Carry on my Wayward Servant Chapter 9
Title: Carry on my Wayward Servant Chapter 9/?
Rating: NC17
Warning/Spoiler: Slashy and some spoiler up to 2X4
Summary: Arthur finds a new punishment for Merlin, and a series of accidents lead them to discover they could be more than master and servant.
Disclaimer: I sadly don't own
Carry on My Wayward Servant
Chapter 9: Attack
“Please Morgana...please tell me.” Merlin pleaded, staring up at the girl as his eyes watered. “He is everything to me,” He said, not bothering to sensor the fact that he was revealing way more than he normally would, and way more than he aught to. “I can't hurt him.”
The lady stared at him for what seemed like ages before giving a heavy sigh. Morgana moved out of the way of the door, and Merlin rushed inside. Rubbing a hand through his hair as he began to pace back and forth throughout the room. “You're staring at me like you want to kill me, and so the way I see it is that whatever you saw had to have been pretty awful, but I wouldn't hurt him!” He pleaded to the girl, who was only giving him a sad look of pity.
“Merlin I know.” She said softly, regret flooding her features. “I'm sorry you had to see me in that state this morning.” She trailed off, sitting at her table. “I had only just had the vision.” She bit her lip. “Dream.” She corrected herself. “I was upset and frantic, and I should have never treated you that way.”
He sank to the floor, his legs giving out underneath of him as he placed his palms over his eyes, rubbing furiously. “I don't blame you for anything you said Milady, I just need to know why you said them.”
“Your eyes...I'll never forget your eyes.” His hands fell away from his face, meeting Morgana's pale one as her gaze was far away. “They were glowing a fierce gold as you came to him, and he...” She swallowed roughly, turning harsh seawater eyes to Merlin. “Arthur kissed you as if you were the thing most precious to him in the world.” There was a harsh accusation accompanied with that revelation, and Merlin's face shot away in shame.
“Arthur would never kiss me.” He lied, the conviction dying in his throat.
“He was naked when I got there this morning, and you were attending to him far earlier than any servant normally would be.” He gave a humorless laugh...Arthur was right, Morgana really was perceptive. “Don't worry he defended your virtue. It would seem you have Arthur Pendragon completely smitten.” It was her turn to laugh. “Arthur has sworn off talking to me forever at my insult to your honor.”
Merlin felt as if he had just swallowed glass, and he had honestly never been so afraid as he had been this moment sitting in front of Morgana. “I don't know what to say.” And he didn't. His tongue felt too big for his mouth, swollen with apprehension and fear.
“Say you'll leave Camelot.” The words were like four consecutive knives being stabbed into his gut, and then the Lady Morgana just kept twisting the blades. “I like you Merlin. I think you are a true and noble friend, and I hate having to speak to you this way, but I also know that my visions hold a note of truth to them. So believe me when I say that although I hate having to hurt you like this, I would hate even more to see you plunge a dagger into Arthur's chest and rip out his heart.”
“You're not talking figuratively, are you?” Merlin asked, heart pounding loud enough in his ears that he was sure he would go deaf. He was only thankful his legs had collapsed earlier, because there was no way at this moment he could stand.
“No. It's what I saw, and he let you do it!” She continued, voice thick with disgust. “I didn't tell him about the eyes Merlin. But if you don't leave Camelot I will...I'll tell Arthur that he is sleeping with a sorcerer.”
He could just imagine Arthur's face when Morgana told him. He knew Arthur well enough by now to envision the look of betrayed disgust that would befall his face before he called the guards and had him imprisoned. ...The fact that he had lived with him so long, shared his bed, well...he would most certainly be burnt for this. A hangman's ax was far too generous for his level of betrayal. When Merlin looked up again, warm tears were flowing freely down his face.
“Please don't tell him. I don't think I would hurt him, but I would never risk his life.” He shut his eyes as the tears continued to fall. “I'll leave if it'll protect him, and I'm sorry that you're looking at me like that right now.” His eyes were a brilliant blue as he got shakily to his feet, walking to Morgana and taking her hand. “I can't help who I am Milady. I know you understand that better than anyone.”
He wasn't prepared for the girl to spring against his chest, wrapping his arms around him. “Merlin I'm so sorry!” When he felt the wetness against his neck he realized Morgana was crying too. “I don't judge you for what you are, and I will never tell anyone.” She stroked his head, and they both stood there wrapped together in a pitiful embrace. “I just get so scared sometimes, and the dreams had been getting better, but this one...” She pulled away, using her hand to wipe at Merlin's tears. “I heard a voice in my head the whole time. It told me this would come to pass. It called you by the name Emrys and said you would betray Camelot, but in doing so you would save them all.”
It felt like every ounce of blood had drained from body until he was just a shell. The words ran over and over in his mind, and he wasn't even aware his feet were moving until his back hit the door. “Please Morgana...just give me until tonight to get away.” He rubbed his eyes over and over, as if by doing so he could somehow clear the last couple of hours away from his mind. “I won't be the cause of any pain here in Camelot, and I will not help that thing.” He bit out hatefully, and Morgana's eyebrows knitted before giving a slight nod.
“I think what you're doing is very brave.” Morgana said softly, her voice sorrowful and guilt ridden. “I know how much he means to you, and that it can't be easy to consider leaving him.” He gave him a tentative smile. “He really doesn't deserve you.” Her attempt at humor fell on deaf ears as he just nodded.
He gave a bow. “I'm sorry to have troubled you Milady,” His voice shook. “Perhaps we can see each other again someday.” He barely got out that last past, turning and stumbling out of the door as he gripped the hallway. He had only made around the corner before he dropped to his knees, sobbing against the cold stone as his forehead pressed into the ground.
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Merlin's fingers were trembling as he finished loading his pack. It contained the precious few belongings he had acquired since coming here. It didn't consist of much, a few clothes, a spell book, and he had carefully wrapped the staff he had gotten from the sidhe. He had planned it out in his mind, over and over again. Arthur had reacted many different ways: he had laughed in his face, he had hit him, and his personal favorite was the prince professing his undying love for him and begging him at his feet not to leave. ...He doubted that one would happen, but it was a nice thought as he considered leaving this life. Ealdor wasn't that bad though. True Will was now gone, but he would be with his mother. He would say good-bye to Arthur, and then he would say good-bye to Gaius and Gwen. His hand trembled as he reached for the door. The last time he had said good-bye to Arthur had been hard, but back then he hadn't been in love with him. Now, now it was going to be damn near impossible.
The first place he stopped was the stables. If any of the three he had to tell had somewhat negative reactions, than at least he would already have his stuff in a safe place. He reached out to the horse, petting its nose as he reached out for a saddle.
“Running away?” The voice made him jump at least ten feet in the air, and he spun around, meeting the curious eyes of Katherine.
“Milady you scared me!” He exclaimed, trying to hide the bags behind the horse. “What are you doing here?” She was wearing the same cloak she had been when he had found her, eyes shining that odd black color.
“I should be asking you that Merlin. What exactly do you think you're going to accomplish by leaving Camelot?” He raised an eyebrow at her almost harsh tone. “Do you think it will save him? Do you think at this point anything can?”
“What?” His blood ran cold as he looked into those black eyes. “Lady Katherine, what are you talking about?” He had taken a step back, running into the fence of the stable.
“Please, despite what you show the world here, I am quite aware you're not stupid.” She took a step forward, reaching out and grabbing his hand. “You really shouldn't have tried to leave Emrys, now I'm going to have to teach you a lesson.”
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He dreamt of the field of wildflowers. But he wasn't alone there this time, he was staring at himself. He cocked his head, confused as to where he was and why he was staring at himself. It wasn't him though, his eyes, they were in a constant state of golden, as if he had forgotten to turn off his magic.
“What's happening?” He asked himself, watching the words mirrored across from him. “Who are you?” Every action he had taken had been mirrored up until that point, but at those words the other Merlin's lips tilted into a smirk, one finger coming up to his lips to quiet him as he looked almost manic, and with that Merlin woke up.
He shot up gasping, body chilled with cold as he laid in a dew soaked field. He scrambled to his feet, trying to distinguish where he was, and how the hell he had gotten here. His frantic eyes shot around, glancing up to see the castle wasn't too far away, and it was close enough for him to hear the foreboding sounds of the warning bells. Camelot was under attack!
“Arthur!” He cried, running through the field, noticing off handedly that for some reason he was no longer wearing shoes. He didn't remember how he had gotten here! The last thing he could remember he had been in Morgana's room. They had been talking about...something. Panic bubbled up his throat as he considered his lack of memory. This was a lot worse than losing a few hours where he didn't know he was sleeping. What the hell was happening to him?
He sprinted back towards Camelot, ignoring the pain in his feet, or the way his lungs burned. The closer he got the more screaming he could hear. He ran up the palace gates, eyes widening at the string of bodies that were laying all around him.
Merlin glanced frantically around, watching as people scrambled to run away all around him. He grabbed a woman running by, and she seemed to recoil when she saw him. “What is going on here?” He asked desperately, and he let her go when she began to hit at his arm.
“S-snake!” Was all she managed to cry as she kept running. Merlin's eyes had widened to saucers and his body had frozen in her wake. The snake! He glanced around, searching through the streets, and all it took was to see one of Arthur's knights before he began sprinting after them.
“Gawain!” He yelled, and Arthur's most trusted knight spun around to face him, eyes widening in the same way the woman's had.
“Merlin?” His face screwed up as he looked at him. “Christ! Are you alright? Did that thing get you?”
“Yeah I'm fine.” Merlin nodded, not sure why Gawain was looking at him in such a shocked manner. “What's going on here?”
Gawain raised an eyebrow at Merlin's self evaluation, obviously not buying it. “The snake attacked at dusk. We think we have driven it out of the city, but it must have had help. There's been so many deaths.”
“Gawain! what part of 'follow my lead' do you not quite understand!?” Arthur barked, running towards him, and then freezing in place when he caught site of him.
“Merlin!?” Arthur's face had grown quite pale when he caught site of him. “Are you?....Where did it get you?”
Seriously? What was wrong with everyone? “It didn't.” He shook his head. “I'm fine.” He wanted to say that he hadn't even been here for any of it, but then that might seem a little suspicious. He didn't even know what had happened to him, and he knew that much.
Arthur was looking at him like he didn't believe he was fine at all. “I have to secure the city. The thing is gone, but Camelot is in panic. Go help Gaius with the wounded, and while you're at it have him look you over.” He turned to Gawain. “Let's go.” Gawain nodded and began to run, and Arthur followed him, turning to yell over his shoulder to Merlin. “Please be careful!”
“You too!” Merlin called, half tempted to run after the blond. Arthur gave him a half confident smirk, though as his eyes scanned Merlin again he looked almost worried before he ran after Gawain. He ran towards the castle, knowing that Gaius would need plenty of help.
His stomach turned as he saw all the injured parties. He had seen the snake, but never did he think it could do this much damage. His eyes widened as he caught site of a woman who had been eviscerated, her entrails lying all over the ground. A little boy clung to her arms, hiding underneath her as he bawled over his lost mother. Merlin walked over, seeing the the child had a gash all the way down his arm.
“It's alright.” He said softly, as if cooing a horse. “Come with me, and I'll get you help.” He reached out to the boy, and the child tried to crawl away from him. Merlin's heart stung as the child clung to his mother. “I promise I'll give you a chance to bury your mum and see her again, but I have to get you somewhere safe.”
He didn't wait to see if the boy nodded or not, he just swept down, grabbing him around the waist and tried to ignore the hands pounding at his back as he carried him towards Gaius. His back was hurting by the time he had gotten the child inside, his fists beating relentlessly at the back of his neck. He swung open the door to where they stayed, and the amount of bodies was almost suffocating.
Screaming and crying echoed throughout the room as people held each other, bloody scrapes, broken bones, death...it was everywhere. The room was so full of bodies it almost seemed to breathe. His eyes scanned the room, setting the boy down as he caught sight of Gwen, Morgana, and Gaius all working to help the injured.
Gwen was carrying a bowl of water and bandages, turning to the open door and almost dropped everything in her hands when she saw him. “Merlin!” She cried, rushing over to him through the throngs of bodies. “Are you alright!?” Why was everyone asking him that?
“Fine.” He said, raising an eyebrow at her. Well you know he was fine except for the fact that he couldn't remember how he had gotten out into that field, or practically anything from the day. “This boy...his arm is hurt.” He tried, but she was still staring at him.
“You're not hurt?” She asked, almost suspiciously. He shook his head, now more than a little curious as to what she was talking about. “Where did it all come from then?”
He opened his mouth, once, twice, and then finally settled with. “Huh?” She reached into the bowl, pulling out a rag and she reached out, rubbing it across Merlin's cheek.
The Sorcerer blanched a little as she pulled it away, and the entire towel was tinged a dark pink. “The blood Merlin...you're covered in it.” His stomach lurched as fear consumed him. He grabbed the bowl out of Gwen's hands, bringing it up to his face and seeing his image in the distorted metal picture. His skin was a stark chalky white in comparison with the crimson covering him. It looked as if he had jumped into a river of blood. He swallowed, feeling very light headed. Where had it all come from? ...What had happened to him? He wasn't hurt, which was the most terrifying thing of all, because if it wasn't his...that meant it had to be someone elses.
“I...don't...know...” He felt as if he were going to faint. Gwen was looking at him with almost scared eyes, and he knew he had to think of something. “Must have been out in the city. The boy's mother was covered in it.” He immediately felt guilty at the look the boy gave him, and his doe eyes filled with tears at the mention of his mother. “I'm sorry.” He said to the boy, turning up to Gwen. “It doesn't matter now. There are people here who need help.” She gave a nod, and she led the boy over to a corner to begin treating his wound.
They worked for hours. Merlin wasn't even aware when the sun had risen, or the warning bells had stopped howling. His body was beyond exhaustion, but he pushed it aside. The bodies just kept piling in. They would bandage them up and send them on their way, and some of the stronger ones would stay to help out. He was getting more and more worried about Arthur, and almost relished in the fact that he didn't have time to dwell on it.
He had no idea how one creature could cause so much damage. It was almost as if its purpose had been to hurt as many people as possible, and it had help? Who would help such a thing? There was a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, and he knew that as soon as all of this caught up with him he was going to break down.
“How's everything going?” At the familiar voice Merlin spun around, seeing Arthur talking to Gaius. ...He hadn't even heard him come in. Arthur looked exhausted, and he was sure everyone in the kingdom was. Merlin was positive no one had got much sleep the night before. He face was scratched, covered in soot, and worry for his kingdom was etched into his features. Almost as if he were taking everyone's pain onto his own shoulders, which is what he always did.
Setting down the basin, he walked over to the two talking quietly of the damages. “How is it out there?” Arthur turned to him, his face screwing up in the same way it had earlier when he saw what he looked like. The only difference was this time Merlin knew why he looked so shocked.
“The creature has disappeared, and we've managed to restore order, but the people are terrified of another vicious attack.” He nodded, for he was too tired to form any coherent words. Arthur stared at him for quite some time, before obviously giving up patience and asking the one thing he really wanted to know. “Why do you look like that? Are you hurt?”
He shook his head. He had heard this question quite often today. “Just my feet.” He muttered, and both Arthur and Gaius looked down to his bloody cut up appendages. “I woke up without shoes and...”
“You woke up?” Arthur interjected, confusion covering his face.
“From here!” Merlin lied. “I was sleeping here when I heard the attack, and I must have run off without grabbing my boots.” He noticed the sharp look of suspicion Gaius gave him, after all he would obviously know that he was not in his room.
“You're such an idiot Merlin. Honestly, who runs out into a screaming crowd without any shoes?” But he didn't look mad, as a matter of fact he still looked worried. “Come with me. I need help getting out of this armor.” Merlin was fairly certain that he didn't just want him to come with him to help him get out of his armor, but he said nothing, only nodding as he turned to Gaius.
“I will go help the Prince and then be back to help with the wounded.” He glanced around to see Gwen curled up in a corner, eyes closed in sleep, as a matter of fact practically everyone had succumb to exhaustion.
“Go Merlin. Get some rest. You can't help anyone if you pass over from exhaustion, and for god's sake wash your face.” Gaius grumbled. “I can't look at you without wanting to wince.” Merlin nodded, following Arthur out of the door and back towards his chambers.
The blond said nothing as they walked, obviously killing him with silence until they were behind closed doors. “Merlin, where did the blood come from?” Arthur's voice was strained, exhausted, and Merlin knew he could use this to his advantage.
“You look like you're about to keel over.” He tried, walking up behind the prince and beginning to work on his armor. “You need sleep.” His fingers shook as he undid the armor, and Arthur's hand cover his own when he reached around his chest to undo the metal.
“Where did the blood come from?” Arthur asked again, turning around to face him. Merlin sighed when a gloved hand came to the side of his face, and Arthur tilted his head up to look at him. “Tell me.”
Blue eyes stared into his, and he trembled all over. Arthur looked so sincere, and he found himself stuttering out the truth, or at least a half truth. “I don't know. I woke up in the middle of the city and I was covered in it...I don't know what happened, and it scares the hell out of me.” He pulled away, turning his back to the blond. “Arthur...it's not my blood.”
Arthur slipped the armor off his shoulders, letting it clang on the floor as he walked up behind Merlin, wrapping his arms around his waist. “Let's get it off you then.” Merlin nodded, letting himself be held as Arthur led him over to the basin.
Reaching around him, Arthur began to tug at the bottom of his shirt, and Merlin lifted his arms up to have it swept over his head. His hands were at the hem of his pants next, untying them and letting them fall to the floor. “I thought it was my job to help you undress.” He teased, even though he wasn't exactly in a teasing mood.
“Yes, well I want to sleep sometime in the near future, and if I left it up to you we'd be here forever.” He placed a kiss to the back of his shoulder blade. “It's obvious you don't know how to dress yourself, I assumed it would be the same with undressing.”
“Har Har Har.” He said sarcastically. “Well I seem to have no problem undressing you.” He said slyly. Getting nothing for his efforts but a rag to the face.
“Clean yourself up, and then come to bed.” Merlin stared in amazement as Arthur began to strip, watching as clothes fell to the ground, and gaping at the bare skin. Even in this exhausted state he still felt a tingling in his lower regions as the blond crawled into his bed.
Merlin scrubbed at his face, blanching as the rag turned a bright red, ringing out pink as he tried it in his hair and neck. The water was a murky red by the time he was finished, and yet he still felt as if he was covered in the irony substance. He could hear Arthur's quiet snoring from the bed, and he turned to see that he was laying on his stomach, fast asleep.
He tip toed over to the bed, wondering if he should put his blood spattered clothing back on and go back to his own chambers. Arthur had been sleepy, that was probably the only reason he had invited him to stay, and honestly, he was confused enough already about what was going on around him, he wasn't sure if he wanted to add the confusion between him and Arthur to the list.
Turning to leave, he jumped when Arthur snatched at his arm, keeping him in place as he turned around. “Stay.” He demanded, pulling him forward and into the warmth of the bed. He scooted over, turning on his side and allowing for Merlin to crawl in.
Merlin did get in, awkwardly laying on his side and sighing in pleasure as Arthur spooned him from behind, holding him to his body. It was only then Merlin realized just how worried he had been about the Prince, and how good it felt to be against his body, and to have the real life Arthur holding him after such a traumatic attack.
Arthur sleepily entwined their fingers together, holding him as he kissed along his neck. “Just let me sleep a few hours, alright? After that I have to speak with my father and deal with the aftermath of this attack.” Merlin turned, seeing Arthur's heavy lidded eyes as he fought off falling back to sleep.
“Of course my lord.” He said, and he whined into his mouth as Arthur gave him a sleepy kiss.
“I'm glad you weren't hurt...” Arthur said, settling into the the area just behind Merlin's neck. The grip on him went slack after awhile, and Merlin knew Arthur was sleeping once again. No, he wasn't hurt...not really. But all that blood...it had to come from somewhere. He had to have hurt someone, and yet he didn't remember! He fell asleep wrapped in Arthur's arms, trying to remember what him and Morgana had talked about. It was about him and...golden eyes.
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A.N.- I don't even have anything to say for myself, this chapter was just crazy. Poor Merlin...cuddles Merlin plushie! Please Review!
Rating: NC17
Warning/Spoiler: Slashy and some spoiler up to 2X4
Summary: Arthur finds a new punishment for Merlin, and a series of accidents lead them to discover they could be more than master and servant.
Disclaimer: I sadly don't own
Carry on My Wayward Servant
Chapter 9: Attack
“Please Morgana...please tell me.” Merlin pleaded, staring up at the girl as his eyes watered. “He is everything to me,” He said, not bothering to sensor the fact that he was revealing way more than he normally would, and way more than he aught to. “I can't hurt him.”
The lady stared at him for what seemed like ages before giving a heavy sigh. Morgana moved out of the way of the door, and Merlin rushed inside. Rubbing a hand through his hair as he began to pace back and forth throughout the room. “You're staring at me like you want to kill me, and so the way I see it is that whatever you saw had to have been pretty awful, but I wouldn't hurt him!” He pleaded to the girl, who was only giving him a sad look of pity.
“Merlin I know.” She said softly, regret flooding her features. “I'm sorry you had to see me in that state this morning.” She trailed off, sitting at her table. “I had only just had the vision.” She bit her lip. “Dream.” She corrected herself. “I was upset and frantic, and I should have never treated you that way.”
He sank to the floor, his legs giving out underneath of him as he placed his palms over his eyes, rubbing furiously. “I don't blame you for anything you said Milady, I just need to know why you said them.”
“Your eyes...I'll never forget your eyes.” His hands fell away from his face, meeting Morgana's pale one as her gaze was far away. “They were glowing a fierce gold as you came to him, and he...” She swallowed roughly, turning harsh seawater eyes to Merlin. “Arthur kissed you as if you were the thing most precious to him in the world.” There was a harsh accusation accompanied with that revelation, and Merlin's face shot away in shame.
“Arthur would never kiss me.” He lied, the conviction dying in his throat.
“He was naked when I got there this morning, and you were attending to him far earlier than any servant normally would be.” He gave a humorless laugh...Arthur was right, Morgana really was perceptive. “Don't worry he defended your virtue. It would seem you have Arthur Pendragon completely smitten.” It was her turn to laugh. “Arthur has sworn off talking to me forever at my insult to your honor.”
Merlin felt as if he had just swallowed glass, and he had honestly never been so afraid as he had been this moment sitting in front of Morgana. “I don't know what to say.” And he didn't. His tongue felt too big for his mouth, swollen with apprehension and fear.
“Say you'll leave Camelot.” The words were like four consecutive knives being stabbed into his gut, and then the Lady Morgana just kept twisting the blades. “I like you Merlin. I think you are a true and noble friend, and I hate having to speak to you this way, but I also know that my visions hold a note of truth to them. So believe me when I say that although I hate having to hurt you like this, I would hate even more to see you plunge a dagger into Arthur's chest and rip out his heart.”
“You're not talking figuratively, are you?” Merlin asked, heart pounding loud enough in his ears that he was sure he would go deaf. He was only thankful his legs had collapsed earlier, because there was no way at this moment he could stand.
“No. It's what I saw, and he let you do it!” She continued, voice thick with disgust. “I didn't tell him about the eyes Merlin. But if you don't leave Camelot I will...I'll tell Arthur that he is sleeping with a sorcerer.”
He could just imagine Arthur's face when Morgana told him. He knew Arthur well enough by now to envision the look of betrayed disgust that would befall his face before he called the guards and had him imprisoned. ...The fact that he had lived with him so long, shared his bed, well...he would most certainly be burnt for this. A hangman's ax was far too generous for his level of betrayal. When Merlin looked up again, warm tears were flowing freely down his face.
“Please don't tell him. I don't think I would hurt him, but I would never risk his life.” He shut his eyes as the tears continued to fall. “I'll leave if it'll protect him, and I'm sorry that you're looking at me like that right now.” His eyes were a brilliant blue as he got shakily to his feet, walking to Morgana and taking her hand. “I can't help who I am Milady. I know you understand that better than anyone.”
He wasn't prepared for the girl to spring against his chest, wrapping his arms around him. “Merlin I'm so sorry!” When he felt the wetness against his neck he realized Morgana was crying too. “I don't judge you for what you are, and I will never tell anyone.” She stroked his head, and they both stood there wrapped together in a pitiful embrace. “I just get so scared sometimes, and the dreams had been getting better, but this one...” She pulled away, using her hand to wipe at Merlin's tears. “I heard a voice in my head the whole time. It told me this would come to pass. It called you by the name Emrys and said you would betray Camelot, but in doing so you would save them all.”
It felt like every ounce of blood had drained from body until he was just a shell. The words ran over and over in his mind, and he wasn't even aware his feet were moving until his back hit the door. “Please Morgana...just give me until tonight to get away.” He rubbed his eyes over and over, as if by doing so he could somehow clear the last couple of hours away from his mind. “I won't be the cause of any pain here in Camelot, and I will not help that thing.” He bit out hatefully, and Morgana's eyebrows knitted before giving a slight nod.
“I think what you're doing is very brave.” Morgana said softly, her voice sorrowful and guilt ridden. “I know how much he means to you, and that it can't be easy to consider leaving him.” He gave him a tentative smile. “He really doesn't deserve you.” Her attempt at humor fell on deaf ears as he just nodded.
He gave a bow. “I'm sorry to have troubled you Milady,” His voice shook. “Perhaps we can see each other again someday.” He barely got out that last past, turning and stumbling out of the door as he gripped the hallway. He had only made around the corner before he dropped to his knees, sobbing against the cold stone as his forehead pressed into the ground.
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Merlin's fingers were trembling as he finished loading his pack. It contained the precious few belongings he had acquired since coming here. It didn't consist of much, a few clothes, a spell book, and he had carefully wrapped the staff he had gotten from the sidhe. He had planned it out in his mind, over and over again. Arthur had reacted many different ways: he had laughed in his face, he had hit him, and his personal favorite was the prince professing his undying love for him and begging him at his feet not to leave. ...He doubted that one would happen, but it was a nice thought as he considered leaving this life. Ealdor wasn't that bad though. True Will was now gone, but he would be with his mother. He would say good-bye to Arthur, and then he would say good-bye to Gaius and Gwen. His hand trembled as he reached for the door. The last time he had said good-bye to Arthur had been hard, but back then he hadn't been in love with him. Now, now it was going to be damn near impossible.
The first place he stopped was the stables. If any of the three he had to tell had somewhat negative reactions, than at least he would already have his stuff in a safe place. He reached out to the horse, petting its nose as he reached out for a saddle.
“Running away?” The voice made him jump at least ten feet in the air, and he spun around, meeting the curious eyes of Katherine.
“Milady you scared me!” He exclaimed, trying to hide the bags behind the horse. “What are you doing here?” She was wearing the same cloak she had been when he had found her, eyes shining that odd black color.
“I should be asking you that Merlin. What exactly do you think you're going to accomplish by leaving Camelot?” He raised an eyebrow at her almost harsh tone. “Do you think it will save him? Do you think at this point anything can?”
“What?” His blood ran cold as he looked into those black eyes. “Lady Katherine, what are you talking about?” He had taken a step back, running into the fence of the stable.
“Please, despite what you show the world here, I am quite aware you're not stupid.” She took a step forward, reaching out and grabbing his hand. “You really shouldn't have tried to leave Emrys, now I'm going to have to teach you a lesson.”
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He dreamt of the field of wildflowers. But he wasn't alone there this time, he was staring at himself. He cocked his head, confused as to where he was and why he was staring at himself. It wasn't him though, his eyes, they were in a constant state of golden, as if he had forgotten to turn off his magic.
“What's happening?” He asked himself, watching the words mirrored across from him. “Who are you?” Every action he had taken had been mirrored up until that point, but at those words the other Merlin's lips tilted into a smirk, one finger coming up to his lips to quiet him as he looked almost manic, and with that Merlin woke up.
He shot up gasping, body chilled with cold as he laid in a dew soaked field. He scrambled to his feet, trying to distinguish where he was, and how the hell he had gotten here. His frantic eyes shot around, glancing up to see the castle wasn't too far away, and it was close enough for him to hear the foreboding sounds of the warning bells. Camelot was under attack!
“Arthur!” He cried, running through the field, noticing off handedly that for some reason he was no longer wearing shoes. He didn't remember how he had gotten here! The last thing he could remember he had been in Morgana's room. They had been talking about...something. Panic bubbled up his throat as he considered his lack of memory. This was a lot worse than losing a few hours where he didn't know he was sleeping. What the hell was happening to him?
He sprinted back towards Camelot, ignoring the pain in his feet, or the way his lungs burned. The closer he got the more screaming he could hear. He ran up the palace gates, eyes widening at the string of bodies that were laying all around him.
Merlin glanced frantically around, watching as people scrambled to run away all around him. He grabbed a woman running by, and she seemed to recoil when she saw him. “What is going on here?” He asked desperately, and he let her go when she began to hit at his arm.
“S-snake!” Was all she managed to cry as she kept running. Merlin's eyes had widened to saucers and his body had frozen in her wake. The snake! He glanced around, searching through the streets, and all it took was to see one of Arthur's knights before he began sprinting after them.
“Gawain!” He yelled, and Arthur's most trusted knight spun around to face him, eyes widening in the same way the woman's had.
“Merlin?” His face screwed up as he looked at him. “Christ! Are you alright? Did that thing get you?”
“Yeah I'm fine.” Merlin nodded, not sure why Gawain was looking at him in such a shocked manner. “What's going on here?”
Gawain raised an eyebrow at Merlin's self evaluation, obviously not buying it. “The snake attacked at dusk. We think we have driven it out of the city, but it must have had help. There's been so many deaths.”
“Gawain! what part of 'follow my lead' do you not quite understand!?” Arthur barked, running towards him, and then freezing in place when he caught site of him.
“Merlin!?” Arthur's face had grown quite pale when he caught site of him. “Are you?....Where did it get you?”
Seriously? What was wrong with everyone? “It didn't.” He shook his head. “I'm fine.” He wanted to say that he hadn't even been here for any of it, but then that might seem a little suspicious. He didn't even know what had happened to him, and he knew that much.
Arthur was looking at him like he didn't believe he was fine at all. “I have to secure the city. The thing is gone, but Camelot is in panic. Go help Gaius with the wounded, and while you're at it have him look you over.” He turned to Gawain. “Let's go.” Gawain nodded and began to run, and Arthur followed him, turning to yell over his shoulder to Merlin. “Please be careful!”
“You too!” Merlin called, half tempted to run after the blond. Arthur gave him a half confident smirk, though as his eyes scanned Merlin again he looked almost worried before he ran after Gawain. He ran towards the castle, knowing that Gaius would need plenty of help.
His stomach turned as he saw all the injured parties. He had seen the snake, but never did he think it could do this much damage. His eyes widened as he caught site of a woman who had been eviscerated, her entrails lying all over the ground. A little boy clung to her arms, hiding underneath her as he bawled over his lost mother. Merlin walked over, seeing the the child had a gash all the way down his arm.
“It's alright.” He said softly, as if cooing a horse. “Come with me, and I'll get you help.” He reached out to the boy, and the child tried to crawl away from him. Merlin's heart stung as the child clung to his mother. “I promise I'll give you a chance to bury your mum and see her again, but I have to get you somewhere safe.”
He didn't wait to see if the boy nodded or not, he just swept down, grabbing him around the waist and tried to ignore the hands pounding at his back as he carried him towards Gaius. His back was hurting by the time he had gotten the child inside, his fists beating relentlessly at the back of his neck. He swung open the door to where they stayed, and the amount of bodies was almost suffocating.
Screaming and crying echoed throughout the room as people held each other, bloody scrapes, broken bones, death...it was everywhere. The room was so full of bodies it almost seemed to breathe. His eyes scanned the room, setting the boy down as he caught sight of Gwen, Morgana, and Gaius all working to help the injured.
Gwen was carrying a bowl of water and bandages, turning to the open door and almost dropped everything in her hands when she saw him. “Merlin!” She cried, rushing over to him through the throngs of bodies. “Are you alright!?” Why was everyone asking him that?
“Fine.” He said, raising an eyebrow at her. Well you know he was fine except for the fact that he couldn't remember how he had gotten out into that field, or practically anything from the day. “This boy...his arm is hurt.” He tried, but she was still staring at him.
“You're not hurt?” She asked, almost suspiciously. He shook his head, now more than a little curious as to what she was talking about. “Where did it all come from then?”
He opened his mouth, once, twice, and then finally settled with. “Huh?” She reached into the bowl, pulling out a rag and she reached out, rubbing it across Merlin's cheek.
The Sorcerer blanched a little as she pulled it away, and the entire towel was tinged a dark pink. “The blood Merlin...you're covered in it.” His stomach lurched as fear consumed him. He grabbed the bowl out of Gwen's hands, bringing it up to his face and seeing his image in the distorted metal picture. His skin was a stark chalky white in comparison with the crimson covering him. It looked as if he had jumped into a river of blood. He swallowed, feeling very light headed. Where had it all come from? ...What had happened to him? He wasn't hurt, which was the most terrifying thing of all, because if it wasn't his...that meant it had to be someone elses.
“I...don't...know...” He felt as if he were going to faint. Gwen was looking at him with almost scared eyes, and he knew he had to think of something. “Must have been out in the city. The boy's mother was covered in it.” He immediately felt guilty at the look the boy gave him, and his doe eyes filled with tears at the mention of his mother. “I'm sorry.” He said to the boy, turning up to Gwen. “It doesn't matter now. There are people here who need help.” She gave a nod, and she led the boy over to a corner to begin treating his wound.
They worked for hours. Merlin wasn't even aware when the sun had risen, or the warning bells had stopped howling. His body was beyond exhaustion, but he pushed it aside. The bodies just kept piling in. They would bandage them up and send them on their way, and some of the stronger ones would stay to help out. He was getting more and more worried about Arthur, and almost relished in the fact that he didn't have time to dwell on it.
He had no idea how one creature could cause so much damage. It was almost as if its purpose had been to hurt as many people as possible, and it had help? Who would help such a thing? There was a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, and he knew that as soon as all of this caught up with him he was going to break down.
“How's everything going?” At the familiar voice Merlin spun around, seeing Arthur talking to Gaius. ...He hadn't even heard him come in. Arthur looked exhausted, and he was sure everyone in the kingdom was. Merlin was positive no one had got much sleep the night before. He face was scratched, covered in soot, and worry for his kingdom was etched into his features. Almost as if he were taking everyone's pain onto his own shoulders, which is what he always did.
Setting down the basin, he walked over to the two talking quietly of the damages. “How is it out there?” Arthur turned to him, his face screwing up in the same way it had earlier when he saw what he looked like. The only difference was this time Merlin knew why he looked so shocked.
“The creature has disappeared, and we've managed to restore order, but the people are terrified of another vicious attack.” He nodded, for he was too tired to form any coherent words. Arthur stared at him for quite some time, before obviously giving up patience and asking the one thing he really wanted to know. “Why do you look like that? Are you hurt?”
He shook his head. He had heard this question quite often today. “Just my feet.” He muttered, and both Arthur and Gaius looked down to his bloody cut up appendages. “I woke up without shoes and...”
“You woke up?” Arthur interjected, confusion covering his face.
“From here!” Merlin lied. “I was sleeping here when I heard the attack, and I must have run off without grabbing my boots.” He noticed the sharp look of suspicion Gaius gave him, after all he would obviously know that he was not in his room.
“You're such an idiot Merlin. Honestly, who runs out into a screaming crowd without any shoes?” But he didn't look mad, as a matter of fact he still looked worried. “Come with me. I need help getting out of this armor.” Merlin was fairly certain that he didn't just want him to come with him to help him get out of his armor, but he said nothing, only nodding as he turned to Gaius.
“I will go help the Prince and then be back to help with the wounded.” He glanced around to see Gwen curled up in a corner, eyes closed in sleep, as a matter of fact practically everyone had succumb to exhaustion.
“Go Merlin. Get some rest. You can't help anyone if you pass over from exhaustion, and for god's sake wash your face.” Gaius grumbled. “I can't look at you without wanting to wince.” Merlin nodded, following Arthur out of the door and back towards his chambers.
The blond said nothing as they walked, obviously killing him with silence until they were behind closed doors. “Merlin, where did the blood come from?” Arthur's voice was strained, exhausted, and Merlin knew he could use this to his advantage.
“You look like you're about to keel over.” He tried, walking up behind the prince and beginning to work on his armor. “You need sleep.” His fingers shook as he undid the armor, and Arthur's hand cover his own when he reached around his chest to undo the metal.
“Where did the blood come from?” Arthur asked again, turning around to face him. Merlin sighed when a gloved hand came to the side of his face, and Arthur tilted his head up to look at him. “Tell me.”
Blue eyes stared into his, and he trembled all over. Arthur looked so sincere, and he found himself stuttering out the truth, or at least a half truth. “I don't know. I woke up in the middle of the city and I was covered in it...I don't know what happened, and it scares the hell out of me.” He pulled away, turning his back to the blond. “Arthur...it's not my blood.”
Arthur slipped the armor off his shoulders, letting it clang on the floor as he walked up behind Merlin, wrapping his arms around his waist. “Let's get it off you then.” Merlin nodded, letting himself be held as Arthur led him over to the basin.
Reaching around him, Arthur began to tug at the bottom of his shirt, and Merlin lifted his arms up to have it swept over his head. His hands were at the hem of his pants next, untying them and letting them fall to the floor. “I thought it was my job to help you undress.” He teased, even though he wasn't exactly in a teasing mood.
“Yes, well I want to sleep sometime in the near future, and if I left it up to you we'd be here forever.” He placed a kiss to the back of his shoulder blade. “It's obvious you don't know how to dress yourself, I assumed it would be the same with undressing.”
“Har Har Har.” He said sarcastically. “Well I seem to have no problem undressing you.” He said slyly. Getting nothing for his efforts but a rag to the face.
“Clean yourself up, and then come to bed.” Merlin stared in amazement as Arthur began to strip, watching as clothes fell to the ground, and gaping at the bare skin. Even in this exhausted state he still felt a tingling in his lower regions as the blond crawled into his bed.
Merlin scrubbed at his face, blanching as the rag turned a bright red, ringing out pink as he tried it in his hair and neck. The water was a murky red by the time he was finished, and yet he still felt as if he was covered in the irony substance. He could hear Arthur's quiet snoring from the bed, and he turned to see that he was laying on his stomach, fast asleep.
He tip toed over to the bed, wondering if he should put his blood spattered clothing back on and go back to his own chambers. Arthur had been sleepy, that was probably the only reason he had invited him to stay, and honestly, he was confused enough already about what was going on around him, he wasn't sure if he wanted to add the confusion between him and Arthur to the list.
Turning to leave, he jumped when Arthur snatched at his arm, keeping him in place as he turned around. “Stay.” He demanded, pulling him forward and into the warmth of the bed. He scooted over, turning on his side and allowing for Merlin to crawl in.
Merlin did get in, awkwardly laying on his side and sighing in pleasure as Arthur spooned him from behind, holding him to his body. It was only then Merlin realized just how worried he had been about the Prince, and how good it felt to be against his body, and to have the real life Arthur holding him after such a traumatic attack.
Arthur sleepily entwined their fingers together, holding him as he kissed along his neck. “Just let me sleep a few hours, alright? After that I have to speak with my father and deal with the aftermath of this attack.” Merlin turned, seeing Arthur's heavy lidded eyes as he fought off falling back to sleep.
“Of course my lord.” He said, and he whined into his mouth as Arthur gave him a sleepy kiss.
“I'm glad you weren't hurt...” Arthur said, settling into the the area just behind Merlin's neck. The grip on him went slack after awhile, and Merlin knew Arthur was sleeping once again. No, he wasn't hurt...not really. But all that blood...it had to come from somewhere. He had to have hurt someone, and yet he didn't remember! He fell asleep wrapped in Arthur's arms, trying to remember what him and Morgana had talked about. It was about him and...golden eyes.
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A.N.- I don't even have anything to say for myself, this chapter was just crazy. Poor Merlin...cuddles Merlin plushie! Please Review!