Hebrews 13 : 1
Title: Hebrews 13:1
Rating:NC17
Pairings/Characters:Nathan/Peter
Warnings:Incest
Word count: 2044
Written for: outbreaksignal
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters
Summary: Nathan's new-found religion leads him to question his relationship with Peter. The younger brother has to use all the weapons in his arsenal to convince Nathan that their 'sins' are worth it.
A/N: Beta read by sylargrrrl
"We can't do this anymore Pete, nothing about our...." Nathan trailed off and Peter filled in the blanks for him in his head. Relationship. "Nothing about it is good. I've been given a second chance, and I can't continue down this road with you, knowing where it might lead."
Nathan was stood, hands in pockets, all neat lines and strong colours. Charcoal grey suit, crisp white shirt and red tie. Peter could see his reflection in the shine of Nathan's shoes, and the sharp light reflecting from his crucifix. He stood by the window, bathed in morning light. The picture was so perfect, but it was a lie, something presentable and acceptable painted over heat and primal urge. It was a watercolour hung over a cave painting. "What, thats it? We start over? Have a relationship we've never had before? How natural is that, exactly? Because what we had is all we've ever known." Peter kept his voice steady, digging his nails into the flesh of his palm to stave off the tears. Nathan would dismiss him if he thought his argument came from a place of emotion.
"Peter, I love you. You're my brother, but we're not children anymore. We can't have whatever we want no matter the cost, and we know now that what we've done is wrong, we can repent as adults, and move on." Nathan gave a sharp nod as if that punctuated the argument and went for his coat, slung over a nearby chair. "I have to get to my meeting, you can have my secretary bring you some coffee in here if you want. Do you want me to call her?" He dusted off his coat, not making eye contact as he collected his things and checked his watch.
"No. I'm fine." Peter stood, frozen to the spot, afraid to move in case his legs buckled beneath him. He watched his brother go, and made it down to the street, onto the subway and back to his apartment before he crumbled to the floor, hot, angry tears flowing down his cheeks. He saw blood on his hand, and saw the perfect red crescents where his nails had punctured the skin.
----
Nathan stared at the blank hotel room wall and remembered the last time he'd been here. He had had a few too many, called Peter and spent the night indulging himself. He sucked in a breath and tried to banish the image which was making him hard despite himself. It was just flesh, blood, Pavlovian responses no more sophisicated than a dog slobbering when a bell was rung. It was not his soul talking. His soul was new, cleaned. He had died and been resurrected, and this time there was no blood to save him, no flawed human. There was only God, and His love.
He pulled open the drawer of the nightstand and took out the Bible. He stroked the cover, remembering those church services he had sat through as a child. He loved the rhythm of the mass, the names of the saints; Perpetua; Thomas Aquinas; Philomena. Peter. Peter the rock. Peter the forgiven sinner. "What do I do?" Nathan asked aloud. "I can feel my brother's pain but I can't heal it, not the way he wants me to. He calls it love but it's...it's more than that. It's obsession. Greed. Craving, I can't -"
The Bible spread flat, pages fluttering like shuffled cards as Nathan backed away, his shoulders hitting the headboard. There was no draft, no wind, just movement of the paper like deafening applause as the pages blurred before him. As suddenly as it began, the movement stopped, and the page tore midway down. Nathan waited, his heart pounding in his chest. When the paper remained still, he leaned over, and saw that the tear underlined a passage. "Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame." Peter's image flashed into his head, his skin hot to the touch as he writhed beneath him, so hungry for him that he would whimper if Nathan stopped moving in him for even a moment. "No.." he whispered to himself, as the pages started to move again. He looked around the room for signs of someone's presence but there was nothing, not a moving curtain or a shadow to betray what might be moving the book. When it stopped, he looked down and read the next passage; "Do not deprive each other, except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come again together, so that Satan will not tempt you."
