(no subject)
Title: Between Here and Now and Forever, Chapter 14
Fandom: Harry Potter
Characters: The Founders, various OCs
Rating: PG
Summary: PARTY TIME. Rowena has fun. Mostly.
Chapter 1
Master Founders post
Chapter 13
As soon as they entered, Rowena shrieked with joy and ran off to greet a grandfatherly-looking man. She left Godric standing alone in the middle of the room, and he had the impression of being circled by ravening beasts. Well, really, it was socialites. That was worse.
Helga waved, and walked over to him. At the look on his face, she said, "Godric, you look like somebody's about to make you eat raw worms."
"Would cooked worms taste any better?" he asked doubtfully.
"I wouldn't know," she said. "Come on, let's go annoy people with titles. Did Rowena leave you here all alone? She really ought to know better."
"Do you know any of these people?" said Godric, looking around bewilderedly.
"I've done plants for most of them," said Helga. "Ooh, there's Katarin Vaurien!" She pointed at an aloof-looking auburn-haired woman.
"Are you going to go say hello?"
"No, she's an evil bitch," said Helga cheerfully. "Basil and I had to clear up a fungus monster issue for them years ago; we went through hell and they never properly thanked us. I did promise to do my worst if they didn't pay me, though, so that's something."
Godric wasn't entirely sure what Helga's worst would be, and he decided he didn't want to find out. He looked around the crowds of people for someone, anyone he recognized, and blinked. "...Helga, isn't that your brother?"
"...oh god," said Helga. "Where? He'll be asking for money. I thought the point of this party was fundraising?"
"No, it's -- er. Other things," said Godric. "Anyway, let's avoid Leo and --"
"HELGA! How are you?" Elmira Lockhart had (either very sneakily or perhaps completely obliviously) taken them both by surprise by coming up from behind. Aside from her graying brown hair, she looked rather like an older version of her daughter. Helga gave Godric a dirty look over her mother's shoulder as she was hugged.
"I'm fine, Mum," said Helga, smiling. "Classes are going well, and, er, Basil's fine."
"Where is he? I haven't seen him since last year!" said Mistress Lockhart.
"I'm wondering that myself," said Helga, looking briefly as though she were contemplating finding a heavy blunt object and allowing it to find Basil's head for her. She quickly smiled again. "I asked him to tell the students what to expect; some of them are Muggleborn peasants' children."
Mistress Lockhart nodded. "I think I see Rowena over there, talking to someone who looks terribly important -- and where's Godric?"
"He's a bit hard to miss, Mum," said Helga, pointing at Godric. Godric waved.
"...oh," said Mistress Lockhart, blinking up at him. "You've grown a bit, I see."
"It might've been odd if I'd shrunk," said Godric, who always felt awkward around people who'd only known him before the curse. Not that he ever didn't feel awkward. But more awkward.
"...yes, I suppose it might," said Mistress Lockhart, who apparently realized that this was not a good topic of conversation. "And you're teaching Transfiguration? I remember you were quite good at that -- wasn't it your first bit of magic?"
Godric laughed. "Yes, unfortunately. It was self-defense, but nobody else saw it that way except Aurelius Eriskyne."
"I'll admit, I'm curious -- you were my only Muggleborn student, Godric, and I don't think I ever met your family -- what do the Muggle families of the students here think of it? Do you have to kidnap them?"
Helga burst out laughing. "Lord Slytherin would have a fit..."
"I would have a fit," said Godric.
"You already have fits," Helga pointed out.
"Well, maybe if you didn't send me outside to yell at the army, I wouldn't --"
"It made sense!" Helga said. "And it worked!"
"Well, I think fits are perfectly justified in the case of armies," Godric said, refusing to back down on this issue.
"...so, no kidnapping, then," said Mistress Lockhart, who had always had an admirable ability to work out the basics of a situation from bizarre arguments pertaining to it. (It was probably from working with children, Godric thought. He often wished he was as good at that as she had been.) "Do you talk to them or fool them into thinking it's something else?"
"Oh, Rowena handles that all, she does it really well," said Helga. "I think because she lived among Muggles for a bit. Not that that ended well, but she likes them a lot better than I think I would if that'd happened to me. But I think, actually -- didn't Rowena invite Lord de Malfoie?" Helga asked.
Godric shrugged. "I don't know, it's not like anybody asked me who to invite."
"There's a Muggle here?" asked Mistress Lockhart. "I thought it was mostly Council people. Even Lady Aeaeae is here!"
Godric had always assumed that Rowena's mum and Helga's got on well; as they were both witches who were mothers, he had assumed they probably talked a lot about making potions and soup and bedtime stories, and how to ensure that they would always win arguments about doing chores or having to go to bed on time. But that had been when he was nine. He realized now that Mistress Lockhart had the same cheerful tone that Helga used when she was the exact opposite of pleased. But he didn't have much time to wonder about it before Helga said, quite bluntly, "I know. We aren't speaking."
"Ah. Well, perhaps that's for the best," said Mistress Lockhart. "She's... she can be very unpleasant."
And before either of them could ask what the other meant, a silvery-blond person had rushed up to Helga excitedly. "There you are! We asked to be put on this assignment specifically to see if you had any more plants with seeds that blow up -- I'm nearly out, you see." It was a woman, Godric realized, not a man, although she dressed like one, and was skinny enough to be mistaken for one. She had an accent, and wore what looked like a uniform; blue on top and white on the bottom, with a winged pig in the middle. He had seen it before.
"I'll send Basil for them, if he ever shows up," said Helga, through clenched teeth.
"Want me to go get him for you?" asked the woman. He realized now that she must be one of Lady Aeaeae's bodyguards, the Aurae Aurelii. He'd known a girl who had been training for that with Aurelius Eriskyne. "I can get Hatim to do one of his neat numbersy things," said the Aura.
"No, I'm sure he'll be along any minute now. Oh! Godric, this is Aurelia Alfhild Bergfalk. Alfhild, this is Godric Gryffindor, our Transfiguration professor."
"Pleased to meet you!" she said, extending a hand to be shook. "And call me Alfhild. The title sounds nice enough on its own, but we travel in packs, so everybody's Aurelia and Aurelius all the time. I've got a real name." She cocked her head. "...You know, you don't look half-giant."
