Continuation of my previous post.
We waited in line for a long time again and I didn't even care. They finally took us inside the lot and we waited some more, then they took us this roundabout way to the stage because there was filming going on in the alley. We passed by the front porch of the Knight home from BTAudition and yelled hello to Kendall even though he wasn't home (we're silly) and then they led us down another alley. As we were approaching the building we passed right by where we'd met Scott earlier and I saw this blonde girl on a phone and it was Halston. I couldn't stop staring, I was just like...wow. Halston's right there. I kept staring as we walked past and she felt my eyes and I wasn't like rude staring but I was in shock and didn't smile or anything and she stared at me for a second and went back to her phone convo but she was hunched over then and I'm like “Guys, did you see that?” Melissa and Maral had been all excited about something and I thought it was that but no, they were just talking about how we'd met James in that spot earlier. I was like “Halston, it was Halston, how did you not see her?”
We were taken in and seated and our seats were all the way at the far right, which meant we couldn't really see the kitchen set too well, we could see the living room set a little better, but what we were looking straight down on was the space in between the living room sets and the set they'd built for the Tom Bergeron Show. I was bummed, I'd wanted to be closer to the action but then again, hey-James would be there. We were going to see James. That was good enough for me.
A few minutes later Halston walked by across the front with an older guy and I was like “I know him.” I pointed out Halston to the girls and then it clicked-the older guy was James' dad. We watched them go further down and take seats in the middle of the seating area, where they'd have a good view of the living room set. I couldn't believe it, James' dad! And of course Halston, which was...wow. An older dude came and sat next to me and we started talking some, turns out he'd been to one taping of the show before. He explained that we'd be shown the pilot episode first in order to have an idea what was going on, then they'd do the taping itself. He told me about the funny guy who was in charge of keeping us entertained and I knew immediately it had to be Joby. He arrived and the music started and it was like a little party, I don't even know. Or maybe it was just Melissa and Maral who made it a party with their singing and dancing, though I'd join in when I actually knew a song.
My eyes kept straying to Halston and Mr. Maslow. I actually watched them a lot and got a good idea of how close they are. They turned down the lights and we watched the pilot episode, which was really funny. I'm not kidding, this is a funny show. I will totally be watching it, and not just the James episode. After that they got into place for the first scene, which James was not in. He did, however, walk into our view to wait during the filming of that scene and I don't think any of us has any idea what happened in that scene even though they shot it three times. We were glued to James, his every move. He was wearing a black leather jacket and this gold chain necklace and either a blue or green shirt, it was a dark shade, but oh my god. OH MY GOD. He was beautiful. He was getting himself in the zone, you could see it happening, watch him get all focused and try to loosen up for it. He stood in place for a while watching the scene, he moved around a little here and there getting himself prepared, he was in the make-up chair for a while, he chatted with some of the cast off and on...I couldn't even contain myself, we all just stared. He's so so beautiful. He did the things we see him do all the time, the rubbing of his hands together, and HE CHEWED ON HIS LIPS FOR WHAT SEEMED LIKE HOURS HE JUST KEPT GOING BITING AND CHEWING AND BLINKING IN THAT JAMES WAY AND THE WAY HE STOOD AND SO MUCH JUST SO MUCH OVERLOAD OF ALL OF JAMES' LITTLE MANNERISMS THAT KILL ME ON A DAILY BASIS.
There's a scene in the show that was shot the day before, we didn't get to see it, but his hair is combed down like in BTGirlfriends and he's wearing a v-neck sweater and he gets his face smooshed with cake and they kept playing that scene because the other characters were watching it on T.V., and James' face while watching the playback was adorable. He laughed at himself, cheeks all red, he was so adorable.
In between takes they play music and get the crowd pumped, and during that first scene they played “Big Time Rush.” The three of us sang and danced and I know there had to be other Rushers in attendance but nobody else was into it, I don't even get it. But we sang really loud and James looked up at us and laughed, so we sang to him and he loved it. That was a fun time.
