I Saw Her Standing There Chapter 3/?

[suburban_boho]

“Ugh.” Alice sighed, twisting on the sofa to find a better place. The old sofa had seen better days and they desperately needed another, but  funds were tight. It was more common for them to curl up in bed with a video tape, normally one they had watched until it was in danger of being worn out, than to watch television much. Company never stayed

Comments

[jonesingjay]

It's frustrating as a reader to know that Alice is telling the truth, but Nell refuses to believe. She has every right to believe that Alice's story is pure fiction though

[suburban_boho]

That's one of the worst things about being a reader sometimes; we see everything, the characters only see their little teeny world views. Nell honestly, wasn't supposed to be the entity she became (or you know, exist at all...Alice initially wasn't planned to be with a woman or even have a relationship)but I'm glad she's making people feel things. Even if it is frustration and annoyance. She's got her reasons but I don't know if they'll ever be known to the audience

[jonesingjay]

Nell doesn't need to be there, but Alice is a bit of an avoidant type, so Nell has to push Alice to do things, major things. But I think it could present an interesting angle.I'm a fan of two characters having their moment. Just the two of them without outside interference. It's why I'm annoyed with Nell for inserting herself into the phone call. I know it might be good for someone like Alice to have her support system there for a difficult conversation, but I feel that it's very private. Almost sacred and something for only Alice and Mo to be privy to what is said during that first phone call. I know they can have plenty of moments together alone whether it be a face to face meeting or more phone calls in the future though. There is just something about that moment of contact in years that I feel should be just for the two of them. Maybe, Alice really needs Nell around, but I doubt Mo will have anyone there to support her on her end of the call. She doesn't even have anyone to tell of this affair she had. I feel badly for Mo. At

[suburban_boho]

Well, Nell has only offered. Or at least she sees it as an offer, not a command. It can read both ways, depending on how you read their relationship. I don't want to say one way or the other,(I want to have some surprises up my sleeve still, lol) but it's certainly going to be a point of interest to see what happens. I do personally feel it would be very private and something that should be between only Mo and Alice. They will get many moments alone from October to I guess early December, but that first one in theory should be theirs only. It depends on how much of a jerk I want to make Nell about it. That changes on a daily basis

[mollybeakers]

I honestly don't know what to think of Nell's seemingly very insecure reaction. Yes, the story seems a bit out there... but moving straight to 'you're a liar' is extreme. But... I dunno. She's had some experience with being lied to? It's endlessly interesting

[suburban_boho]

Nell has been interesting for me to write. Alice's backstory I've worked on a fair bit with some help from Jay ,but Nell was never supposed to exist at first Alice wasn't supposed to be in a relationship with a female (or even at all) but once she did exist, Nell wasn't supposed to make more than a brief appearance here and there. But she's become something of an entity, but I don't know if I'll ever lay out her whole story. I'm trying to keep my POV the same so Nell's backstory would be hard to lay out. I'm glad it's keeping you interested. It means the 'present' day is just as interesting as the flashbacks.

It's interesting that you read that Nell wanted to be there for the phone conversation as controlling and Jay read it as being supportive. That kind of interpretation difference is why I ended up in 60k in debt chasing an English Degree, by the way, lol. But in all seriousness, you brought up an angle I hadn't meant for it to come off as, but it's an interesting one. I like

[mollybeakers]

Guessing at Nell's backstory is enough, really. She's a tool that your main character can play off of. I assumed this was your intent. Because... I assume constantly. ha

[suburban_boho]

No, no need to apologize. I love long comments and essay length discussions are good. I wish my classes in college had been this lively a discussion, lol