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I'm going to try to sleep so I will stop crying, I fucking hate this.

I've downloaded some songs by smashing pumpkins like today, mayonaise, quiet, 1979, and perfect a couple months ago. Today I found a website and was able to download both full albums with demos, etc. I played Siamese Dream and I totally forgot about songs like hummer, geek usa, spaceboy, and silver fuck. All these songs brought back old memories of ( Read more... )

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That look/snarl she gives at 1:53, sums up my feelings.

Everytime I learn a Hole song on guitar I cry because I think of you.....

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I've resorted back to my parents house for the night, I don't want to do anything entertaining tonight. I'm just going to learn L7 songs on guitar until my fingers bleed again. Jesus I miss you.

I've resorted to going to bed super early now. Being awake makes me think about too many things like who I love and miss so much which ends up me crying my eyes out heavily. I don't know if I want to be around anymore, nothing really to live or hold onto. I hate my current state. I need some happiness soon.

I wake up and cry because I miss my one and only girlfriend that stills makes me nervous. Baby pushpop you complete me and I wish I could see you but I won't.....

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Later on before I went to bed I got on my knees near my bed and prayed to god begging and screaming in my head how much I love Carly and miss her, I just want to see her one more time. I doubt I will instead I had her in my dreams and then once again waking up sad. I hope god will at least listen to my prayers of taking care of her dad, mom, ( Read more... )