To Ring the Bell Backward (Part 6)

[talesofyesac]

Title: To Ring the Bell Backward

Comments

[dobranocka]

First of all, I've got to say I really like the idea behind this. I'm also really happy you're switching povs, because that does give us, as readers, the picture from both perspectives, which works rather nicely in showing the conflict without automatically judging one side as wrong (yes, I'm a big fan of moral relativism and various areas of grey, so I hope I'll find some here). And seeing as how it is non-linear, it does make me very curious what had happened and what will happen and so on

[talesofyesac]

Thanks very much for reading and for the thoughtful critique. It really helps me when people take the time to review this thoroughly. I was unsure at first about the non-linear format, but, overall, I like how it's turned out.

You're right: there are some technical issues. I don't have anyone to beta this, and what I might catch in another person's work, I'll miss in my own. For instance, I did a command F search of "actually," and, yeah, you're right about that one paragraph. Yikes! I totally missed that. Thanks for pointing it out.

[dobranocka]

Glad to be of help. :) And it wasn't really excessive or anything, I just tend to be a little, uhm, over-sensitive about repetitions.

[arien_elensar]

“And what kind of person does that make me?”

Interesting to see where this goes! :)