Chapter 9 - Mad Season
As our chapter begins, we find more people arriving at the Mexican airport...
OBboy adjusted his backpack, stretching widely and grinning around the airport. "That plane flight was tight!! Champagne and fast food to chew up, seeing the sky, the clouds... enough of the plane. And ladies and gents, people from all around this beautiful world, finally big OBoy, yeah, the #1 has arrived to Mexico!"
Various passerby paused to gape, eyes conveying an obvious wonder as to whether or not OBoy was high.
Dan&SandwichBoy rolled his eyes, coming off the plane behind the excited OBoy. "Yeah, yeah... keep telling yourself that, Homoboy."
Darklord12 was behind him, sniffling loudly and looking like he was about to cry. "That Philly cheese was good... now, I need to arrive to Hiro's party with some donkeys on heroin."
Kagetsu was there too, obviously trying to keep order amongst the group. "Let's go pick up our luggage..."
Meanwhile, a little ways down the airport, the Jackass cast and crew were preparing to shoot a dangerous stunt that seemed to involve a giant mousetrap.
[It’s time for some song to remember dangerous stupid stunts... Corona, from The Minutemen, a.k.a. the Jackass Theme Song]
Johnny Knoxville smiled into the camera. "Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville! Welcome to Jackass!" In the background, the show's theme music began to play.
As the camera's continued to roll on Johnny, Steve-O and Ryan Dunn were setting up a big piece of Philly cheese on a mouse trap. Meanwhile, Bam Margera was trying to get down the escalators with a pogo stick, but in one move, he slipped and fell, tumbling down the escalator to the first floor, breaking his neck and dying instantly.
Ryan Dunn looked up, cursing. "Shit, there goes Bam."
Steve-O was obviously unconcerned. "Dude, no time for that. Let's get the mouse stunt started."
As he spoke, the cameras turned to focus on he and Ryan Dunn as Knoxville moved in to the frame, explaining the stunt to the audience. "This is the big mouse trap. Steve-O's going to play the cat..."
"What he really doesn't know is that Bam took a crap inside the cheese," Ryan commented to the cameraman.
While all three burst out in laughter, Steve-O was closing in on the cheese.
“Goddamn!” Darklord12 shouted, while grabbing OBoy's arm, shaking it violently to get his attention. “Nigga, go pick up my luggage... I want that Philly cheese!” He pointed at the cheese on the trap with his middle finger before taking off towards it as his tongue passes through his lips.
Dan&SandwichBoy sighed, watching Darklord12 as he swiftly approached the cheese. “Watch out for the big mouse...” He paused to wince, seeing that Darklord12 had reached the cheese before Steve-O, diving straight for it and howling in surprise and pain as the trap sprung on him, trapping his limbs under it. "Fuck!"
"...trap." Dan&SandwichBoy finished, too late. "Damn!"
Darklord12 began screaming and sobbing in pain, begging for help. "Holy crap, we gotta help him..." OBoy said.
Johnny Knoxville and the rest of the crew were standing in mixed awe and horror. "Whoa... that dude screwed up Steve-O's stunt..."
"Trapped like a rat," Steve-O added, the irony of the statement not lost on him. "Dudes, I was seriously regretting to this retarded idea, but hey... someone had to do it. Thank God it wasn't me..." He trailed off with a laugh. "Oh, boy... that's so going on the DVD..."
Ryan Dunn shook his head in wonder. "And he did it for free too..."
Darklord12 was still screaming. "Awwwwwwww!!!"
A passing unsympathetic tourist shouted, "Make that moron shut up! He's driving me crazy!"
Darklord12, pain forgotten, pulled out a mini UZI. "Drop dead!" He shot the man through the forehead, killing him. The man's body dropped and his one year old son and wife began to cry.
"Look what you've done, asshole," said OBoy, turning on the still trapped Darklord12 and kicking him in the head.
Dan&SanwichBoy covered his ears in annoyance to drown out the sound, shouting above the commotion."I can't stand all of this... Make them shut up! And someone please call the doctors!"
Blue Armor Boy, GradeA, and AngelBolt walked by, pausing to stare at the grotesque and unusual scene before them, which grew more interesting by the second as doctors arrived to attend the injured Darklord12.
GradeA shook his head at the crying child. "It's easy, all he needs is diapers and food."
Blue Armor Boy looked at the other boy, shocked at the statement. "He needs his freaking dad and he's dead, dammit!" He waved his arms wildly at GradeA, who remained stoic.
"Huh? I only see a dead body." Blue Armor Boy allowed his jaw to drop at GradeA's response, shaking his head and continuing to walk. He lead them over near Dan&SanwichBoy and Kagetsu.
Dan&SanwichBoy glanced over at them, gaze lingering for a moment. "Aren't you GradeA?"
GradeA nodded. "Uh-huh, that's me, boy."
"Holy shit, GradeA's at Mexico... owwie, my ribs!!" Darklord squeezed his eyes shut tightly as the medics moved him to a stretcher and wheeled him out of the airport.
"Hey, where's Angelbolt?" GradeA blinked around, looking for the missing girl.
Blue Armor Boy sighed. "She went to buy some shovels."
GradeA shrugged. "All right. But people don't fight at parties... not in Africa, at least."
"She has some arrangements to deal with. Poor baby needs to fix her problems," Blue Armor Boy lamented sadly.
"I knew it, you love her!", GradeA shouted triumphantly.
"Nah..." Blue Armor Boy shifted his weight from foot to foot nervously.
GradeA pointed at a black dildo poking out of Blue Armor Boy's bag. "Then what's th-"
He was cut off mid-question by OBoy. "What the hell you mofo's doing around here?"
“To have yo mamma on my porn flick, bitch!”, Blue Armor Boy retorted, showing OBoy condoms, a dildo and a DVR camera.
OBoy made a fist, shaking it at the offender. "You don't talk shit about my mamma, you motherfu..." He trailed off as Blue Armor Boy pulled out his mallet, then slowly backed away. "A'ight, no violence, dogg..." He was about to be nailed with the mallet, when suddenly something else caught Blue Armor Boy's eye and he scurried off. "Damn psycho freak."
GradeA shook his head sagely, watching as Blue Armor Boy began attending to a randomly abandoned cat in the airport. "Pussy is all he need."
Dan&SanwichBoy rolled his eyes. "Cats, actually."
GradeA shrugged as though unconcerned. "Human beings are really hard to understand... first, they do it with donkeys, now with horses, fishes..."
"Excuse me, brother... but what the hell are you talking about?" OBoy looked at GradeA skeptically.
"Human nature," GradeA replied simplistically.
"If there's anyone worth to bang, that'd be Star Way, dog! We'd be the shit at the party.... I can see it, yo! Cuddling, hugging, dancing, drinking... all that shit, you know?" He looked around at the group as though expecting agreement.
GradeA simply ignored him in favor of listening to his own stomach growling. "It's time to get some tacos..."
Dan&SandwichBoy nodded. "Good point." He cast a glance back at OBoy as they walked away. "Sicko.."
"I'm not sick!," GradeA shouted, startling those around him with the sudden outburst. Dan&SanwichBoy and Blue Armor Boy were the only ones that seemed unconcerned and the three boys and the cat made their way down the airport.
[A moment for silence and relax, as the Code Lyoko Voice Actors are having during their plane flight.]
En route to Mexico, Matthew Géczy and Barbara Weber-Scaff were talking on an airplane.
Matt relaxed back into the seat. "So tell me, how did you met Agent Marquez?"
Barbara shrugged a little. "It happened on a Monday morning.... also I can tell you about Marquez's conversation with some guy who was fired by Jero."
Matt leaned forward, clearly interested. "Okay, I'm all ears. This sounds interesting."
Agent Marquez was just arriving in France. Outside of the airport, a man was waiting for him. "Bienvenue vers la France, Monsieur Marquez. Voici les clefs à votre voiture, et appréciez la ville." (Welcome to France, mister Marquez. Here's the keys to your car and enjoy the city.)
Agent Marquez nodded. "Merci. Dites-maintenant moi où je puis placer Jerome Moucadet ou les Code Lyoko acteurs de voix." (Thanks. now tell me where I can locate Jerome Mouscadet or the Code Lyoko voice actors.)
