Operation:Turn Off [1/2]
Title: Operation: Turn Off
Rating: PG-15
Genre: Romance, humour, crack (mostly crack), slight!smut
Pairings: Kyumin, other Super Junior pairings
Summary: Kyuhyun and Sungmin are planning to have sex, but what happens when the members find out?
A/N: I woke up at 6 am and drank coffee, that's why.
--------------------
"Mmm, Kyubear?" asked Sungmin as he tried to detach his lips from Kyuhyun's, who was trying to re-attach them, but his boyfriend stopped him with a finger.
"What Minnie-bunny? I'd like to get back to making out with you, I miss kissing you!" whined the maknae with a pout.
"Aww, you're so cute when you pout like that!" squealed the elder as he pinched the younger's cheeks.
"Oww! Min I told you I hate it when people pinch me!" wailed Kyuhyun.
"It's not my fault you started pouting!" retorted Sungmin.
Kyuhyun sighed and wrapped his arms around Sungmin's shoulders, drawing him closer to his chest.
"I pick up from you, don't I?" the maknae asked with a smirk.
"Because you love me?" came Sungmin's muffled voice, his head against Kyuhyun's chest.
"Yup! Now what did you want to ask me?" piped Kyuhyn, stroking his boyfriend's silky, raven-black hair.
"Umm..well...you and me...it's been what...5 years already since we started dating?" started Sungmin.
"Yes," answered Kyuhyun.
"Well, 5 years is a long time, and we're getting really serious now right?"
"Yes, continue."
"Well...I've been thinking...do you...you know?"
"What? Know what Min, I don't know what you're getting at."
"You know...go...further...with our relationship?"
"Further? As in?"
"As in...having sex with each other," finished Sungmin.
Kyuhyun held Sungmin by his shoulders, his round, dark orbs staring straight into Sungmin's doe ones.
"M-M-Minnie, a-a-are you s-s-saying...that...that...you...want to...do it...with me...?" stuttered Kyuhyun, trying to process what Sungmin had just proclaimed to him.
"W-W-Well we don't have to if you don't want to! I was just asking, cuz I think I'm ready, but I don't know if you're ready, but I didn't ask you cuz I didn't wanna pressure you, that's why I kept it to my-" Sungmin's ranting was cut off with Kyuhyun's lips against his, silencing his pink self from forming words.
"Calm down Min, you're turning red, but I don't think it's from embarrasment," Kyuhyun whispered against Sungmin's lips. Sungmin felt his cheeks warm up, and hung his head in embarrassment. Kyuhyun lifted his chin so that their eyes met.
"Is it true Min? Do you feel like you're ready to have sex with me?" he asked the shorter man softly. Sungmin answered him with a slow nod.
Kyuhyun pulled him into another tight embrace, burying his head into the crook of Sungmin's neck.
"Thank you Min, thank you so much!" he whispered, pecking the pale skin of his boyfriend's neck.
"For what?' squeaked a still-embarassed Sungmin.
"For saving me the trouble of asking you," answered the smiling maknae.
"Huh?" came Sungmin's response.
"Ok, I'm being honest with you Min, I actually wanted to have sex with you a few years ago, but I didn't want to make you feel pressured about it, cuz sex isn't a requirement for couples, it's more of a...benefit I guess?" started Kyuhyun.
"Well then that explains 'Friends with benefits', doesn't it?" piped Sungmin, emitting laughter from both of them.
"Anyway, sex is meant as a way of showing your partner that you love them, emotionally and physically, that's why it's saved for when both parties are ready," finished Kyuhyun. He rested his forehead against Sungmin's, their noses brushing against each other.
"Are you sure about this Min? Are you...ready?" Kyuhyun asked, seriousness in his tone. Sungmin gave him a firm nod as a reply.
"I'm ready Kyu. I'm ready to be yours and for you to be mine," he answered, pecking his boyfriend's nose.
"Alright then. We're going to do this, but now we need to figure out when," stated Kyuhyun.
"When?" asked Sungmin, arching his eyebrows.
"Well we have a lot going on this week, so where are we suppose to fit our love making session in with our schedule?"
"Oh right, we have Mr. Simple promotions, Heechul-hyung's enlistment, and SM Town too. Well, we won't be back in Seoul until Saturday, so is Sunday night good?'
"Well, I have nothing planned for Monday, and you're no longer doing Jack the Ripper, so I guess we're both free Monday," stated Kyuhyun.
Sungmin nodded, finalizing his answer with his boyfriend.
"Then, Sunday night it is," answered the now smiling Sungmin.
---------A few minutes ago--------
"Wonder if Minnie-hyung's gonna make anything with these strawberries, they're gonna go bad if no one eats them," Eunhyuk muttered to himself as he munched on the bright red berries, a bowl of them in his arms as he made his way towards his hyung's and Kyuhyun's room.
