"The twins loved the rides but it was the shops that really caught their attention. Their dream was to one day open one of their own and these were like nothing they had seen in the magical world. So bright and colourful, with an incredibly wide range of merchandise, both were drawn in like moths to a flame."
.......You know, combining this with that "radical ideas were foreign to Charity Burbage" line, it makes me think that Robst wants the books to go on exactly the same, except with no Weasleys.
It's the laziest form of AU, where you change one thing but don't explore any of the knock-on effects. See also: Teddy Lupin. For that matter, Remus/Tonks in general.
Perhaps, but the writing implies he wants to actively stop any ripple effects from happening, and imply that canon happened solely because of SCBE's actions.
Which also implies that he wants to murder Lupin and Tonks the instant their kid is born.
Or at least that canon this time round did. I think we're supposed to take the Shit Wizard Incident as happening right after the end of Deathly Hallows.
"So that's Percy and I guess we're counting future!Ron, and the other three are present!Ron (who we're presumably counting separately?) and someone and someone else. Oh, and Voldemort, but the mass-murdering would-be dictator who killed Lord Potter's own parents is irrelevant next to a pointless vendetta over something that's no longer happened and never will."
Didn't they also have Umbridge Kissed in Chapter 6 or so?
Actually, what did she do to deserve this, either? Sure, she's evil, but she hasn't done anything to become such yet. You'd think since Voldemort won't be returning in this timeline, she's stick to her office in the MoM forever, content with becoming patron saint of red tape.
Anyone with half a brain can write a moustache-twirling villain. The only difficulty is when they're written with the female gender, so I'm praying to god they don't make them flinch oversensitively to every little thing. For example, I read a fic that turned an expy of Sorceress Edea, child soldier army and brainwashed apathy and all, into a handmaiden who cowered behind her handler.
For example, I read a fic that turned an expy of Sorceress Edea, child soldier army and brainwashed apathy and all, into a handmaiden who cowered behind her handler.
What. Does Robst have any sockpuppets, do you know?
"They'd saved her favourite ride until after lunch, not wanting to spend the day wearing wet clothes. Her husband could easily perform a wandless drying charm on them though that was something they had no intention of advertising."
Wow. Not content with making Hermione into a brainless sex object, she isn't even able to operate as the idealized subservient housewife you'd expect her to turn into.
"Making sure the target was in the toilet should be fairly easy, the rest was simply ensuring his date didn't stand him up. Dousing Ronald in troll pheromones should ensure the big guy arrived, though with a club in his hand instead of flowers. Harry thought that Ronald being rogered to death by a randy rank troll was a fitting punishment for the animal who dared to touch his Hermione."
.......................Here I thought they were going to have the troll nutshot him so hard, his groin turned inside out. I honestly don't know what's worse.
One thing I missed (because I was so floored by how terrible that bit was - I'd skim-read ahead but managed to completely miss that this was their original plan) was that it's a waste of a perfectly good worldbuilding detail. Trolls have pheromones: of all the interesting things he could have done with that idea, he went with that?
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.......You know, combining this with that "radical ideas were foreign to Charity Burbage" line, it makes me think that Robst wants the books to go on exactly the same, except with no Weasleys.
Dear God, he's turning into Kieran Halcyon.
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Which also implies that he wants to murder Lupin and Tonks the instant their kid is born.
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The horse was slaughtered before Deathly Hallows was even leaked. I recommend giving up and resign yourself to quiet loathing.
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Didn't they also have Umbridge Kissed in Chapter 6 or so?
Actually, what did she do to deserve this, either? Sure, she's evil, but she hasn't done anything to become such yet. You'd think since Voldemort won't be returning in this timeline, she's stick to her office in the MoM forever, content with becoming patron saint of red tape.
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What. Does Robst have any sockpuppets, do you know?
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Wow. Not content with making Hermione into a brainless sex object, she isn't even able to operate as the idealized subservient housewife you'd expect her to turn into.
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.......................Here I thought they were going to have the troll nutshot him so hard, his groin turned inside out. I honestly don't know what's worse.
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