"Ce fils d'une chienne m'a mis le feu après que j'aie piné son épouse," (That son of a bitch fired me after I banged his wife.) the man spat quite angerly. "Vous allez le tuer? Je puis-" (You're going to kill him? I can-)
Marquez cut him off. "Donnez-moi $200000 et je le ferai, mutilation positive et 15% des enchères de son corps chez Ebay." (Give me $200000 and I'll do it, plus mutilation and 15% from auctions of his body at Ebay.)
The man waved a hand dismissively. "Manière trop chère...Je ne puis pas me permettre cela. Je prierais plutôt à Dieu pour cela." (Way too expensive... I can't afford that. I'd rather pray to God for that.)
"Quoi que," (Whatever) Marquez said.
[No time for violence around the world, pay attention to our peace signal, the Peace Frog (The Doors)... whatever, don’t mind me because I can get as high as Jim Morrison used to be... listen & read, okay fellas?]
He rode in the Aston Martin on the streets, connecting his Ipod to the car and "Peace Frog" from The Doors started playing. As he drove through the streets, he checked his Palm constantly to recognize the Code Lyoko Voice Actors in order to give them the tickets to Mexico for Hiroshi's party. As he drove over a bridge, he noticed on his Palm that Jodi Forrest and Barbara Weber Scaff weren't that far from his location.
Agent Marquez grabbed a rocket launcher. "Bueno, a crearme una rampa..." (Well, to create myself a ramp)
Meanwhile, Jodi, Barbara, and Barbara's daughter were having a quiet breakfast at a sidewalk cafe. "What a good way to start the day before we go and record the Code Lyoko episodes. Matthew owes me donuts..." Jodi sipped coffee as she anticipated the donuts.
Barbara nodded in agreement. "Oh yeah... Plus, I'm gonna have to leave Audrey with somebody. Today's a busy day..."
Suddenly, a Aston Martin flew through the air, landing on the streets as Marquez used the brakes to avoid hitting the baby stroller. The baby burst into terrified tears, the women screamed, and Marquez leapt out of the car.
Barabra ranted at Marquez in French. "Fou de psyco! Comment pourriez-vous faire ceci?" (You psycho maniac! How could you do this?) She noticed the baby crying, picking her up and rocking her gently. "Oh, dear... don't cry, mommy's here..."
Maldita sea, la cagué.... (Dammit, I fucked it up) Marquez cursed to himself mentally. He looked around, gaze resting on Barbara and Jodi. "Are you women part of the Code Lyoko Voice Actors cast?"
Jodi was on her feet. "Hey, you. Why are you here? And how do you know our jobs?" She pointed an accusing finger at Marquez.
Marquez scratched his head. "Well... do you know who Hiroshi Yamabuki is?
"I can't remember right now, but it sounds like a Japanese terrorist to me," Jodi snapped back.
Deminios, (Dammit) Marquez thought. "Ahem... do you know... SamBlob?"
"Yes," both replied at the same time, and Jodi added, "What's up with him?"
"I'm not here because of him. But I'm glad you know about him. Just like Sam, Hiroshi's from TvTome. He won the lottery not that much ago and he's inviting the Code Lyoko Voice Actors to a TvTome party that will be hosted at Jalisco, Mexico."
"Really? That's awesome!" Jodi exclaimed.
"Here's the tickets for all of you. Let's hope all of you can make it to Mexico and enjoy the party over there. Goodbye, Jodi and Barbara." Marquez handed the excited women the tickets and climbed back into his car.
Barbara glanced at her watch. "Oh no, if we don't arrive at the studio in 5 minutes..."
"Want a ride?" Marquez asked.
"Well," Barbara said, obviously uncertain as Jodi climbed into Marquez's car. Jodi grabbed the baby from Barbara. "Yeah, hop in the Aston, Barbara!" Obviously still not convinced, Barbara hopped in and the ride to the studio began.
After listening to Barbara's story about her encounter with Marquez, Matt leaned back again, gazing forward at the chair in front of him. "Oh, geez... what are we dealing with?"
Barbara shrugged. "The stuff I've missed during pregnancy. The essence of life, to be more precise."
Matt shook his head, clearly worried. " But what about Audrey? She might need her mother alive. That Marquez guy seems to me like a serial killer..."
"I left her with her grandparents," Barbara assured him. "And Marquez is a nice person, if you get to know him closer..."
Matt blinked at her, voice rising in shock. "What the-"
"Hey!" Barbara cut him off with a slap. "I don't swing that way."
[No musical sounds to hear but the screaming of mutilated persons and others screaming after the acts of the Mara Salvatrucha gang, the one gang that make niggas look like toddlers.]
A flight to Cameroon was about to lift off, with JeremyHopper and Gino24 sharing a box in the cargo hold of the plane. But weirdly, the Mara Salvatrucha gang has appeared and has stolen the box that the guys were hiding in.
"Aquí debe estar nuestra cocaína," (Here should be our cocaine) the first man said to the others, pointing at the stolen box.
A second gang member pried the box open. "Veamos...y vino con dos maricones." (Let's see... and it came with two faggots).
A third voice broke in, eagerly. "¿Que hacemos con ellos?" (What should we do with them?)
"Los vendemos por partes," (We'll sell them by parts) the second man said casually, taping up the boys with duct tape.
"Nah... ya nadie quiere comprar órganos, usémoslos como bombas humanas para robar bancos," (Nah... now nobody wants to buy organs, let's use them as human bombs to rob banks) the first man suggested.
"Nah... pinches gringos culpan a ese Osama..." The third man said boredly. (Nah... damn Americans blame that Osama guy...)
Jeremy Hopper stirred slightly at the sound of their voices, blinking awake as he realized he was taped up. "Excuse me, but what are you saying?"
"¡¡Cállate niño baboso!!" (Shut up, you dumbass kid) The third man kicked him in the face, causing Jeremy Hopper to start crying.
"Hazlo callar, desgraciado," (Make him shut up, you bastard) the second man demanded.
Gino24 woke up, bashing Jeremy Hopper on the head to shut him up, knocking him out.
"Este huevón puede que nos sirva de algo..." (This asshole might be worthy) The first man pointed at Gino24 appreciatively.
The second member ignored the comment, knocking Gino24 out as well. "La última vez que metimos a alguien, mataron a Paco..." (The last time we got someone into this, Paco got killed)
[Today (Smashing Pumpkins) will be the greatest day some of the partiers will ever known. x1 will notice it soon.]
Meanwhile, another group had sat down to rest in a Starbucks.
"Shit, that explosion at the airport was weird..." Rodri glanced out of the large glass window as he spoke.
Star Way rolled her eyes. "Now, Bush is gonna go crazy and start up a war against Mexico just because some Americans died on the handicap bathroom."
Rodri snickered a little at the thought. "Heh... what kind of jackass would kill them?"
"I really don't know, Rodri. I just wanna live enough to party, though," Star Way responded.
Rodri lit up a Lucky Strike cigarette. "Yeah, we're better off that way."
x1 glared at the table. "Damn the fucktard who blew up the bathroom..." He looked up, staring out the window. "...Linii?"
As if she had heard him from outside, Linii glance over and saw her friends. Grinning, she ran inside and hugged them all, dragging a barely-conscious JoeDaHobo behind her. "Hi guys!!"
"Her girl! How are you doing," Star Way asked.
"Great, actually. Vili's gone, some crazy ninjas kidnapped him, but... yahh, I feel good now." Linii shrugged and grinned a little.
"Makeout time, yo!" x1 escorted Yizzy out of the Starbucks, making out with her even as they walked over to a telephone booth.
"Heh, look at them. So desperate..." Rodri smirked.
Linii put a hand on her hip. "And to think that Yizzy was the one telling me not to talk dirty shit with Hiro and cybering in front of people... blah, blah, blah..." She trailed off with a wave of her hand.
"Well, ever since x1 caught up with us, they've been wanting to make out badly the whole time," Star Way informed her.
"You could see it in their faces," Rodri added. "Soon, we will see x2 and x3, no doubt about that happening."
Star Way laughed as she glanced over at the phone booth, where a rather loud and messy makeout session had ensued. "Hahaha... they don't waste time... do they?"
Linii's jaw dropped as she saw x1 twist Yizzy's waist 540º. "I didn't even knew that was physically possible..."
Just then, in the trunk of Agent Whitey's car, Dylan035 was still inside the bag, bleeding profusely. Peering through the darkness, he spotted a mobile. He checked it quickly, then began dialing a random number. "Yay, it has signal... now, who the hell I should call? Hope the police gets to answer it..."
The phone in the booth where x1 and Yizzy were rang. "Damn it, they always ruin our moment." Yizzy complained.
