Stickler and Daryan in "A Special Announcement"
Stickler: Announcer: *Early in the morning, just after first bell, a voice crackles over the intercom. At first, it's the usual school announcer, a perky-sounding Junior girl.* Good morning, Cromartie students! Today we're continuing our speeches by outstanding students. Today's speech is by sophomore valedictorian Wesley Stickler!
Stickler: *There's a shuffling noise, and Stickler's nasal, droning monotone comes wafting over the airwaves.* Hello fellow students. My name? Wesley Stickler. My overarching goal in life? The pursuit of knowledge using the scientific method. Now I know what some of you are thinking...
Daryan: *Normally, Daryan would be trying to sleep during the announcements while sitting straight up in his desk, but when Stickler takes the mic, his eyes open up and the once peaceful expression he had is replaced with one of contempt.*
Stickler: *The mike makes a sweeping noise, as if its been lifted through the air.* WHY SCIENCE? The attitude that I've seen from my fellow students is nothing short of preposterous when I attempt to explain my love for all things scientific. They maintain that science is only useful in limited situations and look down on it much like they do math or any other difficult subject.
Daryan: Oh for the love of...If he doesn't shut up in the next five seconds, I'm coming down there.
Stickler: But science can be applied to any of the other subjects as well! Not merely the hard sciences or the soft sciences but also things like Geography, History, and English. By using the scientific method *and here his voice is almost reverent* one can discover the best ways to study each of these subjects and attain the rank of valedictorian, just as I have.
Daryan: *Daryan looks at his watch and counts down* Three...two...one..That's it. *Daryan gets up from his desk and tells the teacher that he's going to the bathroom. The look on the teacher shows that he doesn't believe Daryan or he doesn't care. Once out of his classroom, Daryan goes to his locker and pulls out a record before closing the door.*
Stickler: Let me tell you a story, fellow students. The story of how I managed to pull up my English grade from a B+ to an A- using the scientific method as well as my own ingenuity. Through keen observation I managed to ascertain the best way to attempt extra credit, the same way Galileo Galilei discovered the moons of Jupiter.
Daryan: *Daryan has now pratically tuned out whatever rants that Stickler has as he heads down to the administration area in the center of the high school. The students that have are cutting class or running late get out of his way, not wanting to be a part of what might happen.*
Stickler: I observed that the mistakes I had previously made in my English paper - all due to my distraction with the larger motions of science in this world, the observations of which sometimes make it difficult to concentrate on something as mundane as fiction - were all due to a particular writing style that the professor wished to see me follow.
Daryan: *Daryan goes down the stairs to the central offices and turns right to where the PA system is held and opens the door. The junior girl sees him and opens her mouth to say something, but Daryan puts his index finger to his lips and then jerks his thumb indicating "Shut up and get out".*
Stickler: So I came to the professor and asked her whether I could revise and turn in another version and she agreed. Using an example I found on the internet I arranged the paper in the same way, and turned it in to the teacher and sh-
Daryan: Rousing speech, Fish. Really inspired the troops. *Daryan reaches out to grab Stickler by his clothes.*
Stickler: D-D-Daryan!! *He gapes* G-Go AWAY!
Daryan: Sorry, Fish. I need to use this. *Daryan tosses Stickler out of the PA room, the junior following behind him. He then shuts the door and puts a chair under the doorknob so no one can get back in.*
Stickler: *Stickler stumbles backward out of the room, his mouth falling open.* Hey! I practiced that speech in front of the mirror for an hour! There's five minutes left on it!!
Daryan: That's nice. Don't care. *Daryan turns to the old record player that is still used and puts the record he carried with him on it. The sticker on it reads "T-Rex" and under it "20th Century Boy". He puts the needle on the record and a single guitar starts playing followed by a man going "Owww-ha".*
Daryan: *Daryan then grabs the microphone while the song plays* All right, people! Time for something more interesting than that boring fish we all know and hate, man! This saturday, The Gavinners, those saviors of rock, are going to be performing at the Stick Drum in the annual Battle of the Bands Concert! Yours truly will be there along with the rest of the band so come on down and watch us kill the competition, man! Tickets are 20 bucks at the door and there's going to be an after-show party!
Daryan: Everyone's invited, except for those losers Stickler and that one poser with the cat ears! Be there or you are going to make me mad. And you guys wouldn't like me when I'm mad. *And with that, Daryan switches off the microphone and lets "20th Century Boy" play for it's length.*
Stickler: *Stickler pouts as he's told he's not invited.* JUST FOR THAT I'M GOING ANYWAY! *he shouts through the door*
Daryan: *Daryan shouts back* That's what bouncers are for, Fish!
Stickler: It's a public event!! *He runs up to the door and flings himself against it like a ragdoll, but he makes no progress whatsoever getting it open.*
Daryan: My concert and party, my rules! Don't like it, go back to the ocean, Sticker!
Daryan: *After Stickler's failed attempt to get the door open, the school's security team arrives at the door and ram the door with more success than Stickler's attempt as the chair falls down and the door swings open, revealing Daryan sitting in another chair as he puts the record back in it's jacket.* Hey, guys. What's new? *The two men were not amused as they restrain Daryan.*
Daryan: *They also take the T-Rex album from him as they drag him off into the detention room for his antics. Daryan takes all of this with a grin, he needed the sleep anyway.*
Stickler: *Stickler, as well, is shuffled off to his first period class. Enough time has been wasted that he's not permitted to continue his speech, and he spends the rest of the day in a funk, arms crossed, lips pouting.*