Rules to Live By (if You Want to Wear High Heels)
This is very straightforward and presented according to my life experience; read the title, if you missed it.
1) No matter what else you do or don't do, Bring a Pair of Backup Shoes!! Really -- this matters. When you go to your evening, have with you (even if you leave them in the car) a pair of shoes which is NOT your primary pair (I look for flats, but honestly, another pair of heels will usually do) which goes with your outfit but hits a different set of pressure points in your feet. This will save you, later in the evening.
2) Add ball-of-foot pads to your high-heeled shoes. Not the gel ones -- they don't compress enough to really help (also gel can't be worn under bare feet -- they get slippery). Don't be too proud: what you want are "Silver Lining" foam pads -- sold wherever shoes for exotic dancers are sold -- and they're cheap. Don't be embarrassed, just find your local shop which supplies the dancers, and you will find these pads. They can be transferred from shoes to shoes, because they do not permanently adhere, and are truly Worth The Price. ($5 or less per pair) (If you ask me where I learned about these, I may have to kill you. But I will answer.)
3) Buy shoes which are comfortable. This is an area in which technology (or sympathy) has TRULY advanced in the last twenty years; today's 3" (or higher) heels are no longer built solely (no pun intended) to look good; it is now actually possible to have comfortable high heeled shoes. (How do I know that there is a modern difference? I have LOTS of vintage shoes. They are pretty, yes, but OH do they hurt. And I took ballet -- I know from sore feet.)
Don't skimp on cost -- there is a huge difference between $29 dress shoes and $69 dress shoes. Think of it as a necessary health expense; this is the part of your outfit which will make THE most difference in how much you enjoy your evening -- because if you can't walk comfortably after an hour or two, you're going to have problems (yes, this is why you bring backup shoes, but wouldn't it be nice to not need them until it's time to go home?). Payless Shoes may look the same as those Jessica Simpson (brand) heels from Macy's, but they do NOT wear the same. The difference is in materials and construction; better padding, real leather uppers (which will mold to your foot with wear) instead of man-made (read "plastic" -- which will not adjust to your feet or last as long), and better design overall. Buy Nine West, Jessica Simpson, Aldo, Enzo Angiolini, or similar brands from department stores; it will make the difference after you have (bravely! go you!) been in the things for three hours or more.
(Also, if you're willing to spend the extra money for quality shoes now, you will be less likely to throw them in the Goodwill bag with a "good riddance!" after one wearing -- only to find that you have to go shoe shopping again next time you dress up. Easy mathematics on that one.)
Shopping: if you hate shopping and only want to make one stop, go to DSW -- but you will probably wind up paying more than if you cruise the mall and check sales at the shoe shops and department stores. If you happen to think in advance, check thrift stores from time to time; some of my best shoes were $4.99 (for brands named above) and hey, already broken in! (Most high heeled dress shoes aren't worn very often, so get to thrift stores with very little ickyness.)
Endnote: the part of your outfit which OTHERS will notice if you skimp on cost is your underwear. Really. Buy something specifically to go with what you are wearing, if it is a special once-in-a-lifetime event -- your wedding, your child's wedding, senior prom, etc. (I've seen some lovely dresses ruined because the women wearing them didn't get Spanx -- our modern evolution of "granny undies," much more comfortable and invisible and SO worth the cost -- to go underneath, and had...bulges.) Buy Spanx brand (Von Maur carries them) because they stay in place better than the cheaper versions, and who wants to be going into the bathroom to adjust underwear all the time? Double-sided sticky tape specifically for holding clothing in place, readily available at department stores and (oddly) JoAnn Fabrics, is a good idea as well to keep undies from riding up or down.
Do I follow my own fashion advice? Oh yes. (What, you thought I was just making that Fashion Police stuff up? Nope -- really truly.) If you do it right, no one will notice what's making you walk confidently and look good in your outfit -- they'll just see you, looking wonderful and having fun. Isn't that the whole point?
1) No matter what else you do or don't do, Bring a Pair of Backup Shoes!! Really -- this matters. When you go to your evening, have with you (even if you leave them in the car) a pair of shoes which is NOT your primary pair (I look for flats, but honestly, another pair of heels will usually do) which goes with your outfit but hits a different set of pressure points in your feet. This will save you, later in the evening.
2) Add ball-of-foot pads to your high-heeled shoes. Not the gel ones -- they don't compress enough to really help (also gel can't be worn under bare feet -- they get slippery). Don't be too proud: what you want are "Silver Lining" foam pads -- sold wherever shoes for exotic dancers are sold -- and they're cheap. Don't be embarrassed, just find your local shop which supplies the dancers, and you will find these pads. They can be transferred from shoes to shoes, because they do not permanently adhere, and are truly Worth The Price. ($5 or less per pair) (If you ask me where I learned about these, I may have to kill you. But I will answer.)
3) Buy shoes which are comfortable. This is an area in which technology (or sympathy) has TRULY advanced in the last twenty years; today's 3" (or higher) heels are no longer built solely (no pun intended) to look good; it is now actually possible to have comfortable high heeled shoes. (How do I know that there is a modern difference? I have LOTS of vintage shoes. They are pretty, yes, but OH do they hurt. And I took ballet -- I know from sore feet.)
Don't skimp on cost -- there is a huge difference between $29 dress shoes and $69 dress shoes. Think of it as a necessary health expense; this is the part of your outfit which will make THE most difference in how much you enjoy your evening -- because if you can't walk comfortably after an hour or two, you're going to have problems (yes, this is why you bring backup shoes, but wouldn't it be nice to not need them until it's time to go home?). Payless Shoes may look the same as those Jessica Simpson (brand) heels from Macy's, but they do NOT wear the same. The difference is in materials and construction; better padding, real leather uppers (which will mold to your foot with wear) instead of man-made (read "plastic" -- which will not adjust to your feet or last as long), and better design overall. Buy Nine West, Jessica Simpson, Aldo, Enzo Angiolini, or similar brands from department stores; it will make the difference after you have (bravely! go you!) been in the things for three hours or more.
(Also, if you're willing to spend the extra money for quality shoes now, you will be less likely to throw them in the Goodwill bag with a "good riddance!" after one wearing -- only to find that you have to go shoe shopping again next time you dress up. Easy mathematics on that one.)
Shopping: if you hate shopping and only want to make one stop, go to DSW -- but you will probably wind up paying more than if you cruise the mall and check sales at the shoe shops and department stores. If you happen to think in advance, check thrift stores from time to time; some of my best shoes were $4.99 (for brands named above) and hey, already broken in! (Most high heeled dress shoes aren't worn very often, so get to thrift stores with very little ickyness.)
Endnote: the part of your outfit which OTHERS will notice if you skimp on cost is your underwear. Really. Buy something specifically to go with what you are wearing, if it is a special once-in-a-lifetime event -- your wedding, your child's wedding, senior prom, etc. (I've seen some lovely dresses ruined because the women wearing them didn't get Spanx -- our modern evolution of "granny undies," much more comfortable and invisible and SO worth the cost -- to go underneath, and had...bulges.) Buy Spanx brand (Von Maur carries them) because they stay in place better than the cheaper versions, and who wants to be going into the bathroom to adjust underwear all the time? Double-sided sticky tape specifically for holding clothing in place, readily available at department stores and (oddly) JoAnn Fabrics, is a good idea as well to keep undies from riding up or down.
Do I follow my own fashion advice? Oh yes. (What, you thought I was just making that Fashion Police stuff up? Nope -- really truly.) If you do it right, no one will notice what's making you walk confidently and look good in your outfit -- they'll just see you, looking wonderful and having fun. Isn't that the whole point?