He was about to knock, but then he realized the door was slightly ajar, thus he could hear bits and pieces of the couple's conversation.
"You know...go...further...with our relationship?" he heard Sungmin ask.
Go further? Where can you go at this rate hyung? the blonde asked mentally.
"Further? As in?" came the maknae's reply.
Yeah, as in? he repeated the spoken words.
"As in...having sex with each other," was Sungmin's answer.
Eunhyuk almost choked on his strawberry, as he covered his mouth, trying not to make a sound as he listened on to Kyumin's conversation.
"M-M-Minnie, a-a-are you s-s-saying...that...that...you...want to...do it...with me...?" spoke the maknae.
OMG hyung, are you serious?! screamed Eunhyuk to himself.
"W-W-Well we don't have to if you don't want to! I was just asking, cuz I think I'm ready, but I don't know if you're ready, but I didn't ask you cuz I didn't wanna pressure you, that's why I kept it to my-" was all Sungmin got out before his voice was cut off.
Oh no he was serious! wailed the blonde man mentally as he ran off to the kitchen, grasping his chest, trying to calm his breathing as he processed what he just heard.
Min-hyung...and Kyuhyunnie....want...to...oh god I can't even say it!
Eunhyuk grabbed a fistful of hair, tugging at it in frustration. What could he do? His best friend and dongsaeng were going to lose their virginities damnit, and here he was, freaking out about it with a bowl of strawberries!
What am I gonna do, what am I gonna do, what am I gonna do? He asked himself as he paced around the kitchen.
Right, I need to tell someone, but who?
He continued to pace around the kitchen.
Right, I must tell Hae! No wait forget Hae, I need to tell Teukie-hyung! What am I saying, we need a family meeting, without Kyumin! Eunhyuk quickly pulled out his cellphone and texted Yesung.
To: Sunggie-hyung
From: Hyukjae
Family meeting, 12th floor now!
P.S Don't tell Kyumin, this involves them!
P.P.S Tell Siwon too!
Ok, now I gotta tell the others!
He was about to head upstairs when he heard the couple exitting their room, giggling and whispering to each other.
"Hyukkie! Me and Kyu are going for a walk ok?" came Sungmin's voice from the front door.
"What? Oh ok hyung, and are you gonna make cake with the strawberries or not?" Eunhyuk decided to ask.
"Uhh no, you can eat them if you want," came Sungmin's reply as the door closed. Eunhyuk ran over as soon as the door was closed, listening to the sound of their footsteps. As soon as they were out of hearing distance, he opened the door slowly, then made a beeline for the stairs and zoomed up to the 12th floor dorm.
---------------
"Teukie-hyung! Hae! Open up I have something important to tell you!" shreaked Eunhyuk as he consistenly banged on the door of his boyfriend's and their leader's room. He was banging so quickly that he didn't realize that the door had opened, and now he was banging on Leeteuk's head.
"Oww! Shit Lee Hyukjae, if you don't stop banging my head, I'm gonna burn your insoles!" snapped the leader, rubbing his sore head.
"Hyung! If you burn Hyukkie's insoles, I'm dying your wardrobe rainbow colours!" wailed Donghae as he ran to his boyfriend, hugging him protectively.
"Aish, shut up out there would ya?! I don't need to enlist with a headache you know!" screeched Heechul from the bathroom.
"Now what's so important that you had to bang my head for?" came Leeteuk's voice as the leader approached them, nursing his sore head with ice.
"Ok first off, is everyone who is not Kyu or Min here?" asked Eunhyuk.
"Yes we're all here," piped a voice from behind Eunhyuk, who jumped and discovered Yesung with an arm around Ryeowook, and Ddangkoma on his head.
"Shit Hyung! Stop doing that it creeps me out!" yelped the blonde.
How the fuck do you balance a turtle on your head? He added mentally.
"What's the emergency? I had to leave the set of my drama early you know? The PDs are not happy, I can tell you that much," came Siwon's voice from the door.
"Yeah, and I was about to eat too!" whined Shindong from the kitchen.
"Okay," started Eunhyuk, "before I say it, you guys might wanna hold onto something, cuz it's really...uhh...shocking news?"
"It better be, cuz my skin needs facializing, and you're interupting it!" snapped Heechul as he wrapped his arms around Siwon's waist.
"Spit it out hyung, you're confusing me!" whined Ryeowook as he hugged Yesung tighter.
"Alright then," Eunhyuk started again, "what I meant to say was, I overheard Kyu and Min-hyung saying-"
"How many times do I have to tell you about eavesdropping?!" yelled the leader.
"I didn't eavesdrop! I was going to ask Min-hyung if he needed strawberries for anything, and I was going to knock, but the door was opened, and then I just happened to be there at the wrong time, so I ended up hearing them planning to-" rambled Eunhyuk before he was cut off.
