TF Chapter 8

Jul 28, 2004 21:50

Ok, here it is ( Read more... )

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Comments 78

dairygirl July 28 2004, 16:42:10 UTC
I was thrilled to see the newest chapter up. While I enjoyed the intimate scene between Harry and Draco, you are probably right in saying it isn't for FA. It is so interesting to have the boys see themselves in the future as they are living it. Harry uncovering his obssessiveness and Draco the devestating loss of all his friends to darkness. The letter from Draco to Harry was intense and well-done. Can the two really change the past or will they lose their memory? I am assuming they will get to the past (their true present), but you are the author and only you know.

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klikittyklak July 28 2004, 16:53:55 UTC
Yeah, my first thought was that it was too graphic, but then I thought about some others that I've read on FA and I think it might be alright.

Submit it and see what the mods say! :D

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stylophile July 31 2004, 14:42:28 UTC
Thank you very much! And thank you also for the advice, which is greatly appreciated. I'm glad you liked this chapter and that you didn't mind the sacrificing of plot for character development. :D Thanks for reviewing!

Love

x x

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!!! klikittyklak July 28 2004, 16:52:32 UTC
Kinky giraffe. Must be lonesome...

I loved this chapter (of course!) I think you're ok submitting it though. Lucky it was only that one scene or I'd say forget it. BUt it was really, really well done!

Oh and this bit cracked me up: “You spent how much on a handbag?!” Sean exclaimed suddenly, looking at a black, leather shoulder bag Hermione was now sporting and looking rather guilty about. it reminds me of a certain someone who spent entirely too much to buy a handbag of her own! :-P

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Re: !!! stylophile July 31 2004, 14:44:56 UTC
I also made friends with some kind of exotic cow and threw animal pellets at emus to make them chase the car. Oh the good times!

*Blushes* Handbags make the world go round! *Picks up the fainting physicists out there and fans them unhelpfully*

Thanks for reviewing and for the advice, darling. I need it!

love

x x

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lupin_spirit July 28 2004, 17:06:48 UTC
I enjoyed the latest chapter and I think you're safe with an R rating.

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stylophile July 31 2004, 14:45:28 UTC
Thank you for lending me your thoughts, I'm grateful. :)

x x

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airaloki July 28 2004, 17:43:18 UTC
I think that one scene is fine, at least it's not REALLY REALLY smutty. The mods should be ok with it.

OMG THAT WAS GOOD. *coughs* uh, yeah... i enjoyed that very much, but you can't keep doing this to us!! please write more sooner rather than later. XD

one thing though: the spacing between paragraphs. you should look into fixing that, because it's somewhat difficult to read when it's all smushed up like that.

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stylophile July 31 2004, 14:47:35 UTC
You were right about the spacing issue, which has been amended. Thanks for letting me know. Thanks for telling me what you think, which is greatly appreciated! That scene was originally much smuttier until I read it back and started getting hot flushes. It's then that you know you're writing hardcore porn. I'm so glad you liked this chapter! Next one is actually written and just needs editing so it won't be long.

love

x x

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airaloki August 1 2004, 23:58:52 UTC
*screams* YES!!!

... i mean, uh, good. great. keep on writing.

*leaves*

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stylophile August 3 2004, 01:12:56 UTC
Hee hee! You crack me up. I love your icon btw, Tom Felton is gorgeous. *Sigh* Why are they so young?

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formalizing July 28 2004, 17:48:19 UTC
"You spent how much on a handbag?!" Sean exclaimed suddenly, looking at a black, leather shoulder bag Hermione was now sporting and looking rather guilty about.
"Darling, four hundred pounds isn’t that much," she was saying in a placatory manner, "especially not for Anya Hindmarch."

Trying to bring real life into your fiction, hmmm? *Wink* I stand by the fact that I approve of your drastic purchases.

Much as I adored (and I do mean adored. Not just 'liked', or 'loved'. I would pay *money* to read this again.) the chapter, it would probably be a better idea to tame it down a bit. They really are strict on NC-17 content. I feel bad telling you to censor it for the rest, but I really don't want to see it booted off. You don't need another big mess like that.

And let me just say that I love you, honey. Adore you. Could not live without you and your amazing fic-writing skills. *Hugs and loffs*

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stylophile July 31 2004, 14:55:16 UTC
Hee hee! My LJ friends who have gone through the whole bag-purchasing delights with me all liked that line! If I didn't let my entirely unhealthy preoccupation with clothes/designers/leather become integrated into my slash then I would be forced to buy a housecoat and become a hermit. (What *is* a housecoat, btw?)

Thank you so much for reviewing! You're always so sweet and I really do appreciate your comments. You're right, I should probably tame it down. You should have read it before I published it, this is the non-smutty version. I think the original had more puns involving wands and double the innuendo.

Aw, I adore you too because you make me happy! *Hugs* You are so lovely to me! *Spreads the slash-girl love* If you ever get a craving for a ficlet, drop me a line!

love

x x

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formalizing July 31 2004, 18:21:56 UTC
Housecoat - Soft, fluffy robe like item that ties, zippers, or buttons closed in front and can go down to mid-thigh, knee, or ankle length. Is usually made of towel-like material to be worn after a bath, but can also be silk, satin, or various other materials.

The non-smutty version? Goodness, woman, you astound me. That was fairly smutty. Though, I guess I can see the possibility for more smut. It's too bad that it has to be tamed down... it's ohhhh so good. Wands and double innuendo... ahhh the material wizards have...

Slash girl love. I can only imagine how much of that there is. So many slashers... bwhaha. We could easily take over the world. *Loves, and hugs in return*

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stylophile August 3 2004, 01:15:45 UTC
OH! So *that's* what a housecoat is! I was picturing some private detective style trench coat that people sit around in and smoke cigars or something. Oh it sounds nice, I actually do want one now.

Gnuh, the smut in the original version was... Let's just say I got really carried away but slashers everywhere would have loved it, except those with delicate sensibilities, which just makes them bad slashers.

I'm ranbling now, aren't I?

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