Tainted Purity - Chapter 7
Title: Tainted Purity
Author: Tankyasue
Warning: Shounen-ai. Lime in later chapters.
Disclaimer: I don't own Tokyo Babylon, Clamp does.
Summary: Subaru discovers who Seishirou really is before the end of the bet.
Chapter 7 - Solid Gold
The beverage-probably intended to be sweet-tasted bitter on his tongue, but somehow he’d managed to force it down anyway.
“The food here is really delicious, isn’t it Subaru-kun? You should try a piece of my chocolate chip muffin. I know you’ll love it!” the man sitting across from him exclaimed cheerfully. Without even waiting for a response, he tore off a piece of his muffin and held it in front of Subaru’s face.
Subaru only shook his head, refusing the food that the man had offered him. He still wasn’t sure why the Sakurazukamori did things like this in public, and right now he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to know. Still, it was pretty pathetic that he still couldn’t figure out what it was that motivated him to do most of the things that he did, even after spending so much time with the man. Hokuto was right, he really was an airhead.
Subaru stiffened when the Sakurazukamori began to caress his face and hair. It was something that he did fairly often, so he should have gotten used to it by now. It wasn’t like the Sakurazukamori meant anything behind his actions anyway. To him, touching him like this was probably just like petting a dog.
“Is something bothering you, Subaru-kun?” the man asked softly.
Subaru didn’t reply, but his cheeks turned bright red.
“You know, you’re really adorable… it’s so easy to embarrass you. But, you would probably feel more comfortable if we went somewhere more private on Saturday.”
“I’m sorry Seishirou-san, but I’m busy on Saturday…” Subaru mumbled just loudly enough to be heard.
The man chuckled softly in response, and continued to pet him.
“I suppose that can’t be helped considering your work. I guess I was just being hopeful because you’ve had so much free time recently, but I suppose good things can’t last forever.”
Subaru had been turning down several smaller jobs and postponing many larger ones recently in order to spend more time with the Sakurazukamori, so it wasn’t surprising that the man wasn’t as accommodating towards his schedule as he had been in the past. Now, he seemed to expect him to drop everything to be with him.
“I’m really, really sorry Seishirou-san. You know that I’d spend more time with you if I could, but I received a phone call from my grandmother last night. She insisted upon seeing me during the weekend. She sounded very upset on the phone, and I can’t afford to make her any angrier than I already have. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. This is my fault isn’t it? You’ve been turning down work to spend more time with me. You are far too kind my Subaru-kun… putting up with an old man like me. It must be very boring for you.”
“That isn’t true! I enjoy spending time with you! I really do! I promise that the moment I get back from Kyoto, we can do whatever you want!” Subaru exclaimed shrilly. He couldn’t let the Sakurazukamori think that he didn’t like him.
“Really?”
“Of course!”
The Sakurazukamori inched towards him and planted a chaste kiss on his lips. Subaru froze as usual, not knowing how to react.
The man pulled away from him a second later. His kisses never lasted very long. Never more than just a brief brushing of the lips that could hardly even be called a kiss at all, and yet they still made him so uncomfortable. He always got the feeling that Seishirou wanted more from him than this, but he wasn’t sure that he could give him what he wanted. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to either.
Subaru immediately began to feel guilty for thinking this the moment that he saw the expression on Seishirou’s face. He was smiling-he was always smiling-but his smiles didn’t reach his eyes any more. Perhaps Seishirou really wanted to see if he could love him-maybe that’s why he made the bet with him in the first place, and he was the one keeping him from learning to love because he never returned his affections.
Subaru’s face began to feel hot. When had he become such a pervert?
Seishirou’s laughter certainly didn’t make him feel any better.
Subaru entered the dimly lit tearoom silently without bothering to so much as glance at his surroundings before kneeling on the tatami mat placed in front of his grandmother. He didn’t have to look up at her to see her disapproving glare. He remembered it clearly enough from the last time that he’d seen her.
“I’m glad to see that you came since you seem to be ignoring all of your other duties as of late,” Lady Sumeragi began sardonically as she prepared the tea.