"Oh my fucking god, get to the point damnit!" screeched Heechul, earning him a reprimanding "Language" from Siwon.
"Kyu and Min are planning to have sex with each other!" Eunhyuk screamed at the top of his lungs, leaving everyone else blank and silent.
"What...did...you...just...say?" Leeteuk asked slowly.
"Kyu.and.Min.are.going.to.have.sex." came the blonde's slow answer.
"Oh dear lord," breathed the leader as he collapsed onto the floor, Yewook hurrying over to his aid.
"Fuck.No." blurted Heechul.
"Oh dear my tummy," moaned Shindong as he held his belly.
"I-I-Is it true?" stuttered Siwon.
"Oh my goodness!" wailed Ryeowook as he started crying, Yesung rubbing his back trying to soothe him.
"Already?" piped Hae, "but it's so soon!"
"I know! I'm just...I didn't what to do...so I wanted to tell someone, but now we all know," groaned Eunhyuk as he slumped to the floor, Donghae following and doing the same as he cuddled next to his boyfriend.
They all sat and stood there, silent, trying to take in the news that Eunhyuk had just delivered.
"So," Donghae started, "what now?"
"Did they mention when they plan to do this?" asked an exhausted Leeteuk.
"Sunday night," was Eunhyuk's answer.
"Then, what are we going to do about it?" groaned Shindong, who sounded like he was gonna vomit.
"I'll tell you what! We need to stop them, that's what!" declared Heechul.
"Hyung, are you serious?" questioned a concerned Siwon, knowing Heechul's irrationality would lead to drastic consequences.
"How are we suppose to that?" piped Yesung as he continued to soothe the weeping eternal maknae.
"Y-Y-Yeah, how...can...we...stop...them...?" sobbed Ryeowook.
"I...don't know yet, but all I know is, no one is this dorm is having sex before Kim Heechul does, that's for sure!" declared Heechul.
"Wow hyung, you never did it with Siwon or Hankyung yet? I half-expected you to bang them both at the same time!" piped Donghae.
"What on Earth gave you that idea?" gasped Leeteuk, trying to breathe steadily.
"Well, they are a threesome, and fans are always writing about them having threesomes together, and Heechul did start the fan fic craze around here, so I thought they would've been first," stated Donghae matter-of-factly.
"How are threesomes suppose to work anyway?" asked Eunhyuk with arched eyebrows.
"Well. from what I read, there's usually one person who's in the middle while being topped by one while they bottom an-" Donghae started before being cut off by Yesung, blocking Ryeowook's ears with one shoulder and hand, the other hand covering Ddangkoma's...ears?
"Not while my babies are in the room!" snapped Yesung.
Where the hell are the ears on a turtle? Eunhyuk asked himself.
Donghae put his hands up defensively, as if protecting himself from Yesung and Ddangkoma. Mostly Ddangkoma.
"Alright alright we don't need to hear about how threesomes work. What we do need to hear, however, is how are we gonna stop Kyumin from making love to each other before I do?" snapped Heechul, who looked like he was gonna rip his hair out, if not for Siwon's restraint on him.
"Hyung, why do you have to be first?" asked Siwon gently.
"Uhh let's see. If they have sex first, the sex craze is gonna go around and then before you know it, everyone's having sex in the dorms except for me. Why? Cuz I'm gonna be doing public services for 2 damn years, which means I'll be working everyday, which means I'm gonna be too damn sleepy to have sex with you or Hannie, if he ever returns from China. Plus, you wanna save sex until after marriage, so what am I suppose to do? Go bang one of the others or worse, a girl? You know me, it's either guys or sex toys, I am never touching a girl, ever!" finished Heechul without having to take a breather.
"Well then, why don't you marry me now, and then we can make love together?" proposed Siwon.
Heechul glared at him, which made the bigger man shrivel away from him slightly.
"I'm enlisting in 2 days Shisus, and I'm not marrying you without Hannie. Plus, if I have start having sex now, I'm gonna crave it while serving, and no way in hell am I risking getting caught jerking myself off while performing my service! No way in hell!" screeched Heechul.
"Okay okay hyung! We need to stop them!" wailed Siwon, fearing that his boyfriend might go Cat Woman on his precious face.
"But how?" questioned Eunhyuk.
"Well let's see, if they want to have sex, there must be something about both of them that turns the other on right?" started Yesung.
"Right, we need a list of that. Wonnie notepad!" demanded Heechul as Siwon rushed to his room, returning with his pink notepad and pen.
"Alright everyone think. What are Kyumin's turn-ons?" asked Heechul seriously, looking like he was ready for a long lecture.
"Well, I catch Kyu staring at Sungmin's butt often, but he does it off camera. Well actually Sungmin does it too," piped Yesung.
"And don't forget their hair, they're very touchy touchy when it comes to each other's hair," added Ryeowook.
"Don't forget candy, especially lollipops. Hyunnie's imagination goes wild when he sees Sungmin sucking on them," replied Shindong.
