Snippet: Into the Black
What was it like?
Same as before.
Help me out here, Starsky: I’m trying to understand.
I told you.
You told me. When?
You remember that time?
What time? Oh. The hit? Yeah, I remember.
Right. So, it was like that. More or less.
Tell me again.
If I have to. Everything went dark, and my only thoughts were “I’m going into the black”, and that I had no other thoughts. Okay?
Nothing else? You weren’t scared? No white light? No loved ones waiting?
No. I told you! It was very peaceful.
But this was different. This time, you just…
What? Went to sleep?
Yeah. Went in your sleep.
How’s that different?
For one thing, you didn’t wake up again.
Smart ass.
Okay, you didn’t have a reason to die.
Of course I had a reason. Everyone has a reason - that’s why they die.
So, what was your reason?
Hm. I don’t know - I guess it was just my time, ya know?
That’s not a reason, that’s a piss-poor Zen excuse.
You’ve been skipping your anger management classes again, haven’t you, Hutch?
We don’t have those in here, moron - just basket-weaving and bingo.
It’s not that bad and you know it.
I know, I know - it could be worse. I could be…
What? Hey, don’t hold back on my account, pal.
Okay, then. I could be dead.
And what’s worse about being dead?
Not being alive?
What’s so good about being alive?
Not being dead.
Don’t knock it if you ain’t tried it, partner. From where I sit, seeing as I’ve been both sides of the fence, this is pretty good over here.
Yeah? How so? I’m alive, you’re dead. You lived your swinging years and paid the price, and I’m destined for my hundred and forty.
Eight. Hundred and forty eight. But that’s beside the point. Quality, Hutch, it’s all about quality. I’m glad my number came up early: no playing bingo with a bunch of old farts, no pills four meals a day, no shitting in a diaper. Nope: gone in the prime of my life, just like that.
And no chance for your loved ones to say “good-bye.”
Well, no, there was that. Couldn’t be helped. Is that what this is about? You wanted to say “good-bye”, so you dragged me in here?
No, actually, I wanted to say “hello.” I’m coming with you. Into the black.
“Mr Hutchinson. Wake up, honey, it’s time for your obs. Mr Hutchinson? Wake up, darling… Doctor!”