He remembered when Peter was just 18, when he had found a weekend when they could be together. Their parents had been out of town and Nathan had surprised him, barging into his room and letting his brother run to him, his slim frame slamming into him as he smothered him in desperate kisses. Without a word they had stripped, falling into bed and clinging to each other as if they had been apart for years. Peter had gripped him so firmly, rambling into his ear "I waited Nathan, I didn't let anyone touch me, I waited for you, I didn't touch myself Nathan, I waited."
Angrily he hurled the book across the room, getting out of bed and pacing round until he had to grip the sides of the dressing table to stop himself from throwing something else. He looked into the mirror, and spun round as he saw Peter reflected, sitting in his bed. "Peter if this is some kind of joke-"
"I'm not laughing." Peter was wearing a white long sleeved tshirt and white boxers. Nathan flashed on a visit he had paid to him in college, he had been wearing something similar. Nathan had commented on how sexy he looked, and Peter had said... "Do you want me to keep them on?"
Nathan perched on the bed, suddenly aware that he was in his underwear too. "Are you reading my mind, is that what this is?"
Peter shook his head. "I don't need to. I was there, I think the same things you do. There are times when I want you so badly it hurts me. I know you're hurting. I know you want to love me."
"I do love you." Nathan cut him off. "I love you so much that it burns me up and if I let it get a hold on me...God has a purpose for me Peter, and I'm pretty sure it doesn't involve what you've come here for." He felt the weight on the bed shift as Peter crawled towards him and steeled himself. Hands were on his shoulders, the hands that had healed him, saved him, touched him, satisfied him. Peter started to massage him, and Nathan hardened again. "Please Peter, it's wrong, it's sinful, we both know -"
"How can it be?" Peter leaned in to whisper in his ear, sounding on the verge of tears. "Nathan you gave up your life for me, I brought you back from the dead. Who are we hurting? How can something so amazing, something which has made me cry out with ecstasy, be bad?"
Nathan felt Peter's lips on his neck, soft and gentle. He was whispering in his ear, the words just like the mass, their rhythm soothing. "I love you Nathan, make love to me, please, please touch me, please Nathan, I need you." Every word chipped at Nathan's resolve, he believed everything that Peter was saying, and believed that he believed it. He stared at one spot on the floor, trying to will away the erection which was beginning to ache. He leaned back against his brother and closed his eyes.
"Go and lay down". Nathan murmured, his head dropping as he felt the bed move with Peter's haste to do as he asked. He would show him, He would show little brother just how bad he could be. He stood and turned, his breath momentarily taken by the sight of Peter, still clothed, splayed out on the bed, legs open. "Boxers off, leave the shirt on". It was white. Virginal. It would remind him. He watched Peter strip and started to stroke himself to hardness. He wandered to the bathroom and brought back the small bottle of lotion, tossing it to Peter and nodding. This shorthand came so easy to them, it saved time, it was unspoken. Peter rubbed the lotion over his opening, his legs spread wide, before lying back and turning his head to the side.
"I'm ready, Nathan." His voice was barely more than a whisper now and he was shaking. Suddenly Peter looked so young.
Nathan stripped, still stroking himself as he knelt on the bed between Peter's legs. He took his brother's hand, still greasy from the lotion, and pressed it around his cock, giving it the most cursory slickness. He took Peter's wrists and held him down, nipping at his neck while he squirmed beneath him. He bit harder and Peter gasped. "Do you want me to show you how this could be bad Peter? How this might be a sin?" He jumped up suddenly and grabbed Peter's hips, pushing inside of him roughly and closing his eyes to the expression of pain on Peter's face.
"Nathan. Nathan!" Peter called out, grasping at the sheets and pushing himself onto Nathan's cock even as he pounded into him. Nathan looked at him as he snapped his hips forward. His head was thrown back, adam's apple bobbing and sweat beginning to shine on his skin. And he was smiling. Smiling so wide. Nathan was trying to teach him a lesson but it was clear that Peter wasn't learning. Frustrated, Nathan hooked one arm around Peter's leg and one hand on the bed behind Peter's head as he went deeper. Peter only moaned, reaching out to Nathan and running his hands over every inch of skin he could reach.