Subaru remained silent as he watched the former Sumeragi head swish the chasen in the chawan. The tea ceremony was a familiar ritual that brought him a sense of boredom accompanied by an almost soothing sense of normalcy. Unfortunately, this sensation didn’t last long.
“Subaru-san, why can’t you look at me when I’m talking to you? It’s very rude… and very unlike you. You’re usually such a polite boy.”
Though he never would have admitted it before, not even to himself, he found the way that his grandmother spoke to him aggravating. She would elevate him in one breath, only to needlessly remind him of the pressure forced upon him because of his powers and his position, and in the next she would deflate him by dismissing him as ‘just a child’. It seemed that this time she’d decided to skip the first part just so she could have more time to take pleasure in scolding him. However, it was still rude to deliberately ignore her.
Subaru lifted his face and forced himself to look into his grandmother’s eyes. For some reason, he’d expected her eyes to be cold and vacant like the Sakurazukamori’s, but instead found himself looking into the eyes of a concerned human being. He wanted to lower his eyes to escape them, but she would have interpreted it as rudeness.
“Something’s happened, hasn’t it? You’ve changed since the last time that I saw you.”
“I-I’m sorry Grandmother…” he mumbled almost too softly to be heard. He could feel tears threatening to pour down his cheeks but he refused to let them fall.
His grandmother offered no reply as she finished preparing the tea. This time, he didn’t watch her.
“Is everything alright?” she asked finally. Her voice sounded different than it usually did. It was almost human.
Subaru said nothing. He couldn’t tell her that everything was fine, but he couldn’t get her involved in the Sakurazukamori’s games either. If she knew about the things he’d done with the man… even if she knew of his reasons she would never be able to forgive him.
“Your gloves, Subaru-san, you haven’t taken off your gloves have you?”
It was not an unusual question, one she asked him every time he visited her. Before, it had been an extremely simple question to answer, but now it caused a familiar pain to rise in his chest.
Subaru really didn’t want to lie to his grandmother, but she would be devastated if she discovered the truth. Or perhaps she would be enraged that her grandson had dishonoured her family.
“No, of course not,” he lied, subconsciously lowering his gaze.
He realized that his grandmother didn’t believe him the moment he’d found the courage to look up at her again.
“Um… P-Please excuse me, Grandmother. I really need to get going. Goodbye,” he said quickly before dashing out of the room without giving her a chance to reply. He knew that it was stupid and it was rude for him to leave so suddenly, but he didn’t care. He just couldn’t stand being near her any more.
It was odd to find himself enclosed in the familiar black void with only vague memories of staring vacantly outside of the train window earlier, but it was even stranger to see the familiar, fragile figure kneeling calmly before him.
Kuzuki sat much closer to him than he usually did, barely half a foot away. Subaru wanted to shift away a little, but he remained where he was.
“What exactly do you think you’re doing,” Kuzuki murmured softly. Subaru noticed that his fists where clenched uncharacteristically in his lap, but chose not to comment on it. “Why are you going out on dates with him?”
“I-I just… want to keep the Sakurazukamori away from Hokuto-chan,” he whispered without looking him.
“Wouldn’t it be better to kill him? He can’t harm your sister if he’s dead,” the man countered in the same condescending tone that his grandmother often used whenever he’d done something that she disapproved of.
Subaru remained silent. He didn’t understand why this person seemed to think that killing the Sakurazukamori would be so simple. The man was very powerful-probably a lot more powerful than he was. He didn’t think that he could defeat him if he tried. Besides, there had to be a better way…
Finally he answered, “I’m sorry… I can’t…” Subaru winced at the weakness of his own voice.
“That’s because you’re in love with him… isn’t that right ‘Subaru-kun’. You enjoy being near him,” Kuzuki said his name in a perfect mimicry of the Sakurazukamori’s tone. “You enjoy it when he kisses you… touches you… you want him to do more. Isn’t that the reason why you keep coming back to him?”
“That’s not true. I’m not in love with him.”
“It was stupid for me to think that I could change anything. I thought that if you saw what kind of person the Sakurazukamori was you would stand up to him like you did for that puppy in the park, but I guess Hokuto isn’t worth that much to you.”