Later they played “Windows Down” and the three of us screamed “Woohoo” so loud I think we scared everyone in the place. James spun around and looked up at us and nodded, he was laughing again like “You girls are so funny.” GOD I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
And I learned a new song that night, something called “Cha Cha Slide”? Melissa and Maral got up and did it while I laughed with the dude next to me. He and I had bonded over recognizing Jason Hervey, who is apparently some kind of producer on the show. We spazzed out together over that while my girls had never even heard of “The Wonder Years.” I'm so old.
They set up for the scene James was in and it starts with a knock on the door. We all thought it would be James but this other guy walked in with a birthday cake and Scott was shocked, like what the hell is going on? Turns out it's his best friend that flew in to see him for his birthday and we all got to sing to him. His birthday is the 22nd.
The next scene they filmed was James' scene, and from the moment that front door opened and he started talking, our mouths just dropped. We all three simultaneously grabbed hands and held tight because we wanted to scream, he was amazing. The accent, the attitude, the swagger. He plays a jerk in the show and we'd known that but...wow. We were not prepared for this side of James Maslow. I think we all stopped breathing every time he opened his mouth and then when he sat down on the couch all rude-like and lifted his boot up onto the table MY BRAIN JUST LIKE FRIED I DIDN'T KNOW HOW WE WERE GOING TO STAND THIS SCENE BEING DONE AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN. Melissa described his character as “James Diamond on steroids.” The best I could come up with was if James Diamond had stuck with Hawk, let Hawk turn him into Jamez with no contact with the other three guys, he would've been this character right here. This guy's name was Ricky Adams but I could easily call him Jamez in the flesh. He blew us away.
One thing about James, and I'd always known this (plus you hear it from the people he works with) is that he is a professional, a damn good actor who is prepared and takes his craft seriously. He did not mess up one line, delivered it perfectly each time, was ready and right on cue and just nailed it. Every single time. He's like a director's dream. I hope and pray he sticks with acting after BTR because he's amazing. He really really is. I was even more impressed than I imagined I would be.
And I still don't know why it was necessary, but every time he was on we all grabbed hands again. I think we just couldn't contain all our feelings and needed a quiet way to get it out. So we squeezed hands and made little noises occasionally and sometimes I had to look away because he is just so intense when he's doing a scene. I just...I can't deal with it.
Lines that will forever stand out to me: “Starring...Ricky Adams.” And then there's the repeated “Waaah waaaaah.” And at the end he has this scene with one of the daughters and he's such an asshole oh my God and we all just like gasped at how harsh he was because damn, just damn. Diamond may be full of himself like Ricky Adams, but he has a heart. Ricky Adams doesn't. It was just so harsh. This is why I say James is an amazing actor. His delivery is so intense. I cannot WAIT to see him do other roles.
Anyway, moving on. After the living room scene they filmed a kitchen scene and then another living room scene but James wasn't in either one. We still had fun and laughed, because again-really funny show. Joby talked to Halston on the mic a few times, at one point singing Alanis Morrissette's “Ironic” and then he threw her name into it. “It's like rain on Halston's wedding day.” GOD JOBY MY HEART DON'T DO THAT. But it was funny. And he did little contests with audience members and there was this cute little boy named Tucker who was determined to win the Yes/No game but he sucked really bad once they got started. Before that, though, Joby was asking him a bunch of questions about himself and he was cracking us up, Halston was laughing so hard and when Tucker lost she was all sad for him. I really love Halston.
Lulu Antariksa showed up for a short time, too, but she left before we could approach her. I was bummed.
The last scene was another one with James, and it also involved Tom Bergeron and Scott. They had to do that one a bunch of times because of flickering lights and we couldn't see it from where we were sitting but they had it showing on the monitors. There's one part where James gives this total James Diamond “WHAT?” and we died. And we cracked up at one part where they were all right in the middle of the scene, everyone so focused, and suddenly Scott said, “Flickering lights.” James' face was hilarious, he was so lost like “Huh?” but trying not to break character. Tom was the same way, they were just like “Is this some improvising you're doing?” It took everyone, even the crew, a while to understand that Scott was trying to say there were flickering lights up above. Then everyone laughed. So they fixed that finally, and shot the scene a few more times, and then they did some wrap-up scenes and it was done. We didn't want to leave.