"How would you know?" came Donghae's voice.
"I heard him. Once. By accident. In the bathroom. Me and him were the ones home at that time," answered the chubby man.
"Okay back to the list. What else?" asked Heechul.
"Their thighs! Both of them are turned on each other's thighs I swear!" blurted Donghae.
"And how would you know?" asked Eunhyuk suspisciously.
"Don't you see them? Everytime one of them's in skinny jeans, the other's practically drooling!" flailed the younger.
"How about their voices? Kyuhyun's is sensuous while Sungmin-hyung's is sweet," added Siwon.
"Eyeliner, for sure eyeliner, you don't know how many times they were secretly looking at each other with that stuff on," answered Eunhyuk.
"Their tongues, man they're always caught sticking out of their mouths in some sort of comprimising expression," replied Heechul.
"Okay so what do we have so far?" Leeteuk spoke after a while.
"Butts, hair, lollipops, thighs, voices, eyeliner, tongues. What else are we missing?" asked Heechul as he scratched his head with his pen.
"You forgot something important," stated Leeteuk.
"What?" blurted the others at once.
Leeteuk smiled his greasy smile, and replied:
"Well, what do couples love to do that leads to sex in the first place?"
They all nodded in agreement, and answered at the same time, "Kiss!"
"Their lips!" answered Ryeowook.
"I'm surprised we forgot!" piped Donghae.
"Kyuhyun's full ones and Sungmin-hyung's heart ones, they're a perfect match!" exclaimed Siwon.
"Alright then, I think we're done with the turn-ons," stated Heechul as he flipped to a new page.
"Now for the fun part: turn-offs. Let's hear 'em!" demanded a very enthusiastic Heechul.
"Well, Kyubaby's not a fan of plushies, especially bunnies. Oh and shopping," started Leeteuk
"And Min hates Starcraft, no wait he doesn't he plays it now too! But he does get annoyed when Kyu ignores him for Starcraft!" blurted Donghae.
"Minnie loves sweets and strawberries while Kyu hates them!" added Shindong.
"They hate it when the other tries to do aegyo," stated Yesung.
"Kyu can't stand the sight of pink!" exclaimed Ryeowook.
"Kyuhyun's on the lazy side, so Sungmin-hyung hates it when he has to nag him to do something, oh and Kyu hates being nagged," replied Siwon knowingly.
"Ok we've got quite a list, but I feel like something's missing," stated Heechul as he stared at his list, trying to find the one main Kyumin turn-off.
Plushies, shopping, Starcraft, sweets, strawberries, aegyo, pink, nagging and being nagged at. What else? Think Chullie think.
"I've got it!" exclaimed Heechul as he flipped to a new page and scribbled his answer down.
This, this is the ultimate turn-off, Heechul told himself proudly.
"What? What is it?!" shreaked Leeteuk.
"Spit it out hyung!" snapped Eunhyuk.
"Really, Chullie, what is it, we're all anticipating your answer, since it requires a new page," Siwon stated, trying not to whine.
"This," Heechul started, "is the ultimate turn-off." With a dramatic flip, he turned his notepad around, revealing his answer.
"Oh," started Shindong.
"My," continued Eunhyuk.
"Gosh. Why didn't we think of it before?" asked Ryeowook.
"Yeah, it's the most obvious one too!" exclaimed Donghae.
There, on Heechul's notepad, in giant letters, was Kyumin's main turn-off.
PIMPLES.
"Chullie, you're a genius!" exclaimed Siwon as he kissed Heechul's cheek passionately.
"You realize that now?" scoffed Heechul.
"Ok Heechul, we have their turn ons and turn offs. Now what?" asked their leader.
"Now we can put my plan into action!" boomed the younger.
"What plan?" questioned the others.
Heechul smirked, then answered:
"Operation: Turn-Off."
TBC~
A/N: Amazing what one mug of coffee can do to a person, ehh?
Ok, I'm not really much of a coffee person, but when you have to wake up at 6 so you can get to school by 7, caffeine does help to go that extra mile.
As for school, today was just pre-registration, but I only have a week left till school officially starts, which means I'm gonna have less time to write...again T_T
This sucks, since I just started my chaptered fic, but after school starts I'm gonna have to update it even slower. Plus, since it's my last year in high school, this year matters more than anything. My future pretty much starts off in grade 12...
Well, onto happier thoughts. I actually got this idea a while ago, but I didn't know how to put it together. Who knew caffeine would kick start it again? xDDD
Maybe I should drink coffee more often, nae?
Also, since we're all ELFs, and ELF is one giant family, I wanna get to know all you shippers out there, so visit this entry to tell me a bit about yourself. It can be one word or one paragraph, w.e you like:
I never really got to introduce myself, so here's my chance, and plus I'm kinda bored.
Anyway, see you soon!
<3 Liz
Spots: fumikux3, angelqmin, 13plus2
Rating: PG-15
Genre: Romance, humour, crack (mostly crack), slight!smut
Pairings: Kyumin, other Super Junior pairings
Summary: Kyuhyun and Sungmin are planning to have sex, but what happens when the members find out?
A/N: I woke up at 6 am and drank coffee, that's why.
--------------------
"Mmm, Kyubear?" asked Sungmin as he tried to detach his lips from Kyuhyun's, who was trying to re-attach them, but his boyfriend stopped him with a finger.
"What Minnie-bunny? I'd like to get back to making out with you, I miss kissing you!" whined the maknae with a pout.
"Aww, you're so cute when you pout like that!" squealed the elder as he pinched the younger's cheeks.
"Oww! Min I told you I hate it when people pinch me!" wailed Kyuhyun.
"It's not my fault you started pouting!" retorted Sungmin.
Kyuhyun sighed and wrapped his arms around Sungmin's shoulders, drawing him closer to his chest.
"I pick up from you, don't I?" the maknae asked with a smirk.
"Because you love me?" came Sungmin's muffled voice, his head against Kyuhyun's chest.
"Yup! Now what did you want to ask me?" piped Kyuhyn, stroking his boyfriend's silky, raven-black hair.
"Umm..well...you and me...it's been what...5 years already since we started dating?" started Sungmin.
"Yes," answered Kyuhyun.
"Well, 5 years is a long time, and we're getting really serious now right?"
"Yes, continue."
"Well...I've been thinking...do you...you know?"
"What? Know what Min, I don't know what you're getting at."
"You know...go...further...with our relationship?"
"Further? As in?"
"As in...having sex with each other," finished Sungmin.
Kyuhyun held Sungmin by his shoulders, his round, dark orbs staring straight into Sungmin's doe ones.
"M-M-Minnie, a-a-are you s-s-saying...that...that...you...want to...do it...with me...?" stuttered Kyuhyun, trying to process what Sungmin had just proclaimed to him.
"W-W-Well we don't have to if you don't want to! I was just asking, cuz I think I'm ready, but I don't know if you're ready, but I didn't ask you cuz I didn't wanna pressure you, that's why I kept it to my-" Sungmin's ranting was cut off with Kyuhyun's lips against his, silencing his pink self from forming words.
"Calm down Min, you're turning red, but I don't think it's from embarrasment," Kyuhyun whispered against Sungmin's lips. Sungmin felt his cheeks warm up, and hung his head in embarrassment. Kyuhyun lifted his chin so that their eyes met.
"Is it true Min? Do you feel like you're ready to have sex with me?" he asked the shorter man softly. Sungmin answered him with a slow nod.
Kyuhyun pulled him into another tight embrace, burying his head into the crook of Sungmin's neck.
"Thank you Min, thank you so much!" he whispered, pecking the pale skin of his boyfriend's neck.
"For what?' squeaked a still-embarassed Sungmin.
"For saving me the trouble of asking you," answered the smiling maknae.
"Huh?" came Sungmin's response.
"Ok, I'm being honest with you Min, I actually wanted to have sex with you a few years ago, but I didn't want to make you feel pressured about it, cuz sex isn't a requirement for couples, it's more of a...benefit I guess?" started Kyuhyun.
"Well then that explains 'Friends with benefits', doesn't it?" piped Sungmin, emitting laughter from both of them.
"Anyway, sex is meant as a way of showing your partner that you love them, emotionally and physically, that's why it's saved for when both parties are ready," finished Kyuhyun. He rested his forehead against Sungmin's, their noses brushing against each other.
"Are you sure about this Min? Are you...ready?" Kyuhyun asked, seriousness in his tone. Sungmin gave him a firm nod as a reply.
"I'm ready Kyu. I'm ready to be yours and for you to be mine," he answered, pecking his boyfriend's nose.
"Alright then. We're going to do this, but now we need to figure out when," stated Kyuhyun.
"When?" asked Sungmin, arching his eyebrows.
"Well we have a lot going on this week, so where are we suppose to fit our love making session in with our schedule?"
"Oh right, we have Mr. Simple promotions, Heechul-hyung's enlistment, and SM Town too. Well, we won't be back in Seoul until Saturday, so is Sunday night good?'
"Well, I have nothing planned for Monday, and you're no longer doing Jack the Ripper, so I guess we're both free Monday," stated Kyuhyun.
Sungmin nodded, finalizing his answer with his boyfriend.
"Then, Sunday night it is," answered the now smiling Sungmin.
---------A few minutes ago--------
"Wonder if Minnie-hyung's gonna make anything with these strawberries, they're gonna go bad if no one eats them," Eunhyuk muttered to himself as he munched on the bright red berries, a bowl of them in his arms as he made his way towards his hyung's and Kyuhyun's room.
He was about to knock, but then he realized the door was slightly ajar, thus he could hear bits and pieces of the couple's conversation.
"You know...go...further...with our relationship?" he heard Sungmin ask.
Go further? Where can you go at this rate hyung? the blonde asked mentally.
"Further? As in?" came the maknae's reply.
Yeah, as in? he repeated the spoken words.
"As in...having sex with each other," was Sungmin's answer.
Eunhyuk almost choked on his strawberry, as he covered his mouth, trying not to make a sound as he listened on to Kyumin's conversation.
"M-M-Minnie, a-a-are you s-s-saying...that...that...you...want to...do it...with me...?" spoke the maknae.
OMG hyung, are you serious?! screamed Eunhyuk to himself.
"W-W-Well we don't have to if you don't want to! I was just asking, cuz I think I'm ready, but I don't know if you're ready, but I didn't ask you cuz I didn't wanna pressure you, that's why I kept it to my-" was all Sungmin got out before his voice was cut off.
Oh no he was serious! wailed the blonde man mentally as he ran off to the kitchen, grasping his chest, trying to calm his breathing as he processed what he just heard.
Min-hyung...and Kyuhyunnie....want...to...oh god I can't even say it!
Eunhyuk grabbed a fistful of hair, tugging at it in frustration. What could he do? His best friend and dongsaeng were going to lose their virginities damnit, and here he was, freaking out about it with a bowl of strawberries!
What am I gonna do, what am I gonna do, what am I gonna do? He asked himself as he paced around the kitchen.
Right, I need to tell someone, but who?
He continued to pace around the kitchen.
Right, I must tell Hae! No wait forget Hae, I need to tell Teukie-hyung! What am I saying, we need a family meeting, without Kyumin! Eunhyuk quickly pulled out his cellphone and texted Yesung.
To: Sunggie-hyung
From: Hyukjae
Family meeting, 12th floor now!
P.S Don't tell Kyumin, this involves them!
P.P.S Tell Siwon too!
Ok, now I gotta tell the others!
He was about to head upstairs when he heard the couple exitting their room, giggling and whispering to each other.
"Hyukkie! Me and Kyu are going for a walk ok?" came Sungmin's voice from the front door.
"What? Oh ok hyung, and are you gonna make cake with the strawberries or not?" Eunhyuk decided to ask.
"Uhh no, you can eat them if you want," came Sungmin's reply as the door closed. Eunhyuk ran over as soon as the door was closed, listening to the sound of their footsteps. As soon as they were out of hearing distance, he opened the door slowly, then made a beeline for the stairs and zoomed up to the 12th floor dorm.
---------------
"Teukie-hyung! Hae! Open up I have something important to tell you!" shreaked Eunhyuk as he consistenly banged on the door of his boyfriend's and their leader's room. He was banging so quickly that he didn't realize that the door had opened, and now he was banging on Leeteuk's head.
"Oww! Shit Lee Hyukjae, if you don't stop banging my head, I'm gonna burn your insoles!" snapped the leader, rubbing his sore head.
"Hyung! If you burn Hyukkie's insoles, I'm dying your wardrobe rainbow colours!" wailed Donghae as he ran to his boyfriend, hugging him protectively.
"Aish, shut up out there would ya?! I don't need to enlist with a headache you know!" screeched Heechul from the bathroom.
"Now what's so important that you had to bang my head for?" came Leeteuk's voice as the leader approached them, nursing his sore head with ice.
"Ok first off, is everyone who is not Kyu or Min here?" asked Eunhyuk.
"Yes we're all here," piped a voice from behind Eunhyuk, who jumped and discovered Yesung with an arm around Ryeowook, and Ddangkoma on his head.
"Shit Hyung! Stop doing that it creeps me out!" yelped the blonde.
How the fuck do you balance a turtle on your head? He added mentally.
"What's the emergency? I had to leave the set of my drama early you know? The PDs are not happy, I can tell you that much," came Siwon's voice from the door.
"Yeah, and I was about to eat too!" whined Shindong from the kitchen.
"Okay," started Eunhyuk, "before I say it, you guys might wanna hold onto something, cuz it's really...uhh...shocking news?"
"It better be, cuz my skin needs facializing, and you're interupting it!" snapped Heechul as he wrapped his arms around Siwon's waist.
"Spit it out hyung, you're confusing me!" whined Ryeowook as he hugged Yesung tighter.
"Alright then," Eunhyuk started again, "what I meant to say was, I overheard Kyu and Min-hyung saying-"
"How many times do I have to tell you about eavesdropping?!" yelled the leader.
"I didn't eavesdrop! I was going to ask Min-hyung if he needed strawberries for anything, and I was going to knock, but the door was opened, and then I just happened to be there at the wrong time, so I ended up hearing them planning to-" rambled Eunhyuk before he was cut off.
"Oh my fucking god, get to the point damnit!" screeched Heechul, earning him a reprimanding "Language" from Siwon.
"Kyu and Min are planning to have sex with each other!" Eunhyuk screamed at the top of his lungs, leaving everyone else blank and silent.
"What...did...you...just...say?" Leeteuk asked slowly.
"Kyu.and.Min.are.going.to.have.sex." came the blonde's slow answer.
"Oh dear lord," breathed the leader as he collapsed onto the floor, Yewook hurrying over to his aid.
"Fuck.No." blurted Heechul.
"Oh dear my tummy," moaned Shindong as he held his belly.
"I-I-Is it true?" stuttered Siwon.
"Oh my goodness!" wailed Ryeowook as he started crying, Yesung rubbing his back trying to soothe him.
"Already?" piped Hae, "but it's so soon!"
"I know! I'm just...I didn't what to do...so I wanted to tell someone, but now we all know," groaned Eunhyuk as he slumped to the floor, Donghae following and doing the same as he cuddled next to his boyfriend.
They all sat and stood there, silent, trying to take in the news that Eunhyuk had just delivered.
"So," Donghae started, "what now?"
"Did they mention when they plan to do this?" asked an exhausted Leeteuk.
"Sunday night," was Eunhyuk's answer.
"Then, what are we going to do about it?" groaned Shindong, who sounded like he was gonna vomit.
"I'll tell you what! We need to stop them, that's what!" declared Heechul.
"Hyung, are you serious?" questioned a concerned Siwon, knowing Heechul's irrationality would lead to drastic consequences.
"How are we suppose to that?" piped Yesung as he continued to soothe the weeping eternal maknae.
"Y-Y-Yeah, how...can...we...stop...them...?" sobbed Ryeowook.
"I...don't know yet, but all I know is, no one is this dorm is having sex before Kim Heechul does, that's for sure!" declared Heechul.
"Wow hyung, you never did it with Siwon or Hankyung yet? I half-expected you to bang them both at the same time!" piped Donghae.
"What on Earth gave you that idea?" gasped Leeteuk, trying to breathe steadily.
"Well, they are a threesome, and fans are always writing about them having threesomes together, and Heechul did start the fan fic craze around here, so I thought they would've been first," stated Donghae matter-of-factly.
"How are threesomes suppose to work anyway?" asked Eunhyuk with arched eyebrows.
"Well. from what I read, there's usually one person who's in the middle while being topped by one while they bottom an-" Donghae started before being cut off by Yesung, blocking Ryeowook's ears with one shoulder and hand, the other hand covering Ddangkoma's...ears?
"Not while my babies are in the room!" snapped Yesung.
Where the hell are the ears on a turtle? Eunhyuk asked himself.
Donghae put his hands up defensively, as if protecting himself from Yesung and Ddangkoma. Mostly Ddangkoma.
"Alright alright we don't need to hear about how threesomes work. What we do need to hear, however, is how are we gonna stop Kyumin from making love to each other before I do?" snapped Heechul, who looked like he was gonna rip his hair out, if not for Siwon's restraint on him.
"Hyung, why do you have to be first?" asked Siwon gently.
"Uhh let's see. If they have sex first, the sex craze is gonna go around and then before you know it, everyone's having sex in the dorms except for me. Why? Cuz I'm gonna be doing public services for 2 damn years, which means I'll be working everyday, which means I'm gonna be too damn sleepy to have sex with you or Hannie, if he ever returns from China. Plus, you wanna save sex until after marriage, so what am I suppose to do? Go bang one of the others or worse, a girl? You know me, it's either guys or sex toys, I am never touching a girl, ever!" finished Heechul without having to take a breather.
"Well then, why don't you marry me now, and then we can make love together?" proposed Siwon.
Heechul glared at him, which made the bigger man shrivel away from him slightly.
"I'm enlisting in 2 days Shisus, and I'm not marrying you without Hannie. Plus, if I have start having sex now, I'm gonna crave it while serving, and no way in hell am I risking getting caught jerking myself off while performing my service! No way in hell!" screeched Heechul.
"Okay okay hyung! We need to stop them!" wailed Siwon, fearing that his boyfriend might go Cat Woman on his precious face.
"But how?" questioned Eunhyuk.
"Well let's see, if they want to have sex, there must be something about both of them that turns the other on right?" started Yesung.
"Right, we need a list of that. Wonnie notepad!" demanded Heechul as Siwon rushed to his room, returning with his pink notepad and pen.
"Alright everyone think. What are Kyumin's turn-ons?" asked Heechul seriously, looking like he was ready for a long lecture.
"Well, I catch Kyu staring at Sungmin's butt often, but he does it off camera. Well actually Sungmin does it too," piped Yesung.
"And don't forget their hair, they're very touchy touchy when it comes to each other's hair," added Ryeowook.
"Don't forget candy, especially lollipops. Hyunnie's imagination goes wild when he sees Sungmin sucking on them," replied Shindong.
