Au secours!!

Aug 29, 2006 11:27

How do you gently tell somebody that you find them, at best, clingy, and at worst, creepy-psycho?

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Comments 12

gwendally August 29 2006, 15:54:54 UTC
I don't think you CAN tell them that. It just leaves the diagnosis open for argument. Rather, you can get to the crux of the problem. Whether or not they're clingy, creepy or cute as a button, you don't enjoy their company (no reason required) and would prefer to spend your time elsewhere (no alternative location need be mentioned.)

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tankyouverymuch August 29 2006, 16:02:14 UTC
Hrmph. She's pushing for a reason, and I'm trying hard not to be mean, but is not working.

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gwendally August 29 2006, 16:13:14 UTC
"I'm not articulate enough to explain it! I just don't enjoy being around you all that much. It doesn't have to be any particular reason, I just don't like the way *I* act when I'm with you. You push buttons in me that I don't like pushed."

It's me, not you. Really.

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tankyouverymuch August 29 2006, 16:13:36 UTC
Upon further reflection, that's a load of horseshit. She's trying to pull me into engaging further.

Well, not gonna play.

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mizalaina August 29 2006, 16:16:27 UTC
I'd probably say, "this behaviour makes me uncomfortable" and then explain why. I'm a big fan of getting things right out there. I figure that, if people can't handle a discussion that's framed in a polite and considerate way (which involves respect for my feelings as well as theirs), they probably don't belong in my life.

Maybe that means I'm a jerk, but it saves space for the people who truly are good friends, and it reduces my long-term stress even if it causes short-term stress.

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tankyouverymuch August 29 2006, 16:21:34 UTC
Ha! See, you rock. I don't think that's being a jerk i think that's being honest. And it's much nicer than "Hi. You're psycho. Please piss off now."

Also, I love your new name. With the eyeballs. It makes me happy :)

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gwendally August 29 2006, 17:26:43 UTC
New name? Must be a Real Life reference. I went and looked and her blog is still named "heterotic but not hetero" and that stopped making sense the moment I finally understood it. ;-)

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mizalaina August 29 2006, 19:27:11 UTC
Heehee. It's one of the little subtitles that appear at the beginning of every Futurama episode. It made me giggle, so it gets its fifteen minutes on LJ.

"Government-created killer nanorobot infection" is still my favourite, though. (From an episode of The Office.)

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