But there was a curtain call. We stood up and applauded for everyone, and when James came out we screamed really super loud. The D.J. started playing music and the cast was dancing, James dancing with these two adorable little girls that were on the show. Then that Gangnam song came on and one of the cast members started doing the dance perfectly while James continued to dance with the girl who plays Janie. Yes, we were all “awwing” and melting all over the place. He let go of her, though, and started to do the dance himself and we screamed so loud, holy shit. He's got moves. He didn't do it for long, but while he did we were just like WOW. He was laughing with the kids, you could tell he bonded with the kids on the show really well.
The audience started to leave and we didn't want to, James was still on that stage. Halston and James' dad walked by us and I wanted to stop her but we were too far away and I was sad, I had decided I was going to go say hi. We watched her and James' dad go down to the stage and then Maral noticed that the girls who had been sitting in front of us (who found us ridiculous with our BTR love, mind you) were down on the stage talking to James. She was like “Wait, how did they get down there? If they can get down there, so can we.”
So we rushed down toward the exit and everyone was going straight but a woman and a little boy turned left and we didn't know if we could go down there but tried anyway. I thought the page was going to stop us, I think he was about to, but we took off anyway and joined the people down by the stage. As we got closer we saw that James was taking pics with a few fans and Maral was like “I just want him to sign my birthday card. I'll be happy with that.” She wanted a pic, too, and then realized she already had one and was like “Oh, duh.” But we got closer and noticed Halston was standing off to the side, nobody was approaching her or talking to her. James' dad was behind her somewhat. We watched James signing a few autographs and taking pics, and the little boy on the show ran up to him and they talked for a minute, it was so obvious the little boy like worships him. Which is funny considering his character does on the show, too. But anyway. The boy was cute with James and they were talking when we got up close enough to Halston. Maral got her attention and she turned around, surprised but then we smiled at her and Maral said she loves “How to Rock” and you could tell she was really surprised but smiled and said thank you and I told her that Grace and Nelson are the best things on that show (sorry, it's true) and she was like “Aww, wow, thank you!” You could seriously tell that she is not used to that at all. So Maral asked if she would sign her birthday card and Halston did, she wrote “Happy birthday” and signed it and gave Maral a hug and I said, “I have to say, this is the best birthday present I ever gave someone.” Halston laughed and said, “Yeah, I'll bet.” She knew I was referring to James. We laughed together then and I hugged her.
Another fan had gotten between us and James during this time, but I was hyper aware of James and never completely took my focus off him so I knew he'd been listening to everything we said with Halston. After that fan left he joined us and Maral asked for him to sign the birthday card and he did, told her happy birthday again. Like five times. It was so cute. I liked that Halston didn't move away this time, she stayed right there with us instead of feeling like she was intruding. Melissa said she usually does step away when James is with fans, and it made me feel good that she didn't feel like she needed to with us. She knew we didn't hate her. Melissa asked James if he was enjoying his time off and he said, “Yeah, doing Figure It Out tomorrow and then Sunday I'm surfing and working on my truck.”
My heart stopped. He was doing FIO the next day. I knew how easy it was to get tickets to that show. I was supposed to leave at 6 A.M. but what if I could stay until the afternoon?
Maral and Melissa hugged him, and then I thanked him and we were about to step away when Melissa goes, “Kellie, get over there and hug him.” I looked at him like “Would that be okay?” and he gave me the biggest smile and opened his arms and I hugged him so tight. I'd only hugged him once before, and that had been brief and I was shaking and in awe but this time it was a real hug, he hugged me back tight, too. I love him so much.
James' dad was right behind him and while we were hugging he gave me this huge grin and I smiled and said “Hey, Dad!” really quick and he grinned wider and just GAH. I LOVE JAMES AND HIS FATHER AND HIS GIRLFRIEND AND THEY'RE JUST SO DAMN NICE, ALL OF THEM.
So we said goodbye and made our way out of the stage area, we were all kind of awestruck but I was like “Did you guys hear what he just said? He's doing Figure It Out tomorrow, we have to find a way to be here.” Neither of them could, and I didn't think I could, either, but my mind was already working on the problem.
The girls didn't want to leave the lot, Melissa was walking really slow and she was in this daze and she was like “Just let me savor this” and I'm like “Come on, we have to get to my phone I need my phone!” I wanted to tweet the FIO girls and tell them about James, because I thought they said they were going Saturday but I couldn't remember. We said goodbye to Kendall's house again and almost got lost finding our way out, and when I saw the woman who had let us in sitting on a bench with her co-workers I approached and thanked her. I told her it was Maral's birthday and she got to talk to one of her favorite stars and it wouldn't have been possible without her. Maral went up and hugged every one of them, kept saying “Thank you so much this is the best birthday ever” and the woman was like “Awww, I'm so happy it worked out.” She was so nice.
We finally got back to the car and I tweeted a couple of the girls to tell them James was going to be there and they freaked out, of course. They were planning to go. Melissa and Maral dropped me off and I got on my laptop and yes, there were tickets available for FIO on Saturday. I started making phone calls, trying to figure out a way to get home if I left in the afternoon instead of the evening because the buses don't run by my house past seven. I was willing to take a bus to my work and wait for someone to get off and run me home, there are at least five or six who would do that for me. Of course none of those were working Saturday night. Finally got hold of the roommate and begged her, said I would take the city bus to the mall if she could pick me up from there, and she agreed when I explained to her why. She is the best, I swear.
So once again, I went out at like eleven o'clock at night to print tickets for FIO. Three nights in a row I did this haha. Thank God for Fed Ex/Kinko's. Open all night.
While I was out Amber called me and my phone was dangerously close to completely dying so it was a quick conversation but I told her how to find the ticket for FIO and she made it happen, saying a friend was going to bring her. I was happy, I'd get to meet Amber finally!
I ate a granola bar and tried to heat up some microwave popcorn. The microwave caught on fire. It was the craziest thing. No damage or anything, I got it out before the fire really got going, but like...okay. So a granola bar was my dinner that night. I showered and went to bed, excited for one more day of James. I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED. I AM SO BLESSED.
I was about to shut down my laptop at about 1 A.M. when I decided to do a quick check of my email. I had a million notifications from Twitter, I suddenly had a lot of followers and had been favorited and retweeted like crazy, and of course there were a few DM's mixed in. I was going through deleting all of them when I noticed one that said “Chris Fabregas has sent you a Direct Message.” I had to read it four times to make sure I was seeing it correctly. HOW HAD I MISSED THAT?
I opened the email and it was Chris asking “Are you on the lot? I'm at stage 25, come say hi!”
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? TWELVE HOURS LATER I'M SEEING THAT? WHAT THE HELL. I was so upset. I could've tackle-hugged Chris Fabregas! I LOVE THAT GUY. GAH I WAS SO UPSET. But oh well, nothing I could do about it then. I tweeted him that I'd just gotten the message and thanked him, said I was sorry I missed him but we did have fun. DAMN.
The last morning I woke up an hour earlier than I'd intended but I couldn't sleep. I knew James would be there but I kept thinking “What if the other guys are there, too?” It could happen. I still wanted Logan. Told myself not to get my hopes up, just be happy with James. And I was, really. James proved to me this week why he is still my favorite after two years, why even though I have my Logan moments I can never completely break away from James. He always pulls me back in. That whole day showed me why. He's a beautiful person.
I had been planning to get down to Paramount at 9:30 but the girls were tweeting at 8:30 they were already there so I packed up and checked out after eating a quick breakfast. The hotel let me leave my bag there until later, thank God for that. I walked down to the studios and met up with the girls again. This time it was Lisa, Stephanie, Dazmin, Nicole, Denise, and another girl I didn't know named Cora (@CoraHavok). Kathleen couldn't make it, I was bummed. But Cora was cool. Amber showed up with a girl named Emily (@EmilyIsSoRandom) who recognized me from the KIIS FM thing in July, she was one of the nice girls with me when James stopped to talk to us. We all exchanged stories about their day at FIO and my day on the tour and at the taping the night before, and basically just killed time. It was so funny, they brought coffee for some of the pages, they knew all the names because they'd been there all week and they were helping the pages and I was like “You guys should just work here.” The pages were all very cool and nice. I liked Jamie, who was sarcastic and called me “sunshine” the first day I was there.
It seemed like forever before they let us in this time, and the anticipation was killing us. My stomach was in knots, I just needed to know who was on the panel. The girls had heard that the guys were doing some “Cupcake Wars” thing later in the day, so we figured if they were going to be on FIO, they'd have to do it in the morning. Which was great, because I couldn't stay for the afternoon one. I prayed and prayed we'd get all four but didn't get my hopes up. I was pretty sure we'd at least get James, and of course my biggest prayer was we'd get Logan as well.
Finally finally finally they let us in and as we were walking into the building one of the girls saw Halston so we knew James was in there. We read the names on the panel and it was James, Carlos, Ciara, Noah, and Hannah. I was screaming, we got James and Carlos! I was so excited, we were all so happy and the producer of the show said to the girls, “See? Your persistence paid off. You finally got your boys.” We were SO excited. Carlos! And James! And James and Carlos! And we didn't know who the panelists would be for the second one but we were hoping for Kendall and Logan, or at least that Carlos and James would stay for that episode, too.
There's no way I'm going to remember everything, so I'll just mention what stands out. Hannah turned out to be a viewer who had won a contest to be on the show. That was new. Noah was Noah Munck, aka Gibby. I was seated in the third row back this time, but actually had a better view than Thursday because of the angle. I was facing Jeff and the contestants, but far enough to the right that I could see the faces of the panelists clearly. The first episode went by fast. Carlos asked the funniest questions, he is so random and apparently obsessed with monkeys. He kept asking about monkeys. James informed us he doesn't even know what crocheting means and when he was laughed at for asking if the contestant crochets something out of tea bags, he made it clear the clue had been tea bags. His way of saying “Look, I'm not an idiot, there's a legitimate reason I'm asking this question.”
During a quick break between filming Joby got on the mic and asked James “How's Ricky Adams today?” I kind of screamed, all excited, because I got the joke and nobody else did. James looked over at me and smiled, nodded and did the eyebrow thing like “Hey, I know you! How are ya?” and yeah. I died. I mouthed “Hi, James” and he smiled again before the action started up. That was like...yeah. I was happy. Life was made.
I also went up to Joby between takes and told him that he'd done a fantastic job the night before at the taping, because it was an older crowd and he had to tell different types of jokes and he did manage to keep us laughing. He was like “Oh, you were there? Yeah, that was a flat audience, wasn't it?” I agreed, because seriously only the three of us showed any enthusiasm at all. We talked about the Tucker kid and laughed and he thanked me for saying that and gave me a hug.
They played a lot of different songs, one of them that gangnam song again and the girls got all excited and Joby told them to go out and dance for us so two of them did, I can't remember which ones. But others joined in and one of the Clue Force III guys was on “So You Think You Can Dance” and he got out there and did it really well. We were dying. It was like a big dance party in that place. They also played that Cha Cha song and at least fifteen girls got out there and did it. Carlos and the security guards were highly amused.
They played a lot of BTR songs, which of course made us all deliriously happy, and we'd stand up and dance and sing and Carlos loved it. James laughed at us a few times but Carlos was really digging it. The D.J. put on “What Makes You Beautiful” and Carlos' face. Like seriously. We turned to look at him and his face. He looked very unhappy, gave this face like “No, this is not happening on my watch” and started shaking his head, did a throat-slashing gesture a few times, and then started booing and doing thumbs down at us, getting us to do it, too. I was actually really surprised. I had no idea his dislike was that strong. One more reason to love Carlos Pena.
Carlos and James came down to the demo table with one of the contestants, so they were closer to us for a while. Carlos made us laugh again, and then that episode was over. The panelists took off and while we were waiting to leave they put up the names for the next panel. Matt, Carlos, James, and Ciara. We got Carlos and James again, and what I hoped was Matt Bennett.
We waited outside for a while, got some water and used the restroom and talked, and eventually they took us back in. I was in the top row this time because they had all the little kids sit in front for this episode and pushed us older “kids” to the back. So we were all in back, but the view was still good. I kicked my purse under the seats, not realizing there was an opening beneath the top row, and had to lay down to reach it. Thank God there was a stack of equipment just underneath me or it would've hit the ground.
What's there to remember about this episode, besides Carlos asking about monkeys again and being his generally silly self? It was Matt Bennett, who is super funny, and came over to sing for us between takes. The girls kept wanting him to sing “Broken Glass” and he said he cut himself on broken glass the other day so he no longer does that song. Instead he started singing one of his favorites, “The Lady in Red.” Only me and Denise seemed to know the song and we sang along with him, then he came up the stairs and rushed through to sit between us. He held the mic in front of me and I blanked, like... “Uh what? No no, sing with Denise!” He's like “No, the song. Listen.” I was so flustered, I mean GAH ROBARAZZI SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME SINGING. I finally caught on that the D.J. was playing the actual song and said “Oh!” really loud and I felt so stupid and started to sing then, and Denise and I were singing but he had to go rush back to the set then.
Later Jeff came over to talk to us and someone yelled out “Pick Boy!” and he goes “No. No no no.” He started to tell us about how he knew Pick Boy and they were friends and how Pick Boy saved Joby's life one time by helping him decide between a watermelon and a....something else? I don't even remember. But he told us stories about Pick Boy and that was awesome I mean PICK BOY TALKING TO US ABOUT PICK BOY AS IF HE'S SOMEONE ELSE AND HE WAS LIKE EMBARRASSED ABOUT IT BUT I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
Matt was asking for theme show songs to sing and someone (Denise, maybe?) wanted him to sing the “Doug” theme song and he's like “There aren't any words to that.” so someone yelled out “Rocko's Modern Life” and he sang that, it was funny how well he did it.
The first contestants on that one were amazing. Just amazing. They blew us all away with their talent. Even James, Carlos, and Ciara were staring in awe. Carlos' face was glued to them. Well, I think everyone's was. Everyone was so quiet, we just kept gasping and whispering things like “Oh my god” and “Wow” and just WOW when you guys see it you're going to be awestruck. I hope it comes off as awesome on T.V. as it did in person because really, that's some talent. After the show was over I saw James talking to them and you could tell he was saying how impressed he was, that they were so good. I want to see more of their talent. But Logan really should've been there for that. You'll understand when you see it.
For the second contestant things seemed to get crazy. James popped off with “Did you train a goat to milk itself?” He can be such a sarcastic little bitch sometimes. I love him. There was just so much slime and other liquids and it got wild up there and before they started the round, Carlos and James rolled up their towels and shoved them inside their jumpsuits to keep the slime from going down inside. James was very careful in putting on his goggles and hat, and when it started he and Carlos were like “We're ready for this. We're prepared.” They actually said that to Jeff. So it goes along and suddenly a blast of slime so strong comes out, it knocked James' hat off his head. He got drenched. I think it went up his nose, too, because you could tell he was trying to get it out and he was not happy. James was not happy. We were commenting on it, how pissed off he was, he was like really really angry but containing it. He put the goggles on his head and wiped off his face and tried to clean up but it was everywhere. He stood up and yelled at the contestant “I can't wait until someone guesses that surprise word!” Oh my god, he was just raging. Less than a minute later someone guessed it and she got slimed and James jumped up out of his seat screaming “Yes! Yes! You deserved that!” or something and we were like “Wow, James, wow.” And then one of the clues was cottage cheese getting blasted all over them and it was such a mess up there. Such a mess. They stopped filming for a while to clean it up and Carlos walked away but James stood up and let the mess drip off him, he kept running his hands down the front of his suit to squeeze the slime off and I was like “James, will you please stop running your hands over your chest?” Things he does that kill us. Then he worked on his hair, got it into this mohawk thing but it was still dripping down on his face so he finally did it, did what Stephanie and I had been wanting him to do the whole time. He ran his hand up into his bangs and shoved them back. Elyse will know why that is so amazing. We were dying. He looked so damn good. But he spent an extremely long time getting himself cleaned up and getting his hair to work and getting all the slime off (as best he could) and just grooming himself. Cora called him “Princess James.” He sat down finally and not even a minute later Carlos snuck up behind him and dumped his hat full of slime over James' head. We couldn't believe it, we all gasped and I thought James was going to lose it. I thought Carlos was dead this time. The look on James' face. We waited for him to go off but he finally had this “Really?” look on his face and Carlos took off. James was resigned then.
