cooking disasters.
Fandom: Naruto
Characters: Hyuuga Neji & Haruno Sakura & Nara Shikamaru
Table & Prompt: t8, p15. take out
Word Count: 1253
Rating: T
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Notes: Written for 3 way. Prompt table is here.
-
“Sakura-chan? Why don’t we ever have dinner at your place?”
The pink haired medic froze in her seat across from Naruto. She snuck a glance at the two men sitting on either side of her, but they remained as nonchalant as ever, much to her dismay. A delicate blush spread over her face as she struggled to find a viable excuse. “W-well...”
“Oh! I know!” Naruto cut her off, pieces of ramen spewing out of his mouth. “I bet it’s because none of you three genii can cook!” The joking grin was noticeably present on his face as he said this, the soup drooling from a corner of his mouth. However, when the three genii in question did not look at all amused, his own grin faded, replaced by a confused look.
“...Seriously? I was only kidding...”
By now, the three had stopped eating to stare at the soon-to-be-Rokudaime. The man on Sakura’s left shifted in his seat uncomfortably, his pearl orbs glaring at the blond. The other, on Sakura’s left, only sighed in response, leaning back in his chair.
The next few minutes were ones Naruto wished he had caught on camera.
Shikamaru, in all his lazy stupor, had explained first, much to Naruto’s surprise. The lazy genius had deemed it to be “too troublesome” to deal with. He didn’t see why cooking was necessary when take out or eating out was still an option. Neji, the almighty Hyuuga heir with a slight superiority complex declared, quite stoically that he was a shinobi, not a goddamned chef. It wasn’t like he had time to make gourmet meals when fighting off S-Classed nukenin.
Sakura though, was a complete contrast from her two lovers. She had blushed furiously, and after a few seconds of embarrassment, replied hotly that ‘even though her food was always burnt, it was very much edible, thank you very much’.
Naruto, upon witnessing the three slightly, and in Sakura’s case very flustered shinobi, did the only thing that came to mind: burst into a fit of hysterical laughter.
-
“Neji-kun. Shika-kun. We are not going to be laughed at by Naruto, for God’s sake.” Sakura said, face still slightly flushed from their earlier conversation. “And for our cooking skills, no less!”
The two men stared back at her while she paced around their beige coloured living room. They agreed, of course. As much as they respected the blonde, it was undignified to be laughed at by him for such simple matters. Sakura plopped down on the couch next to them, a contemplative expression adorning her face.
Neji and Shikamaru knew what she was thinking of doing. To Neji, cooking to prove Naruto wrong didn’t sound all that appealing. In fact, he thought wryly that he probably preferred having his ego marred just a bit instead of being blown to pieces by their dangerous cooking. He snuck a glance at Shikamaru, smirking when he saw the worried expression he wore. He would bet a piece of his precious hair that Shikamaru was thinking of the last time they attempted to cook.
Sakura, from her position at the left end of the couch watched their silent interaction with displeased eyes. She knew they were thinking of last time’s disastrous results. “Guys. I think we should cook to prove that idiot wrong,” she said, smiling innocently. Neji and Shikamaru stared back at her incredulously. She only smiled.
Neji opened his mouth to disprove, but stopped short when Sakura wedged herself between him and Shikamaru. “...please?”
Taking advantage of their momentary surprise, she snaked her arms through both theirs, the innocent smile never leaving her face. Neji almost cursed out loud. Sakura, it seemed, always got what she wanted.
“...fine.”
Her face brightened up immediately as she raced to the kitchen, the two men in tow. They exchanged yet another glance. It was going to be a long day, indeed.
-
“Okay...this goes where?” Sakura asked, brows knitted together in pent up frustration. Cooking was just so damn hard! When silence greeted her, she snapped her head to the right, where his almighty highness Neji was currently glaring at a potato. Or what was left of it, anyway.
It could’ve passed as mashed potato, save the bits and pieces of unidentified green that was mixed with it. Neji, it seemed, could Kaiten an enemy into the next country, but could not, for the life of him, figure out why each piece had to be chopped at that damned angle. There was a ‘thud’ as the knife Neji had held seconds ago joined his other knives above his spot in the kitchen. Sakura, upon seeing all her precious potatoes reduced to the mush, gasped in horror. “Neji-kun! What the hell?”
A snigger from their right brought both their attentions to the infamous lazy genius of Konoha. “You two are hopeless.”
