An Affirmation of Positivitiy: the Anti-Angst
I get down on myself a lot...but in person I know I can come off as arrogant. Ya know when I am not having a downswing or being manic, I dont feel like either of those extremes. Its true, I get down on how I look a lot and I dont think that is going to change...however, on the upside...
For example, I have great talent and even greater passion. When I love something, I love it through and through. This is true for music (as everyone close to me knows), my closest friends, and the only person I have ever really romantically loved: Shannon. I dont ever feel anything just a little...and mores the better...what kind of artist would I be if I was just a little bit moved...thats like just playing a few of the notes.
Also, I can be a pretty damn good leader. I am not the greatest follower, but I take pride in knowing that I can lead. Along with that, the times that I have taught or presented on the things I love and am passionate about, I have been pretty damn good. From telling people way more than they ever wanted to know about Baroque wind isntruments to teaching oboe at Signature, these are things I can do and do well.
I am also loyal. When I get attached, I get really attached....so for people like Shannon, Jen, Kat, a few others...they will never get rid of me. This can be an annoyance but it also means I will always care about them and try to help them to be happy.
So this journal entry may seem arrogant...it isn't and I think everyone who really knows me will agree. Sometimes I just need to reaffirm to myself that I am worth something more than my outside or the sum of my parts...Its not unhumble to remind yourself of what you are good at in the eye of potential failure.
For example, I have great talent and even greater passion. When I love something, I love it through and through. This is true for music (as everyone close to me knows), my closest friends, and the only person I have ever really romantically loved: Shannon. I dont ever feel anything just a little...and mores the better...what kind of artist would I be if I was just a little bit moved...thats like just playing a few of the notes.
Also, I can be a pretty damn good leader. I am not the greatest follower, but I take pride in knowing that I can lead. Along with that, the times that I have taught or presented on the things I love and am passionate about, I have been pretty damn good. From telling people way more than they ever wanted to know about Baroque wind isntruments to teaching oboe at Signature, these are things I can do and do well.
I am also loyal. When I get attached, I get really attached....so for people like Shannon, Jen, Kat, a few others...they will never get rid of me. This can be an annoyance but it also means I will always care about them and try to help them to be happy.
So this journal entry may seem arrogant...it isn't and I think everyone who really knows me will agree. Sometimes I just need to reaffirm to myself that I am worth something more than my outside or the sum of my parts...Its not unhumble to remind yourself of what you are good at in the eye of potential failure.