So I haven't written in almost a month and things as they usually do, have changed. Bobby and I are different (and he has no appendix), my Rachel is out of New Orleans, my Emilie lives in New York, I wait tables now instead of just seating them, I know what it feels like to be cheated on and I know how it feels to forgive. I know that sometimes ( Read more... )

thank god for friends. over the past few nights stevie, shelly, and now garrett have taken me in and given me a place to stay. not that i couldn't go to gadsden but it would just make things more difficult, and we've had so much fun. ugh, i'm trying not to think or do anything about the bobby situation, just give him the space he needs yadayada. ( Read more... )

so i'm packing/cleaning my crazy ass stupid dorm room. apparently i've been dumped. this is just great. i guess everybody gets sick of me eventually. i've gotta be outta here soon. my insurance is now rejecting my claims b/c i'm not in school for the fall. emilie is now on her way back to maryland to move even further away, i hope new york can ( Read more... )

gotta do gotta do! arhg. moving packing job upgrading apartment hunting phone bill paying new drivers license moving moving moving. i wouldn't be so down about it if i had somewhere to go. i want an apartment but there's no way i can afford something by myself right now, unless i started doing something like dancing and i just don't know if that's ( Read more... )

sometimes it is so hard to be mad at somebody in person and so easy from far away. things that are concrete in my mind suddenly melt and evaporate in person. i used to be so good at being angry in person. fuck i lost it. things are up and down. i got to go mattress shopping and apartment decorating shopping, such as candles and paintings and big ( Read more... )

did i mention that my purse has been stolen again!!! this is now a purse every six months. the 12th is approaching. please get divorced honey. how awful is that? i hate getting caught up on technicalities, but i can't help it if my heart hurts. i'm having to move out and i have nowhere to go but my mothers. fuck. this is gonna suck real bad till i ( Read more... )

oh the joys of being sick, and worried about my boyfriend in the hurricane. what if he gets blowed away? i wouldn't be happy. on a random tangent i'd like to mention that i think its shitty for people to refuse to speak to other people, and i can say this knowing the person i'm bitching about won't read this anyway.i'm not supposed to be playing on ( Read more... )

fuck. i don't feel so good. i think i'm tired but i don't wanna be. i can't think. where is diana's l.j.? i was not very happy to discover it missing. grumble grumble. thinking to much to write, and i hate worrying about the repercussions of what i say here. which defeats the purpose silly me. sometimes you just want to go with what you have to ( Read more... )

i got to see him! got to have him! and he brought abbie (my step-puppy)! she's never stayed at my dorm before, it was good. however he came up b/c his grandmother is dying and i got to meet his family but they were all sad. then we went out to lunch and it was fun. i'll see them all again at the funeral in a few days, they don't think she'll make ( Read more... )

emilie is gone. i'm so lonely. even though she's not with me normally, knowing she's on another continent makes me want to throw up. actually i don't even think she's on that continent yet, she's just somewhere over the atlantic ocean right now. to solve this horrible crying matter i should go out and get horribly drunk, and i think i shall. don't ( Read more... )