“And you’re much better?” Sakura retorted dryly, pointing at the...soup that sat before him. In reality, it looked like nothing more than clumps of brown muck in a pot, with occasional green poking out. Shikamaru however, seemed triumphant enough.
“At least I figured out you were supposed to put water in when making soup.” Unlike you and Neji last time. Though it was unspoken, the two knew exactly of which humiliating moment the Nara was referring to. That day had indeed not been a very good one.
“So, since you’re so professional at this,” Neji continued, smirking slightly. “You won’t mind cooking dinner for us, would you?” Sakura, having guessed what he would say, had already begun playing her part. Whining, it seemed, worked wonders on the Nara.
“Oh, yes, Shika-kun.” She gushed out, smiling innocently. “You must. Since you are so good, we shouldn’t waste talent like yours.” Shikamaru backed away slowly, eyeing his lovers sceptically. It didn’t take a genius to figure out he’d landed himself in a very troublesome spot indeed.
“I-”
“-will gladly cook something delicious for us, right?” Shikamaru held up his hands in front of him defensively, protesting against their wishes. Neji and Sakura, however, seemed determined to win this. He backed up until his back hit the wall, cursing Naruto inwardly. This was all his fault. Him and his stupid questions.
“Okay, okay!” Shikamaru threw his hands up in defeat. “I’ll cook. Don’t blame me when you die of poisoning. Sakura, turn the stove on please.”
Sakura, being quite pleased with herself, walked over to the stove, reached her hand out to turn a knob when she stopped short and stared. And stared. And stared some more. She let out a nervous giggle. There were so many buttons and knobs! Which one was to turn it on...?
Pink brows knitted together in concentration as she studied each intently. It was useless. Every damn button looked the same. She straightened out again. She wasn’t a genius for nothing. Maybe, there was another way. A delighted smile spread across her face when an idea hit her. Yes! The stove was just fire. So, maybe if she Katon’d it...
Satisfied with her solution, she set out to make the seals for a small, small Katon jutsu...
-
Two hours later, the three, after a few...accidents, burns and explosions, slumped down in a pile, covered in unidentified substances- the manifest of their cooking. Sakura’s face held a sheepish expression, while Neji’s clearly said I-told-you-so. Shikamaru, on the other hand, had already started to make his way to the top drawer, where all their precious take out flyers were located.
“Sushi tonight, anyone?”
Characters: Hyuuga Neji & Haruno Sakura & Nara Shikamaru
Table & Prompt: t8, p15. take out
Word Count: 1253
Rating: T
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
Notes: Written for 3 way. Prompt table is here.
-
“Sakura-chan? Why don’t we ever have dinner at your place?”
The pink haired medic froze in her seat across from Naruto. She snuck a glance at the two men sitting on either side of her, but they remained as nonchalant as ever, much to her dismay. A delicate blush spread over her face as she struggled to find a viable excuse. “W-well...”
“Oh! I know!” Naruto cut her off, pieces of ramen spewing out of his mouth. “I bet it’s because none of you three genii can cook!” The joking grin was noticeably present on his face as he said this, the soup drooling from a corner of his mouth. However, when the three genii in question did not look at all amused, his own grin faded, replaced by a confused look.
“...Seriously? I was only kidding...”
By now, the three had stopped eating to stare at the soon-to-be-Rokudaime. The man on Sakura’s left shifted in his seat uncomfortably, his pearl orbs glaring at the blond. The other, on Sakura’s left, only sighed in response, leaning back in his chair.
The next few minutes were ones Naruto wished he had caught on camera.
Shikamaru, in all his lazy stupor, had explained first, much to Naruto’s surprise. The lazy genius had deemed it to be “too troublesome” to deal with. He didn’t see why cooking was necessary when take out or eating out was still an option. Neji, the almighty Hyuuga heir with a slight superiority complex declared, quite stoically that he was a shinobi, not a goddamned chef. It wasn’t like he had time to make gourmet meals when fighting off S-Classed nukenin.
Sakura though, was a complete contrast from her two lovers. She had blushed furiously, and after a few seconds of embarrassment, replied hotly that ‘even though her food was always burnt, it was very much edible, thank you very much’.
Naruto, upon witnessing the three slightly, and in Sakura’s case very flustered shinobi, did the only thing that came to mind: burst into a fit of hysterical laughter.
-
“Neji-kun. Shika-kun. We are not going to be laughed at by Naruto, for God’s sake.” Sakura said, face still slightly flushed from their earlier conversation. “And for our cooking skills, no less!”