"I'm not," said Godric, blinking.
"Oh well. Nice try, anyhow," she said, then turned back to Helga. "Listen, if I could have those seeds ASAP that would be great, because --" and here she looked around quickly before continuing "-- Hatim and I want to find someplace to get married while we're in Britain."
"Why don't you just --" Helga started.
"Well, if we go with my family's rules, the Veela marriage ordeal takes a month and there's a small chance he'll get eaten, and if we go with his, Hatim's brother is trying to talk him out of it since I'm 'not of the Book.'" Here she made a face. "You know, the one who thinks he should inherit instead of Nada. Arse. Anyway, neither of us has time for any of that, really, not the way things have been going in Damascus lately. We're doing wonderfully -- got this brilliant map that shows it all. Arithmantic methods, he says. Good solid barbarian meanness, says I." Here she grinned. "Anyway, Sheffield's got security pretty well covered and it'll be a lot of wards, so we probably won't be missed."
Godric had begun to wander off at this point, since he didn't want to stand around for a conversation he was clearly not part of, but at the name Sheffield, he turned around again.
"Who?" he asked.
"Aurelia Sheffield? My boss?" said Bergfalk, frowning. "Why? You trying to avoid her?"
She had made it! Maybe this party wouldn't be so awful after all. "You know, I don't think I was. D'you know where she is?"
"Last time I saw her she was out there somewhere," said Aurelia Bergfalk, waving vaguely towards the entrance to the Great Hall.
"Thanks," said Godric. He wandered out of the Great Hall, and saw Basil coming down the corridor leading the students. "Helga's angry with you."
"I told her I was going to be late. And we had staircase issues," Basil said.
"Her brother's here," Godric said by way of explanation.
"Oh god, no wonder," said Basil, cringing. "I'll see you at the feast, I hope." And like a doomed general he led his army of students into the Great Hall.
Godric walked out of the Hall, past Lord Slytherin, who stood talking in hushed tones to some men he didn't recognize. He heard voices in the Entrance Hall, and he paused to un-transfigure all of the garishification Rowena and Jasper had committed upon his person and his clothing. Nervously, he tried to get his hair to do something other than be messy, but for all he knew he was making it worse, so he just gave up and walked into the Entrance Hall.
She was speaking to two men. All three wore the same winged pig uniform, and as she spoke rapidly in Latin, she pointed to a parchment.
"Al-Aziz, I want you to go here first. If anyone not on the list tries to come in, I want your wards to immobilize them, and I want you to tie them to me so I know immediately. After you've set them up, inform me. Bogdanovich, you're going to be watching the guests inside the Great Hall. Keep a close eye on our known necromancers, and make sure ben Schlomo stays out of trouble, but don't kill anyone."
"What do you mean, Aurelia Sheffield? I kill someone? Me? You insult!" said the brown-haired man. "You insult very much, Aurelia, very much!"
"We all saw the bodies in Reykjavík, Bogdanovich," said the other, darker-skinned man. "They were extremely dead. Also in pieces. I could not sleep for weeks."
"Yes, well, let's let bygones be bygones for now," she said, "and do as I tell you."
"Where have you sent my... where have you sent Alfhild?" asked the dark man, who Godric assumed must be al-Aziz.
"She's inside, wanted to talk to Hufflepuff. Find her when you're done with the wards." She sounded rather annoyed, and Godric felt bad for her.
But finally the two other Aurae left, and he could see her clearly as she studied the parchment. She had cut her hair, and seemed to have learnt how to stand still for more than five seconds, but it was definitely her.
* * *
Rowena was having a good night so far. She had talked to people! It had not been about how untrustworthy she was! She had found herself mainly in the company of Ari Stigandrison, and they busied themselves making fun of everybody else. It was something Ari was uniquely suited for. "Aethelmaer Glendower's looking very ill, don't you think?"
"He's getting kicked off the Council, I heard," said Rowena, smugly.
"Really? Not old Aethie! But who will stand up for the rights of the noble necromancers now?" asked Ari.
She snorted. "Not me, that's for certain."
"Oh, that's right, you had that vampire thing happen," said Ari, shrugging it off more gracefully than she had. "You have the worst luck with men, you know. Speaking of which, who's that?" he asked, pointing at Lord de Malfoie, who was talking excitedly at Aurelius Bogdanovich.
"That," said Rowena, "is a married, extremely religious Muggle with two children. I assume the lady is his wife or something similar."
"So he's not your type, then," said Ari.
"Or yours, for that matter," she said. "But maybe we should rescue him from Bogdanovich."
"He did make quite a mess in Iceland," said Ari. "Father's contacts in the Althing were severely unimpressed. I think they were demanding severed limbs by way of payment. I mean, ones that they didn't get out of the deal already."
She blanched. "Would you excuse me? De Malfoie's got an army, and I'd hate if he got killed. I'll talk to you at dinner."
She walked over to the two of them. "Excuse me, I'm sorry to interrupt -- Aurelius Bogdanovich?"
"Ah! Lady Ravenclaw! Such a pleasure it is to meet you again! I shall kiss your hand," said Bogdanovich.
"Actually," said Rowena, removing her hand from his grasp quickly, "I was wondering if you could check on my mother for me? I don't want her to get lost; it's such a big castle, you see, and you know, a lady is prone to being overwhelmed when her sense of direction is tested."
"Oh, yes, yes. Anything for the lady! I will find her and bring her here, in no more time than it takes for the thestral to climb into the sky!" And with that, he left.
"He's quite mad," she told Lord de Malfoie once he was out of earshot. "But you know how it is, one of those people we had to invite."
"Ooh, I know how that is," said Lady de Malfoie. "Remember your cousins?" she demanded. "Remember last Easter?"
"Let's not talk about last Easter, it gives me a headache," said Lord de Malfoie.
"He has the most dreadful cousins," she said, gleefully.
"This is Lady Ravenclaw, Aveline. She's a witch. I'm sure she's got far more interesting things than to talk about my stupid cousins."
"You know, I think I know what sort of cousins you mean," said Rowena. "Did they stay for months and months and months, eating you out of house and home, and complain about everything?"
"Exactly!" said Lady de Malfoie.
"I'm going to go find Julian," said Lord de Malfoie, looking disgruntled.
