Dinner Gone Wrong
Title: Dinner Gone Wrong
Pairing: Hanhae (Ninja!Heechul)
Rating: G
Genre: Crack
Summary: What happens when dinner goes wrong?
A/N: You know it! Dedicated to ALL Hanhae lovers of course! Enjoy! =)
“Nguh.” Hankyung heaved from the effort he had to use to drag himself from the bathroom to his bed. He had no idea how lucky he was to have a bathroom in his room until now.
He had been having diarrhoea since yesterday night and he half reckoned it had something to do with the fried rice Donghae had made for him for dinner. His boyfriend had pestered him to teach him how to cook that simple delicacy and had been eager to present his skills the moment he learnt it.
“Hannie!”
Donghae had opened Hankyung’s door without knocking as always, to find him on the floor dragging himself towards his bed in a rather awkward position.
“Are you all right?” Donghae asked with concern pooling deep in his eyes.
“Not at all.” Hankyung managed a weak reply.
“What happened? Why are you on the floor?”
”I’ve been having diarrhoea since yesterday night. I don’t think I have any energy left.” Hankyung said and let himself fall into his boyfriend’s arms.
“Since yesterday night?!” Donghae panicked. He could get dehydrated. “I’ll go get you some water.”
“No -“
Hankyung’s words were cut off as he stumbled to the floor when his boyfriend moved to get water.
In the kitchen
Donghae was thinking maybe it could be the fried rice he’d made for Hankyung yesterday that was causing the diarrhoea. He was looking over at the sauces and seasonings he’d used. Just when he was picking up the salt container to inspect the integrity of the salt, Heechul burst out.
“Ah! There’s my laxative!” He said in a sing song voice and snatched over the container in Donghae’s hands. “Thanks!”
Donghae stared wide eyed at him. “La -laxative?”
“Yeah, I was constipated. So I went to get some over-the-counter laxative.” With that, he pranced off.
Donghae found himself stunned. “Why did you put something like that in the kitchen?!” He shouted after Heechul. Hannie will kill me if he found out.
Hankyung had taken long enough to drag himself from the floor onto the bed and laid on his left in a fetal position but Donghae still wasn’t back yet. Just when that thought was floating around his mind, he heard a creak from the door. The familiar padding of footsteps and the deep sunk of his bed behind him confirmed the intruder’s identity.
“Where’s the water?”
“…”
“Hae?”
Hankyung felt a slender arm wrapped around his waist and hot breath at his neck. Donghae rained kisses on Hankyung’s neck before resting his face on top of Hankyung’s head and cuddled close. Hankyung figured that could after all be what he needed right now since the constant visit to the bathroom had left him in cold sweat. He let out a contented sigh.
“Hannie?”
“Yeah?”
“Did the fried rice I made yesterday tasted funny?”
“Hm. It’s not salty enough. But otherwise, everything else is all right.” Hankyung paused. “I thought you’d already asked me that yesterday?”
“Hannie…”
“Yeah?” Hankyung was confused. Why was Donghae’s arm around his waist wrapping tighter around him as each moment passed? And why was he asking such questions?
“I forgot to put salt yesterday.”
Hankyung released a breath. So that was what all the anxiety in his tone was about. He almost laughed at his boyfriend for being so worried about him being angry when all he’d done was only forgot the salt. He had wanted to comment something when Donghae’s voice came again.
“It was laxative that I’d added in instead.” This time the arm around his waist tightened immediately, almost suffocating him. It’s as if Donghae had wanted to prevent him from pouncing onto him in anger.
Hankyung was having mixed feelings. He wanted to scream at Donghae for causing his state but another feeling immediately took over and it was even more overwhelming.
“Hae -“ Hankyung gave a strangled cry.
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it! Heechul put that laxative there and I thought it was salt. It’s not entirely my fault. There wasn’t even a label on it so I thought that’s salt.” Donghae was still hanging on tight.
“Hae -“ Hankyung was struggling in his hold. “Let me go.”
“Please don’t kill me! Hannnniiieee!”
Hankyung used the last of his energy and broke free from Donghae. He charged for the bathroom and slammed the door behind him. Donghae sat up in the bed and heard what sounded like the slam of the lid over the toilet seat and the shuffling of clothes as if pants were being yanked down.
“Oh… Oops.” Donghae realised he’d just delayed his boyfriend’s emptying of bowel. “Are you feeling okay, Hannie?” He asked sweetly trying to test if Hankyung was angry at him.
“Don’t talk to me, Hae. The last thing I want to hear now is your voice.” There came Hankyung’s strangled reply.
Donghae pouted. Hankyung’s angry all right. But he couldn’t blame him could he? If Hankyung had done the same thing to him, he’d be sure to have his boyfriend castrated. Donghae let out a heavy sigh.
“No more cooking of fried rice for you anymore.” Hankyung’s voice doesn’t sound as strained as before.
“…”
“Can I make kimchi next time then?”
END--