Peaks and valleys
Am back. What a trip. I am plain exhausted, having had a delay at the airport for departure in Minneapolis. I think it had to do with cleaning the plane after international arrival to gate - but the thing is, the plane was already there when I arrived a solid hour and a half before the flight. Anyway, whatever. It wasn't a canceled flight and a delay is a fleeting annoyance. It was more about the two hour drive AFTER that I was concerned with, and rightly. I started getting very punchy by the end of my journey, and at the end of the journey on the edges of town are lots of quite dramatic curves in the road... But all was fine.
Let me back up. I landed no problem, my sister B picked me up. She was visibly upset about something - her son texted her a video of his car, which he found completely smashed when he went out to go to work on Christmas Eve. He works in a hospital, does night shift. It was a mess, his car, which he had only just purchased in October. Near as anyone can tell, at some point during the day/evening, someone came along this side street and smashed into multiple parked vehicles. My nephew's car bore the brunt of the damage. :*(
So, that's how the trip started. Then, Christmas Day, my niece, in town from Colorado, texted my sister and said, "I have a sore throat, should I skip Christmas at your place?" My sister, who has a very difficult time with her ex - her kids all tend to hang out with him and she feels like they don't give a poop about her - told her to come on over anyway. So she did, but did wear a mask. My other niece walked in the door and announced, "I feel terrible!" Both stayed all day, both went to church, both wore masks. I wore a mask. Sister did not. Naive me - I didn't realize all states aren't as proactive about the masks in public or basically anywhere! It was a culture shock for sure. Anyway, both girls took at home test. Both were positive for COVID.
So the plans for me had to shift. I had to quarantine with my sister. My nieces went ... to their dad's, because, and this is where it gets really frustrating, he had been sick on Wednesday when they were both there, and then they both went back on Christmas Eve and HE was already confirmed positive for COVID. How did that happen? Oh, he went pub hopping a while back. All of this was known to him, and both my nieces. NONE of it was shared with my sister. I sincerely doubt she would have had either niece over until I could be gone from her house had she known that detail.
Yeah. To say I was angry is an understatement. I had to wait four days to be tested, so couldn't go anywhere, and I know my sister did not anticipate being basically shut in with me. Thank goodness the guidelines have shifted somewhat, or I may have had to spend the whole time with her and not do what the trip was intended for - a visit with my parents!
When I got tested on Tuesday, though, all was okay - I did not catch it. So, to the hometown I went. I continued to mask with my parents until I had been five full days with no symptoms.
My parents are good. I had been forewarned about how "bad" Mom's dementia is. While I can see she struggles, it wasn't nearly as heartrending as I was led to believe. It's not easy, mind you, but there is still my sassy mama in there, she just comes out less frequently. My sister L also said my mom puts on a bit of a show with company so as not to seem so frail. I wish I could tell her that is unnecessary. I don't need to be bolstered. I have a fair deal of experience with folks dealing with dementia due to the nature of my work, so nothing I saw or experienced with my mother was too terribly upsetting.
An example or two: when I first got there and hauled my suitcase up to the guest room, as I came back down I heard my mother and father chatting. My name was mentioned and my mom said, and this is exact, "I had a daughter named SBG. She moved to Oregon years ago and I haven't heard from her since!"
I laughed at that one. I have no doubt that is exactly how my mother has felt since I left the midwest, despite the fact that other than my sister L who lives with them I am the one they most frequently speak with. The rest of my family can't be bothered to call for check ins, it's confounding. The second was yesterday as we were all saying goodbyes. My sister B told my mom, "We'll be back out soon to see you." meaning her and her BF. My mom turned immediately to me and said, "Will you come with her to visit, too?" with such an earnest, hopeful look upon her sweet face.
Jam that dagger in my heart. That one got me. It's still getting me a bit, tears spring into my eyes thinking about that, and about how she was confused when I told her that I live a bit further away than B and can't easily visit.
Minnesota, y'all. No masks anywhere. Honestly disturbed me to see a church full of geriatric, frail looking folks yesterday and I could count the number of people wearing masks. In my own family, only my sister L and I had them on. WHAT. A sign in front of a vacant business read, "We believe in medical freedom!!"
Sigh. I know it's never going to happen when people stop thinking only of their own selves with this thing. Hell, the fiasco of the start of my trip sums up why this is still a big deal - it wasn't just my former brother in law who got sick, but he infected three of his kids - two of whom work in healthcare - so, they missed work. My other niece's plans got hijacked, mine got hijacked... the ripple effect goes beyond who gets it and who doesn't. People in close contact have a responsibility to not just create another ripple because "medical freedom" means they don't have to follow rules that keep others safe and daily life running.
Anyway. I actually did have a very nice visit with my mom and dad. My dad is really ... I really hope enough of him was deposited in me, because he is stalwart and steadfast and such a devoted angel to my mother. And he, thankfully, remains sharp as a tack.
Walter did well at the boarding section of vet, though I immediately noticed he's got a bare spot on his tushie from chewing on it. He was a good boy, but not unstressed. The cats did okay with stranger coming in, except Pickle who melted down. When I came home she was huddled at the back of a closet and in the spare room - as Roy was eating her food, I advised the sitter to keep Pickle in that room with food, water and box. Not ideal, but that was the only way to guarantee she would get her food and not Piggy McPiggerson.
