Short story: A message from Johnny Smith
I was doing a little work on the next chapter, and then this short little thing jumped into my head, so I just churned it out. Full disclosure (and possibly too much information): I thought of it while having to unclog the toilet. Isn't it nice to have sims there to occupy your mind while dealing with the more unpleasant necessities of life? Anyway, Johnny feels my pain. I can always feel better knowing that Johnny is there to arch a brow on my behalf.
It's been brought to my attention that some of you think of me as a rather uptight guy.
This is not entirely true.
Now, I'll be the first to admit that I can be very exacting, and even a bit of a perfectionist, but I'm not a total drag.
I'm pretty easygoing, really. It's just that, more often than not, you see me when I'm irritated.
Some people are just hard to live with, inciting rage in the nicest of people.
No, I'm not pointing any fingers. Really, I'm not.
Ripp?
Now, I didn't say that, did I?
Anyway... some people like to leave the bathroom in an unholy mess.
This doesn't bother me. Not at all.
I really don't mind cleaning the bathroom.
I mean, who doesn't like scrubbing the toilet, right?
Some people also like to announce the details of their bathroom usage, even though this may be viewed as too much information by others.
"If you need me, I'll be taking a dump."
"Gotta go take a smash."
"I'm going to go drop the kids off at the pool."
"Looks like it's time to rock the porcelain again."
Those things are always very useful to know.
These same people NEVER seem to flush the toilet properly, and it often ends up clogged.
Do they offer to unclog it? No.
Do they bitch and whine when I suggest that they do it? Of course they do.
Some people always seem to have an excuse, like my personal favourite: the sore wrist.
I can think of a suggestion or two to help prevent that one, if you get my meaning.
In fact, that's a whole other complaint about cleaning the shower, right there.
These same people often protest, "How do you know that it was me?"
I don't think I need to explain that one, right? Despite what some people may think, I do not have amnesia.
And another thing...
Some people have a knack for breaking everything they touch.
Again, I'm not referring to anyone in particular here.
Some people also like to sing and whistle annoying songs.
They like to do it loudly.
They like to do it a lot.
I don't think I'm being that unreasonable, am I? Surely, anyone would find that annoying.
So, you see what I have to put up with, and why I may sometimes seem like the world's biggest killjoy. This stuff just gets irritating in large does, and someone has to stay sensible and make sure the house doesn't fall apart, right?
So why do I put up with it at all?
That's a really good question.
I guess I'm just a glutton for punishment.
It's been brought to my attention that some of you think of me as a rather uptight guy.
This is not entirely true.
Now, I'll be the first to admit that I can be very exacting, and even a bit of a perfectionist, but I'm not a total drag.
I'm pretty easygoing, really. It's just that, more often than not, you see me when I'm irritated.
Some people are just hard to live with, inciting rage in the nicest of people.
No, I'm not pointing any fingers. Really, I'm not.
Ripp?
Now, I didn't say that, did I?
Anyway... some people like to leave the bathroom in an unholy mess.
This doesn't bother me. Not at all.
I really don't mind cleaning the bathroom.
I mean, who doesn't like scrubbing the toilet, right?
Some people also like to announce the details of their bathroom usage, even though this may be viewed as too much information by others.
"If you need me, I'll be taking a dump."
"Gotta go take a smash."
"I'm going to go drop the kids off at the pool."
"Looks like it's time to rock the porcelain again."
Those things are always very useful to know.
These same people NEVER seem to flush the toilet properly, and it often ends up clogged.
Do they offer to unclog it? No.
Do they bitch and whine when I suggest that they do it? Of course they do.
Some people always seem to have an excuse, like my personal favourite: the sore wrist.
I can think of a suggestion or two to help prevent that one, if you get my meaning.
In fact, that's a whole other complaint about cleaning the shower, right there.
These same people often protest, "How do you know that it was me?"
I don't think I need to explain that one, right? Despite what some people may think, I do not have amnesia.
And another thing...
Some people have a knack for breaking everything they touch.
Again, I'm not referring to anyone in particular here.
Some people also like to sing and whistle annoying songs.
They like to do it loudly.
They like to do it a lot.
I don't think I'm being that unreasonable, am I? Surely, anyone would find that annoying.
So, you see what I have to put up with, and why I may sometimes seem like the world's biggest killjoy. This stuff just gets irritating in large does, and someone has to stay sensible and make sure the house doesn't fall apart, right?
So why do I put up with it at all?
That's a really good question.
I guess I'm just a glutton for punishment.