Rescue Me - Chapter 2 of ?
Title: Rescue Me
Author: Annie
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Jared/Sandy - eventual Jared/Jensen/others
Rating: NC17 for sexual situations, character death & angst
Summary: Jared and Sandy are married and expecting their first child. Tragedy strikes and Jared is left alone with a child to raise. Can Jensen help him?
Disclaimer: I don’t own Jared, Jensen or Sandy - they all own themselves. I am also very jealous of Sandy but do not wish her any will!!
Sorry for killing you sweetheart!!
A/N: This is for zomzoms, who gave me the prompt of Jared with a child and also gave me the basic plot!! Hope this does it for you Debz!! I can but try!
Previous chapter
January 2011 - San Antonio
The baby was crying; loud angry cries that were on the verge of turning frantic. Jared rolled over in his bed and pushed his head further into the pillow. His mom or Megan would get up and see to him, they always did. He reached out a hand and picked up the bottle of pills the doctor had given him. Two swallowed dry always did the trick and he fell back into a drug aided sleep.
His mom had insisted that he come back to the family home. She worried about him, she explained, he shouldn’t be left alone over Christmas, someone needed to be there to make sure he ate enough, slept and took his meds.
Jared hadn’t really cared. He had left the hospital almost spaced out on the drugs they had given him and he had slept most of the holidays away.
When his son came home from the hospital only days after Jared, it was his mom and Megan and even his dad who cared for him. Jared didn’t even acknowledge his existence, finding it hard to reconcile the screaming, red-faced creature with the bump that had rested and kicked within Sandy’s stomach for those last nine months.
He didn’t even have a name yet.
January 2011
Sandy’s funeral was only days away and Jared could barely face the world. He wanted to drown himself in whiskey and fall into oblivion but his mom was watching him closely and he had noticed that there was no alcohol in the house.
His mom had been over to his place to fetch some stuff for the baby. She had brought over a stack of cards; Christmas cards and In Sympathy cards, all lumped together in one big heap. Jared had stared at them and then dumped them into the trash. He didn’t want anyone’s sympathy, anyone’s concern. He hated the words ‘I know how you feel’ because they just weren’t true. No one knew how he felt, how could they? They hadn’t lost the love of their life, they hadn’t watched her being wheeled away screaming, they weren’t numb and empty and alone.
Jared was broken.
It was Saturday and Jared was half asleep, lying on his bed watching the fading winter sunlight make patterns on the ceiling. He heard the car pull up in the drive and heard the slamming of doors. He could hear his mom’s voice and then the deep rumble of another tone in return. He sat up as he heard footsteps coming up the stairs and he tensed as he heard the knock on his bedroom door.
“Jared?” It was his mom’s voice. “Please open the door, someone is here to see you.”
“I told you...” He was aware of his voice sounding cracked, broken. “I don’t want to see anyone!”
“Come on Jared.” A softer, more familiar voice, “I’ve come a long way man - let me see you.”
He found himself moving from the bed and throwing open the door, his heart in his mouth. He swayed for a moment as he stared out into the hall and he could feel his throat close and his eyes fill up with something warm and unforgiving.
He looked tired and shabby, several days of stubble almost a red-gold beard. There was a battered baseball cap on his head and his green eyes were dull behind the gold rimmed glasses that he wore.
“Jensen!” He leant forward and let the older man catch him, strong arms wrapping around his waist, pulling him closer. Jared gripped hard on shaking shoulders and buried his head in Jensen’s neck, tears streaming down his cheeks.
He didn’t really understand; couldn’t work out why, after all this time, he was finally crying. His body shook and his heart pounded and his grief poured out of him like a tide.
All Jensen did was hold him close and murmur words of comfort and tenderness and suddenly he did not feel quite so empty anymore.
Jensen
The first thing that Jensen noticed about his friend was how still he had become.
He had spent four good years with Jared on the set of Supernatural and the one thing he remembered clearly was how lively the younger man always was. Jared bounced about the set like Tigger, limbs twitching, hands full of candy. Jared laughed constantly and could talk for Texas. Life had never been dull but it had always been fun.
Jared sat on the sofa in his mom’s sitting room, his hands resting on his knees. There were huge dark shadows under his eyes and his face was pale but the most disturbing thing was his inactivity. Jared did not move, didn’t twitch, didn’t bounce, did not even blink. Jensen bit his lip and moved a little closer to the younger man, his hand resting gently on his knee. “Ok dude?”
Jared jumped, head whirling round at the sudden contact. Jensen withdrew his hand, his heart breaking.
Another thing about his friend was his total disregard for personal space. Jared had always been a hugger, a grabber, hell even a kisser when he was being particularly stupid. Many times Jensen had found himself with a lap full of Padalecki, a leg round his waist, a hand slung across his shoulders. Jared liked to hold, to be near to you and yet, now, it seemed that even the lightest of touches made him uneasy.
“Yeah.” Jensen watched as his friend swallowed. “Yeah - thanks.”
