy place or whatever--"

She breaks off, shooting Andrew a look that is both anguished and angry.

"I'm at the end of the freaking universe! This isn't supposed to be happening anymore! Andrew, what the hell is wrong with me?"

[stilljustandrew]

-- hey. Hey.

*He's sitting up straighter, and then leaning forward, one hand going out to her.*

It's okay, Ava, it's okay, just --

[hadyougoing]

She shakes her head fiercely, though the fierceness is a little sheepish-- oh God don't look at me crying.

"I didn't-- say anything because I didn't want it to be true, I didn't want it to be me again--

"But it was me. Wasn't it."

[stilljustandrew]

*Pause.*

I don't know.

Seriously, I don't know, but -- Ava, if you're not doing this on purpose, it's not your fault.

[hadyougoing]

Ava takes a deep breath, swallowing a sniffle.

By her silence, she may or may not agree with him.

"What am I going to do?" she asks eventually. "I can't stay here if I'm gonna be a freaking demon magnet. I feel like they have a very definite policy about monsters running around trying to kill everybody."

[stilljustandrew]

*He's rummaging in his pocket, and manages to extricate a somewhat crumpled packet of tissues with a few left inside, which he offers her.*

Are you sure it's you doing it? Not someone else sending them after you?

[hadyougoing]

Ava gives him a weird look, though it softens when she sees the tissues into something more akin to will not cry, will not cry.

"I don't get why anybody would want to do that ... uh, unless it has to do with whatever Sam was talking about." She dabs hastily at one eye. "But shouldn't the yellow-eyed guy be telling me to burn things and not chasing me with demons?"

[stilljustandrew]

Telling you to burn things?

*He frowns, puzzled.*

[hadyougoing]

"I mean, not that specifically," Ava mumbles. She sniffs. "Did I tell you this part?"

[stilljustandrew]

I don't think so.

*Beat.*

You don't have to, if it's ... if you don't ...

[hadyougoing]

"No, it's not a big deal," she says hastily. "I mean-- I don't know."

She shrugs, looking down at the water.

"Uh, so the way I figured out my dreams might be because of this ... demon guy ... with the yellow eyes ... was because of Sam saying we were all a part of something? But also because there was this tape we found, this recording of a guy who was in therapy, and he said that there was a yellow-eyed man he dreamed about who was telling him to do things. I don't know what kinds of things-- he said 'bad.' So I was mostly just making a stupid joke, which now that I think about it wasn't that funny, but, um. Yeah."

[stilljustandrew]

*Andrew draws up one knee, folds his hands around his lower leg. The movement almost, but not quite, disguises a shudder.*

Well.

That's a reason right there he might be sending the little demons after you. To make you think you're doing it.

[hadyougoing]

"But wouldn't that mean he's here?"

Ava glances apprehensively over her shoulder before turning back to Andrew.

[stilljustandrew]

Could be, yeah.

*There's a trickle of unease that he doesn't want to put a name to yet. It doesn't show in his voice or his face, though; all that's there is a matter-of-fact flatness.*

And if he's trying to convince you to do bad things, then that's one tactic he might be using. Getting you to believe that you're already doing them.

And that once you've started doing things like that for him, he owns you.

*In his memory, the false Jonathan's voice: I made you do this.*

[hadyougoing]

Ava's eyes widen. She looks more than apprehensive now; she looks frightened.

"I--"

She purses her lips, shaking her head slowly, and clutches at another tissue.

"I just think it might be too late."

She holds up her hands. "I mean-- um. Okay, so I said I was ... trying not to get mad? Ever? And maybe, maybe this guy really is sending demons around trying to make me think I'm doing these things. But, Andrew, what if it is me? What if this is ... me?"

[stilljustandrew]

It doesn't have to be.

*It's unhesitating, and with the certainty of absolute conviction. He's turned completely to face her now, sitting straighter, looking her right in the face.*

If it is you doing this, and you want to stop, you can find a way.