"Peter,it's...it's..." Go on, say it's wrong, say it's evil. Nathan started to slow down, sinking onto Peter's body and finally alllowing himself to kiss his brother. "I'm sorry Peter. 'M sorry." He felt Peter's hands on his back, stroking him as if accepting his apology. He slid an arm under Peter's back and pulled him until he was almost sitting, cuddling him close. He indulged himself in his favourite things about Peter's body, breathing in the scent of his long hair and feeling how Peter fit so easily into his arms.
"Nathan, let me come, please." Peter kissed his shoulder and Nathan put some space between them, reaching to stroke Peter to completion as he thrusted through his own orgasm. Peter sobbed as he came, holding Nathan so tight that he thought he'd never let go.
Nathan finally started to untangle their limbs and pulled Peter's shirt off, tossing it to the floor. For a while they just looked at each other, neither one really knowing who had won. "You look tired Pete." Nathan whispered.
"I am. I'm exhausted." Peter gave his lop-sided smile and Nathan melted just a little more as he pulled the covers and tucked Peter beneath them, hugging him close. When Nathan awoke the light had been turned off, and when he awoke the second time, Peter was gone. He listened for the sounds of him in the bathroom but there were none. Rolling over, he went back to sleep.
____
Nathan stirred and remembered. Peter wasn't here, but he was closer than ever before. He pulled himself out of bed, suddenly realising how disgustingly dirty he had been when he fell asleep, and went to go to the bathroom. There on the dresser was a piece of paper, on top of the Holy Bible he had flung across the room.
He looked down at the paper, and saw the word 'Peter' and the numbers 4 and 8. He reached for the Bible and turned to the first book of Peter, reading from chapter four, verse eight. "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins".
Rating:NC17
Pairings/Characters:Nathan/Peter
Warnings:Incest
Word count: 2044
Written for: outbreaksignal
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters
Summary: Nathan's new-found religion leads him to question his relationship with Peter. The younger brother has to use all the weapons in his arsenal to convince Nathan that their 'sins' are worth it.
A/N: Beta read by sylargrrrl
"We can't do this anymore Pete, nothing about our...." Nathan trailed off and Peter filled in the blanks for him in his head. Relationship. "Nothing about it is good. I've been given a second chance, and I can't continue down this road with you, knowing where it might lead."
Nathan was stood, hands in pockets, all neat lines and strong colours. Charcoal grey suit, crisp white shirt and red tie. Peter could see his reflection in the shine of Nathan's shoes, and the sharp light reflecting from his crucifix. He stood by the window, bathed in morning light. The picture was so perfect, but it was a lie, something presentable and acceptable painted over heat and primal urge. It was a watercolour hung over a cave painting. "What, thats it? We start over? Have a relationship we've never had before? How natural is that, exactly? Because what we had is all we've ever known." Peter kept his voice steady, digging his nails into the flesh of his palm to stave off the tears. Nathan would dismiss him if he thought his argument came from a place of emotion.
"Peter, I love you. You're my brother, but we're not children anymore. We can't have whatever we want no matter the cost, and we know now that what we've done is wrong, we can repent as adults, and move on." Nathan gave a sharp nod as if that punctuated the argument and went for his coat, slung over a nearby chair. "I have to get to my meeting, you can have my secretary bring you some coffee in here if you want. Do you want me to call her?" He dusted off his coat, not making eye contact as he collected his things and checked his watch.
"No. I'm fine." Peter stood, frozen to the spot, afraid to move in case his legs buckled beneath him. He watched his brother go, and made it down to the street, onto the subway and back to his apartment before he crumbled to the floor, hot, angry tears flowing down his cheeks. He saw blood on his hand, and saw the perfect red crescents where his nails had punctured the skin.
