(no subject)
Today, I finally realized how far I've really come in the past 4 years.
April 2003
May 2004
January 2006
February 2007 (my tiniest eeep!)
December 2008
April 2008 (you can tell I gained my 30lbs of boyf weight by this time)
December 2009
January 2010
April 2010
Once middle school started is when I really started to lose myself and all control. All my friends from elementary school were suddenly not my friends so I turned to food for comfort. By the time 9th grade hit I was out of control. I was wearing size 24 pants and I was extremely depressed. High school came quickly and that didn't help at all either. I had friends but at the same time I didn't. It wasn't until I dropped out in November 2005 when I decided to drop out that I finally started to get back in control of myself. 2007 came around before I knew it and I was as tiny as I've ever been, I loved my body. I was so confident in myself. I quickly got a boyfriend and that relationship had me gaining weight back. At the end of the two years I ended up 30lbs heavier. All the hard work was gone! It's been a year since I left him and over this year it's been an emotional roller coaster. I started college, moved out of my parents, made all new friends, and I am finally becoming truly happy with myself. I lost 10 of the 30lbs over this time period.
Some days I am rough on myself because I let my body go so bad. But today I put on a dress that looked awful on me this time last year and I looked awesome. I got compliments all day on how cute I looked. I stood in front the mirror and felt beautiful about myself. Sure, I may never be a size 4 and able to frolic around in a bikini but I am damn proud of where I am. Now if I could only feel this way every day of my life.
I will continue to work out and before I know it I will have my "pre-boyfriend" body back before I know it. But until then I am going to stay positive and try as hard as I possibly can I feel confident. And I am making this public after much thought and consideration. I want people to know where I am coming from and see how far I've really come.
April 2003
May 2004
January 2006
February 2007 (my tiniest eeep!)
December 2008
April 2008 (you can tell I gained my 30lbs of boyf weight by this time)
December 2009
January 2010
April 2010
Once middle school started is when I really started to lose myself and all control. All my friends from elementary school were suddenly not my friends so I turned to food for comfort. By the time 9th grade hit I was out of control. I was wearing size 24 pants and I was extremely depressed. High school came quickly and that didn't help at all either. I had friends but at the same time I didn't. It wasn't until I dropped out in November 2005 when I decided to drop out that I finally started to get back in control of myself. 2007 came around before I knew it and I was as tiny as I've ever been, I loved my body. I was so confident in myself. I quickly got a boyfriend and that relationship had me gaining weight back. At the end of the two years I ended up 30lbs heavier. All the hard work was gone! It's been a year since I left him and over this year it's been an emotional roller coaster. I started college, moved out of my parents, made all new friends, and I am finally becoming truly happy with myself. I lost 10 of the 30lbs over this time period.
Some days I am rough on myself because I let my body go so bad. But today I put on a dress that looked awful on me this time last year and I looked awesome. I got compliments all day on how cute I looked. I stood in front the mirror and felt beautiful about myself. Sure, I may never be a size 4 and able to frolic around in a bikini but I am damn proud of where I am. Now if I could only feel this way every day of my life.
I will continue to work out and before I know it I will have my "pre-boyfriend" body back before I know it. But until then I am going to stay positive and try as hard as I possibly can I feel confident. And I am making this public after much thought and consideration. I want people to know where I am coming from and see how far I've really come.