We are all back to usual, snuggling on sofa. I need to clean house and get laundry done, but due to the delays in travel I didn't get home till 3 AM and somehow awakened at 7:15. I am punchdrunk and not super inclined to move. Still, better have done with it.
December photos to come. This was all too much to dump in that post.
Let me back up. I landed no problem, my sister B picked me up. She was visibly upset about something - her son texted her a video of his car, which he found completely smashed when he went out to go to work on Christmas Eve. He works in a hospital, does night shift. It was a mess, his car, which he had only just purchased in October. Near as anyone can tell, at some point during the day/evening, someone came along this side street and smashed into multiple parked vehicles. My nephew's car bore the brunt of the damage. :*(
So, that's how the trip started. Then, Christmas Day, my niece, in town from Colorado, texted my sister and said, "I have a sore throat, should I skip Christmas at your place?" My sister, who has a very difficult time with her ex - her kids all tend to hang out with him and she feels like they don't give a poop about her - told her to come on over anyway. So she did, but did wear a mask. My other niece walked in the door and announced, "I feel terrible!" Both stayed all day, both went to church, both wore masks. I wore a mask. Sister did not. Naive me - I didn't realize all states aren't as proactive about the masks in public or basically anywhere! It was a culture shock for sure. Anyway, both girls took at home test. Both were positive for COVID.
So the plans for me had to shift. I had to quarantine with my sister. My nieces went ... to their dad's, because, and this is where it gets really frustrating, he had been sick on Wednesday when they were both there, and then they both went back on Christmas Eve and HE was already confirmed positive for COVID. How did that happen? Oh, he went pub hopping a while back. All of this was known to him, and both my nieces. NONE of it was shared with my sister. I sincerely doubt she would have had either niece over until I could be gone from her house had she known that detail.
Yeah. To say I was angry is an understatement. I had to wait four days to be tested, so couldn't go anywhere, and I know my sister did not anticipate being basically shut in with me. Thank goodness the guidelines have shifted somewhat, or I may have had to spend the whole time with her and not do what the trip was intended for - a visit with my parents!
When I got tested on Tuesday, though, all was okay - I did not catch it. So, to the hometown I went. I continued to mask with my parents until I had been five full days with no symptoms.
My parents are good. I had been forewarned about how "bad" Mom's dementia is. While I can see she struggles, it wasn't nearly as heartrending as I was led to believe. It's not easy, mind you, but there is still my sassy mama in there, she just comes out less frequently. My sister L also said my mom puts on a bit of a show with company so as not to seem so frail. I wish I could tell her that is unnecessary. I don't need to be bolstered. I have a fair deal of experience with folks dealing with dementia due to the nature of my work, so nothing I saw or experienced with my mother was too terribly upsetting.
An example or two: when I first got there and hauled my suitcase up to the guest room, as I came back down I heard my mother and father chatting. My name was mentioned and my mom said, and this is exact, "I had a daughter named SBG. She moved to Oregon years ago and I haven't heard from her since!"
I laughed at that one. I have no doubt that is exactly how my mother has felt since I left the midwest, despite the fact that other than my sister L who lives with them I am the one they most frequently speak with. The rest of my family can't be bothered to call for check ins, it's confounding. The second was yesterday as we were all saying goodbyes. My sister B told my mom, "We'll be back out soon to see you." meaning her and her BF. My mom turned immediately to me and said, "Will you come with her to visit, too?" with such an earnest, hopeful look upon her sweet face.
Jam that dagger in my heart. That one got me. It's still getting me a bit, tears spring into my eyes thinking about that, and about how she was confused when I told her that I live a bit further away than B and can't easily visit.
Minnesota, y'all. No masks anywhere. Honestly disturbed me to see a church full of geriatric, frail looking folks yesterday and I could count the number of people wearing masks. In my own family, only my sister L and I had them on. WHAT. A sign in front of a vacant business read, "We believe in medical freedom!!"
Sigh. I know it's never going to happen when people stop thinking only of their own selves with this thing. Hell, the fiasco of the start of my trip sums up why this is still a big deal - it wasn't just my former brother in law who got sick, but he infected three of his kids - two of whom work in healthcare - so, they missed work. My other niece's plans got hijacked, mine got hijacked... the ripple effect goes beyond who gets it and who doesn't. People in close contact have a responsibility to not just create another ripple because "medical freedom" means they don't have to follow rules that keep others safe and daily life running.
Anyway. I actually did have a very nice visit with my mom and dad. My dad is really ... I really hope enough of him was deposited in me, because he is stalwart and steadfast and such a devoted angel to my mother. And he, thankfully, remains sharp as a tack.
Walter did well at the boarding section of vet, though I immediately noticed he's got a bare spot on his tushie from chewing on it. He was a good boy, but not unstressed. The cats did okay with stranger coming in, except Pickle who melted down. When I came home she was huddled at the back of a closet and in the spare room - as Roy was eating her food, I advised the sitter to keep Pickle in that room with food, water and box. Not ideal, but that was the only way to guarantee she would get her food and not Piggy McPiggerson.
We are all back to usual, snuggling on sofa. I need to clean house and get laundry done, but due to the delays in travel I didn't get home till 3 AM and somehow awakened at 7:15. I am punchdrunk and not super inclined to move. Still, better have done with it.
December photos to come. This was all too much to dump in that post.