"Oh dear. I hope I haven't offended him," said Rowena. "He isn't that sort of guest at all."
"Oh, he's always grumpy like that," she said. "He's not a night person."
They had a long conversation about cousins who never left, and a polite argument about what to do with rude servants. Rowena had always considered Muggles a bit barbaric for using humans instead of house-elves. A house-elf you could punish corporeally and not worry, but humans could think, so the usual punishments would just justify whatever ill-feeling they held towards their masters. (And she thought it seemed a little cruel, but she decided not to mention that.)
She left when Basil brought in the students, and Lord de Malfoie came back with Julian in tow. And then she realized what had been bothering her all through the discussion of servants. The room was distinctly missing its twelve-foot-six baffled Transfigurator. Who was pretty much an essential, if she was going to pass the whole thing off as a fundraising and publicity stunt.
When she ran into Helga, she said "Where's Godric?"
"Gone to talk to Sheffield," said Helga, shrugging. "Probably wants to talk theory or -- oh! That reminds me! Hatim and Alfhild are off planning their escape, since after the feast they're sneaking off to get married. But for all official intents and purposes, Jasper's showing them wards or something."
"Is Jasper in on it, or is he going to turn up and loudly ask where they are while I'm making excuses for them?" Rowena asked.
"I don't know, I just heard this from Basil," said Helga. "Who, incidentally, is lucky to be alive, so if you run into him and he's not forthcoming, threaten him with me."
"All right," said Rowena.
"And my brother's here," she added, glaring. "He brought some girl called Mary with him, but I had the Aurae kick her out. Who invited my brother?"
"I've no idea," said Rowena. "You know I hate him."
"He's going to ask you for money," said Helga.
"I'll tell him I haven't got enough for me," she said. "It's the gods' honest truth! Anyway, I have to go find Godric and possibly hit him. Although maybe I should be merciful, considering. ...are you certain he wants to talk theory with Sheffield?"
Helga shrugged. "Apparently he knows her."
"Huh. Maybe he's thinking of someone else," said Rowena. "You know how bad he is with names. I suppose I'd better go save him." She turned to look around for Aurae, but almost immediately ended up face to face with Helga's brother Leo. He smiled winningly. "Rowena! How are you?"
There was no denying it. He was still absolutely ridiculously good-looking, and it was just not fair. Rowena had to reconsider her initial decision to simply tell him off. He was far too pretty.
She decided to terrify him instead.
"Oh! Leo! I haven't seen you for so long!" she said. "I'm so glad I ran into you!" She hugged him.
He seemed encouraged. "Yeah, me too. Listen, I was wondering if you'd do a favor for an old friend."
"What a coincidence! Because, you know, I was just wondering the same thing," she said. She put an arm around his shoulder. "How would you like to make a great deal of money, Leo?"
He looked pleasantly surprised. "How?"
"Let me preface this, Leo, with a heartfelt statement," she said. "I like you. You're so independent! And you don't give up! I feel we're kindred spirits, really."
"Really?"
"Really," she said, putting her other hand over her heart. "And I have chosen you for this little scheme of mine, Leo, because I feel you deserve it. You deserve the recognition, and the praise --"
"And the money?"
"And the money," she said, glad he had his priorities in order. "Doubtless you have a wonderful business plan. And I'm willing to split it with you fifty-fifty."
"But I thought --"
"But it's, as I mentioned, a great deal of money, so you've nothing to worry about. You'll want for nothing for the rest of your life," she said.
"What do I need to do?" he asked. That baffled expression on his lovely face was simply glorious. She grinned.
"Marry me," she said. He looked shocked, and before he could get out another word, she continued. "I know what you're thinking! You're thinking, 'What on earth is she on about?' You're thinking 'How will this be of any profit to anyone?' Well, let me tell you. My poor dear husband, may Hades care for his shade, saw fit to lock up all the money until I remarried. Now, you'd think a charming lady such as myself would be able to find a husband relatively quickly, but alas! They all seem to think that I murdered him! Murdered! In cold blood! Me! Can you imagine what such people must think of me?"
"Er," said Leo, who looked to be imagining very well. She was impressed. She usually had to do all the work for him.
"And so they have spread vicious rumors and lies! Oh, these are horrible people, Leo. I pray every day to Hermes that wonderful people like you may never know the sting of meeting those people. It's dreadful! They won't rest until they've ruined a lady's reputation beyond repair! They may smile, and laugh, but their evil knows no bounds! Why, that rumor about having an army of Inferi with him at the lead, I have no idea where that one came from. Do you?"
"Well," said Leo, who looked as though he might want to get a word in edgewise. Or maybe flee. It was hard to tell, with Leo.
"No! Of course not!" she continued, ignoring him. "Because you know me better than that. And why I should need a Horcrux, well, I just don't know. I mean, if I was going to make a Horcrux, I would certainly kill someone less important than my own husband. Wouldn't you think that's the most sensible route?"
"I suppose." Leo was looking deeply uncomfortable by now. She could almost see the connections forming in his tiny mind. Wait a moment, he was thinking. I'm not that important. What if she kills me? What if she kills me right now?
"I'm so glad you understand me, Leo," she said, winding the arm around his shoulder tighter. "I feel like we're at the top of a cliff, Leo, you and I, at the top of a cliff, looking down at the magnificent vista of the future that lies before us! And all we need is a little push before we can just fly." She emphasized this with a hearty pat on the back.
"Er. Well. I'd be glad to help you out," said Leo, hesitantly. "But."
"But?" She affected disappointment.
"But I don't really think, er, Ethelinda would understand," said Leo.
"...Ethelinda?" Rowena asked blankly.
"Ethelinda! My girl."
"Helga said your girl was called Mary."
"Ethelinda Mary," said Leo quickly. "Sometimes she goes by her middle name. Anyway--"
"Where is she, anyway?"
"She couldn't come," said Leo. "Very sick. Pox."
"Well, I'm sure if you explained to her --"
"She gets very jealous," said Leo. "Poor dear. Very jealous. Listen, it was wonderful seeing you again, but I have to go, er. Meet with someone."
"If you ever want to reconsider, I'll be here!" she shouted after him. And he was gone. Satisfied with a job well done, Rowena walked out into the corridor to laugh maniacally.
