Your Bet's as Good as Mine (7/16)
Title: Your Bet's as Good as Mine (7/16)
Pairing: Yunho/Changmin
Words: 5,013
Beta: chibisuz <3
Warnings: mentions of past domestic violence, slight dub con
Rating: NC-17
Comments are love ^^
Yunho was insatiable.
Changmin didn’t know what he expected, but it sure as fuck wasn’t this. He should’ve known too, from the rumors that used to float around, but he hadn’t prepared himself well enough.
The man never got tired. Changmin didn’t know how he did it. He never had to initiate sex, because Yunho was always the first one to reach for Changmin. They’ve had sex in almost every bathroom on campus, sex at home and sex in the shower because it wasn’t enough for Yunho that he had just fucked him senseless in bed not twenty minutes ago. Morning, afternoon, night, that time in between because, pfft, what is timing?
Changmin wasn’t complaining though. It was a win-win situation for both, because Changmin had a hard time keeping his hands off too. He has never desired someone so much, been desired so much in return, and gave as good as he got. The ache in his backside was a little tough to get used to, but he figured it was worth it.
Although slightly wary at first, Changmin eventually let Yunho in. They had known each other for a couple of months now, but Changmin hadn’t really shared a lot of personal information with Yunho.
Now though, Changmin found himself more comfortable with letting Yunho see more of him, and not just in a physical sense. He opened up to Yunho in a way he hadn’t with anyone else so quickly. Sure, there were Minho and Kyuhyun, but it had taken him almost a full year to actually consider them friends and then treat them as such.
With Yunho though, he found it wasn’t hard to share.Although the sex was always mind blowing and left him somewhat dumb and speechless, he found himself looking forward to the afterglow, when Yunho would demand to be cuddled or hold Changmin in his arms, and they would talk in hushed voices about everything and anything in the quiet of his bedroom. Yunho would glide his hands lightly across the plains of his body, caressing here and there, something that he discovered Changmin reacted deliciously to. After a while Changmin realized that although he liked talking to Yunho, he liked listening to Yunho just as much. Yunho’s voice adopted a sexy roughness after sex, and he wouldn’t have minded hearing him talk all night, no matter if Yunho was being silly or serious.
When they lay next to each other and everything was calm and unrushed, he told Yunho about his family; about his father who owned a chain of convenience stores and his mother who made the best food in the world, and his two younger sisters who he wasn’t a very good brother to when he was younger but who still supported him when he came out to his family.
When Yunho asked if his parents accepted him, Changmin told him that while they had been shocked at first, and became a little cold, they immediately came to his defense and support when that whole thing with his ex had happened, because after all, he was their child.
Yunho was silent for a few moments, and Changmin let him stew, curious to see if he would ask the question that was obviously burning at him.
“I’m glad they came around and support you now,” Yunho said after a while.
Changmin knew he wanted to ask about his ex again, but Yunho didn’t, and Changmin appreciated that he didn’t push him to talk. He would talk to Yunho about it one day, but today wasn’t it.
“Yeah me too. What about you?”
Yunho was quiet for a moment, seeming to think about it.
“Hm, I never really said anything to my parents about it. It was like they just knew. They never bothered me about it. I guess they just accepted it as another of my quirks, which I think is great.”
“Really?” Changmin said, turning in his arms to look at him. “They let you do whatever you wanted?”
Yunho grinned. “Well they stayed away from my personal life, because I did good in school, but if I did something wrong of course they interfered. And wrong as in trouble in school and whatnot. They were cool with everything else though, because they thought I was an adult and deserved to make and learn from my own mistakes. I used to get in a lot of fights though.”
“Oh, I’ll bet,” Changmin said, laughing.
“Hey, it was to break up other people!”
“And you just had to throw in a couple punches yourself to straighten them out, didn’t you?”
“You brat,” Yunho growled, pouncing on him as Changmin laughed.
***
But Yunho was never in bed with him when he woke up in the mornings. Changmin had yet to wake up with the other man sleeping next to him. Yunho always came in after he had gotten up, carrying coffee and donuts and an assortment of other food, even when Changmin told him he was perfectly capable of making breakfast. Yunho just smiled and fed him a donut.
