[ys] this road leads to nowhere [2/2]
Part 1 here
She doesn’t die, of course.
She wakes up to a dark room, and for a moment, she panics when she sees no familiar silhouettes across her, and she wonders if she’s been abandoned. Abandoned by Yong-hwa, by Ji-min, left to die here by the flu. It wasn’t the apocalypse that did me in, or the zombies, but the common flu. She would laugh if it didn’t physically hurt her. Her body feels like it’s been stretched to its limits, which it probably has been over the past few months and for a moment, she lets herself long for a bed, any bed really to rest her bones in.
Yet, she realizes a few seconds later that her head is pillowed in something soft and warm and that something is moving, up and down, up and down in even movements. She closes her eyes. She is leaning on someone. Someone asleep, obviously and that forces her to open her eyes to see who it is.
Her head is balanced in Yong-hwa’s lap, made all the more comfortable by his thick hoodie which has been balled up to act as an interim cushion. He is warm, and strong and alive and for a moment, Joo-hyun lets herself look up in the dark at his sleeping face, letting her imagination fill in the features that she knows, that are now shrouded in shadows.
The serenity of the night is quickly broken a few seconds later, when he jerks awake, turning his neck from side to side to get a crick out of it. He looks down at her before she can close her eyes to feign sleep. “Hey, you’re awake.”
His hand goes to her forehead and it is then that she realizes, she’s not burning up any longer. She still feels a little warmer than usual, still achy all over, but even she can tell that the fever isn’t as bad as before. Yong-hwa seems to feel this too, because he smiles and his relief is evident. “Looks like the medicine helped. Here.”
He helps her sit up, lifting a bottle of water to her lips and she drinks deeply. He tips the bottle a couple of times, indicating that she should drink more, which she does. It is after all, the fastest way to flush out the toxins from one’s body, Joo-hyun remembers and so she ignores all the worry building up in her that they’ll run out of water, that they won’t have enough water to last them, and drinks.
The water tastes good.
When Yong-hwa puts down the bottle, she also realizes that his arm is curved around her back, supporting her, but she doesn’t feel strange or awkward like she normally would. Instead she lets herself lean against him-- she is so tired and heavy and he just feels strong and steady. Her voice is soft when she asks, “Where’s Ji-min?”
Yong-hwa never takes his eyes off her. “She’s outside, standing guard.” He seems to hesitate for a second, but goes on anyway. “We checked you for bite marks while you were out. There was nothing. She’s still a little freaked so I suggested she stand guard tonight while I take care of you.”
Strangely, Joo-hyun cannot muster up any of the earlier bitterness or resentment towards the younger girl. Fear, paranoia-these are necessities in the life after the apocalypse. Caution is what is needed to stay alive, and honestly, if it had been her, she might have done the same as Ji-min. So she only nods, and maybe Yong-hwa can see the exhaustion in her eyes, because he says, “You should rest. Come on.”
Joo-hyun closes her eyes, preparing to be lowered down into the comforting warmth of Yong-hwa’s lap, but right there, out of the blue, she feels it. Yong-hwa’s arm tightens around her shoulder blades, pulling her to him and then, there it is-- Yong-hwa’s lips, lightning quick and pleasantly cold against her hot forehead, but before she can open her eyes, her face is pillowed in his lap again.
“You’ll be fine, Joo-hyun.” Yong-hwa’s voice comes to her out of the dark, soft and gentle. “I’m here and I’ll take care of you. Rest now.”
++++
She gets better and thankfully, so do things between the three of them.
The next day, Ji-min apologizes to her shamefacedly, asking for her forgiveness for overreacting. Joo-hyun extends her hand, gripping the younger girl’s hand to show that she bears her no ill-will, while Yong-hwa watches on with some tired satisfaction.
Maybe its out of some lingering guilt or something else entirely, but Ji-min starts spending more time with Joo-hyun. She spends majority of her days walking alongside Joo-hyun, sharing her water with her, making sure that she is perfectly well after her bout of flu. Joo-hyun also listens intently to Ji-min’s stories of her group of close girlfriends (the friends she was separated from and hopes to catch up with) and the funny thing is that, she no longer feels the differences between her and the younger girl. She can actually relate to having a large group of girlfriends; she used to be the youngest in a huge group of girlfriends, and so she listens, interjecting her own occasional stories about her own friends. It’s nice to think that she and Ji-min actually aren’t as different as she once thought.
If Yong-hwa minds being abandoned like this in favor of girl talk, he doesn’t show it. Sometimes he keeps pace with them, listening to both their stories with a slight smile on his face. Sometimes he jumps in with a joke, which leads to the both of them shooting him looks or smacking him (whoever is closer). Sometimes he just lets them be, and when Joo-hyun looks over her shoulder at him, he just gives her this smile that warms her from the inside out.
Of course, sometimes Ji-min runs out of steam, lagging behind their group and that’s when she finds herself trudging alongside Yong-hwa. Joo-hyun’ll never admit it, but she treasures those periods when she looks up at him and he at her, and the both of them trade a smile that is both familiar and reassuring in spades. It almost reminds her of their time together pre-Ji-min, which she knows is slightly uncharitable to the younger girl, but nonetheless, it’s just nice to have Yong-hwa here with her.
They make Ji-min’s rendevous point early, and spend a couple of days camping around the area when Ji-min’s friends show up.
Their moment of reunion is definitely something to remember.
At the sound of a lone car engine, Ji-min is out of the door like a shot, bounding down to the streets and Yong-hwa and Joo-hyun follow behind. When they reach the doorway of the building, Ji-min is already beside the car, and the two of them watch as a group of girls pile out of the SUV, exchanging hugs and shrieks of joy. Joo-hyun doesn’t even find it in her heart to think of telling them to quieten down in case of drawing zombies to them; she simply smiles as Ji-min throws her arms around a girl with short, blonde-white hair, hiding her face in the girl’s shoulder.
That’s when she feels an arm wrap itself around her own shoulder and she looks up at Yong-hwa who has that strange, fond smile on his face as he looks down at her. Joo-hyun doesn’t even want to fight it; she leans into him, wrapping her own arm around his waist even as the two of them watch the group of friends reunite.
“They’re really pretty.” Joo-hyun comments off-handedly, nestling her head into Yong-hwa’s shoulder, which is as far as shoulders go, pretty comfortable. “Kind of like a group of angels, no?”
It’s true, she thinks, and there’s no intended malice or envy in her words. Just a simple observation, but when she looks up at Yong-hwa, he is not looking at the girls. He is looking at her. He looks like he wants to say something, then seeming to decide against it, he simply tightens his arm around her shoulder blades until her face is pressed against his neck for a brief moment. She breathes in his scent, a masculine, earthy kind of smell that has grown comforting to her.
“Nah,” She hears him disagree, his Adam’s Apple vibrating against her forehead even as he releases her a second later. “I’ve seen prettier.” Joo-hyun looks up at him, but before she can probe further, he nods towards the group. “Shall we go say hi?”
Ji-min is already calling for the pair of them, jumping up and down on the spot like a kid, obviously excited to introduce her friends to them and Joo-hyun has to bite back a smile even as she and Yong-hwa approach them. Ji-min makes the introductions: Choa, Yu-na, Seol-hyun, Hye-jeong, Chan-mi and Mi-na, and there is a flurry of bowing, smiles and handshakes among the two groups.
Even as Yong-hwa is engrossed in sharing one of their more dramatic escapades in the last few weeks to the spellbound group of girls, Ji-min winds a friendly arm around Joo-hyun’s neck. “I’m going to miss you, unnie.”
“Me too.” The words surprise Joo-hyun, but even as she says them, she is aware of how much she means it and she follows up by winding her own arm around the girl’s slim waist. “You take care of yourself, you hear?”
Ji-min nods, and Joo-hyun can already spot tell-tale signs of tears which makes her break out into a fond smile, even as she brushes the tears away from the younger girl’s eyes. “Don’t cry.” She admonishes gently. “You’re finally back with your friends! Just remember to be safe.”
Ji-min nods, sniffing, but she manages a watery smile. “I’d say the same for you unnie, but I think you know that you’re in good hands too.” She nods over at Yong-hwa, who is gesturing widely with his hands to the explosive laughter of the other girls, breathing out a soft sigh. Her next words though are a surprise to Joo-hyun. “You’re lucky, unnie.”
“Why?” Joo-hyun inquires, turning towards her.
Ji-min’s eyes are shiny with the last of her tears, but even so they cannot deter the meaningful look that the younger girl shoots her. “You’re lucky that you have someone who looks at you like that, even now at the end of the world.”
“Looks at me how?” Joo-hyun says, but it is a moot question, she thinks, even as she looks at Yong-hwa. He has paused in the middle of his story to catch her eye, and oh yes, she knows what exactly Ji-min means. Still, Ji-min’s answer makes it real, makes that something softening in her heart real.
“Yong-hwa oppa looks at you like you’re his last and only hope.” Ji-min says simply, squeezing Joo-hyun’s forearm. “He’s only ever had eyes for you.”
Joo-hyun wants to reply, wants to say something that might make what Ji-min has said a little less real, but before she can do anything, the other girls and Yong-hwa are upon them, talking and laughing and that sombre, quiet mood between the two of them is gone. There is a flurry of activity and before she knows it, Ji-min is giving her and Yong-hwa final hugs before getting into the car. Joo-hyun and Yong-hwa stand together as the two of them raise their hands in farewell to the carful of girls, with Ji-min hanging out of the window, waving wildly at them.
When Yong-hwa turns to look at her, her heart does this weird, unexpected jump-- almost like it feels weightless for a minute-- and Joo-hyun hears Ji-min’s words once again in her ears. Yong-hwa oppa looks at you like you’re his last and only hope.
“Just you and me again.” Yong-hwa says ruefully, and Joo-hyun has to quell the sudden, random urge to slip her hand into his. Where is this coming from?
“You and me.” She echoes with a small smile, and Yong-hwa must think that’s the end of their conversation even as he shoots her a lightning quick smile, heading indoors for their stuff to get back on the road. Yet, Joo-hyun stands there for a minute longer. He’s only ever had eyes for you.
Somewhere deep inside her, Joo-hyun thinks that that’s definitely something she could live with.