Spotting Lord Salazar talking to her father and someone she didn't recognize, she decided she'd better save it for later, and worry about business now. She walked over to ask if he'd seen Godric.
Her father was speaking, she realized, in a whisper. "...not my fault she --" And as soon as he saw her, he fell silent. Lord Salazar and the other man turned and looked at her, as if waiting for her to go away.
"I thought you were supposed to be going deaf," she said flatly, and without bothering to raise her voice.
Lord Salazar cleared his throat. "What did you want?"
"I wanted to know if you'd seen Godric, but since I haven't been invited into your fabulous wrinkly-old-man treehouse with the 'no girls' sign, I suppose I can just go look for him myself."
"Rowena!" said her father. "Don't be petulant."
"I'm not being petulant! This is a natural reaction to being deemed untrustworthy by default! You didn't even deign to have a normal conversation with me all through your last visit," she snapped at her father. Then she turned to Lord Salazar. "And you think I'm going to go haring off to sabotage the school I came up with because I'm, I don't know, mad, and I just can't resist doing nasty things. And you," she snarled, turning to the third man, "who in Hades are you and what are you going to accuse me of?"
He raised an eyebrow. "You sure you want to keep her around, Salazar? She seems a bit mad. And probably untrustworthy." He smirked.
"Why do you think I keep you around, then?" Lord Salazar asked him mildly. "Lady Ravenclaw, may I introduce you to Ximon Etxazarra? He's on the Wizards' Council."
"I apologize for my semblance of madness, Lord Etxazarra," she said stiffly. "But would somebody please explain what's going on here?"
"Dealing with a situation, same as we always do," said Etxazarra. "And I'm not a lord."
"It concerns Gualterus," said Lord Salazar. "I think she should know." He looked significantly at Rowena's father.
He cringed. "'Wena --"
"DAD! Don't call me that!"
"-- it's about your mother."
"If she's trying to marry me off again without my knowledge, I'm going to be very upset," said Rowena, "but what does it have to do with anything?"
He sighed. "I've been pretending the hearing potions don't work so she won't go elsewhere to talk to her lackeys, and I don't think you have much to worry about, 'Wena."
"I said --"
"I think," he continued, "she's planning on killing me off so she can keep Fudge under better control."
Rowena stopped obsessing over the first syllable of her name. "...no," she said quietly. "No, she can't."
"See," said Etxazarra, "this is what happens when you marry a murderous political climber, Gualt, you can't --"
"YOU SHUT UP," shouted Rowena, drawing her wand, and pointing it at his face. "You shut up. Just shut up, and don't smirk, and... and..." In a sudden moment of overlucidity, she realized that she was threatening a member of the Wizards' Council, a crime for which she could be sent to Drear. A crime which would do very little for her father. With great effort, she withdrew her wand and let her hand drop.
"I told you, I didn't want to upset her," her father was saying. She felt like he was in a different room, in a different country, talking about somebody else.
"She had to know sooner or later," said Lord Slytherin.
"She's very sensitive --"
"Oversensitive," said Etxazarra.
"No," said Rowena. "I won't let her." Drear was bloody well worth it. She turned, clutching her wand like a dagger, and started stalking back towards the Great Hall. Plan be damned. Feast be damned. Mum be damned.
"Lady Ravenclaw, where are you --"
"Rowena! Don't --"
"Remigro!" snapped Etxazarra, and Rowena was jerked back in front of the three. Etxazarra snatched her wand as she started to hex him. "Are you mad, or stupid?" he demanded.
"Give it back," she snarled at him, and tried to take another step -- but she was stuck fast. "Let me go! I'll --"
"She's got the Aurae, Rowena. You'll be killed," said her father.
"I have precedent! I have -- Athena said -- but she can't!"
"Why not?" asked Etxazarra.
"Ximon, don't agitate her," said Lord Salazar.
"You taught me to read," she said to her father, blinking back tears. "You taught me to read, she can't do that. I won't let her."
"Definitely mad," said Etxazarra. "Did it perhaps occur to you that this isn't an urgent situation?"
"We're working on ways to keep her from moving too soon," said Salazar.
"Oh, too soon! What's enough time, then?" Rowena demanded. "What's enough time, tell me, for my father to live? Are we talking years here, or have you decided that he's had enough time if he survives another month? Are you just deciding this by yourself, or are you in consultation with your sister Atropos, or --"
"My sister was murdered," said Lord Salazar harshly.
"...I. Er. I forgot that you had a sister," she said uneasily. "I'm. Sorry? Really. Only I thought she'd died normally."
Something about her surprise softened his expression. "You couldn't have known," he said. "Actually, you remind me a bit of her. Very idealistic. Hated everybody. Wrote terrible poetry."
"I'm not idealistic!" said Rowena. She tried to stop sniffling, and failed. "...and my poetry's not that bad," she added half-heartedly. She had never told anybody but Ari about the poetry. Not even Helga. "What's, er. What's your solution?"
"We don't know yet," said Etxazarra.
"But I'll tell you when we've worked something out," said Lord Salazar. "Meanwhile, I have something that may help prepared for the feast."
"You'll tell me really, or you'll just tell me roundaboutly, or you'll just tell someone else and assume they'll tell me, because you want me to react in a certain way?" Rowena demanded.
"I'll tell you really," said Lord Salazar.
"What's at the feast, then?" she asked.
"You'll know it when you see it," said Lord Salazar.
She sighed. "This had all better work," she told him.
"It will," he said. And she nearly believed him. "Master Gryffindor, incidentally, went that way," he said, pointing towards the Entrance Hall."
"Thanks," she said. "I'm going to kill him. ...not really," she added quickly, just in case anyone should have any doubts. Retrieving her wand and unsticking her feet, she dried her eyes and departed in search of Godric.
Author's Notes: The gen zine I mentioned last chapter will probably be called The Hogwarts Express, and is still recruiting. If you're at all interested, go to norisis' journal and comment!
Rowena's reference to Athena here is not just random -- she's referring to the part of The Eumenides where Athena, acting as judge, rules that Orestes, having killed his mother in revenge because she killed his father, does not deserve to be punished by the Furies, because fathers are more important as parents than mothers. This blanket generalization seems pretty bizarre nowadays, but if anyone would cite Greek tragedy as legal precedent at times of great emotional distress, you just know it would be Rowena.
Chapter 15
Fandom: Harry Potter
Characters: The Founders, various OCs
Rating: PG
Summary: PARTY TIME. Rowena has fun. Mostly.
Chapter 1
Master Founders post
Chapter 13
As soon as they entered, Rowena shrieked with joy and ran off to greet a grandfatherly-looking man. She left Godric standing alone in the middle of the room, and he had the impression of being circled by ravening beasts. Well, really, it was socialites. That was worse.
Helga waved, and walked over to him. At the look on his face, she said, "Godric, you look like somebody's about to make you eat raw worms."
"Would cooked worms taste any better?" he asked doubtfully.
"I wouldn't know," she said. "Come on, let's go annoy people with titles. Did Rowena leave you here all alone? She really ought to know better."
"Do you know any of these people?" said Godric, looking around bewilderedly.
"I've done plants for most of them," said Helga. "Ooh, there's Katarin Vaurien!" She pointed at an aloof-looking auburn-haired woman.
"Are you going to go say hello?"
"No, she's an evil bitch," said Helga cheerfully. "Basil and I had to clear up a fungus monster issue for them years ago; we went through hell and they never properly thanked us. I did promise to do my worst if they didn't pay me, though, so that's something."
Godric wasn't entirely sure what Helga's worst would be, and he decided he didn't want to find out. He looked around the crowds of people for someone, anyone he recognized, and blinked. "...Helga, isn't that your brother?"
"...oh god," said Helga. "Where? He'll be asking for money. I thought the point of this party was fundraising?"
"No, it's -- er. Other things," said Godric. "Anyway, let's avoid Leo and --"
"HELGA! How are you?" Elmira Lockhart had (either very sneakily or perhaps completely obliviously) taken them both by surprise by coming up from behind. Aside from her graying brown hair, she looked rather like an older version of her daughter. Helga gave Godric a dirty look over her mother's shoulder as she was hugged.
"I'm fine, Mum," said Helga, smiling. "Classes are going well, and, er, Basil's fine."
"Where is he? I haven't seen him since last year!" said Mistress Lockhart.
"I'm wondering that myself," said Helga, looking briefly as though she were contemplating finding a heavy blunt object and allowing it to find Basil's head for her. She quickly smiled again. "I asked him to tell the students what to expect; some of them are Muggleborn peasants' children."
Mistress Lockhart nodded. "I think I see Rowena over there, talking to someone who looks terribly important -- and where's Godric?"
"He's a bit hard to miss, Mum," said Helga, pointing at Godric. Godric waved.
"...oh," said Mistress Lockhart, blinking up at him. "You've grown a bit, I see."
"It might've been odd if I'd shrunk," said Godric, who always felt awkward around people who'd only known him before the curse. Not that he ever didn't feel awkward. But more awkward.
"...yes, I suppose it might," said Mistress Lockhart, who apparently realized that this was not a good topic of conversation. "And you're teaching Transfiguration? I remember you were quite good at that -- wasn't it your first bit of magic?"
Godric laughed. "Yes, unfortunately. It was self-defense, but nobody else saw it that way except Aurelius Eriskyne."
"I'll admit, I'm curious -- you were my only Muggleborn student, Godric, and I don't think I ever met your family -- what do the Muggle families of the students here think of it? Do you have to kidnap them?"
Helga burst out laughing. "Lord Slytherin would have a fit..."
"I would have a fit," said Godric.
"You already have fits," Helga pointed out.
"Well, maybe if you didn't send me outside to yell at the army, I wouldn't --"
"It made sense!" Helga said. "And it worked!"
"Well, I think fits are perfectly justified in the case of armies," Godric said, refusing to back down on this issue.
"...so, no kidnapping, then," said Mistress Lockhart, who had always had an admirable ability to work out the basics of a situation from bizarre arguments pertaining to it. (It was probably from working with children, Godric thought. He often wished he was as good at that as she had been.) "Do you talk to them or fool them into thinking it's something else?"
"Oh, Rowena handles that all, she does it really well," said Helga. "I think because she lived among Muggles for a bit. Not that that ended well, but she likes them a lot better than I think I would if that'd happened to me. But I think, actually -- didn't Rowena invite Lord de Malfoie?" Helga asked.
Godric shrugged. "I don't know, it's not like anybody asked me who to invite."
"There's a Muggle here?" asked Mistress Lockhart. "I thought it was mostly Council people. Even Lady Aeaeae is here!"
Godric had always assumed that Rowena's mum and Helga's got on well; as they were both witches who were mothers, he had assumed they probably talked a lot about making potions and soup and bedtime stories, and how to ensure that they would always win arguments about doing chores or having to go to bed on time. But that had been when he was nine. He realized now that Mistress Lockhart had the same cheerful tone that Helga used when she was the exact opposite of pleased. But he didn't have much time to wonder about it before Helga said, quite bluntly, "I know. We aren't speaking."
"Ah. Well, perhaps that's for the best," said Mistress Lockhart. "She's... she can be very unpleasant."
And before either of them could ask what the other meant, a silvery-blond person had rushed up to Helga excitedly. "There you are! We asked to be put on this assignment specifically to see if you had any more plants with seeds that blow up -- I'm nearly out, you see." It was a woman, Godric realized, not a man, although she dressed like one, and was skinny enough to be mistaken for one. She had an accent, and wore what looked like a uniform; blue on top and white on the bottom, with a winged pig in the middle. He had seen it before.
"I'll send Basil for them, if he ever shows up," said Helga, through clenched teeth.
"Want me to go get him for you?" asked the woman. He realized now that she must be one of Lady Aeaeae's bodyguards, the Aurae Aurelii. He'd known a girl who had been training for that with Aurelius Eriskyne. "I can get Hatim to do one of his neat numbersy things," said the Aura.
"No, I'm sure he'll be along any minute now. Oh! Godric, this is Aurelia Alfhild Bergfalk. Alfhild, this is Godric Gryffindor, our Transfiguration professor."
"Pleased to meet you!" she said, extending a hand to be shook. "And call me Alfhild. The title sounds nice enough on its own, but we travel in packs, so everybody's Aurelia and Aurelius all the time. I've got a real name." She cocked her head. "...You know, you don't look half-giant."
"I'm not," said Godric, blinking.
"Oh well. Nice try, anyhow," she said, then turned back to Helga. "Listen, if I could have those seeds ASAP that would be great, because --" and here she looked around quickly before continuing "-- Hatim and I want to find someplace to get married while we're in Britain."
"Why don't you just --" Helga started.
"Well, if we go with my family's rules, the Veela marriage ordeal takes a month and there's a small chance he'll get eaten, and if we go with his, Hatim's brother is trying to talk him out of it since I'm 'not of the Book.'" Here she made a face. "You know, the one who thinks he should inherit instead of Nada. Arse. Anyway, neither of us has time for any of that, really, not the way things have been going in Damascus lately. We're doing wonderfully -- got this brilliant map that shows it all. Arithmantic methods, he says. Good solid barbarian meanness, says I." Here she grinned. "Anyway, Sheffield's got security pretty well covered and it'll be a lot of wards, so we probably won't be missed."
Godric had begun to wander off at this point, since he didn't want to stand around for a conversation he was clearly not part of, but at the name Sheffield, he turned around again.
"Who?" he asked.
"Aurelia Sheffield? My boss?" said Bergfalk, frowning. "Why? You trying to avoid her?"
She had made it! Maybe this party wouldn't be so awful after all. "You know, I don't think I was. D'you know where she is?"
"Last time I saw her she was out there somewhere," said Aurelia Bergfalk, waving vaguely towards the entrance to the Great Hall.
"Thanks," said Godric. He wandered out of the Great Hall, and saw Basil coming down the corridor leading the students. "Helga's angry with you."
"I told her I was going to be late. And we had staircase issues," Basil said.
"Her brother's here," Godric said by way of explanation.
"Oh god, no wonder," said Basil, cringing. "I'll see you at the feast, I hope." And like a doomed general he led his army of students into the Great Hall.
Godric walked out of the Hall, past Lord Slytherin, who stood talking in hushed tones to some men he didn't recognize. He heard voices in the Entrance Hall, and he paused to un-transfigure all of the garishification Rowena and Jasper had committed upon his person and his clothing. Nervously, he tried to get his hair to do something other than be messy, but for all he knew he was making it worse, so he just gave up and walked into the Entrance Hall.
She was speaking to two men. All three wore the same winged pig uniform, and as she spoke rapidly in Latin, she pointed to a parchment.
"Al-Aziz, I want you to go here first. If anyone not on the list tries to come in, I want your wards to immobilize them, and I want you to tie them to me so I know immediately. After you've set them up, inform me. Bogdanovich, you're going to be watching the guests inside the Great Hall. Keep a close eye on our known necromancers, and make sure ben Schlomo stays out of trouble, but don't kill anyone."
"What do you mean, Aurelia Sheffield? I kill someone? Me? You insult!" said the brown-haired man. "You insult very much, Aurelia, very much!"
"We all saw the bodies in Reykjavík, Bogdanovich," said the other, darker-skinned man. "They were extremely dead. Also in pieces. I could not sleep for weeks."
"Yes, well, let's let bygones be bygones for now," she said, "and do as I tell you."
"Where have you sent my... where have you sent Alfhild?" asked the dark man, who Godric assumed must be al-Aziz.
"She's inside, wanted to talk to Hufflepuff. Find her when you're done with the wards." She sounded rather annoyed, and Godric felt bad for her.
But finally the two other Aurae left, and he could see her clearly as she studied the parchment. She had cut her hair, and seemed to have learnt how to stand still for more than five seconds, but it was definitely her.
* * *
Rowena was having a good night so far. She had talked to people! It had not been about how untrustworthy she was! She had found herself mainly in the company of Ari Stigandrison, and they busied themselves making fun of everybody else. It was something Ari was uniquely suited for. "Aethelmaer Glendower's looking very ill, don't you think?"
"He's getting kicked off the Council, I heard," said Rowena, smugly.
"Really? Not old Aethie! But who will stand up for the rights of the noble necromancers now?" asked Ari.
She snorted. "Not me, that's for certain."
"Oh, that's right, you had that vampire thing happen," said Ari, shrugging it off more gracefully than she had. "You have the worst luck with men, you know. Speaking of which, who's that?" he asked, pointing at Lord de Malfoie, who was talking excitedly at Aurelius Bogdanovich.
"That," said Rowena, "is a married, extremely religious Muggle with two children. I assume the lady is his wife or something similar."
"So he's not your type, then," said Ari.
"Or yours, for that matter," she said. "But maybe we should rescue him from Bogdanovich."
"He did make quite a mess in Iceland," said Ari. "Father's contacts in the Althing were severely unimpressed. I think they were demanding severed limbs by way of payment. I mean, ones that they didn't get out of the deal already."
She blanched. "Would you excuse me? De Malfoie's got an army, and I'd hate if he got killed. I'll talk to you at dinner."
She walked over to the two of them. "Excuse me, I'm sorry to interrupt -- Aurelius Bogdanovich?"
"Ah! Lady Ravenclaw! Such a pleasure it is to meet you again! I shall kiss your hand," said Bogdanovich.
"Actually," said Rowena, removing her hand from his grasp quickly, "I was wondering if you could check on my mother for me? I don't want her to get lost; it's such a big castle, you see, and you know, a lady is prone to being overwhelmed when her sense of direction is tested."
"Oh, yes, yes. Anything for the lady! I will find her and bring her here, in no more time than it takes for the thestral to climb into the sky!" And with that, he left.
"He's quite mad," she told Lord de Malfoie once he was out of earshot. "But you know how it is, one of those people we had to invite."
"Ooh, I know how that is," said Lady de Malfoie. "Remember your cousins?" she demanded. "Remember last Easter?"
"Let's not talk about last Easter, it gives me a headache," said Lord de Malfoie.
"He has the most dreadful cousins," she said, gleefully.
"This is Lady Ravenclaw, Aveline. She's a witch. I'm sure she's got far more interesting things than to talk about my stupid cousins."
"You know, I think I know what sort of cousins you mean," said Rowena. "Did they stay for months and months and months, eating you out of house and home, and complain about everything?"
"Exactly!" said Lady de Malfoie.
"I'm going to go find Julian," said Lord de Malfoie, looking disgruntled.
"Oh dear. I hope I haven't offended him," said Rowena. "He isn't that sort of guest at all."