Although he knew it was stupid, it worried him a bit, that Yunho maybe couldn't stand to be in bed with him if it wasn't for sex, despite all the other evidence to the contrary, and when he couldn’t take torturing himself with useless thoughts anymore, he asked Yunho.
Yunho shrugged and smiled. “Force of habit, I’m sorry. Does it bother you?”
“You have a habit of waking before six and going for a walk? What kind of a college student are you?”
A smile tugged at Yunho’s lips at that. “Very funny. I like getting up early. There’s no one else around and I can think in peace and watch the world brighten. It’s very calming. Does it bother you?” he asked again, watching him.
It did, just a bit, but not as much now that he knew why. Changmin shook his head. “No, I was just wondering. I mean, I’d like to wake up next to you, but whatever makes you happy.” He looked at Yunho thoughtfully. “You’re very…”
“Unique? Different? Amazing? Perfect?” Yunho offered.
Changmin laughed. “No, you’re weird,” he teased.
Yunho pouted.
Changmin chuckled and leaned in to peck his lips. “I was gonna say peculiar, but unique works I suppose.”
Yunho brightened and then proceeded to eat his lips, because when you gave Yunho an inch he took a mile.
***
Too much of a good thing is too much of a good thing, Changmin thought as he stared at his most recent exam grade with a morose expression.
He was spending way too much time with Yunho. If he wasn't in class, then he was with Yunho, either in the library in their corner or at home in his own apartment. He didn't study as much as he used to, and it showed in his grades. Yunho had told him the other day he had received a B on one of his papers, and Changmin knew it was because of all the time they spent together. Yunho was a straight A student, just like Changmin, but together they bought the other down, and Changmin knew they had to stop.
Not only that, but he hadn't been seeing Kyuhyun and Minho like he used to. Sure the group still had lunch together everyday, but an hour wasn't nearly enough. He could tell his friends didn't appreciate being pushed aside, but they weren't saying anything because they were his friends, and understood that being in a relationship after so long was a big deal for him.
Changmin still felt guilty though. Kyuhyun had taken to spending a couple nights a week at Minho's dorm, so Changmin and Yunho could be alone. He was extremely grateful for how understanding his best friends were being, but that didn't mean he could take advantage. Kyuhyun did live here, after all.
Right then and there, Changmin decided to talk to Yunho about this before their relationship completely cut off his friends.
It was one of the rare days Yunho wasn't at his apartment, having gone back to Gwangju to visit his family for the weekend.
Grabbing his phone, he sent him a text.
Sent to Man Candy 12:07 PM
Yunho
Received from Man Candy 12:08 PM
yes baby :)
Sent to Man Candy 12:09 PM
I got an 88 on my exam
Received from Man Candy 12:09 PM
um good job?
Sent to Man Candy 12:10 PM
NO NOT GOOD JOB THIS IS TERRIBLE
Sent to Man Candy 12:10 PM
This is really bad. I haven't been studying at all
Received from Man Candy 12:11 PM
me neither
Sent to Man Candy 12:12 PM
We need to stop spending so much time together
Received from Man Candy 12:12 PM
i dont want to :(
Changmin smiled at his phone.
Sent to Man Candy 12:13 PM
Me neither but its affecting our grades
Received from Man Candy 12:14 PM
lets just drop out of school
Sent to Man Candy 12:14 PM
????
Received from Man Candy 12:15 PM
so we can focus on our relationship w/o any distractions :DDDDD
Sent to Man Candy 12:16 PM
It's usually the other way around. People drop relationships so they can focus on school -_-
Received from Man Candy 12:16 PM
ppl dont no anything about life
Sent to Man Candy 12:17 PM
Oh and you do?
Received from Man Candy 12:18 PM
yeah the purpose of life is to love and make love
Changmin's heart may or may not have skipped a few beats; trust Yunho to be so cheesy. But what did he mean? Was that a confession of some sort?
Sent to Man Candy 12:20 PM
You're such a sap. Is love supposed to pay the bills and buy me expensive things?
