Second Chance LJ Idol Week 3: Busman's Holiday

[suesniffsglue]

I set a Kentucky Bourbon Barrel Ale on the bar and the bartender opens it for me. I am feeling good; I can relax--it's Friday and I'm watching my husband's band play. Next thing I know a person plops next to me. I vaguely recognize him as someone my husband knows. Within moments, he is talking my ear off. A half hour later, he knows nothing about

Comments

[karmasoup]

I have stopped mid-read to make the comment that your friend is not a very good friend, and I don't actually understand how you can't see that you're not the one who's being a bad friend here. You actually took the time and personal energy out to tell her you weren't okay with her taking advantage of your limited and rare moment of reaching out in need to flip the tables and make it all about herself, denying you of the valuable resource you had hoped she would be for you; her response is to effectively admit she will never be such a resource for you, she will just give you your space until you're ready to be the sponge for her emotional baggage again, and YOU feel like the bad friend

[halfshellvenus]

I wondered if someone would use being a doctor or therapist for this prompt, whether fiction or not! Because you really can't escape your job easily when you're in one of those professions.

Therapy especially. People love to talk about their problems even when you AREN'T a therapist, and I can imagine how much more tiring it would be if you were!

[suesniffsglue]

I was really trying to think of something fictional, but I just kept coming back to how this is how MY life feels!

[karmasoup]

Okay, so, now, having read the rest of your entry, since you didn't ask, but you did say you don't know how to turn it off, I would say I'm not sure I believe that's true. I think some part of you probably does know how to turn it off, but it's so ingrained in you that you don't even consider doing so as an option, even though it's right there in front of you, and always has been. Here's the thing... these people don't open up to you just because you sit down next to them and you have a face. They open up to you because you care about people, you find them interesting and fascinating, and you naturally ask leading questions, to which they are happy to respond, because you've given them an open invitation, and everyone wants to talk about themselves, so they happily accept and walk through. It's probably so second nature to you, you do this without thinking about it. It might even be such a part of your routine you don't even notice it

[suesniffsglue]

You're certainly right! I I appreciate you taking so much care in responding. I know it is something i need to get better at! Sometimes it's very enriching and other times totally exhausting.

And you're totaly right about the friend. I wrote it with how I genuinely felt at the time, which was awful, but I know she wasnt being a good friend in that moment at all. It's always been a struggle we've had!

[tonithegreat]

Do licensed therapists take an oath like the Hippocratic oath, I wonder? Even without such a thing, I’m sure it’s hard to carve out non working time. This was really well done.

[suesniffsglue]

Thank you so much! There is not such an oath for us, but it certainly feels like there might as well be one!

[adoptedwriter]

I know the feeling a teacher.