"Oh, he's always grumpy like that," she said. "He's not a night person."
They had a long conversation about cousins who never left, and a polite argument about what to do with rude servants. Rowena had always considered Muggles a bit barbaric for using humans instead of house-elves. A house-elf you could punish corporeally and not worry, but humans could think, so the usual punishments would just justify whatever ill-feeling they held towards their masters. (And she thought it seemed a little cruel, but she decided not to mention that.)
She left when Basil brought in the students, and Lord de Malfoie came back with Julian in tow. And then she realized what had been bothering her all through the discussion of servants. The room was distinctly missing its twelve-foot-six baffled Transfigurator. Who was pretty much an essential, if she was going to pass the whole thing off as a fundraising and publicity stunt.
When she ran into Helga, she said "Where's Godric?"
"Gone to talk to Sheffield," said Helga, shrugging. "Probably wants to talk theory or -- oh! That reminds me! Hatim and Alfhild are off planning their escape, since after the feast they're sneaking off to get married. But for all official intents and purposes, Jasper's showing them wards or something."
"Is Jasper in on it, or is he going to turn up and loudly ask where they are while I'm making excuses for them?" Rowena asked.
"I don't know, I just heard this from Basil," said Helga. "Who, incidentally, is lucky to be alive, so if you run into him and he's not forthcoming, threaten him with me."
"All right," said Rowena.
"And my brother's here," she added, glaring. "He brought some girl called Mary with him, but I had the Aurae kick her out. Who invited my brother?"
"I've no idea," said Rowena. "You know I hate him."
"He's going to ask you for money," said Helga.
"I'll tell him I haven't got enough for me," she said. "It's the gods' honest truth! Anyway, I have to go find Godric and possibly hit him. Although maybe I should be merciful, considering. ...are you certain he wants to talk theory with Sheffield?"
Helga shrugged. "Apparently he knows her."
"Huh. Maybe he's thinking of someone else," said Rowena. "You know how bad he is with names. I suppose I'd better go save him." She turned to look around for Aurae, but almost immediately ended up face to face with Helga's brother Leo. He smiled winningly. "Rowena! How are you?"
There was no denying it. He was still absolutely ridiculously good-looking, and it was just not fair. Rowena had to reconsider her initial decision to simply tell him off. He was far too pretty.
She decided to terrify him instead.
"Oh! Leo! I haven't seen you for so long!" she said. "I'm so glad I ran into you!" She hugged him.
He seemed encouraged. "Yeah, me too. Listen, I was wondering if you'd do a favor for an old friend."
"What a coincidence! Because, you know, I was just wondering the same thing," she said. She put an arm around his shoulder. "How would you like to make a great deal of money, Leo?"
He looked pleasantly surprised. "How?"
"Let me preface this, Leo, with a heartfelt statement," she said. "I like you. You're so independent! And you don't give up! I feel we're kindred spirits, really."
"Really?"
"Really," she said, putting her other hand over her heart. "And I have chosen you for this little scheme of mine, Leo, because I feel you deserve it. You deserve the recognition, and the praise --"
"And the money?"
"And the money," she said, glad he had his priorities in order. "Doubtless you have a wonderful business plan. And I'm willing to split it with you fifty-fifty."
"But I thought --"
"But it's, as I mentioned, a great deal of money, so you've nothing to worry about. You'll want for nothing for the rest of your life," she said.
"What do I need to do?" he asked. That baffled expression on his lovely face was simply glorious. She grinned.
"Marry me," she said. He looked shocked, and before he could get out another word, she continued. "I know what you're thinking! You're thinking, 'What on earth is she on about?' You're thinking 'How will this be of any profit to anyone?' Well, let me tell you. My poor dear husband, may Hades care for his shade, saw fit to lock up all the money until I remarried. Now, you'd think a charming lady such as myself would be able to find a husband relatively quickly, but alas! They all seem to think that I murdered him! Murdered! In cold blood! Me! Can you imagine what such people must think of me?"
"Er," said Leo, who looked to be imagining very well. She was impressed. She usually had to do all the work for him.
"And so they have spread vicious rumors and lies! Oh, these are horrible people, Leo. I pray every day to Hermes that wonderful people like you may never know the sting of meeting those people. It's dreadful! They won't rest until they've ruined a lady's reputation beyond repair! They may smile, and laugh, but their evil knows no bounds! Why, that rumor about having an army of Inferi with him at the lead, I have no idea where that one came from. Do you?"
"Well," said Leo, who looked as though he might want to get a word in edgewise. Or maybe flee. It was hard to tell, with Leo.
"No! Of course not!" she continued, ignoring him. "Because you know me better than that. And why I should need a Horcrux, well, I just don't know. I mean, if I was going to make a Horcrux, I would certainly kill someone less important than my own husband. Wouldn't you think that's the most sensible route?"
"I suppose." Leo was looking deeply uncomfortable by now. She could almost see the connections forming in his tiny mind. Wait a moment, he was thinking. I'm not that important. What if she kills me? What if she kills me right now?
"I'm so glad you understand me, Leo," she said, winding the arm around his shoulder tighter. "I feel like we're at the top of a cliff, Leo, you and I, at the top of a cliff, looking down at the magnificent vista of the future that lies before us! And all we need is a little push before we can just fly." She emphasized this with a hearty pat on the back.
"Er. Well. I'd be glad to help you out," said Leo, hesitantly. "But."
"But?" She affected disappointment.
"But I don't really think, er, Ethelinda would understand," said Leo.
"...Ethelinda?" Rowena asked blankly.
"Ethelinda! My girl."
"Helga said your girl was called Mary."
"Ethelinda Mary," said Leo quickly. "Sometimes she goes by her middle name. Anyway--"
"Where is she, anyway?"
"She couldn't come," said Leo. "Very sick. Pox."
"Well, I'm sure if you explained to her --"
"She gets very jealous," said Leo. "Poor dear. Very jealous. Listen, it was wonderful seeing you again, but I have to go, er. Meet with someone."
"If you ever want to reconsider, I'll be here!" she shouted after him. And he was gone. Satisfied with a job well done, Rowena walked out into the corridor to laugh maniacally.
