I just want to call you. I just want to call you.

but I cant. Isn't that weird?

ahhhhh so eventually (hopefully soon) I'm thinking I'll stop thinking about you as much but it's been a few months now and it seems to be getting worse. Where the fuck is the doctor for the worst pain I've ever felt?

almost Spring Break what what I cant waittt!! =]

I think I have almost perfected the fake smile...

all I want is to be home wherever that may be.

I hate everything. I feel empty.

Where is my home? and why am I here?

I hate this

I read some of my really old entries. its kind of depressing how much I have changed. If I could have anything it would be to go back in time. Oh and I am over my whole no more writing in LJ thing.

And I really miss all my old friends =[

ahhhhh I am over this livejournal. its stupid.

so first day. everything isnt as bad as I anticipated.... so far. I miss everyone a lot though =/ its a sucky feeling - wishing things would be the same except with a small changes here and there. complicated. I miss T.O no surprise surprise.

how is everyone so calm and excited? I really don't know if I can go through with all this. I'm looking forward to it at all. Its just to hard to stay positive when I am so depressed. I wish I never decided this. I feel horrible and trapped = worst feeling of my life. I just need a good friend to be there with me I guess. Fell through and now I am ( Read more... )

I hate goodbyes. Who would have known you could love someone so much? I have never really had close friends that were basically my other half. This has been the toughest week by far. I feel like I am just getting settled with everything in TO and now I am going to be thrown into completely different place with nobody. It just seems like everyone ( Read more... )

sooo I am going to SFSU on August 25th and EVERYONE should mail me attttt:

Alyssa Prowler
MPH-535B
802 Font Boulevard
San Francisco, CA 94132-4036

=]