"I'll handle it." x1 picked up the phone.
Dylan's voice was frantic on the other end. "Hello?! Please help me!! I'm inside a bag heading nowhere with two crazy rapists and-" He cut off as x1 hung up the phone. "Dammit!!"
"Who was it, honey?" Yizzy asked.
x1 shrugged nonchalantly. "Who cares, let's make out passionately!"
Star Way and Linii stared at the phone booth, which had begun to rock violently. "Holy fuck!! Whole kamasutra..."
The phone booth seemed to leapt up, performing a flip in the air!
"TWICE," Star Way and Linii exclaimed at the same time.
Agent Whitey was driving the car. He glanced over at Agent Blackey. "Where's my mobile?"
"Dumbass, you lost it? I'll ring it..." Agent Blackey pulled out his own mobile and dialed the number.
Dylan0513 stared in happy awe at the mobile. "Yay, I get help!" He answered it happily. "Help, I'm inside-" Agent Blackey hung up on him. "Shit, that's fucked up, man!"
Agent Whitey stepped on the brakes, and the car stops its movement.
Dylan0513 cursed to himself. "Oh, crap..."
Agent Whitey opened the trunk and Dylan climbed out of the bag and out of the trunk, running madly away.
Agent Blackey shook his head. "Fool, you lost our dinner meal!"
Agent Whitey shrugged. "Don't worry. We'll see him at the party. $500 says he'll die virgin."
Agent Blackey grinned. "Deal."
[Please remain silence as the interrogation proceeds.]
Back at the interrogating room, G-Force is strapped to a chair.
"Háganlo hablar a este desgraciado." (Make this bastard speak.) The second guard ordered.
G-Force spat at them. "I'll never reveal my secret for formidable fanfiction writing you industrial spies!!!"
The guard that was translating turned to the others."Dice que nunca revelará su secreto por sus prostitutas en California..." (He says he'll never reveal his secret about his prostitutes in California)
"¡¡Al diablo con tus cuentitos de mierda, confiésame la puta verdad!!" The first guard slapped G-Force. "¡¿Dónde está la droga, maricón?!" (To hell with your shitty stories, tell me the fucking truth!! Where's the drug, faggot?!)
[It's time to shake that laffy taffy!! Listen to Laffy Taffy from D4L.]
The translator wanted to have some fun. "He says you gotta break some day..."
G-Force turned his head away. "I'd prefer to die as the writer of the greatest fiction of all than to reveal my secret!" He spat on the translator. "You filthy ani-" he was cut off by a sharp kick. "Owww!!!"
The translator gave a wicked grin. "Este homosexual dice que le encantaría chuparle la verga..." (This fucker says he would love to suck cock)
The guard grinned. "Conque hasta joto salio el cabrón, pos ¡¡que se chingue!! ¡¡Tráete la bolsa y la cinta!!!" (So the fucker's gay, well...fuck him!....Bring in the bag and tape!!)
The threw a black bag over G-Force's head, dragging him, still bound with duct tape, over to a leather couch.
A gay guard was about to suck his dick. "Coño, me olvidé de la cita con el dentista... pero Juanito puede manejar la situación." (Fuck, I forgot my appointment with the dentist... but Juanito can handle the situation)
Another guard brought in Juanito, the gay guard's parrot. The gay guard smiled fondly at his pet. "Gózalo... "(enjoy it)
The gay guard left, and another guard took off G-Force's pants and placed the parrot next to his penis. To surprise of everyone om the room, the parrot began to tease around with the penis with its beak, drilling it weakly. The parrot's feathers were giving G-Force a weird, but satisfying feeling.
G-Force moaned slightly. "Hey, that's feeling good... yeah..." The guards around him tried to avoid laughing hard from the scene before them.
"Pobre de él cuando se entere que el loro lo está mamando..." (Poor him when he finds out the parrot's giving him head) The translator crooned in mock sympathy.
A female guard smiled at the thought. "Eh... hablaré un poco para que se la crea. (Ehh... I'll speak a bit so he buys it.) She walked over to G-Force. "Oye papi, se que la estás gozando..." (Hey papi, I know you're loving it)
"Hmmm... yeah, that's good," G-Force murmured.
G-Force moaned as the parrot began to swing his feet, masturbating him, as the guards were trying to hold back their laughter.
"Someone's taping this shit?" An English-speaking guard looked around hopefully.
"Yeah, there's two cameras around here," the translator assured him.
In the surveillance room, they were indeed being watched.
"Holy shit... parrot blowjob!!" One of the men monitoring the camera's was watching with wide eyes.
"What the fuck?" Another man in the room swiveled his chair around to look. "Oh my God, that's priceless!!"
"Let's put it on the web..." The first man created a link to the cameras and began posting the footage on various forums.
Back to GradeA, Dan&SandwichBoy and Blue Armor Boy, who were eating tacos. Blue Armor Boy smiled in contentment. "Burritos are good."
"Hey, there's a computer," GradeA pointed out, gesturing to the device.
"Gonna check tv.com?" Dan&SanwichBoy looked over at the computer.
GradeA nodded. "Sure." He clicked onto the Code Lyoko Tv.com forum, browsing silently for a moment before perking up. "Hey, what's this link?" He clicked on it.
Dan&SandwichBoy covered his mouth. "In the name of God, what the heck is that parrot doing?" He rushed to a nearby trashcan to vomit up his taco.
Blue Armor Boy covered his eyes, as did the cat on his shoulders. "Oh lord..."
Random tourists passed by the computer, some stopping to see the video. People began cheering for the parrot and calling him "Paulie."
"Paulie's got style..." GradeA said.
[Time to see more passengers go towards the party hosted at Mexico... listen to “The Passenger” from Iggy Pop, bitches.]
It's 15 minutes before the Brits and the cyber trio are set to board a plane for Mexico. The three Americans are making their way across the airport.
"Lotho, next time you wanna talk shit about me, you tell it in my goddamn face, okay?" Chibi snapped at him while Ray laughed at the joke Lotho had made about Chibi. "That wasn't funny, Ray."
LothoFoxburr rolled his eyes. "Whatever. 15 minutes and we're gone to Mexico."
Chibi glared at him. "Idiot, don't you see that we've got 18 minutes to to board the plane?"
"The airport switches the time to their interest, so that tourists can spend their time buying at Duty Free," Lotho informed her. He pointed to where vertig73 could be seen buying chocolates and TB3 could be seen buying two J. W. Blue Label bottles. "Or any other store and possibly end up missing their flights."
A random tourist cried out at that revelation. "Seriously?" He burst into tears. "That's fucked up."
Ransomed Heart got a look of sympathy on her face. "Ouch... sorry." She hugged the tourist to make him feel better, but the tourist felt horny enough to lick her neck. LothoFoxburr knocked him down with a chair before he attempted to have his way with Ray.
"You'll get plenty of sex at Mexico," Lotho said. "Now let's catch our plane."
"Oh, I want that pogo stick!!" Chibi shouted out of nowhere.
"What pogo stick?" Ransomed_Heart blinked around.
"You're quite confusing..." LothoFoxburr shook his head.
At the same time, the Brits were walking around searching for the gate. Alpha-Omega leaned over to talk to trikninja in a low voice. "The coke's safe, right Triki?"
Trikninja nodded. "Yeah... sure thing is pussy all night long at Hiroshi's party."
vertig73 smiled. "That is great. Why would TB3's brother wear a condom already?"
A porn actor, Ron Jeremy, passed by and snorted loudly, cracking up with laughter. "You gotta be shitting me... he's a geek, right?"
TB3 sighed sagely. "Indeed. And one of a unique kind, actually."
Team Lyoko seemed to swell up angrily. "Hey, I'm not wearing a fucking condom, okay vertig? You should know you... nevermind." He stopped himself. "Continue, Ron."
The Brits surround the porn actor as well as Lotho, Ray and Chibi did as they arrived at the group.
Ransomed Heart waved. "Howdy guys!" The groups saluted each other.
Trikninja mused aloud, after looking quickly at Chibi’s ticket. "Well, we share the same flight. Interesting."
LothoFoxburr was staring at the porn star. "You're Ron Jeremy?"
Ron Jeremy nodded. "It's good to know the fans who waste their time on the net downloading my flicks to recognize me. Or buying the DVD’s."
Chibi snickered at that. "Haha, and still..."
Team Lyoko blinked at her curiously. "There's something you wanna tell us, Chibi?"
