(no subject)
Journal journal journal.
The Fair, to sum it all up, was fun. I rode the zipper a bazillion times. Cassie and Josie aren't the same anymore. They are starting to be trendy, and not dorky, and the thing I loved about them was how they could be so dorky and still melt the hearts of everyone around them.
I miss them living in the Keys, alot. I miss it there so much. I just miss walking around at night when the air was so thick you could cut it with a butter knife and the moon was the only light. I felt so happy. I remember thinking "Yeah, I have my problems, but how can life be bad when the world is so beautiful?"
I don't know. I don't know! I like those moments where it's just like "I don't care about my problems, as long as everyone else can be happy. I don't need to be happy, they deserve it so much more than me."
It's not even that I'm not happy. I just want TO SNUGGLE. For God's sake is that so much to ask?! I just want someone to hold my hand. Or let me lay on their shoulder.
Ugh. UGH. What is wrong with me. I feel all icky and lonely.
AND. My Dad bought me some chocolates (Did I mention I love my Dad?). And since my Mom bought herself a Valentine present, he wrote her a poem. And let me read it. And it was so sweet and made me want to cry, but I tried really hard not to because I didn't want my Dad to call me a baby. But now that I think about it I'm gonna cry. Cause they have been together for so long, and he still writes her poems, and she still thinks he is the most handsome man in the world. And I don't know if I'll ever have that. I really don't.
This guy Cassie knows painted her the most beautiful picture I've ever seen of dolphins, because she likes dolphins. Some other guy at the fair bought her a necklace and ran off.
Ugh. I know, I am such a girl. I just want someone that will never get tired of walking outside, and doesn't mind the rain, and will always surprise me. I want a tickle fight... I really do.
Ok, here what I really want to say. IT's NOT FAIR. EVERYONE HAS SOMEONE, OR PRACTICALLY HAS SOMEONE, AND I DON'T. AND IT'S NOT FAIR. I AM SO JEALOUS. AND I CAN ONLY BLAME MYSELF, BECAUSE I AM JUST ONE OF THOSE STUPID PEOPLE WHO BLAMES THEMSELVES FOR THESE THINGS. PLEASE GOD, STRIKE ME DOWN.
Ok, sorry this post is so queer and covered in romantic lovesick goo.
Valentine's day, yech.
The Fair, to sum it all up, was fun. I rode the zipper a bazillion times. Cassie and Josie aren't the same anymore. They are starting to be trendy, and not dorky, and the thing I loved about them was how they could be so dorky and still melt the hearts of everyone around them.
I miss them living in the Keys, alot. I miss it there so much. I just miss walking around at night when the air was so thick you could cut it with a butter knife and the moon was the only light. I felt so happy. I remember thinking "Yeah, I have my problems, but how can life be bad when the world is so beautiful?"
I don't know. I don't know! I like those moments where it's just like "I don't care about my problems, as long as everyone else can be happy. I don't need to be happy, they deserve it so much more than me."
It's not even that I'm not happy. I just want TO SNUGGLE. For God's sake is that so much to ask?! I just want someone to hold my hand. Or let me lay on their shoulder.
Ugh. UGH. What is wrong with me. I feel all icky and lonely.
AND. My Dad bought me some chocolates (Did I mention I love my Dad?). And since my Mom bought herself a Valentine present, he wrote her a poem. And let me read it. And it was so sweet and made me want to cry, but I tried really hard not to because I didn't want my Dad to call me a baby. But now that I think about it I'm gonna cry. Cause they have been together for so long, and he still writes her poems, and she still thinks he is the most handsome man in the world. And I don't know if I'll ever have that. I really don't.
This guy Cassie knows painted her the most beautiful picture I've ever seen of dolphins, because she likes dolphins. Some other guy at the fair bought her a necklace and ran off.
Ugh. I know, I am such a girl. I just want someone that will never get tired of walking outside, and doesn't mind the rain, and will always surprise me. I want a tickle fight... I really do.
Ok, here what I really want to say. IT's NOT FAIR. EVERYONE HAS SOMEONE, OR PRACTICALLY HAS SOMEONE, AND I DON'T. AND IT'S NOT FAIR. I AM SO JEALOUS. AND I CAN ONLY BLAME MYSELF, BECAUSE I AM JUST ONE OF THOSE STUPID PEOPLE WHO BLAMES THEMSELVES FOR THESE THINGS. PLEASE GOD, STRIKE ME DOWN.
Ok, sorry this post is so queer and covered in romantic lovesick goo.
Valentine's day, yech.