“That’s not true!” Subaru cried. He forced himself to stare into Kuzuki’s eyes for the first time during the conversation, only to discover that they were full of tears. Regardless, he continued, “I love Hokuto-chan more than anyone else!”
Kuzuki was silent. Disbelieving.
“I-I may not hate the Sakurazukamori enough to kill him, but that doesn’t mean that I’m in love with him either. I just… I pity him because he can’t care about anyone other than himself. I think that he might want to-that could be the reason why he’d made the bet with me-because he’s lonely… At least, I always thought that he looked lonely when I saw him in my dreams. Maybe he wants to love someone, but he just doesn’t know how. If I can show him how to care both Hokuto-chan and Seishirou-san will be happy. Hokuto-chan wants me to be with him, and I don’t want to upset her…”
“I see…” Kuzuki murmured more to himself than to Subaru. “You really are a very kind person… just like Hokuto said. Still, that doesn’t mean that there might not be another reason why you’ve chosen this path, Sumeragi-san. Something that you may not even be aware of yourself.
“I suppose you really were meant to be with him and even knowing won’t change that… just promise me that you won’t let him kill Hokuto.”
“Don’t worry, Kuzuki-san. I’ll kill the Sakurazukamori before letting Hokuto-chan die.”
There was something alien about the girl’s smile. It seemed far too wide, even for a naturally cheery person like Hokuto. In some ways, it might have been less unsettling to find her weeping on Subaru’s bed again, instead of standing in front of him wearing a strange outfit that he supposed was intended to resemble a flower with yellow petals for a skirt. It was outwardly cheery, like her smile, but that cheeriness hid something…
Then again, did it really matter?
The girl sat down on the comfy floor cushion beside him, placing a tray filled with sweets between them. All the while, her smile didn’t fade.
“It’s surprising to see that you’re not with Subaru. The two of you have spent so much time together recently. You must be lonely without him to keep you company.”
“Yes, I miss him already,” Seishirou sighed dramatically taking a bite from the cupcake that he’d taken from the tray. “Mmm… this is delicious, Hokuto-chan, but it can’t compare to your own.”
“Well, I haven’t felt like baking lately…” she replied far too softly. It was surprising to discover just how easy it had been to make her cheery grin shatter.
“Sei-chan, have you… done anything to my brother?”
“What do you mean by that Hokuto-chan? Is something wrong,” Seishirou answered in a perfect mimicry of concern. He wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulder to add to the illusion. Predictably, she leaned into his embrace.
But there was something wrong about her reaction…
Subaru never leaned into his touches like this. Whenever he touched him, Subaru would just remain still and allow him to do whatever he wanted. But, Subaru was very shy so he probably just didn’t know how to respond to his lover’s affection. It wasn’t like he was rejecting him.
However, it still wasn’t right. Subaru belonged to him. He had no right to ignore him.
“Subaru is starting to change. Most of the time, it feels like he’s gone somewhere far away from me… someplace where I can’t reach him,” the girl murmured in a soft tone that made her seem fragile. “He rarely speaks to me anymore, and he flatly refuses to wear any of the clothes that I make for him. You’ve probably noticed that already…”
Of course he had noticed Subaru’s drastic new wardrobe filled with greys, blacks, and blues in place of the rainbow of colours that he used to wear. Simple turtlenecks replaced elaborate jackets, and the ‘hats’ had completely vanished. However, unlike Hokuto, Seishirou was completely indifferent to this change. Subaru looked marvellous in anything that he wore, and recently he was more concerned about the things that were hidden underneath his lover’s clothing than what clothes he chose to wear.
“… but other times he’s so clingy it’s unnerving. It’s like he thinks I’m going to leave him,” Hokuto-chan continued ranting taking no notice of his disinterest in the conversation. Still, he had to pretend, didn’t he?
“Do you blame me for this, Hokuto-chan? Subaru-kun is the vision of morality. Perhaps it’s wrong for me to seduce him, no matter my feelings.”
“I don’t care about that! I just want him to be happy,” Hokuto retorted, pulling away from him slightly and closing into herself.
A weak knocking at the door interrupted whatever reassuring words he would have provided the girl. Hokuto stood up abruptly and ran to the door, seeming to forget that he was sitting right beside her.
