So, I'm not exactly sure when my last post was...but I know my life has completely changed since that time ( Read more... )

Sometimes I just don't know what to say, but I know I want to say something.  Today is one of those days.  I'm so perplexed by life, and what it throws at me sometimes.  I know I don't want to be alone anymore, but I know I don't want the problems I had in my last relationship again.  My ex (also my roomate)  broke up with her girlfriend, or rather ( Read more... )

Well, It's been a long time since I was on here!!!!  22 weeks to be exact...according to LJ.    So much has changed, and so much hasn't.  I don't think Im broken hearted anymore, so thats good.  Ive kind of made ammends with my ex, whom also happens to be my roomate!  But I guess I kind of see her as one of my closest and dearest friends...just a ( Read more... )

That is the first time I have been able to say that in a long time.  I spoke with my mom earlier this evening to see how she was doing, and it didn't go well.  She asked when I would be back in town and I said Wed or Thurs because I wanted to check out a few hospitals and schools in this area Mon and Tues.  I told her I am looking, not buying.  ( Read more... )

Well, I wrote a really long entry and somehow it got deleted.  Summary:  still nervous about dealing with S and going home.  Spoke with her briefly today, it was strained.  Spoke to a friend, S has been lying to me again and using chemo as the excuse.  Feel betrayed and lost.  Time will tell.

Today was a productive day!  I got my dad's bathroom painted and decorated just a tiny little bit.  Its a little more homey now.  S has called me a couple of times today, "I miss you so much, I love you soo much, why arent you calling me?".  The strange thing is, I dont really care.  I called her briefly, but was more interested in talking to the ( Read more... )

We just got back from Lexington/ Frankfort/Rising Sun and a few other places.  I went gambling with my middle aged dad and his "unique" middle aged guy friend.  We hung out on the boats, then had dinner, went swimming, watched OBAMA win (yeah!!!!  my faith in democracy has been restored), went to more boats, then a vineyard./winery, then to see my ( Read more... )

So Im watching All My Children, not on purpose, and the opening scene is one girl proposing to another!  What?  Is that progress?  Is gay life becoming mainstream?  The rest of it seems about the same as when I last watched it 14 years ago.  Everybody is just older.  So am I!  So far my vacation is going alright.  It is really hard to be away from ( Read more... )

Sometimes when Im feeling sad or lonely its nice to do something I did at a time in my life that wasn't so complicated.  Tonight I've been watching pieces of an 8-'s movie I used to love, "legal eagles".  I was a strange kid, I liked alot of older more adult movies like that.  Its almost  reminiscent of a much easier, calmer time in my life.  I ( Read more... )

Im really excited by some journal entries Ive read on here.  Its amazing to see there are people out there going through many of the same feelings and experiences I am.  The worst part of everything that has happened in my life is feeling so alone.  I feel like most people can't relate to what Im going through, when they hear the whole story they ( Read more... )