"How would you know?" came Donghae's voice.
"I heard him. Once. By accident. In the bathroom. Me and him were the ones home at that time," answered the chubby man.
"Okay back to the list. What else?" asked Heechul.
"Their thighs! Both of them are turned on each other's thighs I swear!" blurted Donghae.
"And how would you know?" asked Eunhyuk suspisciously.
"Don't you see them? Everytime one of them's in skinny jeans, the other's practically drooling!" flailed the younger.
"How about their voices? Kyuhyun's is sensuous while Sungmin-hyung's is sweet," added Siwon.
"Eyeliner, for sure eyeliner, you don't know how many times they were secretly looking at each other with that stuff on," answered Eunhyuk.
"Their tongues, man they're always caught sticking out of their mouths in some sort of comprimising expression," replied Heechul.
"Okay so what do we have so far?" Leeteuk spoke after a while.
"Butts, hair, lollipops, thighs, voices, eyeliner, tongues. What else are we missing?" asked Heechul as he scratched his head with his pen.
"You forgot something important," stated Leeteuk.
"What?" blurted the others at once.
Leeteuk smiled his greasy smile, and replied:
"Well, what do couples love to do that leads to sex in the first place?"
They all nodded in agreement, and answered at the same time, "Kiss!"
"Their lips!" answered Ryeowook.
"I'm surprised we forgot!" piped Donghae.
"Kyuhyun's full ones and Sungmin-hyung's heart ones, they're a perfect match!" exclaimed Siwon.
"Alright then, I think we're done with the turn-ons," stated Heechul as he flipped to a new page.
"Now for the fun part: turn-offs. Let's hear 'em!" demanded a very enthusiastic Heechul.
"Well, Kyubaby's not a fan of plushies, especially bunnies. Oh and shopping," started Leeteuk
"And Min hates Starcraft, no wait he doesn't he plays it now too! But he does get annoyed when Kyu ignores him for Starcraft!" blurted Donghae.
"Minnie loves sweets and strawberries while Kyu hates them!" added Shindong.
"They hate it when the other tries to do aegyo," stated Yesung.
"Kyu can't stand the sight of pink!" exclaimed Ryeowook.
"Kyuhyun's on the lazy side, so Sungmin-hyung hates it when he has to nag him to do something, oh and Kyu hates being nagged," replied Siwon knowingly.
"Ok we've got quite a list, but I feel like something's missing," stated Heechul as he stared at his list, trying to find the one main Kyumin turn-off.
Plushies, shopping, Starcraft, sweets, strawberries, aegyo, pink, nagging and being nagged at. What else? Think Chullie think.
"I've got it!" exclaimed Heechul as he flipped to a new page and scribbled his answer down.
This, this is the ultimate turn-off, Heechul told himself proudly.
"What? What is it?!" shreaked Leeteuk.
"Spit it out hyung!" snapped Eunhyuk.
"Really, Chullie, what is it, we're all anticipating your answer, since it requires a new page," Siwon stated, trying not to whine.
"This," Heechul started, "is the ultimate turn-off." With a dramatic flip, he turned his notepad around, revealing his answer.
"Oh," started Shindong.
"My," continued Eunhyuk.
"Gosh. Why didn't we think of it before?" asked Ryeowook.
"Yeah, it's the most obvious one too!" exclaimed Donghae.
There, on Heechul's notepad, in giant letters, was Kyumin's main turn-off.
PIMPLES.
"Chullie, you're a genius!" exclaimed Siwon as he kissed Heechul's cheek passionately.
"You realize that now?" scoffed Heechul.
"Ok Heechul, we have their turn ons and turn offs. Now what?" asked their leader.
"Now we can put my plan into action!" boomed the younger.
"What plan?" questioned the others.
Heechul smirked, then answered:
"Operation: Turn-Off."
TBC~
A/N: Amazing what one mug of coffee can do to a person, ehh?
Ok, I'm not really much of a coffee person, but when you have to wake up at 6 so you can get to school by 7, caffeine does help to go that extra mile.
As for school, today was just pre-registration, but I only have a week left till school officially starts, which means I'm gonna have less time to write...again T_T
This sucks, since I just started my chaptered fic, but after school starts I'm gonna have to update it even slower. Plus, since it's my last year in high school, this year matters more than anything. My future pretty much starts off in grade 12...
Well, onto happier thoughts. I actually got this idea a while ago, but I didn't know how to put it together. Who knew caffeine would kick start it again? xDDD
Maybe I should drink coffee more often, nae?
Also, since we're all ELFs, and ELF is one giant family, I wanna get to know all you shippers out there, so visit this entry to tell me a bit about yourself. It can be one word or one paragraph, w.e you like:
I never really got to introduce myself, so here's my chance, and plus I'm kinda bored.
Anyway, see you soon!
<3 Liz
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