Subaru entered the apartment looking tired and dishevelled, but no less beautiful than he did at any other time. Perhaps the boy would look like that after they made love for the first time.
“Hokuto-chan!” the boy cried out a little too happily for his liking before he threw his arms around his sister and embraced her in a warm hug. When his sister wrapped her arms around his shoulders, Subaru moved in even closer to her. His face showed an expression of pure bliss.
He never wore such an expression during their time together.
“Hello Subaru,” Hokuto replied for once sounding slightly less enthusiastic than her brother. “You’re back earlier than I expected.”
“I-I might have done the job a little too quickly but… I just really wanted to see you.”
“Hello, Subaru-kun! I’m glad to see that you’re back,” Seishriou cried out startling the boy. He was pleased when he reverted back to his usual self and pulled away from his sister.
Subaru looked at Seishirou with a bewildered expression as if he could not fathom what exactly he was doing there. “S-Seishirou-san! Erm… I’m sorry. I didn’t know that you were here…”
“I noticed…” he replied walking towards the boy a little too quickly. Subaru’s eyes widened and he took a step back.
Seishirou wrapped his arms around the boy’s waist, and pressed him gently against his chest, successfully trapping him with his body. The boy hesitantly wrapped his arms around him in return, but the action lacked enthusiasm.
“Subaru-kun, didn’t you miss me while you were gone?” Seishirou asked. He wasn’t aware that he sounded like a child begging for attention.
“O-Of course…”
“You remember your promise, don’t you?”
“Of course I do, Seishirou-san,” Subaru answered more confidently. His thin arms tightened around him. “I promised I would spend time with you after I got back from Kyoto.”
“But, isn’t it a little late for that,” Hokuto protested sternly.
“How would you like to come to my apartment tonight, Subaru-kun? I told you that my bed is very comfortable, didn’t I?”
Subaru nodded.
Seishriou wasn’t sure if he was confirming that he remembered him saying that or if he was agreeing to come with him, but he didn’t care. He led the boy out of the apartment, ignoring the nearly hysteric girl shouting after them.
Definitions:
Chawa - Tea Bowl
Chasen - Bamboo Whisk
Author: Tankyasue
Warning: Shounen-ai. Lime in later chapters.
Disclaimer: I don't own Tokyo Babylon, Clamp does.
Summary: Subaru discovers who Seishirou really is before the end of the bet.
Chapter 7 - Solid Gold
The beverage-probably intended to be sweet-tasted bitter on his tongue, but somehow he’d managed to force it down anyway.
“The food here is really delicious, isn’t it Subaru-kun? You should try a piece of my chocolate chip muffin. I know you’ll love it!” the man sitting across from him exclaimed cheerfully. Without even waiting for a response, he tore off a piece of his muffin and held it in front of Subaru’s face.
Subaru only shook his head, refusing the food that the man had offered him. He still wasn’t sure why the Sakurazukamori did things like this in public, and right now he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to know. Still, it was pretty pathetic that he still couldn’t figure out what it was that motivated him to do most of the things that he did, even after spending so much time with the man. Hokuto was right, he really was an airhead.
Subaru stiffened when the Sakurazukamori began to caress his face and hair. It was something that he did fairly often, so he should have gotten used to it by now. It wasn’t like the Sakurazukamori meant anything behind his actions anyway. To him, touching him like this was probably just like petting a dog.
“Is something bothering you, Subaru-kun?” the man asked softly.
Subaru didn’t reply, but his cheeks turned bright red.
“You know, you’re really adorable… it’s so easy to embarrass you. But, you would probably feel more comfortable if we went somewhere more private on Saturday.”
“I’m sorry Seishirou-san, but I’m busy on Saturday…” Subaru mumbled just loudly enough to be heard.
The man chuckled softly in response, and continued to pet him.
“I suppose that can’t be helped considering your work. I guess I was just being hopeful because you’ve had so much free time recently, but I suppose good things can’t last forever.”
Subaru had been turning down several smaller jobs and postponing many larger ones recently in order to spend more time with the Sakurazukamori, so it wasn’t surprising that the man wasn’t as accommodating towards his schedule as he had been in the past. Now, he seemed to expect him to drop everything to be with him.