"No, except that tossing rotten apples at Trick-or-Treaters is the shit," Chibi covered perfectly.
Ron Jeremy looked confused. "Huh? Anyways, the key in sex is to make your hookers..." He paused, looking at the girls. "Excuse me, ladies, feel safe and comfortable. And... allow me.." He grabbed Mandaz, but Vertig stared at him protectively."... Well.." He grabbed Ransomed Heart and no one objected this time, so he continued, "The key is on the ass. A good and tight ass is worth the ride." He spanked Ray, who felt wierdly happy.
Trikninja smirked. "Bloody hell, professional sex tutorial on the way..."
Quickly we travel back to Mexico where x1 and Yizzy are having anal sex in the phone booth...
Yizzy moaned loudly, as x1 held her by the waist and kept drilling into her.
"Who's your daddy, Yizzy? Who's yo daddy?!" x1 purred, kissing her neck, exciting Yizzy even more and causing her to moan louder.
Back at the Miami Airport...
Ron Jeremy was still lecturing. "The most important thing in any sexual intercourse of any kind is definately protection”. He showed condoms and other sex toys from his suitcase. "Just say hell no to radioactive ass, instant death with inmediate anal penetration. Squeeze it tight while you're doing the thrill ride..." He squeezed Ray's ass, and she moaned a bit, and he squeezed again but this time Ray, by instinct, kicked him in the nuts, sending him to the floor, rolling in agony. "My instrument of work," he moaned out.
"Sorry..." Ransomed Heart looked embarrassed and genuinely sorry.
Chibi didn't seem to care much though. "Ron, just give him-" She pointed at Lotho "- tips about how to appropriately use his penis."
"Go fetch the frisbee, Chibitch!!" LothoFoxburr threw a frisbee, but it landed on Cassius335's head instead, knocking him out.
Ron Jeremy was on his feet again. "I'm short on time, but have this instead." He handed out a DVD. "Where you guys are going to?"
TB3 answered for the group. "Mexico. Big party over there."
Ron Jeremy smiled. "All right, good luck then..." He signed the DVD and left.
Chibi was left holding the DVD. "Shit... we met Ron Jeremy... awesome..."
TB3 nodded. "Let's hope I can see Matt at Mexico. That would be even better!"
Cassius335 was just waking up after the hit in the head. "Matthew Géczy is a porn actor? What the...?"
Alpha-Omega rolled his eyes. "Hand him a bit of the tea..."
Trikninja smacked him. "Not here, you drunk fool! Let's get our arses on the plane right now."
"Yer, and these chocolates from Duty Free are delicious..." Vertig73 agreed, eating chocolates and serving to some to the people around him.
Team Lyoko smiled to himself mentally. If he only knew what I know... he thought to himself. "Okay, time to board the plane to our paradise!"
As they went to board the plane, another girl arrived. Morgan grinned wickedly at them, enjoying her play on words. "The hater of haters will cum!! Yes, cum to Mexico. All of you shall kiss my toes, bow to me and lick my bloody wrists!!"
A random tourist snorted, unimpressed. "Save that crap to yourself, goth emo poser."
Morgan flipped him the bird. "Fuck off..." She walked and found her seat... To her surprise, she was next to Ransomed Heart. "Ray? Oh yeah, this party will be banging!!"
Ray glanced up from the mystery novel she was reading. "Howdy!" She hugged Morgan. "Hey, why are you here?"
The other girl waved nonchalantly."After what happened between moi and Erynn, I need to complete my sexual task..."
Trikninja leaned over to listen. "This I must hear..."
LothoFoxburr smirked. "Time to apply Ron's tips, eh?"
Mandaz eyed him suspiciously. "Chibi, keep him busy..."
"I wanna hear her story," Chibi pouted.
Team Lyoko rolled his eyes. "Just give him a fucking laptop..."
LothoFoxburr shrugged. "Well..." He pulled out his own laptop. "Anything better than this?"
Chibi pointed triumphantly. "I knew it!! You have Ron's videos!!"
LothoFoxburr leaned to whisper in her ear. "We need to find Erynn quickly and bust out her password, or we're getting our asses banned."
Morgan started again. "As I was saying, last week, Erynn and I..."
LothoFoxburr was still muttering to Chibi. "When we cybered, something weird happened, ending up that we can't edit our posts anymore!"
"Damn," Chibi cursed loudly.
Morgan glared at them evilly. "You two gonna shut the fuck up? I wanna tell my story..."
LothoFoxburr glared right back. "Fine, I can have her ass. The end."
Chibi ignored him. "Yeah... tell it, anyways. Lotho and I have some business to talk. Ray, you too."
Ransomed Heart blinked in surprise. "What?"
Chibi fixed her with a glare. "Get your ass here... if you know what's good for you."
"But..." Ray trailed off as the realization hit. "Oh, that."
"Fuck them," Morgan said as the threesome began to tune her out. "Anyways, the god of sex will tell her really, really naughty experience with the lord of beautiness known as Erynn."
Morgan was interrupted again as Osiris appeared to sit down next to Cassius335. "Hello mates!"
"Osiris, you made it!" TB3 exclaimed. "I thought you missed the plane."
Osiris looked annoyed at the thought. "Bloody traffic kept me in the cab for a while, but thank God I arrived. Oh and Mandaz, sorry for not arriving at your party."
Mandaz waved dismissively. "Nah, it's okay. You missed some stuff, but in the end, it was good."
LothoFoxburr glanced at him curiously. "How did you find out about the Mexico party?"
"Star Way's thread at LF. And..." Osiris started.
Ransomed Heart cut him off with a random hug to avoid the possible mention of the cyber thread. "Howdy, Osiris!!"
Osiris blinked in shock at the random action, a bit happy. "Hey... As I was saying, dad's funeral kept me away from Mandaz's party."
"Shut up," Morgan ordered. She sniffled a little before starting to cry. "No one wants to her Morgan's story..."
TB3 looked pained. "Don't cry, Morgan. We were just happy for Osiris to reach the plane. Now, wipe your tears and tell us the porn story."
Trikninja nodded enthusiastically. "Porn story?! Yay!! Roll it on, baby!! Sanji-san is in mad love for naughty stuff right now..."
Alpha-Omega snickered. "Hah, potsie."
Morgan sighed. "Okay, I'll tell, but someone please lick my tears".
Vertig73 heard "tits" instead, and he went for it, but got slapped by Morgan with a spiked bracelet.
"Shit..." he touched his face, which was now bleeding. "Bloody hell..."
Trikninja stepped up to defend him. "She said tits..." Morgan glared at him. "..I mean tears."
"Fuckers... anyways..." Morgan launched into her story.
Erynn's bedroom was a mess, with a half empty bottle of sake and various beer cans scattered around it.
Erynn's voice drifted from inside her walk-in closet. "So, what do you think I should wear to Hiroshi's party?"
Morgan was sprawled out on the bed. "Pssh, like I care... damn fucker never invited my x-core self. Let him fuck himself in his own damn fucking party with all of his damn fucking friends..."
Erynn came out of closet in skimpy red Santa outfit, thinking briefly about x1. "Too much?"
Morgan sized up the outfit for a moment. "Yea...a little less around the legs..."
Erynn vanished into the closet again, emerging minutes later, in a sexy white mini-skirt. "How about this?"
"Smexy!" Morgan said approvingly.
[Time to get naughty like Erynn and Morgan to the rhythm of "Sugar" from Trick Daddy]
Erynn went to her pc, pulling up her music playlist as Trick Daddy's "Sugar" started playing. Erynn began to dance around Morgan by shaking her butt next to her lap. "Oh, fuck yeah," Morgan said, drinking more sake. "Shake that booty, shake, shake that booty... "
Morgan stood up and started to dance really close to Erynn, spanking her butt. Erynn pushed Morgan onto the bed, sitting on her lap and starting to make out with her. Both lay back on the bed, kissing and touching each other. Morgan stripped off Erynn's miniskirt, smiling wickedly into her mouth.
"Woot, red g-string!!" She kissed Erynn passionately as Erynn began to remove Morgan's t-shirt.
"You're so much better than Thomas... yeah, baby," Erynn moaned back at her.
Morgan snorted. "Fuck him, he's gay..." She kept kissing, mouth exploring Erynn's. "It's time for the smexy hardcore whip!!" She went for the whip in her backpack, which had several Naruto and Inuyasha pins, as well as pins of Slipknot and H.I.M. "Better yet, how about this?" She grabbed a knife and slit her wrists, showing the blood to her friend. "Lick it, honey."