----
Nathan stared at the blank hotel room wall and remembered the last time he'd been here. He had had a few too many, called Peter and spent the night indulging himself. He sucked in a breath and tried to banish the image which was making him hard despite himself. It was just flesh, blood, Pavlovian responses no more sophisicated than a dog slobbering when a bell was rung. It was not his soul talking. His soul was new, cleaned. He had died and been resurrected, and this time there was no blood to save him, no flawed human. There was only God, and His love.
He pulled open the drawer of the nightstand and took out the Bible. He stroked the cover, remembering those church services he had sat through as a child. He loved the rhythm of the mass, the names of the saints; Perpetua; Thomas Aquinas; Philomena. Peter. Peter the rock. Peter the forgiven sinner. "What do I do?" Nathan asked aloud. "I can feel my brother's pain but I can't heal it, not the way he wants me to. He calls it love but it's...it's more than that. It's obsession. Greed. Craving, I can't -"
The Bible spread flat, pages fluttering like shuffled cards as Nathan backed away, his shoulders hitting the headboard. There was no draft, no wind, just movement of the paper like deafening applause as the pages blurred before him. As suddenly as it began, the movement stopped, and the page tore midway down. Nathan waited, his heart pounding in his chest. When the paper remained still, he leaned over, and saw that the tear underlined a passage. "Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame." Peter's image flashed into his head, his skin hot to the touch as he writhed beneath him, so hungry for him that he would whimper if Nathan stopped moving in him for even a moment. "No.." he whispered to himself, as the pages started to move again. He looked around the room for signs of someone's presence but there was nothing, not a moving curtain or a shadow to betray what might be moving the book. When it stopped, he looked down and read the next passage; "Do not deprive each other, except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come again together, so that Satan will not tempt you."
He remembered when Peter was just 18, when he had found a weekend when they could be together. Their parents had been out of town and Nathan had surprised him, barging into his room and letting his brother run to him, his slim frame slamming into him as he smothered him in desperate kisses. Without a word they had stripped, falling into bed and clinging to each other as if they had been apart for years. Peter had gripped him so firmly, rambling into his ear "I waited Nathan, I didn't let anyone touch me, I waited for you, I didn't touch myself Nathan, I waited."
Angrily he hurled the book across the room, getting out of bed and pacing round until he had to grip the sides of the dressing table to stop himself from throwing something else. He looked into the mirror, and spun round as he saw Peter reflected, sitting in his bed. "Peter if this is some kind of joke-"
"I'm not laughing." Peter was wearing a white long sleeved tshirt and white boxers. Nathan flashed on a visit he had paid to him in college, he had been wearing something similar. Nathan had commented on how sexy he looked, and Peter had said... "Do you want me to keep them on?"
Nathan perched on the bed, suddenly aware that he was in his underwear too. "Are you reading my mind, is that what this is?"
Peter shook his head. "I don't need to. I was there, I think the same things you do. There are times when I want you so badly it hurts me. I know you're hurting. I know you want to love me."
"I do love you." Nathan cut him off. "I love you so much that it burns me up and if I let it get a hold on me...God has a purpose for me Peter, and I'm pretty sure it doesn't involve what you've come here for." He felt the weight on the bed shift as Peter crawled towards him and steeled himself. Hands were on his shoulders, the hands that had healed him, saved him, touched him, satisfied him. Peter started to massage him, and Nathan hardened again. "Please Peter, it's wrong, it's sinful, we both know -"
"How can it be?" Peter leaned in to whisper in his ear, sounding on the verge of tears. "Nathan you gave up your life for me, I brought you back from the dead. Who are we hurting? How can something so amazing, something which has made me cry out with ecstasy, be bad?"