“I’m really, really sorry Seishirou-san. You know that I’d spend more time with you if I could, but I received a phone call from my grandmother last night. She insisted upon seeing me during the weekend. She sounded very upset on the phone, and I can’t afford to make her any angrier than I already have. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. This is my fault isn’t it? You’ve been turning down work to spend more time with me. You are far too kind my Subaru-kun… putting up with an old man like me. It must be very boring for you.”
“That isn’t true! I enjoy spending time with you! I really do! I promise that the moment I get back from Kyoto, we can do whatever you want!” Subaru exclaimed shrilly. He couldn’t let the Sakurazukamori think that he didn’t like him.
“Really?”
“Of course!”
The Sakurazukamori inched towards him and planted a chaste kiss on his lips. Subaru froze as usual, not knowing how to react.
The man pulled away from him a second later. His kisses never lasted very long. Never more than just a brief brushing of the lips that could hardly even be called a kiss at all, and yet they still made him so uncomfortable. He always got the feeling that Seishirou wanted more from him than this, but he wasn’t sure that he could give him what he wanted. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to either.
Subaru immediately began to feel guilty for thinking this the moment that he saw the expression on Seishirou’s face. He was smiling-he was always smiling-but his smiles didn’t reach his eyes any more. Perhaps Seishirou really wanted to see if he could love him-maybe that’s why he made the bet with him in the first place, and he was the one keeping him from learning to love because he never returned his affections.
Subaru’s face began to feel hot. When had he become such a pervert?
Seishirou’s laughter certainly didn’t make him feel any better.
Subaru entered the dimly lit tearoom silently without bothering to so much as glance at his surroundings before kneeling on the tatami mat placed in front of his grandmother. He didn’t have to look up at her to see her disapproving glare. He remembered it clearly enough from the last time that he’d seen her.
“I’m glad to see that you came since you seem to be ignoring all of your other duties as of late,” Lady Sumeragi began sardonically as she prepared the tea.
Subaru remained silent as he watched the former Sumeragi head swish the chasen in the chawan. The tea ceremony was a familiar ritual that brought him a sense of boredom accompanied by an almost soothing sense of normalcy. Unfortunately, this sensation didn’t last long.
“Subaru-san, why can’t you look at me when I’m talking to you? It’s very rude… and very unlike you. You’re usually such a polite boy.”
Though he never would have admitted it before, not even to himself, he found the way that his grandmother spoke to him aggravating. She would elevate him in one breath, only to needlessly remind him of the pressure forced upon him because of his powers and his position, and in the next she would deflate him by dismissing him as ‘just a child’. It seemed that this time she’d decided to skip the first part just so she could have more time to take pleasure in scolding him. However, it was still rude to deliberately ignore her.
Subaru lifted his face and forced himself to look into his grandmother’s eyes. For some reason, he’d expected her eyes to be cold and vacant like the Sakurazukamori’s, but instead found himself looking into the eyes of a concerned human being. He wanted to lower his eyes to escape them, but she would have interpreted it as rudeness.
“Something’s happened, hasn’t it? You’ve changed since the last time that I saw you.”
“I-I’m sorry Grandmother…” he mumbled almost too softly to be heard. He could feel tears threatening to pour down his cheeks but he refused to let them fall.
His grandmother offered no reply as she finished preparing the tea. This time, he didn’t watch her.
“Is everything alright?” she asked finally. Her voice sounded different than it usually did. It was almost human.
Subaru said nothing. He couldn’t tell her that everything was fine, but he couldn’t get her involved in the Sakurazukamori’s games either. If she knew about the things he’d done with the man… even if she knew of his reasons she would never be able to forgive him.
“Your gloves, Subaru-san, you haven’t taken off your gloves have you?”
It was not an unusual question, one she asked him every time he visited her. Before, it had been an extremely simple question to answer, but now it caused a familiar pain to rise in his chest.
Subaru really didn’t want to lie to his grandmother, but she would be devastated if she discovered the truth. Or perhaps she would be enraged that her grandson had dishonoured her family.
“No, of course not,” he lied, subconsciously lowering his gaze.
He realized that his grandmother didn’t believe him the moment he’d found the courage to look up at her again.