The two men stared back at her while she paced around their beige coloured living room. They agreed, of course. As much as they respected the blonde, it was undignified to be laughed at by him for such simple matters. Sakura plopped down on the couch next to them, a contemplative expression adorning her face.
Neji and Shikamaru knew what she was thinking of doing. To Neji, cooking to prove Naruto wrong didn’t sound all that appealing. In fact, he thought wryly that he probably preferred having his ego marred just a bit instead of being blown to pieces by their dangerous cooking. He snuck a glance at Shikamaru, smirking when he saw the worried expression he wore. He would bet a piece of his precious hair that Shikamaru was thinking of the last time they attempted to cook.
Sakura, from her position at the left end of the couch watched their silent interaction with displeased eyes. She knew they were thinking of last time’s disastrous results. “Guys. I think we should cook to prove that idiot wrong,” she said, smiling innocently. Neji and Shikamaru stared back at her incredulously. She only smiled.
Neji opened his mouth to disprove, but stopped short when Sakura wedged herself between him and Shikamaru. “...please?”
Taking advantage of their momentary surprise, she snaked her arms through both theirs, the innocent smile never leaving her face. Neji almost cursed out loud. Sakura, it seemed, always got what she wanted.
“...fine.”
Her face brightened up immediately as she raced to the kitchen, the two men in tow. They exchanged yet another glance. It was going to be a long day, indeed.
-
“Okay...this goes where?” Sakura asked, brows knitted together in pent up frustration. Cooking was just so damn hard! When silence greeted her, she snapped her head to the right, where his almighty highness Neji was currently glaring at a potato. Or what was left of it, anyway.
It could’ve passed as mashed potato, save the bits and pieces of unidentified green that was mixed with it. Neji, it seemed, could Kaiten an enemy into the next country, but could not, for the life of him, figure out why each piece had to be chopped at that damned angle. There was a ‘thud’ as the knife Neji had held seconds ago joined his other knives above his spot in the kitchen. Sakura, upon seeing all her precious potatoes reduced to the mush, gasped in horror. “Neji-kun! What the hell?”
A snigger from their right brought both their attentions to the infamous lazy genius of Konoha. “You two are hopeless.”
“And you’re much better?” Sakura retorted dryly, pointing at the...soup that sat before him. In reality, it looked like nothing more than clumps of brown muck in a pot, with occasional green poking out. Shikamaru however, seemed triumphant enough.
“At least I figured out you were supposed to put water in when making soup.” Unlike you and Neji last time. Though it was unspoken, the two knew exactly of which humiliating moment the Nara was referring to. That day had indeed not been a very good one.
“So, since you’re so professional at this,” Neji continued, smirking slightly. “You won’t mind cooking dinner for us, would you?” Sakura, having guessed what he would say, had already begun playing her part. Whining, it seemed, worked wonders on the Nara.
“Oh, yes, Shika-kun.” She gushed out, smiling innocently. “You must. Since you are so good, we shouldn’t waste talent like yours.” Shikamaru backed away slowly, eyeing his lovers sceptically. It didn’t take a genius to figure out he’d landed himself in a very troublesome spot indeed.
“I-”
“-will gladly cook something delicious for us, right?” Shikamaru held up his hands in front of him defensively, protesting against their wishes. Neji and Sakura, however, seemed determined to win this. He backed up until his back hit the wall, cursing Naruto inwardly. This was all his fault. Him and his stupid questions.
“Okay, okay!” Shikamaru threw his hands up in defeat. “I’ll cook. Don’t blame me when you die of poisoning. Sakura, turn the stove on please.”
Sakura, being quite pleased with herself, walked over to the stove, reached her hand out to turn a knob when she stopped short and stared. And stared. And stared some more. She let out a nervous giggle. There were so many buttons and knobs! Which one was to turn it on...?
Pink brows knitted together in concentration as she studied each intently. It was useless. Every damn button looked the same. She straightened out again. She wasn’t a genius for nothing. Maybe, there was another way. A delighted smile spread across her face when an idea hit her. Yes! The stove was just fire. So, maybe if she Katon’d it...
Satisfied with her solution, she set out to make the seals for a small, small Katon jutsu...
-
Two hours later, the three, after a few...accidents, burns and explosions, slumped down in a pile, covered in unidentified substances- the manifest of their cooking. Sakura’s face held a sheepish expression, while Neji’s clearly said I-told-you-so. Shikamaru, on the other hand, had already started to make his way to the top drawer, where all their precious take out flyers were located.
“Sushi tonight, anyone?”