Redredredredred. That's my room. Somehow I filled it with red things. I don't know how it happened, they just spoke to me their evil plan while I was none the wiser, and it worked. I'm positive they are responsible for all the loose vaginas that walk in downstairs. They say loose lips sink ships ( Read more... )

I just woke up from a nap to The Iliad laying next to me, only 4 pages in, and later on to some warm chicken nuggets mircrowaved by yours truly ( Read more... )

On my last night at Cumberland Farms, the floor cleaners came, like they do every Tuesday night. They get paid to do a much better job than the clerks. They move all the displays around so they can get under them, and they even buff the floor. The buffer runs on a propane tank just like one a grill might run on. Today there was only one guy, Ray, ( Read more... )

In some college students' rooms you might find empty beer cans and vodka and rum and whiskey bottles lying around. In mine you will find the empties from Arizona Iced Tea and Mountain Dew (which I often find myself consuming right before bed. Caffeine is a hoax ( Read more... )

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING PLANE!

It was everything you expected and more. Go see it now or else you hate movies.

The only timje I ate on August 8th was around 1 p.m., when I had a bowl of popcorn, a glass of Arizona iced tea, and something else I think, but I cannot rememebr for the life of me ( Read more... )

You know thos planes that fly advertisments over Hampton Beach? One of them had a midlife crisis and discovered his conscience. Thus, he got a new job.

Ummmmmmm...

Eat your mistakes. Absorb the good stuff and shit out the bad. Digestion is so symbolic, wouldn't you say? Well forget about it, because symbolism means nothing here. Just gobble them up. Bake them into little cakes. Toss whatever you want in there: chocolate, ascorbic acid, acid, arsenic and a little faded and frayed lace, maybe some cinnamon, ( Read more... )

All persons living or dead are purely coincidental, and should not be construed. No names have been changed to protect the innocent. Angels protect the innocent as a metter of heavenly routine.

I haven't spent nearly enough time reading and listening to music lately. I've only been listening to music for sleeping purposes mostly (especially since my stereo got stolen), and that has mostly been Regina Spektor, because she just happens to be the most amazing person in the world. I've only read 3 or 4 books this summer. That is lame. Mostly ( Read more... )