Will You Please Forgive Me, Please.
1. How tall are you?
6'4"
2. Do you own a gun?
Lordy no. National Republican Army, I say!
3. Rehab? Counseling?
Nop'em. I've discovered you can talk to a wall for an hour as well and they don't charge nearly as much.
4. Have you ever killed an animal?
I've run over two....somethings, on the same road in my 14,000 lbs trucks. I'm sure it made a mess both times, but there nothing you can do but put the animal between the front two tires, and hope they get missed by the four in the back.
5. Are you Irish?
Yes, though the verdict is still out on how much so. 25-50%?
6. What do you think of hot dogs?
Alright if they're turkey, otherwise, cook me a brat please.
7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
The entire Roger Whittaker xmas album. Hey, it's not my fault what my household played during christmas in my youth!
8. What is your favorite smell?
I...don't...know. A girl who recently finished working out? Pizza? A coffee shop? Je ne sais pas.
9. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Coffee. Preferably until I feel dehydrated, but I usually run out after 16 ounces.
10. Do you do pushups?
No. I prefer a "skyview" of the ground.
11. Have you ever done ecstasy?
Yes. *dun dun dun* Boo, me!
12. Have you been shot?
Pictures and medically, absolutely. With a gun, well, I'm not so certain that was a pertinent question to which many people might give a confirming response, therefore justifying the original proposal of said question.
13. Have you ever been hospitalized?
No. But I do hope in the case of anybody who answered yes to the previous question as to its original intent, they would also answer yes here.
14. Do you like painkillers?
More like, am not familiar with....
15. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Don't have one. Hence the "Scott, you're the best friend a girl could ever have!" snydrome.
16. Do you own a knife?
Yes! Two kinds. Butter and Steak!
17. Do you have A.D.D?
ADD is lie, or rather an excuse. And an easy one at that.
18. Do you?
I have actually deleted above question for the sake of the reader, so as to not force them to shake their head with too much disappointment that I even bothered to fill out this survey.
19.Name Five Drinks You Regularly Drink:
Coffee. Propel. Gatorade. Sprite. Beer.
20. What's In Your CD Player?
Ha. Perry Cuomo.
21. What's Under Your Bed?
The floor. And no, I am not being a smart-ass. Our mattress is on the floor.
22. Current Hair?
Needing cut.
23. What are you wearing?
Shorts and a T-shirt.
24. Current Worry?
Having wasted my life with my no-college-degree-stuck-in-a-rut-and-exhausted-with-bills-to-pay-and-whatever-other-excuse-i-have. I just want the energy when I'm home TO write! That's it! Fuck.
25. Current Love?
Wife. Writing. The Tribe.
26. Current Hate?
Job/Lack of Safety of my job/Horrible drivers while doing job/Exhaustion from job/Afraid I can't get a better ___(can you guess what goes in the blank?).
27. Favorite Place To Be?
Is it possible this question made me horribly sad? I don't have one. Not right now anyhow.
28. Least Favorite Place To Be?
Richmond Road on the border of Solon and Bedford Heights, Ohio. It's the end of my work day meaning I've been working too long, I'm filthy, I'm cranky, and it has the aesthetic pleasure of disgustingly dirty kitchen to boot.
29. if You Could Play an Instrument?
Guitar.
30. Favorite Colors?
Blue. I don't discriminate due to shade.
31. Person(s) From Your Past You Wish You Could be with Right Now?
Mom. Mom. Mom.
32. Where Would You Like To Go?
You know, I've almost always felt too trapped to consider traveling.
33. Where Do you want to live?
In a house I'm happy with.
34. Favorite food?
Pasta. Only white sauces need apply.
35. Color of most clothes you own?
Dark Blue.
36. Number of pillows you sleep with?
Two. Can I answer with a word like that?
37. What do you wear when you go to sleep?
Boxers.
38. what were you doing 12AM last night?
Sleeping.
39. What do you think you'll be doing in 10 years?
Hopefully writing. Hopefully being a father. Hopefully not working where I have for the last seven years.
40. Are you paranoid?
It probably depends on what about. I know Shirley Manson thinks she is.
41. First piercing/tattoo?
Superfixx on left bicep-18.
42. Last person you yelled at?
Amy, my boss.
43. Latest addiction?
Indians baseball.
44. Last thing you ate?
Pizza.
45. If you could be a pirate, would you?
Yargh, I don't be knowin' if I'm good enough to make the squadron down there in Ye Olde Pittsburgh. But if they offered thine contract, I would certainly accept their booty! Argh!
46. Do you have an iPod?
Yes. I have an iPod. Shouldn't there be a follow up to this question?
47. When and why did you last vomit?
July Fourth. I had too much Captain in me. Then the toilet took all of my Captain.
48. What's in your pockets right now?
Ha! They're empty! You get nothing!
49. what color are your bedroom walls
White. Ahem, ahem. Hannah. I painted the room I was responsible for. ;-)
50. last thing that made you laugh?
The Russian dudes on my route who sell sex toys and listen to NPR. I still can't figure THAT one out.
51. any pets now?
For me, no, but Hannah's fish are in sight.
52. innie or an outtie?
Innie.
53. do you have any piercings?
No. Do you have any GOOD questions coming? I'm getting bored.
54. If you were a crayon what color would you be?
White. I'm essentially unnoticeable when you use me, until you cross my path with a different color, then I mess you all up. (That was my "creative" answer. I haven't spent much time speculating life as a metaphor to crayons, so please forgive me for not having an answer.)