“Um… P-Please excuse me, Grandmother. I really need to get going. Goodbye,” he said quickly before dashing out of the room without giving her a chance to reply. He knew that it was stupid and it was rude for him to leave so suddenly, but he didn’t care. He just couldn’t stand being near her any more.
It was odd to find himself enclosed in the familiar black void with only vague memories of staring vacantly outside of the train window earlier, but it was even stranger to see the familiar, fragile figure kneeling calmly before him.
Kuzuki sat much closer to him than he usually did, barely half a foot away. Subaru wanted to shift away a little, but he remained where he was.
“What exactly do you think you’re doing,” Kuzuki murmured softly. Subaru noticed that his fists where clenched uncharacteristically in his lap, but chose not to comment on it. “Why are you going out on dates with him?”
“I-I just… want to keep the Sakurazukamori away from Hokuto-chan,” he whispered without looking him.
“Wouldn’t it be better to kill him? He can’t harm your sister if he’s dead,” the man countered in the same condescending tone that his grandmother often used whenever he’d done something that she disapproved of.
Subaru remained silent. He didn’t understand why this person seemed to think that killing the Sakurazukamori would be so simple. The man was very powerful-probably a lot more powerful than he was. He didn’t think that he could defeat him if he tried. Besides, there had to be a better way…
Finally he answered, “I’m sorry… I can’t…” Subaru winced at the weakness of his own voice.
“That’s because you’re in love with him… isn’t that right ‘Subaru-kun’. You enjoy being near him,” Kuzuki said his name in a perfect mimicry of the Sakurazukamori’s tone. “You enjoy it when he kisses you… touches you… you want him to do more. Isn’t that the reason why you keep coming back to him?”
“That’s not true. I’m not in love with him.”
“It was stupid for me to think that I could change anything. I thought that if you saw what kind of person the Sakurazukamori was you would stand up to him like you did for that puppy in the park, but I guess Hokuto isn’t worth that much to you.”
“That’s not true!” Subaru cried. He forced himself to stare into Kuzuki’s eyes for the first time during the conversation, only to discover that they were full of tears. Regardless, he continued, “I love Hokuto-chan more than anyone else!”
Kuzuki was silent. Disbelieving.
“I-I may not hate the Sakurazukamori enough to kill him, but that doesn’t mean that I’m in love with him either. I just… I pity him because he can’t care about anyone other than himself. I think that he might want to-that could be the reason why he’d made the bet with me-because he’s lonely… At least, I always thought that he looked lonely when I saw him in my dreams. Maybe he wants to love someone, but he just doesn’t know how. If I can show him how to care both Hokuto-chan and Seishirou-san will be happy. Hokuto-chan wants me to be with him, and I don’t want to upset her…”
“I see…” Kuzuki murmured more to himself than to Subaru. “You really are a very kind person… just like Hokuto said. Still, that doesn’t mean that there might not be another reason why you’ve chosen this path, Sumeragi-san. Something that you may not even be aware of yourself.
“I suppose you really were meant to be with him and even knowing won’t change that… just promise me that you won’t let him kill Hokuto.”
“Don’t worry, Kuzuki-san. I’ll kill the Sakurazukamori before letting Hokuto-chan die.”
There was something alien about the girl’s smile. It seemed far too wide, even for a naturally cheery person like Hokuto. In some ways, it might have been less unsettling to find her weeping on Subaru’s bed again, instead of standing in front of him wearing a strange outfit that he supposed was intended to resemble a flower with yellow petals for a skirt. It was outwardly cheery, like her smile, but that cheeriness hid something…
Then again, did it really matter?
The girl sat down on the comfy floor cushion beside him, placing a tray filled with sweets between them. All the while, her smile didn’t fade.
“It’s surprising to see that you’re not with Subaru. The two of you have spent so much time together recently. You must be lonely without him to keep you company.”
“Yes, I miss him already,” Seishirou sighed dramatically taking a bite from the cupcake that he’d taken from the tray. “Mmm… this is delicious, Hokuto-chan, but it can’t compare to your own.”
“Well, I haven’t felt like baking lately…” she replied far too softly. It was surprising to discover just how easy it had been to make her cheery grin shatter.