Nathan felt Peter's lips on his neck, soft and gentle. He was whispering in his ear, the words just like the mass, their rhythm soothing. "I love you Nathan, make love to me, please, please touch me, please Nathan, I need you." Every word chipped at Nathan's resolve, he believed everything that Peter was saying, and believed that he believed it. He stared at one spot on the floor, trying to will away the erection which was beginning to ache. He leaned back against his brother and closed his eyes.
"Go and lay down". Nathan murmured, his head dropping as he felt the bed move with Peter's haste to do as he asked. He would show him, He would show little brother just how bad he could be. He stood and turned, his breath momentarily taken by the sight of Peter, still clothed, splayed out on the bed, legs open. "Boxers off, leave the shirt on". It was white. Virginal. It would remind him. He watched Peter strip and started to stroke himself to hardness. He wandered to the bathroom and brought back the small bottle of lotion, tossing it to Peter and nodding. This shorthand came so easy to them, it saved time, it was unspoken. Peter rubbed the lotion over his opening, his legs spread wide, before lying back and turning his head to the side.
"I'm ready, Nathan." His voice was barely more than a whisper now and he was shaking. Suddenly Peter looked so young.
Nathan stripped, still stroking himself as he knelt on the bed between Peter's legs. He took his brother's hand, still greasy from the lotion, and pressed it around his cock, giving it the most cursory slickness. He took Peter's wrists and held him down, nipping at his neck while he squirmed beneath him. He bit harder and Peter gasped. "Do you want me to show you how this could be bad Peter? How this might be a sin?" He jumped up suddenly and grabbed Peter's hips, pushing inside of him roughly and closing his eyes to the expression of pain on Peter's face.
"Nathan. Nathan!" Peter called out, grasping at the sheets and pushing himself onto Nathan's cock even as he pounded into him. Nathan looked at him as he snapped his hips forward. His head was thrown back, adam's apple bobbing and sweat beginning to shine on his skin. And he was smiling. Smiling so wide. Nathan was trying to teach him a lesson but it was clear that Peter wasn't learning. Frustrated, Nathan hooked one arm around Peter's leg and one hand on the bed behind Peter's head as he went deeper. Peter only moaned, reaching out to Nathan and running his hands over every inch of skin he could reach.
"Peter,it's...it's..." Go on, say it's wrong, say it's evil. Nathan started to slow down, sinking onto Peter's body and finally alllowing himself to kiss his brother. "I'm sorry Peter. 'M sorry." He felt Peter's hands on his back, stroking him as if accepting his apology. He slid an arm under Peter's back and pulled him until he was almost sitting, cuddling him close. He indulged himself in his favourite things about Peter's body, breathing in the scent of his long hair and feeling how Peter fit so easily into his arms.
"Nathan, let me come, please." Peter kissed his shoulder and Nathan put some space between them, reaching to stroke Peter to completion as he thrusted through his own orgasm. Peter sobbed as he came, holding Nathan so tight that he thought he'd never let go.
Nathan finally started to untangle their limbs and pulled Peter's shirt off, tossing it to the floor. For a while they just looked at each other, neither one really knowing who had won. "You look tired Pete." Nathan whispered.
"I am. I'm exhausted." Peter gave his lop-sided smile and Nathan melted just a little more as he pulled the covers and tucked Peter beneath them, hugging him close. When Nathan awoke the light had been turned off, and when he awoke the second time, Peter was gone. He listened for the sounds of him in the bathroom but there were none. Rolling over, he went back to sleep.
____
Nathan stirred and remembered. Peter wasn't here, but he was closer than ever before. He pulled himself out of bed, suddenly realising how disgustingly dirty he had been when he fell asleep, and went to go to the bathroom. There on the dresser was a piece of paper, on top of the Holy Bible he had flung across the room.
He looked down at the paper, and saw the word 'Peter' and the numbers 4 and 8. He reached for the Bible and turned to the first book of Peter, reading from chapter four, verse eight. "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins".