Gnargxlatomoratron
Title: Gnargxlatomoratron
Author: saturn_necklace/stormy_words
Pairing: Ohno/Nino
Word count: 1,520
Rating: PG
Genre: AU, Crack.
Warnings: British English.
Summary: Ohno is a gnargxlatomoratron (A wiggly blue monster) in search of friends. Nino is SuperNino, a superhero who no one likes because he's sarcastic and mean.
AN: My mind astounds me with it's strangeness sometimes. This somehow came from a conversation with sunrisecandy. Enjoy?
Scream. Shriek. Cry. That was all Ohno ever heard; frankly, he was getting rather tired of it. Slowly he reached out a fluorescent blue tentacle and sighed; he hated being trapped in this body - it led to a lonely existence.
All Ohno had ever wanted was friends, but every time he tried to talk to a human they ran away screaming; life was hard for a gnargxlatomoratron - for starters, no one could even say the name of his species properly. All he could do was wiggle aimlessly through various towns and cities, hoping that a kindly human would stop screaming long enough to have a conversation, and realise that Ohno way actually a pretty nice guy - who certainly didn’t want to eat anyone.
Unfortunately, that had yet to happen - and Ohno was starting to doubt that it ever would; humans could be hostile. As he wiggled down another street, only to be welcomed by more blood curdling shrieks, Ohno sighed and stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t be bothered to keep going if they were all going to treat him like this. After a quick glance to make sure there was no one behind him (he doubted that there would, everyone ran away so quickly), and after taking the effort to nudge a few cars out of his way with a long wavy tentacle, he sat down, his body taking up a good proportion of the road.
Somehow, Ohno suspected that people wouldn’t be nearly as terrified if he wasn’t quite as huge as he was - although they would almost certainly still be scared. He wasn’t even a big gnargxlatomoratron - in fact he was rather small - but he supposed that the humans didn’t know that, and therefore couldn’t really be blamed. Even so, he would’ve liked the ridiculous amounts of fear he seemed to incite in people to at least reduce a little.
After a few minutes of regaining the mental strength to continue on his search for friends, Ohno stood up and wiggled his way onto the next street - not before nudging the cars back into their proper places. It seemed as though everyone had retreated from the streets and hidden inside; they always did once word of him got around; every place he visited was the same. He would wiggle for a while, as people screamed in terror and ran away, and then not too long after, he would find the streets deserted, leaving him only to move on to the next place.
Somehow no one had ever seemed to notice that as he made his way through a town or city he never left a mess. Every car and bus and tree and building was left undisturbed. It hurt Ohno to think that no one ever thought about his good sides.
It was as Ohno was pondering this that something happened. Something unexpected and highly unusual - in fact, it had never happened before.
He heard a voice.
It wasn’t a screaming voice, or one that showed even the remotest bit of terror. It was sarcastic, and calm, and vaguely amused, and Ohno broke out in a wide grin as he turned around.
“People don’t like you much either, huh?”
In front of him was a man. Clearly, he wasn’t a normal man, because he was hovering right in front of Ohno’s face, and from Ohno’s experience humans didn’t usually hover or float or fly.
“No.” Ohno answered simply with a sad sigh. “They all seem terrified of me.”
The man raised an eyebrow in some sort of amusement and his voice took on that sarcastic quality which Ohno found so refreshing. “I wonder why.”
“It might be because I’m a gnargxlatomoratron.” Ohno mused, reaching out a tentacle to the other. “I’m Ohno, by the way.”
“Really, you think?” The man reached out a hand to shake Ohno’s tentacle, and Ohno’s grin widened. “I’m Ninomiya. People call me SuperNino though.”
Ohno surveyed Nino’s appearance and nodded in understanding. “I take it you’re a superhero then?” The strange yellow cape around Nino’s shoulders and the fact that the other was flying were the main factors in Ohno’s conclusion, and he was proven to be correct as Nino nodded, releasing Ohno’s tentacle.
“Not the most popular superhero ever though.” Nino explained, adjusting his cape. “People seem to think I’m mean or something. Personally, I think the least they can do in return for being saved from fires or falling to their death is put up with a bit of sarcasm and teasing.”
Ohno nodded in agreement. “That seems fair.”
“I mean, it’s their own fault if they climb onto a roof and get stuck up there, they deserve a bit of teasing for it; it stops them from doing it again, which makes my job easier.”
Ohno nodded again, and then sighed. “At least they don’t scream at you. This is the first conversation I’ve had since… Well. Since before I became a gnargxlatomoratron. Usually people just run away.”
Nino raised an eyebrow, curious. “You weren’t always a gnargxlatomoratron?”
Ohno shook his head, the sad look from his face momentarily disappearing as he realised something. “You said it right! No one can ever say it right.” He smiled dreamily for a few moments before turning his attention back to the topic on hand. “I wasn’t. I used to be a human but then stuff happened, and now I’m like this.”
“Stuff happened? How eloquent.” Nino smirked in amusement. He found himself somewhat intrigued by Ohno; the other didn’t seem to mind his sarcastic tone - he almost seemed to like it - and he had a lovable vagueness in his explanations.
Ohno nodded, smiling again at the sarcastic tone. He thought he could get used to this - sarcasm was so much better than fearful screaming. After a few moments of thought, he spoke again. “SuperNino, what would you say to being my friend?”
Nino couldn’t help but laugh - the sound of it was music to Ohno’s ears; he hadn’t heard someone laugh in years. “Do you usually ask that sort of thing?”
Ohno shook his head “Usually everyone’s already disappeared before I can ask. So, what do you say?”
“Sure, why not.” Nino smiled, the grin that had spread over Ohno’s face was highly infectious - not that Nino really minded
And with that they made their way out of the town, Nino sat on Ohno’s shoulder as the blue gnargxlatomoratron wiggled away.
The conversation was the start of a beautiful friendship, and was something that Ohno classed as one of the best things to ever happen in his life. They quickly grew used to each other’s quirks, Ohno’s adoration for Nino’s sarcasm only growing, and Nino gaining a love for Ohno’s distant tone and strangely adorable mannerisms.
It was after a year of travelling together, with no particular aim, that they discovered that their feelings for each other had become more than just a love for friends. As they sat together one night, Nino decided to act on things.
“Ohno, I want to kiss you.”
Ohno looked over at Nino, blinking a couple of times before nodding. “Okay.”
“Good.” Nino said, flying up to sit on Ohno’s shoulder. “This won’t turn me into a gnargxlatomoratron or anything, will it?”
Ohno shook his head “No. Does it seem like it would?”
Nino shrugged, floating a little higher. “I just figured I should check. I thought it would be nice to know before I turned blue and started growing tentacles; less surprising, you know?”
“You’d still want to kiss me if you knew you’d become like me?”
Nino shrugged again. “Well, yeah, I guess.”
Ohno grinned, and Nino leaned forward to press his lips against Ohno’s surprisingly soft cheek.
It was as Nino pulled away that it happened. Ohno’s skin began to change in colour and his tentacles began to disappear. Gradually he began to transform, until he was left lying on the floor, no longer a gnargxlatomoratron. He was a man again.
Nino stared at him silently for a few moments before bursting into laughter. “Seriously? Seriously?”
Ohno blinked and looked down at his arm before breaking out into a grin. “They never said this would happen.”
Nino snorted in amusement. “What, are you like a handsome prince whose wicked stepmother turned into a monster because she was jealous?”
Ohno shook his head and shrugged. “Actually, I just got caught in alien crossfire in my hometown and they ended up turning me into one of them.”
Nino raised an eyebrow. “Well, at least that’s not quite so clichéd.”
“I know, right?” Ohno grinned, standing up and walking over to Nino. He reached out a hand to take hold of the other’s, lacing their fingers together. “I haven’t been able to do this in years.” He grinned excitedly.
Nino rolled his eyes. “Are we going to spend the next year rediscovering all the things you can do again?”
Ohno nodded enthusiastically. “Absolutely.”
Nino smirked and leaned in to press his lips against Ohno’s. “I guess we’d better start now then.”
