just because you don't see me cry, doesn't mean i don't cry

[tashabear]

Watching the most recent episode of Bones, and Booth is judging a parent who just lost his child because of his lack of reaction. I can totally relate to the guy who had a flat reaction, and I feel like I was judged by my former in-laws because I wasn't all sad, all the time, while Wolfie was sick and after he died. Worry and grief are exhausting,

Comments

[esmerel]

A friend of mine's husband was in a motorcycle accident gosh, almost exactly 3 years ago now. He survived, but he was in a coma for quite a while and while he lived, he's not the same person he was.

While he was in the hospital, several of her extended family were bothered by her reactions - she had lots of friends who dropped things to come help her and make her laugh and stuff - the family just 'wtf how can you POSSIBLY LAUGH YOUR REACTION IS BAD AND WRONG'.

She had more than a few issues with that too. You are not alone on that front.

[zillabean]

Everyone copes and heals in their own way. I don't think he would've wanted you to handle your grief and emotions any differently than you did. Hang in there, and know he's still got a glint in his eye for you evermore <3

[shelbystripes]

I had a reaction to the same thing in that episode, just to Booth's surprising lack of understanding. It's not just a general complaint about the role reversal, about the fact that Booth is usually the one better at human relation. He's a veteran, he's friends with war widows, he ought to understand these things. It made no sense to me.

Also, *hugs*

I've been busy, but belated sympathy is hopefully better than none.

[tashabear]

He is better at human relations, but this isn't the sort of human he's particularly good at relating to. I think he thinks that Bones is alone in her weirdness; he doesn't understand the sort of soul pain that is so deep you just *cannot* express it, and people like her and the physicist don't express themselves like everyone else anyway. The end was so beautiful it about broke me, though. I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

Don't worry about the busy. I have been too. It's weird; I think my concept of "new year" has shifted. The new year for me now starts on December 15th.