“I - I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner Jay.” Jensen slumped back on the sofa, watching Jared closely. “I came as soon as they would let me - you know - I - I wanted to be here - for - well - tomorrow.”
“Thanks.” Jared’s voice was flat and Jensen understood; he could feel the pain radiating off Jared in waves and he didn’t quite know what to do. “I appreciate it.”
“I haven’t met the baby yet.” Jensen forced a smile and reached into his back pack, “I bought him a little something.” He pulled out the furry yellow duck, which at the time had seemed a good idea but now seemed awfully shallow and lame. “It - er - it squeaks.”
Jared took the toy in his large hand and let it balance on his palm. He glanced across at Jensen, his throat working. “It looks - it looks kinda like a dog toy man,” he said, his mouth turning into a slight smile. “Are you sure you didn’t bring it for Harley?”
“Came from Hamleys.” Jensen felt a sudden surge of relief. “Big ass toy store in London - even the Royal family shop there!”
“He won’t play with it yet,” Jared was talking almost to himself. “He just puts everything in his mouth at the moment - or so my mom says.”
“What did you call him dude?” Jensen stares at the duck as Jared turns it over and over in his hand. “Something manly and suitably Texan?”
“He doesn’t have a name yet.” Jared looks down at the carpet as if it fascinates him. “I - we - we had a list and - well - I haven’t looked at it.”
“I see.” Jensen does see and it hurts. He takes the duck from Jared and shakes his head. “Shall we go and see him anyway - give him this? - It’s totally child friendly dude - so it can go into his mouth if it wants.”
“Nah - he - he’s sleeping.” Jared flushes. “He’s loud when he gets woken up.”
“Ok.” Jensen wants to say something but he can’t think of anything to say. He can’t put himself in Jared’s place; he can’t even begin to understand what his friend is going through. All he can do is be here for him and he hopes that that will be enough.
Jensen could never tell Jared how he really felt about him. He couldn’t, wouldn’t do that to the guy. He knew that Jared would be ok with it, that Jared would be understanding, would let him down gently, would never hold it against him but he still couldn’t do it. Jared had Sandy and had no idea that, not only was his best friend gay, he was also totally in love with him.
So Jensen had supported Jared through his engagement nerves; organised a mammoth bachelor party with strippers and everything, agreed to be best man at Jared’s wedding and had been waiting to be asked to be Godfather to Jared’s first born.
Now, here he was, confronted with a broken man, a man he barely recognised and he was resigned to one thing.
Despite everything he was still in love with Jared.
Next chapter
Author: Annie
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Jared/Sandy - eventual Jared/Jensen/others
Rating: NC17 for sexual situations, character death & angst
Summary: Jared and Sandy are married and expecting their first child. Tragedy strikes and Jared is left alone with a child to raise. Can Jensen help him?
Disclaimer: I don’t own Jared, Jensen or Sandy - they all own themselves. I am also very jealous of Sandy but do not wish her any will!!
Sorry for killing you sweetheart!!
A/N: This is for zomzoms, who gave me the prompt of Jared with a child and also gave me the basic plot!! Hope this does it for you Debz!! I can but try!
Previous chapter
January 2011 - San Antonio
The baby was crying; loud angry cries that were on the verge of turning frantic. Jared rolled over in his bed and pushed his head further into the pillow. His mom or Megan would get up and see to him, they always did. He reached out a hand and picked up the bottle of pills the doctor had given him. Two swallowed dry always did the trick and he fell back into a drug aided sleep.
His mom had insisted that he come back to the family home. She worried about him, she explained, he shouldn’t be left alone over Christmas, someone needed to be there to make sure he ate enough, slept and took his meds.
Jared hadn’t really cared. He had left the hospital almost spaced out on the drugs they had given him and he had slept most of the holidays away.
When his son came home from the hospital only days after Jared, it was his mom and Megan and even his dad who cared for him. Jared didn’t even acknowledge his existence, finding it hard to reconcile the screaming, red-faced creature with the bump that had rested and kicked within Sandy’s stomach for those last nine months.
He didn’t even have a name yet.
January 2011
Sandy’s funeral was only days away and Jared could barely face the world. He wanted to drown himself in whiskey and fall into oblivion but his mom was watching him closely and he had noticed that there was no alcohol in the house.
His mom had been over to his place to fetch some stuff for the baby. She had brought over a stack of cards; Christmas cards and In Sympathy cards, all lumped together in one big heap. Jared had stared at them and then dumped them into the trash. He didn’t want anyone’s sympathy, anyone’s concern. He hated the words ‘I know how you feel’ because they just weren’t true. No one knew how he felt, how could they? They hadn’t lost the love of their life, they hadn’t watched her being wheeled away screaming, they weren’t numb and empty and alone.
Jared was broken.
It was Saturday and Jared was half asleep, lying on his bed watching the fading winter sunlight make patterns on the ceiling. He heard the car pull up in the drive and heard the slamming of doors. He could hear his mom’s voice and then the deep rumble of another tone in return. He sat up as he heard footsteps coming up the stairs and he tensed as he heard the knock on his bedroom door.