55. Have u ever won any awards?
Contractor of the Month. x Times. Loader of the month. x Times. Service Award. The "citizenship award" in 6th grade. Runner up in 8th grade presidential student council race by one vote. Also Runner up in "Newcomer of the Year" in Black Box Theatre Group at the University of Dayton '98-'99.
56.How many TV's do you have in your house:
2.
57. Have you ever sprained/broken/fractured a bone or gotten stitches/staples?
Broken right pinky. Three stitches in back of head in spring 2000. 42 Stitches in right forearm in shape of a U, the bottom of the U facing my elbow, June 26th, 1995.
58. Who do you tell your dreams to?
Nobody.
59. if you could pick one person to make out with who would it be?
Uh, my wife. These questions get boring and predictable for some of us once a certain day has transpired in our lives.
60. What do you think of the person who posted this before you?
i think she and I would have made an interesting pair of friends. Not that we can't via the interweb, but you get the idea. She's smart. I wish I could watch her teach for just one day to tell her how proud I am of her. Not that I can't do that now anyhow. Proud of you lady. I remember her smiling a lot when I was around her. That was reassuring. It made me smile in turn. What a great quality. I guess I think a lot of her.
AND JUST BECAUSE I CAN....
1. FIRST NAME
Scott.
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
The Bobby Goldsboro song, "Watching Scottie Grow." Blegth!
3. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
No, but I liked the moon a lot for the summer of '98.
4. WHICH FINGER IS YOUR FAVORITE?
Ring. If you focus on using them, the motion feels great.
5. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
Last night. And the night before, etc etc. Yes, work makes me so tired I routinely cry. Yikes.
6. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
L-l-l-love it!
7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Salami.
8. ANY BAD HABITS?
Of course. It feels like I was just asked if I have skin.
9. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
I should say Jordan Knight-Give it to You. But it makes me smile, so....oh! Taproot.
10. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
If I ever met myself.
11. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
No. I made it all the way though grade school and never told. Yeah right. Nowadays I am actually selective about who I tell, mainly being immediate family and maybe my boss.
12. DO LOOKS MATTER?
Yes. I don't shop in stores that look like shit. Looks draw you in, then the products and prices inside determine if there is a sale or not.
13. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
Crying. And sometimes other less-productive means I used to be better at controlling.
14. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
My FedEx truck.
15. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
Yes.
16.WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
Mr. Bear.
17. WHAT CLASS IN SCHOOL DO YOU THINK IS TOTALLY USELESS?
0
18. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL?
Only one ending in .com.
19. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Not so much as creative word-play.
20. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
Yes, and I got out as quickly as possible.
21. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
I don't think about this anymore and haven't for a few years. My wonderful wife is the reason for this tragically boring answer.
22. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
Ferg. Fergie. "scottscottscottscottscottscottscott." Honey. The FedEx Guy. Speedy. Overtime. FedEx. Scott-de-Trot. Fergilator.
23. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
If it was assured I would be dying within the week no matter what. Sure. Otherwise. No.
24. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
Not if I don't have to.
25. DO YOU THINK THAT YOU HAVE STRONG POINTS?
If I didn't I wouldn't think I've failed, instead I'd think I'm making it.
26. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
Cookies n' Creme.
27. What is your shoe size?
14-15.
28. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR?
blue.
29. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
Four.
30. WHO DO YOU MISS MOST RIGHT NOW?
A lot of people. I have a staple answer, but there are so many people who get left out when that happens.
31. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
Anyone who has more time that I guessed it would take, and won't use the time more wisely. Absolutely.
32. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Bloc Party.
33. LAST THING YOU ATE?
Pizza
34. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Guy at Jefferson-Smurfit-Stone asking me to come for a pick-up.
35. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN the preferred gender(s)?
Movement. If their standing still, how they hold themselves.
36. DO YOU LOVE THE PERSON WHO POSTED THIS?
I don't like this question. There are too many levels to the operative word. So I will say, It would be easy to, because I can see her as a person who is capable of giving me something treasurable and cherished.
37. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
Not so good.
38. FAVORITE DRINK?
Sprite or Gatorade, depending.
39. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
Great Lakes Brewing Company's Edmund Fitzgerald.
40. FAVORITE SPORT?
Basketball to play. Baseball or Football to watch. The Browns and Indians make that determination.
41. HAIR COLOR?
Brown.
42. EYE COLOr
Blue.
43. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No. Glasses.
44. SIBLINGS?
Sister, Natasha-32. Brothers in law Chris,31(2)? and Colin-15.
45. FAVORITE MONTH?
May/October. They both have exceptional qualities.
46. FAVORITE FOOD?
Probably still pasta.
47. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Hitch.
48. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Hm. April 12th.
49. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
I usually used to be. There were exceptions to that, but essentially, yes, too shy. But it wasn't so much shy, as not-so-forward because it always seemed rude to me.
50. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer.
51. HUGS OR KISSES?
A nice mixture of both. But if were talking Hershey's HUGS.
52. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
Former.
53. WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
The nice lady who I stole them from, leaving....uh.....maybe Hannah.
54. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
Most everybody.
55. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
Will You Please Be Quiet, Please-Raymond Carver.
56.What color is your mouse pad?
Black.
57. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Scattergories.
58. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
The Tribe beat the A's.
59. FAVORITE SMELLS?
i already said this.
60. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP?
I don't want to do this, but I have to.