OBboy adjusted his backpack, stretching widely and grinning around the airport. "That plane flight was tight!! Champagne and fast food to chew up, seeing the sky, the clouds... enough of the plane. And ladies and gents, people from all around this beautiful world, finally big OBoy, yeah, the #1 has arrived to Mexico!"
Various passerby paused to gape, eyes conveying an obvious wonder as to whether or not OBoy was high.
Dan&SandwichBoy rolled his eyes, coming off the plane behind the excited OBoy. "Yeah, yeah... keep telling yourself that, Homoboy."
Darklord12 was behind him, sniffling loudly and looking like he was about to cry. "That Philly cheese was good... now, I need to arrive to Hiro's party with some donkeys on heroin."
Kagetsu was there too, obviously trying to keep order amongst the group. "Let's go pick up our luggage..."
Meanwhile, a little ways down the airport, the Jackass cast and crew were preparing to shoot a dangerous stunt that seemed to involve a giant mousetrap.
[It’s time for some song to remember dangerous stupid stunts... Corona, from The Minutemen, a.k.a. the Jackass Theme Song]
Johnny Knoxville smiled into the camera. "Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville! Welcome to Jackass!" In the background, the show's theme music began to play.
As the camera's continued to roll on Johnny, Steve-O and Ryan Dunn were setting up a big piece of Philly cheese on a mouse trap. Meanwhile, Bam Margera was trying to get down the escalators with a pogo stick, but in one move, he slipped and fell, tumbling down the escalator to the first floor, breaking his neck and dying instantly.
Ryan Dunn looked up, cursing. "Shit, there goes Bam."
Steve-O was obviously unconcerned. "Dude, no time for that. Let's get the mouse stunt started."
As he spoke, the cameras turned to focus on he and Ryan Dunn as Knoxville moved in to the frame, explaining the stunt to the audience. "This is the big mouse trap. Steve-O's going to play the cat..."
"What he really doesn't know is that Bam took a crap inside the cheese," Ryan commented to the cameraman.
While all three burst out in laughter, Steve-O was closing in on the cheese.
“Goddamn!” Darklord12 shouted, while grabbing OBoy's arm, shaking it violently to get his attention. “Nigga, go pick up my luggage... I want that Philly cheese!” He pointed at the cheese on the trap with his middle finger before taking off towards it as his tongue passes through his lips.
Dan&SandwichBoy sighed, watching Darklord12 as he swiftly approached the cheese. “Watch out for the big mouse...” He paused to wince, seeing that Darklord12 had reached the cheese before Steve-O, diving straight for it and howling in surprise and pain as the trap sprung on him, trapping his limbs under it. "Fuck!"
"...trap." Dan&SandwichBoy finished, too late. "Damn!"
Darklord12 began screaming and sobbing in pain, begging for help. "Holy crap, we gotta help him..." OBoy said.
Johnny Knoxville and the rest of the crew were standing in mixed awe and horror. "Whoa... that dude screwed up Steve-O's stunt..."
"Trapped like a rat," Steve-O added, the irony of the statement not lost on him. "Dudes, I was seriously regretting to this retarded idea, but hey... someone had to do it. Thank God it wasn't me..." He trailed off with a laugh. "Oh, boy... that's so going on the DVD..."
Ryan Dunn shook his head in wonder. "And he did it for free too..."
Darklord12 was still screaming. "Awwwwwwww!!!"
A passing unsympathetic tourist shouted, "Make that moron shut up! He's driving me crazy!"
Darklord12, pain forgotten, pulled out a mini UZI. "Drop dead!" He shot the man through the forehead, killing him. The man's body dropped and his one year old son and wife began to cry.
"Look what you've done, asshole," said OBoy, turning on the still trapped Darklord12 and kicking him in the head.
Dan&SanwichBoy covered his ears in annoyance to drown out the sound, shouting above the commotion."I can't stand all of this... Make them shut up! And someone please call the doctors!"
Blue Armor Boy, GradeA, and AngelBolt walked by, pausing to stare at the grotesque and unusual scene before them, which grew more interesting by the second as doctors arrived to attend the injured Darklord12.
GradeA shook his head at the crying child. "It's easy, all he needs is diapers and food."
Blue Armor Boy looked at the other boy, shocked at the statement. "He needs his freaking dad and he's dead, dammit!" He waved his arms wildly at GradeA, who remained stoic.
"Huh? I only see a dead body." Blue Armor Boy allowed his jaw to drop at GradeA's response, shaking his head and continuing to walk. He lead them over near Dan&SanwichBoy and Kagetsu.
Dan&SanwichBoy glanced over at them, gaze lingering for a moment. "Aren't you GradeA?"
GradeA nodded. "Uh-huh, that's me, boy."
"Holy shit, GradeA's at Mexico... owwie, my ribs!!" Darklord squeezed his eyes shut tightly as the medics moved him to a stretcher and wheeled him out of the airport.
"Hey, where's Angelbolt?" GradeA blinked around, looking for the missing girl.
Blue Armor Boy sighed. "She went to buy some shovels."
GradeA shrugged. "All right. But people don't fight at parties... not in Africa, at least."
"She has some arrangements to deal with. Poor baby needs to fix her problems," Blue Armor Boy lamented sadly.
"I knew it, you love her!", GradeA shouted triumphantly.
"Nah..." Blue Armor Boy shifted his weight from foot to foot nervously.
GradeA pointed at a black dildo poking out of Blue Armor Boy's bag. "Then what's th-"
He was cut off mid-question by OBoy. "What the hell you mofo's doing around here?"
“To have yo mamma on my porn flick, bitch!”, Blue Armor Boy retorted, showing OBoy condoms, a dildo and a DVR camera.
OBoy made a fist, shaking it at the offender. "You don't talk shit about my mamma, you motherfu..." He trailed off as Blue Armor Boy pulled out his mallet, then slowly backed away. "A'ight, no violence, dogg..." He was about to be nailed with the mallet, when suddenly something else caught Blue Armor Boy's eye and he scurried off. "Damn psycho freak."
GradeA shook his head sagely, watching as Blue Armor Boy began attending to a randomly abandoned cat in the airport. "Pussy is all he need."
Dan&SanwichBoy rolled his eyes. "Cats, actually."
GradeA shrugged as though unconcerned. "Human beings are really hard to understand... first, they do it with donkeys, now with horses, fishes..."
"Excuse me, brother... but what the hell are you talking about?" OBoy looked at GradeA skeptically.
"Human nature," GradeA replied simplistically.
"If there's anyone worth to bang, that'd be Star Way, dog! We'd be the shit at the party.... I can see it, yo! Cuddling, hugging, dancing, drinking... all that shit, you know?" He looked around at the group as though expecting agreement.
GradeA simply ignored him in favor of listening to his own stomach growling. "It's time to get some tacos..."
Dan&SandwichBoy nodded. "Good point." He cast a glance back at OBoy as they walked away. "Sicko.."
"I'm not sick!," GradeA shouted, startling those around him with the sudden outburst. Dan&SanwichBoy and Blue Armor Boy were the only ones that seemed unconcerned and the three boys and the cat made their way down the airport.
[A moment for silence and relax, as the Code Lyoko Voice Actors are having during their plane flight.]
En route to Mexico, Matthew Géczy and Barbara Weber-Scaff were talking on an airplane.
Matt relaxed back into the seat. "So tell me, how did you met Agent Marquez?"
Barbara shrugged a little. "It happened on a Monday morning.... also I can tell you about Marquez's conversation with some guy who was fired by Jero."
Matt leaned forward, clearly interested. "Okay, I'm all ears. This sounds interesting."
Agent Marquez was just arriving in France. Outside of the airport, a man was waiting for him. "Bienvenue vers la France, Monsieur Marquez. Voici les clefs à votre voiture, et appréciez la ville." (Welcome to France, mister Marquez. Here's the keys to your car and enjoy the city.)
Agent Marquez nodded. "Merci. Dites-maintenant moi où je puis placer Jerome Moucadet ou les Code Lyoko acteurs de voix." (Thanks. now tell me where I can locate Jerome Mouscadet or the Code Lyoko voice actors.)
"Ce fils d'une chienne m'a mis le feu après que j'aie piné son épouse," (That son of a bitch fired me after I banged his wife.) the man spat quite angerly. "Vous allez le tuer? Je puis-" (You're going to kill him? I can-)
Marquez cut him off. "Donnez-moi $200000 et je le ferai, mutilation positive et 15% des enchères de son corps chez Ebay." (Give me $200000 and I'll do it, plus mutilation and 15% from auctions of his body at Ebay.)
The man waved a hand dismissively. "Manière trop chère...Je ne puis pas me permettre cela. Je prierais plutôt à Dieu pour cela." (Way too expensive... I can't afford that. I'd rather pray to God for that.)
"Quoi que," (Whatever) Marquez said.
[No time for violence around the world, pay attention to our peace signal, the Peace Frog (The Doors)... whatever, don’t mind me because I can get as high as Jim Morrison used to be... listen & read, okay fellas?]
He rode in the Aston Martin on the streets, connecting his Ipod to the car and "Peace Frog" from The Doors started playing. As he drove through the streets, he checked his Palm constantly to recognize the Code Lyoko Voice Actors in order to give them the tickets to Mexico for Hiroshi's party. As he drove over a bridge, he noticed on his Palm that Jodi Forrest and Barbara Weber Scaff weren't that far from his location.
Agent Marquez grabbed a rocket launcher. "Bueno, a crearme una rampa..." (Well, to create myself a ramp)
Meanwhile, Jodi, Barbara, and Barbara's daughter were having a quiet breakfast at a sidewalk cafe. "What a good way to start the day before we go and record the Code Lyoko episodes. Matthew owes me donuts..." Jodi sipped coffee as she anticipated the donuts.
Barbara nodded in agreement. "Oh yeah... Plus, I'm gonna have to leave Audrey with somebody. Today's a busy day..."
Suddenly, a Aston Martin flew through the air, landing on the streets as Marquez used the brakes to avoid hitting the baby stroller. The baby burst into terrified tears, the women screamed, and Marquez leapt out of the car.
Barabra ranted at Marquez in French. "Fou de psyco! Comment pourriez-vous faire ceci?" (You psycho maniac! How could you do this?) She noticed the baby crying, picking her up and rocking her gently. "Oh, dear... don't cry, mommy's here..."
Maldita sea, la cagué.... (Dammit, I fucked it up) Marquez cursed to himself mentally. He looked around, gaze resting on Barbara and Jodi. "Are you women part of the Code Lyoko Voice Actors cast?"
Jodi was on her feet. "Hey, you. Why are you here? And how do you know our jobs?" She pointed an accusing finger at Marquez.
Marquez scratched his head. "Well... do you know who Hiroshi Yamabuki is?
"I can't remember right now, but it sounds like a Japanese terrorist to me," Jodi snapped back.
Deminios, (Dammit) Marquez thought. "Ahem... do you know... SamBlob?"
"Yes," both replied at the same time, and Jodi added, "What's up with him?"
"I'm not here because of him. But I'm glad you know about him. Just like Sam, Hiroshi's from TvTome. He won the lottery not that much ago and he's inviting the Code Lyoko Voice Actors to a TvTome party that will be hosted at Jalisco, Mexico."
"Really? That's awesome!" Jodi exclaimed.
"Here's the tickets for all of you. Let's hope all of you can make it to Mexico and enjoy the party over there. Goodbye, Jodi and Barbara." Marquez handed the excited women the tickets and climbed back into his car.
Barbara glanced at her watch. "Oh no, if we don't arrive at the studio in 5 minutes..."
"Want a ride?" Marquez asked.
"Well," Barbara said, obviously uncertain as Jodi climbed into Marquez's car. Jodi grabbed the baby from Barbara. "Yeah, hop in the Aston, Barbara!" Obviously still not convinced, Barbara hopped in and the ride to the studio began.
After listening to Barbara's story about her encounter with Marquez, Matt leaned back again, gazing forward at the chair in front of him. "Oh, geez... what are we dealing with?"
Barbara shrugged. "The stuff I've missed during pregnancy. The essence of life, to be more precise."
Matt shook his head, clearly worried. " But what about Audrey? She might need her mother alive. That Marquez guy seems to me like a serial killer..."
"I left her with her grandparents," Barbara assured him. "And Marquez is a nice person, if you get to know him closer..."
Matt blinked at her, voice rising in shock. "What the-"
"Hey!" Barbara cut him off with a slap. "I don't swing that way."
[No musical sounds to hear but the screaming of mutilated persons and others screaming after the acts of the Mara Salvatrucha gang, the one gang that make niggas look like toddlers.]
A flight to Cameroon was about to lift off, with JeremyHopper and Gino24 sharing a box in the cargo hold of the plane. But weirdly, the Mara Salvatrucha gang has appeared and has stolen the box that the guys were hiding in.
"Aquí debe estar nuestra cocaína," (Here should be our cocaine) the first man said to the others, pointing at the stolen box.
A second gang member pried the box open. "Veamos...y vino con dos maricones." (Let's see... and it came with two faggots).
A third voice broke in, eagerly. "¿Que hacemos con ellos?" (What should we do with them?)
"Los vendemos por partes," (We'll sell them by parts) the second man said casually, taping up the boys with duct tape.
"Nah... ya nadie quiere comprar órganos, usémoslos como bombas humanas para robar bancos," (Nah... now nobody wants to buy organs, let's use them as human bombs to rob banks) the first man suggested.
"Nah... pinches gringos culpan a ese Osama..." The third man said boredly. (Nah... damn Americans blame that Osama guy...)
Jeremy Hopper stirred slightly at the sound of their voices, blinking awake as he realized he was taped up. "Excuse me, but what are you saying?"
"¡¡Cállate niño baboso!!" (Shut up, you dumbass kid) The third man kicked him in the face, causing Jeremy Hopper to start crying.
"Hazlo callar, desgraciado," (Make him shut up, you bastard) the second man demanded.
Gino24 woke up, bashing Jeremy Hopper on the head to shut him up, knocking him out.
"Este huevón puede que nos sirva de algo..." (This asshole might be worthy) The first man pointed at Gino24 appreciatively.
The second member ignored the comment, knocking Gino24 out as well. "La última vez que metimos a alguien, mataron a Paco..." (The last time we got someone into this, Paco got killed)
[Today (Smashing Pumpkins) will be the greatest day some of the partiers will ever known. x1 will notice it soon.]
Meanwhile, another group had sat down to rest in a Starbucks.
"Shit, that explosion at the airport was weird..." Rodri glanced out of the large glass window as he spoke.
Star Way rolled her eyes. "Now, Bush is gonna go crazy and start up a war against Mexico just because some Americans died on the handicap bathroom."
Rodri snickered a little at the thought. "Heh... what kind of jackass would kill them?"
"I really don't know, Rodri. I just wanna live enough to party, though," Star Way responded.
Rodri lit up a Lucky Strike cigarette. "Yeah, we're better off that way."
x1 glared at the table. "Damn the fucktard who blew up the bathroom..." He looked up, staring out the window. "...Linii?"
As if she had heard him from outside, Linii glance over and saw her friends. Grinning, she ran inside and hugged them all, dragging a barely-conscious JoeDaHobo behind her. "Hi guys!!"
"Her girl! How are you doing," Star Way asked.
"Great, actually. Vili's gone, some crazy ninjas kidnapped him, but... yahh, I feel good now." Linii shrugged and grinned a little.
"Makeout time, yo!" x1 escorted Yizzy out of the Starbucks, making out with her even as they walked over to a telephone booth.
"Heh, look at them. So desperate..." Rodri smirked.
Linii put a hand on her hip. "And to think that Yizzy was the one telling me not to talk dirty shit with Hiro and cybering in front of people... blah, blah, blah..." She trailed off with a wave of her hand.
"Well, ever since x1 caught up with us, they've been wanting to make out badly the whole time," Star Way informed her.
"You could see it in their faces," Rodri added. "Soon, we will see x2 and x3, no doubt about that happening."
Star Way laughed as she glanced over at the phone booth, where a rather loud and messy makeout session had ensued. "Hahaha... they don't waste time... do they?"
Linii's jaw dropped as she saw x1 twist Yizzy's waist 540º. "I didn't even knew that was physically possible..."
Just then, in the trunk of Agent Whitey's car, Dylan035 was still inside the bag, bleeding profusely. Peering through the darkness, he spotted a mobile. He checked it quickly, then began dialing a random number. "Yay, it has signal... now, who the hell I should call? Hope the police gets to answer it..."
The phone in the booth where x1 and Yizzy were rang. "Damn it, they always ruin our moment." Yizzy complained.
"I'll handle it." x1 picked up the phone.
Dylan's voice was frantic on the other end. "Hello?! Please help me!! I'm inside a bag heading nowhere with two crazy rapists and-" He cut off as x1 hung up the phone. "Dammit!!"
"Who was it, honey?" Yizzy asked.
x1 shrugged nonchalantly. "Who cares, let's make out passionately!"
Star Way and Linii stared at the phone booth, which had begun to rock violently. "Holy fuck!! Whole kamasutra..."
The phone booth seemed to leapt up, performing a flip in the air!
"TWICE," Star Way and Linii exclaimed at the same time.
Agent Whitey was driving the car. He glanced over at Agent Blackey. "Where's my mobile?"
"Dumbass, you lost it? I'll ring it..." Agent Blackey pulled out his own mobile and dialed the number.
Dylan0513 stared in happy awe at the mobile. "Yay, I get help!" He answered it happily. "Help, I'm inside-" Agent Blackey hung up on him. "Shit, that's fucked up, man!"
Agent Whitey stepped on the brakes, and the car stops its movement.
Dylan0513 cursed to himself. "Oh, crap..."
Agent Whitey opened the trunk and Dylan climbed out of the bag and out of the trunk, running madly away.
Agent Blackey shook his head. "Fool, you lost our dinner meal!"
Agent Whitey shrugged. "Don't worry. We'll see him at the party. $500 says he'll die virgin."
Agent Blackey grinned. "Deal."
[Please remain silence as the interrogation proceeds.]
Back at the interrogating room, G-Force is strapped to a chair.
"Háganlo hablar a este desgraciado." (Make this bastard speak.) The second guard ordered.
G-Force spat at them. "I'll never reveal my secret for formidable fanfiction writing you industrial spies!!!"
The guard that was translating turned to the others."Dice que nunca revelará su secreto por sus prostitutas en California..." (He says he'll never reveal his secret about his prostitutes in California)
"¡¡Al diablo con tus cuentitos de mierda, confiésame la puta verdad!!" The first guard slapped G-Force. "¡¿Dónde está la droga, maricón?!" (To hell with your shitty stories, tell me the fucking truth!! Where's the drug, faggot?!)
[It's time to shake that laffy taffy!! Listen to Laffy Taffy from D4L.]
The translator wanted to have some fun. "He says you gotta break some day..."
G-Force turned his head away. "I'd prefer to die as the writer of the greatest fiction of all than to reveal my secret!" He spat on the translator. "You filthy ani-" he was cut off by a sharp kick. "Owww!!!"
The translator gave a wicked grin. "Este homosexual dice que le encantaría chuparle la verga..." (This fucker says he would love to suck cock)
The guard grinned. "Conque hasta joto salio el cabrón, pos ¡¡que se chingue!! ¡¡Tráete la bolsa y la cinta!!!" (So the fucker's gay, well...fuck him!....Bring in the bag and tape!!)
The threw a black bag over G-Force's head, dragging him, still bound with duct tape, over to a leather couch.
A gay guard was about to suck his dick. "Coño, me olvidé de la cita con el dentista... pero Juanito puede manejar la situación." (Fuck, I forgot my appointment with the dentist... but Juanito can handle the situation)
Another guard brought in Juanito, the gay guard's parrot. The gay guard smiled fondly at his pet. "Gózalo... "(enjoy it)
The gay guard left, and another guard took off G-Force's pants and placed the parrot next to his penis. To surprise of everyone om the room, the parrot began to tease around with the penis with its beak, drilling it weakly. The parrot's feathers were giving G-Force a weird, but satisfying feeling.
G-Force moaned slightly. "Hey, that's feeling good... yeah..." The guards around him tried to avoid laughing hard from the scene before them.
"Pobre de él cuando se entere que el loro lo está mamando..." (Poor him when he finds out the parrot's giving him head) The translator crooned in mock sympathy.
A female guard smiled at the thought. "Eh... hablaré un poco para que se la crea. (Ehh... I'll speak a bit so he buys it.) She walked over to G-Force. "Oye papi, se que la estás gozando..." (Hey papi, I know you're loving it)
"Hmmm... yeah, that's good," G-Force murmured.
G-Force moaned as the parrot began to swing his feet, masturbating him, as the guards were trying to hold back their laughter.
"Someone's taping this shit?" An English-speaking guard looked around hopefully.
"Yeah, there's two cameras around here," the translator assured him.
In the surveillance room, they were indeed being watched.
"Holy shit... parrot blowjob!!" One of the men monitoring the camera's was watching with wide eyes.
"What the fuck?" Another man in the room swiveled his chair around to look. "Oh my God, that's priceless!!"
"Let's put it on the web..." The first man created a link to the cameras and began posting the footage on various forums.
Back to GradeA, Dan&SandwichBoy and Blue Armor Boy, who were eating tacos. Blue Armor Boy smiled in contentment. "Burritos are good."
"Hey, there's a computer," GradeA pointed out, gesturing to the device.
"Gonna check tv.com?" Dan&SanwichBoy looked over at the computer.
GradeA nodded. "Sure." He clicked onto the Code Lyoko Tv.com forum, browsing silently for a moment before perking up. "Hey, what's this link?" He clicked on it.
Dan&SandwichBoy covered his mouth. "In the name of God, what the heck is that parrot doing?" He rushed to a nearby trashcan to vomit up his taco.
Blue Armor Boy covered his eyes, as did the cat on his shoulders. "Oh lord..."
Random tourists passed by the computer, some stopping to see the video. People began cheering for the parrot and calling him "Paulie."
"Paulie's got style..." GradeA said.
[Time to see more passengers go towards the party hosted at Mexico... listen to “The Passenger” from Iggy Pop, bitches.]
It's 15 minutes before the Brits and the cyber trio are set to board a plane for Mexico. The three Americans are making their way across the airport.
"Lotho, next time you wanna talk shit about me, you tell it in my goddamn face, okay?" Chibi snapped at him while Ray laughed at the joke Lotho had made about Chibi. "That wasn't funny, Ray."
LothoFoxburr rolled his eyes. "Whatever. 15 minutes and we're gone to Mexico."
Chibi glared at him. "Idiot, don't you see that we've got 18 minutes to to board the plane?"
"The airport switches the time to their interest, so that tourists can spend their time buying at Duty Free," Lotho informed her. He pointed to where vertig73 could be seen buying chocolates and TB3 could be seen buying two J. W. Blue Label bottles. "Or any other store and possibly end up missing their flights."
A random tourist cried out at that revelation. "Seriously?" He burst into tears. "That's fucked up."
Ransomed Heart got a look of sympathy on her face. "Ouch... sorry." She hugged the tourist to make him feel better, but the tourist felt horny enough to lick her neck. LothoFoxburr knocked him down with a chair before he attempted to have his way with Ray.
"You'll get plenty of sex at Mexico," Lotho said. "Now let's catch our plane."
"Oh, I want that pogo stick!!" Chibi shouted out of nowhere.
"What pogo stick?" Ransomed_Heart blinked around.
"You're quite confusing..." LothoFoxburr shook his head.
At the same time, the Brits were walking around searching for the gate. Alpha-Omega leaned over to talk to trikninja in a low voice. "The coke's safe, right Triki?"
Trikninja nodded. "Yeah... sure thing is pussy all night long at Hiroshi's party."
vertig73 smiled. "That is great. Why would TB3's brother wear a condom already?"
A porn actor, Ron Jeremy, passed by and snorted loudly, cracking up with laughter. "You gotta be shitting me... he's a geek, right?"
TB3 sighed sagely. "Indeed. And one of a unique kind, actually."
Team Lyoko seemed to swell up angrily. "Hey, I'm not wearing a fucking condom, okay vertig? You should know you... nevermind." He stopped himself. "Continue, Ron."
The Brits surround the porn actor as well as Lotho, Ray and Chibi did as they arrived at the group.
Ransomed Heart waved. "Howdy guys!" The groups saluted each other.
Trikninja mused aloud, after looking quickly at Chibi’s ticket. "Well, we share the same flight. Interesting."
LothoFoxburr was staring at the porn star. "You're Ron Jeremy?"
Ron Jeremy nodded. "It's good to know the fans who waste their time on the net downloading my flicks to recognize me. Or buying the DVD’s."
Chibi snickered at that. "Haha, and still..."
Team Lyoko blinked at her curiously. "There's something you wanna tell us, Chibi?"
"No, except that tossing rotten apples at Trick-or-Treaters is the shit," Chibi covered perfectly.
Ron Jeremy looked confused. "Huh? Anyways, the key in sex is to make your hookers..." He paused, looking at the girls. "Excuse me, ladies, feel safe and comfortable. And... allow me.." He grabbed Mandaz, but Vertig stared at him protectively."... Well.." He grabbed Ransomed Heart and no one objected this time, so he continued, "The key is on the ass. A good and tight ass is worth the ride." He spanked Ray, who felt wierdly happy.
Trikninja smirked. "Bloody hell, professional sex tutorial on the way..."
Quickly we travel back to Mexico where x1 and Yizzy are having anal sex in the phone booth...
Yizzy moaned loudly, as x1 held her by the waist and kept drilling into her.
"Who's your daddy, Yizzy? Who's yo daddy?!" x1 purred, kissing her neck, exciting Yizzy even more and causing her to moan louder.
Back at the Miami Airport...
Ron Jeremy was still lecturing. "The most important thing in any sexual intercourse of any kind is definately protection”. He showed condoms and other sex toys from his suitcase. "Just say hell no to radioactive ass, instant death with inmediate anal penetration. Squeeze it tight while you're doing the thrill ride..." He squeezed Ray's ass, and she moaned a bit, and he squeezed again but this time Ray, by instinct, kicked him in the nuts, sending him to the floor, rolling in agony. "My instrument of work," he moaned out.
"Sorry..." Ransomed Heart looked embarrassed and genuinely sorry.
Chibi didn't seem to care much though. "Ron, just give him-" She pointed at Lotho "- tips about how to appropriately use his penis."
"Go fetch the frisbee, Chibitch!!" LothoFoxburr threw a frisbee, but it landed on Cassius335's head instead, knocking him out.
Ron Jeremy was on his feet again. "I'm short on time, but have this instead." He handed out a DVD. "Where you guys are going to?"
TB3 answered for the group. "Mexico. Big party over there."
Ron Jeremy smiled. "All right, good luck then..." He signed the DVD and left.
Chibi was left holding the DVD. "Shit... we met Ron Jeremy... awesome..."
TB3 nodded. "Let's hope I can see Matt at Mexico. That would be even better!"
Cassius335 was just waking up after the hit in the head. "Matthew Géczy is a porn actor? What the...?"
Alpha-Omega rolled his eyes. "Hand him a bit of the tea..."
Trikninja smacked him. "Not here, you drunk fool! Let's get our arses on the plane right now."
"Yer, and these chocolates from Duty Free are delicious..." Vertig73 agreed, eating chocolates and serving to some to the people around him.
Team Lyoko smiled to himself mentally. If he only knew what I know... he thought to himself. "Okay, time to board the plane to our paradise!"
As they went to board the plane, another girl arrived. Morgan grinned wickedly at them, enjoying her play on words. "The hater of haters will cum!! Yes, cum to Mexico. All of you shall kiss my toes, bow to me and lick my bloody wrists!!"
A random tourist snorted, unimpressed. "Save that crap to yourself, goth emo poser."
Morgan flipped him the bird. "Fuck off..." She walked and found her seat... To her surprise, she was next to Ransomed Heart. "Ray? Oh yeah, this party will be banging!!"
Ray glanced up from the mystery novel she was reading. "Howdy!" She hugged Morgan. "Hey, why are you here?"
The other girl waved nonchalantly."After what happened between moi and Erynn, I need to complete my sexual task..."
Trikninja leaned over to listen. "This I must hear..."
LothoFoxburr smirked. "Time to apply Ron's tips, eh?"
Mandaz eyed him suspiciously. "Chibi, keep him busy..."
"I wanna hear her story," Chibi pouted.
Team Lyoko rolled his eyes. "Just give him a fucking laptop..."
LothoFoxburr shrugged. "Well..." He pulled out his own laptop. "Anything better than this?"
Chibi pointed triumphantly. "I knew it!! You have Ron's videos!!"
LothoFoxburr leaned to whisper in her ear. "We need to find Erynn quickly and bust out her password, or we're getting our asses banned."
Morgan started again. "As I was saying, last week, Erynn and I..."
LothoFoxburr was still muttering to Chibi. "When we cybered, something weird happened, ending up that we can't edit our posts anymore!"
"Damn," Chibi cursed loudly.
Morgan glared at them evilly. "You two gonna shut the fuck up? I wanna tell my story..."
LothoFoxburr glared right back. "Fine, I can have her ass. The end."
Chibi ignored him. "Yeah... tell it, anyways. Lotho and I have some business to talk. Ray, you too."
Ransomed Heart blinked in surprise. "What?"
Chibi fixed her with a glare. "Get your ass here... if you know what's good for you."
"But..." Ray trailed off as the realization hit. "Oh, that."
"Fuck them," Morgan said as the threesome began to tune her out. "Anyways, the god of sex will tell her really, really naughty experience with the lord of beautiness known as Erynn."
Morgan was interrupted again as Osiris appeared to sit down next to Cassius335. "Hello mates!"
"Osiris, you made it!" TB3 exclaimed. "I thought you missed the plane."
Osiris looked annoyed at the thought. "Bloody traffic kept me in the cab for a while, but thank God I arrived. Oh and Mandaz, sorry for not arriving at your party."
Mandaz waved dismissively. "Nah, it's okay. You missed some stuff, but in the end, it was good."
LothoFoxburr glanced at him curiously. "How did you find out about the Mexico party?"
"Star Way's thread at LF. And..." Osiris started.
Ransomed Heart cut him off with a random hug to avoid the possible mention of the cyber thread. "Howdy, Osiris!!"
Osiris blinked in shock at the random action, a bit happy. "Hey... As I was saying, dad's funeral kept me away from Mandaz's party."
"Shut up," Morgan ordered. She sniffled a little before starting to cry. "No one wants to her Morgan's story..."
TB3 looked pained. "Don't cry, Morgan. We were just happy for Osiris to reach the plane. Now, wipe your tears and tell us the porn story."
Trikninja nodded enthusiastically. "Porn story?! Yay!! Roll it on, baby!! Sanji-san is in mad love for naughty stuff right now..."
Alpha-Omega snickered. "Hah, potsie."
Morgan sighed. "Okay, I'll tell, but someone please lick my tears".
Vertig73 heard "tits" instead, and he went for it, but got slapped by Morgan with a spiked bracelet.
"Shit..." he touched his face, which was now bleeding. "Bloody hell..."
Trikninja stepped up to defend him. "She said tits..." Morgan glared at him. "..I mean tears."
"Fuckers... anyways..." Morgan launched into her story.
Erynn's bedroom was a mess, with a half empty bottle of sake and various beer cans scattered around it.
Erynn's voice drifted from inside her walk-in closet. "So, what do you think I should wear to Hiroshi's party?"
Morgan was sprawled out on the bed. "Pssh, like I care... damn fucker never invited my x-core self. Let him fuck himself in his own damn fucking party with all of his damn fucking friends..."
Erynn came out of closet in skimpy red Santa outfit, thinking briefly about x1. "Too much?"
Morgan sized up the outfit for a moment. "Yea...a little less around the legs..."
Erynn vanished into the closet again, emerging minutes later, in a sexy white mini-skirt. "How about this?"
"Smexy!" Morgan said approvingly.
[Time to get naughty like Erynn and Morgan to the rhythm of "Sugar" from Trick Daddy]
Erynn went to her pc, pulling up her music playlist as Trick Daddy's "Sugar" started playing. Erynn began to dance around Morgan by shaking her butt next to her lap. "Oh, fuck yeah," Morgan said, drinking more sake. "Shake that booty, shake, shake that booty... "
Morgan stood up and started to dance really close to Erynn, spanking her butt. Erynn pushed Morgan onto the bed, sitting on her lap and starting to make out with her. Both lay back on the bed, kissing and touching each other. Morgan stripped off Erynn's miniskirt, smiling wickedly into her mouth.
"Woot, red g-string!!" She kissed Erynn passionately as Erynn began to remove Morgan's t-shirt.
"You're so much better than Thomas... yeah, baby," Erynn moaned back at her.
Morgan snorted. "Fuck him, he's gay..." She kept kissing, mouth exploring Erynn's. "It's time for the smexy hardcore whip!!" She went for the whip in her backpack, which had several Naruto and Inuyasha pins, as well as pins of Slipknot and H.I.M. "Better yet, how about this?" She grabbed a knife and slit her wrists, showing the blood to her friend. "Lick it, honey."