“Jared?” It was his mom’s voice. “Please open the door, someone is here to see you.”
“I told you...” He was aware of his voice sounding cracked, broken. “I don’t want to see anyone!”
“Come on Jared.” A softer, more familiar voice, “I’ve come a long way man - let me see you.”
He found himself moving from the bed and throwing open the door, his heart in his mouth. He swayed for a moment as he stared out into the hall and he could feel his throat close and his eyes fill up with something warm and unforgiving.
He looked tired and shabby, several days of stubble almost a red-gold beard. There was a battered baseball cap on his head and his green eyes were dull behind the gold rimmed glasses that he wore.
“Jensen!” He leant forward and let the older man catch him, strong arms wrapping around his waist, pulling him closer. Jared gripped hard on shaking shoulders and buried his head in Jensen’s neck, tears streaming down his cheeks.
He didn’t really understand; couldn’t work out why, after all this time, he was finally crying. His body shook and his heart pounded and his grief poured out of him like a tide.
All Jensen did was hold him close and murmur words of comfort and tenderness and suddenly he did not feel quite so empty anymore.
Jensen
The first thing that Jensen noticed about his friend was how still he had become.
He had spent four good years with Jared on the set of Supernatural and the one thing he remembered clearly was how lively the younger man always was. Jared bounced about the set like Tigger, limbs twitching, hands full of candy. Jared laughed constantly and could talk for Texas. Life had never been dull but it had always been fun.
Jared sat on the sofa in his mom’s sitting room, his hands resting on his knees. There were huge dark shadows under his eyes and his face was pale but the most disturbing thing was his inactivity. Jared did not move, didn’t twitch, didn’t bounce, did not even blink. Jensen bit his lip and moved a little closer to the younger man, his hand resting gently on his knee. “Ok dude?”
Jared jumped, head whirling round at the sudden contact. Jensen withdrew his hand, his heart breaking.
Another thing about his friend was his total disregard for personal space. Jared had always been a hugger, a grabber, hell even a kisser when he was being particularly stupid. Many times Jensen had found himself with a lap full of Padalecki, a leg round his waist, a hand slung across his shoulders. Jared liked to hold, to be near to you and yet, now, it seemed that even the lightest of touches made him uneasy.
“Yeah.” Jensen watched as his friend swallowed. “Yeah - thanks.”
“I - I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner Jay.” Jensen slumped back on the sofa, watching Jared closely. “I came as soon as they would let me - you know - I - I wanted to be here - for - well - tomorrow.”
“Thanks.” Jared’s voice was flat and Jensen understood; he could feel the pain radiating off Jared in waves and he didn’t quite know what to do. “I appreciate it.”
“I haven’t met the baby yet.” Jensen forced a smile and reached into his back pack, “I bought him a little something.” He pulled out the furry yellow duck, which at the time had seemed a good idea but now seemed awfully shallow and lame. “It - er - it squeaks.”
Jared took the toy in his large hand and let it balance on his palm. He glanced across at Jensen, his throat working. “It looks - it looks kinda like a dog toy man,” he said, his mouth turning into a slight smile. “Are you sure you didn’t bring it for Harley?”
“Came from Hamleys.” Jensen felt a sudden surge of relief. “Big ass toy store in London - even the Royal family shop there!”
“He won’t play with it yet,” Jared was talking almost to himself. “He just puts everything in his mouth at the moment - or so my mom says.”
“What did you call him dude?” Jensen stares at the duck as Jared turns it over and over in his hand. “Something manly and suitably Texan?”
“He doesn’t have a name yet.” Jared looks down at the carpet as if it fascinates him. “I - we - we had a list and - well - I haven’t looked at it.”
“I see.” Jensen does see and it hurts. He takes the duck from Jared and shakes his head. “Shall we go and see him anyway - give him this? - It’s totally child friendly dude - so it can go into his mouth if it wants.”
“Nah - he - he’s sleeping.” Jared flushes. “He’s loud when he gets woken up.”
“Ok.” Jensen wants to say something but he can’t think of anything to say. He can’t put himself in Jared’s place; he can’t even begin to understand what his friend is going through. All he can do is be here for him and he hopes that that will be enough.
Jensen could never tell Jared how he really felt about him. He couldn’t, wouldn’t do that to the guy. He knew that Jared would be ok with it, that Jared would be understanding, would let him down gently, would never hold it against him but he still couldn’t do it. Jared had Sandy and had no idea that, not only was his best friend gay, he was also totally in love with him.
So Jensen had supported Jared through his engagement nerves; organised a mammoth bachelor party with strippers and everything, agreed to be best man at Jared’s wedding and had been waiting to be asked to be Godfather to Jared’s first born.
Now, here he was, confronted with a broken man, a man he barely recognised and he was resigned to one thing.
Despite everything he was still in love with Jared.
Next chapter