Carlos came back pretty quick holding up a towel for him and pressed the towel to his face, cleaning it and then running his hands through James' hair for longer than was necessary. It was awesome. James cleaned his face while Carlos rubbed his hair and just yeah. Wonderful moment. You could tell Carlos felt bad for what he'd done. A little later they hugged and yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. Wonderful moment.
I think that's about all there is to say about the second episode. The girls had wanted to show James and Carlos their tattoos and the producer said he would try to make it happen, so after it was over he came and got them and told them to stand on the floor, then he went over and got James and Carlos. They showed off their BTR tattoos while James and Carlos were properly impressed and touched, then hugged the girls before having to do pictures and stuff with the contestants. That had been their goal, so I was happy for them. They started leading us out and it was a while before I made it through the door, having been separated from everyone, but I did get to see James and Carlos one last time before disappearing. James smiled at me and I was happy about that, too.
We all met up again outside and screamed and flailed and were so excited to have been there and met each other and it was a really really fun few days of BTR. Amber and Emily left, I hugged them both, and then said goodbye to the rest of the crew. I didn't want to leave, the girls were staying for the afternoon taping and I wanted to so badly. But I had to leave or I wouldn't have gotten home that night.
I picked up my bag from the hotel and then took two buses to the Greyhound station, killed time there and finally was on my way home. And I was so depressed. It had started setting in before I even reached the hotel, I was so sad to be leaving it all behind. I'm so lucky to have had these opportunities and the way things just worked out is amazing, I got so much more out of this trip than I had ever imagined I would. There was definitely a reason my concert was canceled. For me, the reason was all of this. I got something so much more incredible instead. I still can't believe it.
It all feels like a dream. And funnily enough, Ras did do the show. He did it Saturday night, while I was on the way home. I was so mad, I knew he'd do that I just knew it. Because Logan slips by me every time. I can't seem to catch him no matter what I do. And what I realized quickly was that I didn't need Logan. I thought back over my three days in Hollywood and everything I'd experienced, all that time in James' presence. A lot of time in Carlos', as well. Had Logan even been at Ras' little DJ thing, I might've gotten two minutes out of him. If that. Probably more like thirty seconds. It just doesn't compare to what I ended up with, which was so much James I could hardly stand it. I can't complain about a single thing from this week. Not one thing. I met awesome Rushers (one who even lives in the next city over), I hung out with other Rushers I love but never get to see, I met Halston and James' dad and Scott Baio and then there's James. James. I can't explain what he does to me. How I feel just being in his presence. I am so blessed.
Thank you Maral, Melissa, Amber, Emily, Lisa, Stephanie, Kathleen, Dazmin, Nicole, Denise, and Cora for the most fun week I've ever had. You guys made it so much more awesome. Thank you James Maslow for being you and being amazing. I don't expect to do anything else BTR this year, I know they have a long and well-deserved vacation coming up and recording an album and they don't even shoot until January. So this was my last big thing of the year, and it was the best. I never say never, though, because something else might come up. I've learned with these boys miracles happen if you follow your gut. Apparently my gut leads me to James Maslow.
I'm not complaining. :)