Spotting Lord Salazar talking to her father and someone she didn't recognize, she decided she'd better save it for later, and worry about business now. She walked over to ask if he'd seen Godric.
Her father was speaking, she realized, in a whisper. "...not my fault she --" And as soon as he saw her, he fell silent. Lord Salazar and the other man turned and looked at her, as if waiting for her to go away.
"I thought you were supposed to be going deaf," she said flatly, and without bothering to raise her voice.
Lord Salazar cleared his throat. "What did you want?"
"I wanted to know if you'd seen Godric, but since I haven't been invited into your fabulous wrinkly-old-man treehouse with the 'no girls' sign, I suppose I can just go look for him myself."
"Rowena!" said her father. "Don't be petulant."
"I'm not being petulant! This is a natural reaction to being deemed untrustworthy by default! You didn't even deign to have a normal conversation with me all through your last visit," she snapped at her father. Then she turned to Lord Salazar. "And you think I'm going to go haring off to sabotage the school I came up with because I'm, I don't know, mad, and I just can't resist doing nasty things. And you," she snarled, turning to the third man, "who in Hades are you and what are you going to accuse me of?"
He raised an eyebrow. "You sure you want to keep her around, Salazar? She seems a bit mad. And probably untrustworthy." He smirked.
"Why do you think I keep you around, then?" Lord Salazar asked him mildly. "Lady Ravenclaw, may I introduce you to Ximon Etxazarra? He's on the Wizards' Council."
"I apologize for my semblance of madness, Lord Etxazarra," she said stiffly. "But would somebody please explain what's going on here?"
"Dealing with a situation, same as we always do," said Etxazarra. "And I'm not a lord."
"It concerns Gualterus," said Lord Salazar. "I think she should know." He looked significantly at Rowena's father.
He cringed. "'Wena --"
"DAD! Don't call me that!"
"-- it's about your mother."
"If she's trying to marry me off again without my knowledge, I'm going to be very upset," said Rowena, "but what does it have to do with anything?"
He sighed. "I've been pretending the hearing potions don't work so she won't go elsewhere to talk to her lackeys, and I don't think you have much to worry about, 'Wena."
"I said --"
"I think," he continued, "she's planning on killing me off so she can keep Fudge under better control."
Rowena stopped obsessing over the first syllable of her name. "...no," she said quietly. "No, she can't."
"See," said Etxazarra, "this is what happens when you marry a murderous political climber, Gualt, you can't --"
"YOU SHUT UP," shouted Rowena, drawing her wand, and pointing it at his face. "You shut up. Just shut up, and don't smirk, and... and..." In a sudden moment of overlucidity, she realized that she was threatening a member of the Wizards' Council, a crime for which she could be sent to Drear. A crime which would do very little for her father. With great effort, she withdrew her wand and let her hand drop.
"I told you, I didn't want to upset her," her father was saying. She felt like he was in a different room, in a different country, talking about somebody else.
"She had to know sooner or later," said Lord Slytherin.
"She's very sensitive --"
"Oversensitive," said Etxazarra.
"No," said Rowena. "I won't let her." Drear was bloody well worth it. She turned, clutching her wand like a dagger, and started stalking back towards the Great Hall. Plan be damned. Feast be damned. Mum be damned.
"Lady Ravenclaw, where are you --"
"Rowena! Don't --"
"Remigro!" snapped Etxazarra, and Rowena was jerked back in front of the three. Etxazarra snatched her wand as she started to hex him. "Are you mad, or stupid?" he demanded.
"Give it back," she snarled at him, and tried to take another step -- but she was stuck fast. "Let me go! I'll --"
"She's got the Aurae, Rowena. You'll be killed," said her father.
"I have precedent! I have -- Athena said -- but she can't!"
"Why not?" asked Etxazarra.
"Ximon, don't agitate her," said Lord Salazar.
"You taught me to read," she said to her father, blinking back tears. "You taught me to read, she can't do that. I won't let her."
"Definitely mad," said Etxazarra. "Did it perhaps occur to you that this isn't an urgent situation?"
"We're working on ways to keep her from moving too soon," said Salazar.
"Oh, too soon! What's enough time, then?" Rowena demanded. "What's enough time, tell me, for my father to live? Are we talking years here, or have you decided that he's had enough time if he survives another month? Are you just deciding this by yourself, or are you in consultation with your sister Atropos, or --"
"My sister was murdered," said Lord Salazar harshly.
"...I. Er. I forgot that you had a sister," she said uneasily. "I'm. Sorry? Really. Only I thought she'd died normally."
Something about her surprise softened his expression. "You couldn't have known," he said. "Actually, you remind me a bit of her. Very idealistic. Hated everybody. Wrote terrible poetry."
"I'm not idealistic!" said Rowena. She tried to stop sniffling, and failed. "...and my poetry's not that bad," she added half-heartedly. She had never told anybody but Ari about the poetry. Not even Helga. "What's, er. What's your solution?"
"We don't know yet," said Etxazarra.
"But I'll tell you when we've worked something out," said Lord Salazar. "Meanwhile, I have something that may help prepared for the feast."
"You'll tell me really, or you'll just tell me roundaboutly, or you'll just tell someone else and assume they'll tell me, because you want me to react in a certain way?" Rowena demanded.
"I'll tell you really," said Lord Salazar.
"What's at the feast, then?" she asked.
"You'll know it when you see it," said Lord Salazar.
She sighed. "This had all better work," she told him.
"It will," he said. And she nearly believed him. "Master Gryffindor, incidentally, went that way," he said, pointing towards the Entrance Hall."
"Thanks," she said. "I'm going to kill him. ...not really," she added quickly, just in case anyone should have any doubts. Retrieving her wand and unsticking her feet, she dried her eyes and departed in search of Godric.
Author's Notes: The gen zine I mentioned last chapter will probably be called The Hogwarts Express, and is still recruiting. If you're at all interested, go to norisis' journal and comment!
Rowena's reference to Athena here is not just random -- she's referring to the part of The Eumenides where Athena, acting as judge, rules that Orestes, having killed his mother in revenge because she killed his father, does not deserve to be punished by the Furies, because fathers are more important as parents than mothers. This blanket generalization seems pretty bizarre nowadays, but if anyone would cite Greek tragedy as legal precedent at times of great emotional distress, you just know it would be Rowena.
Chapter 15