“Sei-chan, have you… done anything to my brother?”
“What do you mean by that Hokuto-chan? Is something wrong,” Seishirou answered in a perfect mimicry of concern. He wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulder to add to the illusion. Predictably, she leaned into his embrace.
But there was something wrong about her reaction…
Subaru never leaned into his touches like this. Whenever he touched him, Subaru would just remain still and allow him to do whatever he wanted. But, Subaru was very shy so he probably just didn’t know how to respond to his lover’s affection. It wasn’t like he was rejecting him.
However, it still wasn’t right. Subaru belonged to him. He had no right to ignore him.
“Subaru is starting to change. Most of the time, it feels like he’s gone somewhere far away from me… someplace where I can’t reach him,” the girl murmured in a soft tone that made her seem fragile. “He rarely speaks to me anymore, and he flatly refuses to wear any of the clothes that I make for him. You’ve probably noticed that already…”
Of course he had noticed Subaru’s drastic new wardrobe filled with greys, blacks, and blues in place of the rainbow of colours that he used to wear. Simple turtlenecks replaced elaborate jackets, and the ‘hats’ had completely vanished. However, unlike Hokuto, Seishirou was completely indifferent to this change. Subaru looked marvellous in anything that he wore, and recently he was more concerned about the things that were hidden underneath his lover’s clothing than what clothes he chose to wear.
“… but other times he’s so clingy it’s unnerving. It’s like he thinks I’m going to leave him,” Hokuto-chan continued ranting taking no notice of his disinterest in the conversation. Still, he had to pretend, didn’t he?
“Do you blame me for this, Hokuto-chan? Subaru-kun is the vision of morality. Perhaps it’s wrong for me to seduce him, no matter my feelings.”
“I don’t care about that! I just want him to be happy,” Hokuto retorted, pulling away from him slightly and closing into herself.
A weak knocking at the door interrupted whatever reassuring words he would have provided the girl. Hokuto stood up abruptly and ran to the door, seeming to forget that he was sitting right beside her.
Subaru entered the apartment looking tired and dishevelled, but no less beautiful than he did at any other time. Perhaps the boy would look like that after they made love for the first time.
“Hokuto-chan!” the boy cried out a little too happily for his liking before he threw his arms around his sister and embraced her in a warm hug. When his sister wrapped her arms around his shoulders, Subaru moved in even closer to her. His face showed an expression of pure bliss.
He never wore such an expression during their time together.
“Hello Subaru,” Hokuto replied for once sounding slightly less enthusiastic than her brother. “You’re back earlier than I expected.”
“I-I might have done the job a little too quickly but… I just really wanted to see you.”
“Hello, Subaru-kun! I’m glad to see that you’re back,” Seishriou cried out startling the boy. He was pleased when he reverted back to his usual self and pulled away from his sister.
Subaru looked at Seishirou with a bewildered expression as if he could not fathom what exactly he was doing there. “S-Seishirou-san! Erm… I’m sorry. I didn’t know that you were here…”
“I noticed…” he replied walking towards the boy a little too quickly. Subaru’s eyes widened and he took a step back.
Seishirou wrapped his arms around the boy’s waist, and pressed him gently against his chest, successfully trapping him with his body. The boy hesitantly wrapped his arms around him in return, but the action lacked enthusiasm.
“Subaru-kun, didn’t you miss me while you were gone?” Seishirou asked. He wasn’t aware that he sounded like a child begging for attention.
“O-Of course…”
“You remember your promise, don’t you?”
“Of course I do, Seishirou-san,” Subaru answered more confidently. His thin arms tightened around him. “I promised I would spend time with you after I got back from Kyoto.”
“But, isn’t it a little late for that,” Hokuto protested sternly.
“How would you like to come to my apartment tonight, Subaru-kun? I told you that my bed is very comfortable, didn’t I?”
Subaru nodded.
Seishriou wasn’t sure if he was confirming that he remembered him saying that or if he was agreeing to come with him, but he didn’t care. He led the boy out of the apartment, ignoring the nearly hysteric girl shouting after them.
Definitions:
Chawa - Tea Bowl
Chasen - Bamboo Whisk