Author: saturn_necklace/stormy_words
Pairing: Ohno/Nino
Word count: 1,520
Rating: PG
Genre: AU, Crack.
Warnings: British English.
Summary: Ohno is a gnargxlatomoratron (A wiggly blue monster) in search of friends. Nino is SuperNino, a superhero who no one likes because he's sarcastic and mean.
AN: My mind astounds me with it's strangeness sometimes. This somehow came from a conversation with sunrisecandy. Enjoy?
Scream. Shriek. Cry. That was all Ohno ever heard; frankly, he was getting rather tired of it. Slowly he reached out a fluorescent blue tentacle and sighed; he hated being trapped in this body - it led to a lonely existence.
All Ohno had ever wanted was friends, but every time he tried to talk to a human they ran away screaming; life was hard for a gnargxlatomoratron - for starters, no one could even say the name of his species properly. All he could do was wiggle aimlessly through various towns and cities, hoping that a kindly human would stop screaming long enough to have a conversation, and realise that Ohno way actually a pretty nice guy - who certainly didn’t want to eat anyone.
Unfortunately, that had yet to happen - and Ohno was starting to doubt that it ever would; humans could be hostile. As he wiggled down another street, only to be welcomed by more blood curdling shrieks, Ohno sighed and stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t be bothered to keep going if they were all going to treat him like this. After a quick glance to make sure there was no one behind him (he doubted that there would, everyone ran away so quickly), and after taking the effort to nudge a few cars out of his way with a long wavy tentacle, he sat down, his body taking up a good proportion of the road.
Somehow, Ohno suspected that people wouldn’t be nearly as terrified if he wasn’t quite as huge as he was - although they would almost certainly still be scared. He wasn’t even a big gnargxlatomoratron - in fact he was rather small - but he supposed that the humans didn’t know that, and therefore couldn’t really be blamed. Even so, he would’ve liked the ridiculous amounts of fear he seemed to incite in people to at least reduce a little.
After a few minutes of regaining the mental strength to continue on his search for friends, Ohno stood up and wiggled his way onto the next street - not before nudging the cars back into their proper places. It seemed as though everyone had retreated from the streets and hidden inside; they always did once word of him got around; every place he visited was the same. He would wiggle for a while, as people screamed in terror and ran away, and then not too long after, he would find the streets deserted, leaving him only to move on to the next place.
Somehow no one had ever seemed to notice that as he made his way through a town or city he never left a mess. Every car and bus and tree and building was left undisturbed. It hurt Ohno to think that no one ever thought about his good sides.
It was as Ohno was pondering this that something happened. Something unexpected and highly unusual - in fact, it had never happened before.
He heard a voice.
It wasn’t a screaming voice, or one that showed even the remotest bit of terror. It was sarcastic, and calm, and vaguely amused, and Ohno broke out in a wide grin as he turned around.
“People don’t like you much either, huh?”
In front of him was a man. Clearly, he wasn’t a normal man, because he was hovering right in front of Ohno’s face, and from Ohno’s experience humans didn’t usually hover or float or fly.
“No.” Ohno answered simply with a sad sigh. “They all seem terrified of me.”
The man raised an eyebrow in some sort of amusement and his voice took on that sarcastic quality which Ohno found so refreshing. “I wonder why.”
“It might be because I’m a gnargxlatomoratron.” Ohno mused, reaching out a tentacle to the other. “I’m Ohno, by the way.”
“Really, you think?” The man reached out a hand to shake Ohno’s tentacle, and Ohno’s grin widened. “I’m Ninomiya. People call me SuperNino though.”
Ohno surveyed Nino’s appearance and nodded in understanding. “I take it you’re a superhero then?” The strange yellow cape around Nino’s shoulders and the fact that the other was flying were the main factors in Ohno’s conclusion, and he was proven to be correct as Nino nodded, releasing Ohno’s tentacle.
“Not the most popular superhero ever though.” Nino explained, adjusting his cape. “People seem to think I’m mean or something. Personally, I think the least they can do in return for being saved from fires or falling to their death is put up with a bit of sarcasm and teasing.”