Received from Man Candy 12:21 PM
dw pretty baby i'll pay ur bills n buy u expensive things
Damn it, the man seriously knew how to make him feel warm.
Sent to Man Candy 12:22 PM
With what job?
Received from Man Candy 12:22 PM
dont u worry ur pretty little mind, i'll take care of all of that
Sent to Man Candy 12:23 PM
I'm very high maintenance
Received from Man Candy 12:23 PM
i know -_-
Changmin giggled; he loved buying clothes and eating, and Yunho had spoiled him, taking him shopping whenever he wanted, and indulging him in his crazy food addictions, no matter the time.
Sent to Man Candy 12:24 PM
You don't have to buy me things all the time you know
Received from Man Candy 12:25 PM
its ok, i want to
Changmin thought maybe he wanted to marry Yunho.
Sent to Man Candy 12:25 PM
Well if you insist...
Received from Man Candy 12:26 PM
i do insist. dw i’ll make sure ur never in need of anything
Okay, now THAT meant he was already planning for the future right? Changmin knew Yunho was teasing him, but just the fact that the thought of a future together had been through Yunho's mind was more than enough to make him happy.
He was getting ahead of himself though. It was best to stay clear away from any talk of the future.
Yunho, as always, was very impatient.
Received from Man Candy 12:28 PM
changmin?
Sent to Man Candy 12:28 PM
Jeez can you be just a little patient? And you're making me sound like a trophy wife -_-
Received from Man Candy 12:29 PM
well if u wanna be my trophy wife i have no objections :DDDD
Sent to Man Candy 12:30 PM
I'm a boy!!
Received from Man Candy 12:30 PM
u certainly are, and a big boy at that ;) but ur a pretty boy
Sent to Man Candy 12:31 PM
-_- You're a pervert
Received from Man Candy 12:32 PM
im just appreciating every inch of my baby ;)
Sent to Man Candy 12:33 PM
Stop calling me your baby
Received from Man Candy 12:33 PM
but ur mine
Fuck. Changmin tried not to feel giddy, because Shim Changmin does not do giddy.
Sent to Man Candy 12:33 PM
Excuse me perverted ahjussi I belong to myself
Received from Man Candy 12:34 PM
nope mine n only mine
Received from Man Candy 12:34 PM
sorry pretty baby i have to go, ttyl k?
Sent to Man Candy 12:35 PM
STOP CALLING ME PRETTY BABY
Received from Man Candy 12:35 PM
:DDDDDDD
Changmin rolled his eyes; he was liking the name too much, and that was entirely unacceptable.
***
When Yunho came back, they agreed to separate just a little. Yunho still came to the library to study with him, but he sat across from him and not next to him, which seemed to have been the cause of most of their inability to study.
Changmin's grades were important to him, which helped him focus even with Yunho near him. Their library time was now spent actually studying or getting homework done. Changmin found he didn't mind the silence; instead he actually loved it. Yunho's steady presence was quiet but comforting, and Changmin found he would reach for Yunho's hand once in a while just to hold it.
Yunho would take five-minute breaks every couple ofhours, going out to smoke. Changmin didn't like it, but he didn't want to tell Yunho what he could and couldn't do. Yunho was an adult, and aware of the consequences of smoking; he didn't need Changmin to nag at him, and Changmin had no wish to give Yunho a reason to resent him. He wasn’t a heavy smoker, not at all, but it still wasn’t healthy. He'd just have to find a creative way to get Yunho to smoke less.
Yunho took to spending Friday and Saturday nights at his apartment, the days Kyuhyun usually wasn't home anyway.
Changmin spent more time with his friends, accepting their half joking, half not comments on his betrayal, but they soon got over it and went back to normal. Changmin didn't realize how much he missed them and their easy friendship until they were once again laughing and playing video games together.
When Changmin's next exam grade came in, he smiled as he looked down at the 97; he couldn't remember the last time he had felt so satisfied with his life.
***
“Are the rumors about you true?” Changmin asked in as casual a tone as he could muster while idly tracing patterns on Yunho’s chest with his finger.
“What rumors?” Yunho said, voice low and on the verge of sleep.
Changmin propped his chin on Yunho’s soft chest. “About how you used to have sex with someone different every night.”
Unexpectedly, Yunho chuckled, then groaned when Changmin licked a nipple. "Is that what they say?"
Changmin stopped his licking and looked up. "It's not true?"
Yunho scoffed. "Hardly," he said, and then gently pressed Changmin's head down, urging him to lick again.
Changmin indulged him for a bit, gently licking the hardening bud and then sucking and biting. He felt Yunho’s moan rumble in his chest, a deep sound that made shivers run through him. It didn’t distract him from what he wanted to know though; he stopped with his ministrations and looked up, frowning, a feeling of cautious hope rising in his chest. "So...you didn't use to sleep around."
Yunho gave up on getting him to lick him into an orgasm. "No, not really. I mean, I'm young, I’ve had sex, but not as frequently as everyone seemed to believe. I guess it's because I always had people surrounding me at clubs. People thought I was taking them home."
There was no denying the warm feeling that spread through Changmin; he was secretly thrilled that the rumors weren't true, and that Yunho wasn't nearly as promiscuous as he was made out to be. There wasn’t anything wrong with that, of course; he was just an insanely possessive person and the thought of other people touching his Yunho made him see red, even if it was before he had even met the man.
“But then where did your reputation come from? Why do you have it when it’s not true?”
Yunho opened his eyes and stared at him. Changmin felt his cheeks heat up from the intense gaze, not sure if he had said something wrong, though he didn’t look away. Just when he was about to open to his mouth to ask Yunho what was wrong, Yunho smiled and his face relaxed, and whatever wild thought he’d been having passed. “I suspect most of it is Heechul and Donghae and Siwon’s fault. In high school they encouraged me to try some stuff, so I did. They exaggerated what I did do because they thought it would be fun and made me out to be some sort of sex god, but it stuck, and the rumors followed me here.”
"So then...does it bother you? That people say those things about you?"
Yunho was silent for a while, appraising Changmin curiously. Changmin almost asked again what was wrong, because he was sure he wasn’t saying anything offensive, but Yunho spoke again. "I'd be lying if I said it didn't. I don't like that people think I'm all about sex. They think that way, so they come to me with that intention. And even if I find them attractive, I can't do anything about it because they only think about sex. It's really...discouraging. I don't know how to fix it anymore so I don't even try." Yunho stopped, then sighed. "No one thinks about a relationship with me because of my reputation, they don’t wanna be with someone who they think has been with so many other people," he finished quietly.
Changmin's heart clenched painfully at the disappointment and resignation in Yunho's voice. He wrapped his arms around him tightly and kissed his cheek. "I don’t think that’s what they cared about. I think it’s because they didn’t think you could commit to a relationship, and that’s why they didn’t even give you a chance.” Yunho scrunched his nose and pursed his lips, thinking about what Changmin said. His small, slow nod let Changmin know that he understood. Changmin smiled and kissed him again. “Besides, it’s alright, they don't know what they're missing.”
Yunho shifted and looked at him, smiling softly at him, a fondness in his eyes that made Changmin swallow.
The smile took on a sudden glint in his eyes. "Why? Were you jealous?"
Changmin scowled. "Of course not."
"Yeah you were," Yunho teased.
"Just go to sleep," Changmin huffed.
Yunho chuckled in his ears, but obeyed and closed his eyes.
Changmin stayed awake, thinking.
So Yunho’s reputation was misconstrued. That made so much sense. After he had gotten to know him, Changmin had a hard time fitting the Yunho he knew with the rumors he had heard. The bad rumors, anyway. Changmin knew Yunho was studious (when he wasn’t trying to eat Changmin), he took care of those younger than him, he stayed up late when freshmen and sophomores asked for his help, but most of all, Yunho was kind.
The Yunho he knew wouldn’t flit from person to person. He had to settle for finding release somewhere, but he could hardly be blamed when he didn’t have any other option.
That also explained Yunho’s willingness to indulge Changmin with whatever he wanted. No one had ever given him a chance to show his sincerity, so he took care to make sure Changmin felt it, even if he never said anything outright. It showed in the small things he did, like bringing him breakfast, knowing his favorite foods, talking to him because he somehow knew that Changmin wanted to hear his voice.
No, Yunho was a much better person than the rumors made him out to be, and Changmin decided right then and there he would never give those rumors any credence. Satisfied, he snuggled closer to Yunho and fell asleep.
***
“So I’m curious about something.”
“What?”
“How many nose jobs have you gotten?”
Yunho stared, and then burst out laughing. “What? How many nose jobs?”
Changmin cocked his head to the side and pursed his lips. He didn’t like being laughed at, and just now he realized how dumb his question might be, but he was curious all the same. He knew Yunho couldn’t resist kissing him when he did that.
Yunho did exactly that. “You’re so cute,” he said, pressing kiss after kiss on his lips.
“Well? Answer my question!” Changmin whined into his mouth.
“Changminnie. I didn’t get any nose jobs.”
“I don’t believe you.”
Yunho frowned. “Here, you can touch it,” Yunho said, sticking his nose out.
Changmin touched it, and then bent it to the side just to make sure. “That’s not fair! How come everything of yours is perfect?”
Yunho looked surprised, and then his eyes gleamed. “Everything of mine is perfect?”
Oops. Did he really say that out loud?
Well. There was nothing to do but accept it.
“That includes your boyfriend,” he said, sticking his tongue out at him.
Something unreadable passed through his features, and then Yunho smiled and kissed him, more slowly than before. “Yes, you are.”
***
He knew his relationship with Yunho was approaching the next level when the thought of his ex didn't hurt as much.
Laying one night with Yunho spooning him, he thought about all the ways Yunho was different from his ex.
Yunho seemed to pick up on his serious mood. Stroking his hand up and down Changmin’s side, waist to hip and down to thighs before coming up again, he asked, “Changmin?”
“Mmm?”
“What are you thinking about?” he murmured against Changmin’s nape.
He was a silent for a moment, contemplating whether he wanted to trust Yunho so fully. And after thinking about all the things Yunho had shared with him, about Yunho's honesty in everything, and how he never kept anything from him, Changmin thought maybe it was time he started showing Yunho that same kind of trust. It had been about a month since they got together, almost three since they met, and yet Yunho had never been dishonest with him. Thinking about all of this, he answered truthfully, "My ex."
Yunho's hand on his side stilled, as if surprised, but then he resumed his stroking. "Why?"
The question threw Changmin off guard. He shifted slightly. "Why? Because I can, I guess."
His answer seemed to confuse Yunho. "Because you can? Why couldn't you before?"
"Because it was hard to."
"Oh."
Yunho didn't say anything more. He just kept sliding his hand up and down Changmin's side, occasionally mouthing the back of his neck. Changmin waited another ten minutes to see if he would ask, but he didn't. Grateful for his patience, Changmin took a deep breath and lay out his heart for Yunho to see.
"It was really nice, in the beginning," he exhaled on a shaky breath. Yunho continued his ministrations, and Changmin was grateful for his quiet comfort. "I was 16 and he was 17. He was sweet and treated me nicely. I don't think he was lying when he said he loved me. I had my first time with him and it was...nice. He didn't hurt me and looked after me."
Changmin fell silent, waiting to see if Yunho would egg him on, but Yunho only waited patiently.
"He became...weird. He didn't like seeing me with other people. I used to be really shy and didn't have a lot of friends, but he introduced me to his group and we got along well. We would hang out a lot, and I was actually happy in high school for the first time. But then after a while he would get angry when I told him I was going to hang out with his friends when he had exams and had to study. He said I was his boyfriend so there was no reason for me to be out with his friends when he wasn't even there, and he would always make up excuses for why I couldn't go. I had exams, why wasn't I studying? Stuff like that.
"And I was so stupid. I did what he said, because he was older so he would know, right? He took advantage of my naivety and kept me from hanging out with anyone who wasn't him. I was okay with it, because I was soo in love," Changmin said, voice full of self-mockery. Yunho took his hand and squeezed it slightly. Changmin sighed. "But he got worse. I would see him eying other guys, and when I worked up the courage to confront him about it he turned it around on me, talking about all the ways I hurt him, and somehow I was the one who ended up apologizing. It went on for so many months, and I became so unhappy that I hated anyone who laughed around me. He started hurting me during sex too, always taking what he wanted and leaving."
Yunho still hadn't interrupted him, but Changmin could feel the way his body tensed up. And maybe it was wrong, but he felt a tiny spark of happiness at Yunho's anger, because he was angry for Changmin.
"The first time I refused to have sex he hit me."
Behind him Yunho sucked in a breath.
"I was so shocked I quickly apologized to him and let him take me. And then just because it gave him pleasure, he hit me randomly, for no reason at all. I think it may have been at this point that I began to hate him, but at the time I didn't even consider breaking up, because I couldn't imagine myself without him. Towards the beginning of our relationship I had come out to my parents, thinking I had his support. But at this time they began to pick up on my unhappiness. I think they saw my bruises a couple times too. They questioned me, and I lied and told them everything was okay and I was just stressed about school or whatever. They kept at it though, and eventually I just...I broke, I guess. I was so relieved to know they still cared about me, because I thought they hated me after finding out I was gay. That time period was so hard, Yunho, because he was always hurting me and I didn't have any friends to talk to and I couldn't burden my little sisters like that and my parents became so cold. But when they kept asking I started to cry and told them what had been happening and they just...Yunho I honestly think they saved my life. If my parents hadn't intervened I would've let him kill me."
Yunho had stopped moving a while ago, completely still as he listened, and now he made a sound, and Changmin turned his head to look at him. The emotions he saw in Yunho's eyes took his breath away. There was rage and fear and concern and just...fierce, fierce protectiveness, all swirling into a hurricane in those beautiful almond shaped eyes.
"He hurt you," Yunho said, and his voice was so strangled with emotion Changmin felt his own heart clench painfully. He turned around fully and circled his arms around Yunho's neck, leaning in to kiss his lips fiercely. Yunho kissed him back just as desperately, arms tightening around his waist as if to reassure himself that Changmin was here, he was now, he was okay and no one would hurt him.
He broke off, looking at Yunho and feeling just a bit overwhelmed by the intensity with which Yunho was gazing back. Changmin stroked a hand through Yunho's hair, and then said, "Don't worry. My parents stopped it before anything serious could have happened. They forced me to break up with him, and when he wouldn't back away they called the police on him. They got me to see a therapist and transferred me to another school, and that's where I met Kyuhyun and Minho."
He paused, looking down and lightly dragging his fingers across Yunho's chest, almost absentmindedly. "Of course at the time I was furious with my parents. I didn't want them to interfere, because I was a dumb teenager and it's, you know, my life. I was so angry at them, but then when I had been away from him long enough, I started to think about it all. And a little at a time, I came to accept that he had mistreated me and I didn't deserve any of that. I wasn't that much happier, but I was a little bit...calmer? At peace with myself? Yeah, life was okay. It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad and that was good. Eventually I apologized to my parents for being such a brat and they apologized for being so unsupportive in the beginning. I suppose the one good thing that came out of all that shit was my relationship with my parents. I know that if I introduced you to them they would be thrilled to meet you."
He stopped talking and looked back at Yunho. Yunho's lips were pursed, as if he was thinking hard. After a while, he kissed Changmin and bought his hand up to caress his face. "I'm so glad you're okay and here with me now," he said to him, eyes filled with warmth.
Changmin blinked. Damn Yunho. His eyes were definitely not watering.
He let out a shaky laugh. "You must think I'm so dumb. Needing my parent's help to get out of such a typical failed teenage relationship."
Yunho shook his head and pressed a finger to his lips. "Hurt is hurt, Changmin, no matter what form it comes in. And none of it is ever okay."
Yunho leaned in closer and kissed his nose.
"I won't let anyone hurt you again. Ever," he whispered fiercely against his cheek.
Changmin swallowed, trying to get rid of the lump in his throat.
And you? Will you hurt me?
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