Ohno nodded in agreement. “That seems fair.”
“I mean, it’s their own fault if they climb onto a roof and get stuck up there, they deserve a bit of teasing for it; it stops them from doing it again, which makes my job easier.”
Ohno nodded again, and then sighed. “At least they don’t scream at you. This is the first conversation I’ve had since… Well. Since before I became a gnargxlatomoratron. Usually people just run away.”
Nino raised an eyebrow, curious. “You weren’t always a gnargxlatomoratron?”
Ohno shook his head, the sad look from his face momentarily disappearing as he realised something. “You said it right! No one can ever say it right.” He smiled dreamily for a few moments before turning his attention back to the topic on hand. “I wasn’t. I used to be a human but then stuff happened, and now I’m like this.”
“Stuff happened? How eloquent.” Nino smirked in amusement. He found himself somewhat intrigued by Ohno; the other didn’t seem to mind his sarcastic tone - he almost seemed to like it - and he had a lovable vagueness in his explanations.
Ohno nodded, smiling again at the sarcastic tone. He thought he could get used to this - sarcasm was so much better than fearful screaming. After a few moments of thought, he spoke again. “SuperNino, what would you say to being my friend?”
Nino couldn’t help but laugh - the sound of it was music to Ohno’s ears; he hadn’t heard someone laugh in years. “Do you usually ask that sort of thing?”
Ohno shook his head “Usually everyone’s already disappeared before I can ask. So, what do you say?”
“Sure, why not.” Nino smiled, the grin that had spread over Ohno’s face was highly infectious - not that Nino really minded
And with that they made their way out of the town, Nino sat on Ohno’s shoulder as the blue gnargxlatomoratron wiggled away.
The conversation was the start of a beautiful friendship, and was something that Ohno classed as one of the best things to ever happen in his life. They quickly grew used to each other’s quirks, Ohno’s adoration for Nino’s sarcasm only growing, and Nino gaining a love for Ohno’s distant tone and strangely adorable mannerisms.
It was after a year of travelling together, with no particular aim, that they discovered that their feelings for each other had become more than just a love for friends. As they sat together one night, Nino decided to act on things.
“Ohno, I want to kiss you.”
Ohno looked over at Nino, blinking a couple of times before nodding. “Okay.”
“Good.” Nino said, flying up to sit on Ohno’s shoulder. “This won’t turn me into a gnargxlatomoratron or anything, will it?”
Ohno shook his head “No. Does it seem like it would?”
Nino shrugged, floating a little higher. “I just figured I should check. I thought it would be nice to know before I turned blue and started growing tentacles; less surprising, you know?”
“You’d still want to kiss me if you knew you’d become like me?”
Nino shrugged again. “Well, yeah, I guess.”
Ohno grinned, and Nino leaned forward to press his lips against Ohno’s surprisingly soft cheek.
It was as Nino pulled away that it happened. Ohno’s skin began to change in colour and his tentacles began to disappear. Gradually he began to transform, until he was left lying on the floor, no longer a gnargxlatomoratron. He was a man again.
Nino stared at him silently for a few moments before bursting into laughter. “Seriously? Seriously?”
Ohno blinked and looked down at his arm before breaking out into a grin. “They never said this would happen.”
Nino snorted in amusement. “What, are you like a handsome prince whose wicked stepmother turned into a monster because she was jealous?”
Ohno shook his head and shrugged. “Actually, I just got caught in alien crossfire in my hometown and they ended up turning me into one of them.”
Nino raised an eyebrow. “Well, at least that’s not quite so clichéd.”
“I know, right?” Ohno grinned, standing up and walking over to Nino. He reached out a hand to take hold of the other’s, lacing their fingers together. “I haven’t been able to do this in years.” He grinned excitedly.
Nino rolled his eyes. “Are we going to spend the next year rediscovering all the things you can do again?”
Ohno nodded enthusiastically. “Absolutely.”
Nino smirked and leaned in to press his lips against Ohno’s. “I guess we’d better start now then.”