Talking in it's sleep, again -
Author: Tasminalice
Rating: NC-17 (language)
Length: 2000 words, approx.
Summary:
You take the veil
You'll take the dive
A Skins-themed apocalyptic story.
A/N: Third part of This; Finality. Full author notes, in part 1 (see journal).
Sorry for the longer wait, this chapter was difficult to write.
--
Cook ended up putting a few more items into the bag Freddie had begun to pack. Naomi couldn't watch.
Even he's doing it robotically, like it was taking hours for his thoughts to reach his hand from his brain.
Thomas finds a canvas and covers -
Naomi reacts just in time, bile rises in her throat and she is violently sick next to a crop of brambles. The other two don't flinch.
When she's done spitting the remaining moisture out of her bone-dry mouth, Naomi does a physical once over, out of pure instinct; to check that all of her anatomy was present and accounted for, (to make sure she wasn't dreaming).
Her heart is beating louder than anything else, still. Her palms are on fire, she can feel a trickle of blood run down one. She ached, all over. Especially her shoulder muscles. It was a deep-seated throb, and she couldn't remember not feeling sore and broken.
Eventually Thomas muttered a few words, but she couldn't, for the life of her, comprehend them. Woodenly, she got up and picked up the hiking bag she'd filled. It felt like hours ago, the urgency and fear. Now she felt nothing. Naomi's muscles screamed in protest, but she bit through the pain and got it onto her back.
This time, Thomas led, with Naomi stumbling behind him. Cook was further back, dumbly carrying two packs.
She remembered the feeling of finality, and the visceral image of breaking a neck. She remembered the smell, the salty cloy of blood, and a softer smell of decay that had hung around the area.
Naomi didn't remember with feeling, though she suspected that would come later. For now, it was a numb blur, with a growing sense of dread at returning to their friends.
And Emily. Emily who wouldn't hurt a fly, if she could help it. With a surprising amount of worry, in her unfeeling state, Naomi tried to anticipate her reaction. Failed miserably.
The sun was not far from setting, when Naomi began to recognize her surroundings. She couldn't help but take note of every tree, every leaf, every shade of green. It was like her emotional sensitivity had been replaced by heightened array of physical senses. Things were slower, too.
She sensed Thomas stop in front of her, and Naomi did the same, without looking up.
The next thing she felt was two arms around her. Warm, but too much. It was too palpable, too solid.
Without thinking, she pulled away roughly.
"Naomi, what's wrong? Why did - ?" The husky voice was a shock to her hypersensitive eardrums.
She shook her head furiously, and let her bag fall to the ground, with a dull thud.
--
Effy watched as most of the smaller group came into the clearing.
Thoughts raced through her mind, as to why - no.
Watching in disbelieving horror as Thomas talked to Katie, to the rest of them. Cook sat apart, tears streaming his face, wrought in an iron grimace. Naomi and Emily were nowhere to be seen.
Effy felt her insides revolt almost immediately. Her guts squirmed and threaded themselves through her lungs, making breathing nigh impossible.
Before the full-blown panic attack hit her, before the adrenaline mainlined into her heart, Effy regained some scrap of composure, and bottled down the emotion for later. Labelled it, set it on the shelf.
This threatened to spill and shatter when she watched Katie fall to her knees, sobbing quietly.
--
Hours later, its dark, and the fire is roaring brightly. No one wanted to forego the light and warmth tonight, even if there were things out there that might be able to see it. Cook offered to get the wood, obviously wanting to get away from everyone else. He was sitting on the embankment now, his back to the centre of camp. Smoke curled up and away from him, clear in the moonlight.
Effy considered talking to him, but couldn't bring herself to move. A chill breeze had picked up, and she was sitting in her purple sleeping bag, watching the rest of them.
Katie sat in the middle, with JJ and Pandora on either side of her. Her eyes were red, puffy, her makeup smeared everywhere. Effy saw her hands, balled up into tight fists, took it as a sign. JJ, his eyes wide, was rocking back and forth, occasionally mouthing words. Pandora was expressionless, staring into the fire blankly. None of them had felt like eating.
A fourth tent had been set up. They all pointed towards the fire, in a star formation. The newest addition had been acquired from the hunter's camp, it seemed to not fit with their own. Effy had offered to use the new tent, she guessed that Katie would crawl in later, when she was ready.
Naomi and Emily had retreated to their own tent, nearly as soon as the smaller group had gotten back. Naomi had seemed unsteady, almost insubstantial. Her hands were shaking chronically, she had been as white as a ghost.
Effy moved closer to the fire, warming her hands.
"You alright, Panda?"
Pandora looked up, temporarily taken aback. She nodded.
Effy smiled. Of course she wasn't. None of them were.
She got up, stretched.
"Night then. Katie..." Effy paused, then nodded.
Katie didn't respond, didn't make any indication that she heard her.
She only knew when she heard the zip slide on the tent, later on that night. Effy was awake, but chose not to react to Katie's entrance. Instead, she rolled over and saw Katie curling up in her sleeping bag, making herself as small as possible.
--
Emily's arm was around Naomi's waist, it still felt like too much.
She'd hardly told Emily anything, she didn't feel like she could ever tell anyone about it. At the moment, it was too raw. Later, Naomi knew she would try to block out the memory, the feelings.
When Emily pulled her ever so slightly closer, she began shaking again. Naomi felt soft kisses on her shoulder blade.
"Hey, hey. What's wrong?" Emily whispered into her neck.
"I can't - " Naomi wheezed feebly. She gave up. "My hands hurt." It was partly true.
Emily half sat up, Naomi rolled over, facing her.
"I - when I - I think I cut them."
"Show me," Emily demanded, and gasped when Naomi did.
Her palms were a mass of small lacerations, splinters and lack of the top layer of skin.
"Jesus, Nay, why didn't you tell me?"
Naomi shrugged weakly.
Emily found her bag and got the tweezers out from the toiletries. For Katie's eyebrows, apparently. She couldn't see the reason, when they were packed for a one night trip.
Naomi handed her a lighter, Emily held the flame underneath the tweezers for a few seconds, before blowing on it and taking on of Naomi's hands into her own.
"Tell me if it hurts, okay?"
She pulled the first few splinters out without trouble, but the third made Naomi hiss, and flinch.
"That one hurt."
"Sorry." Emily frowned, and concentrated harder.
Seeing her like this, Naomi felt her eyes burning. When Emily tsked and tried a different angle on a particularly nasty splinter, she felt the tears spill down her cheeks.
"We'll just get a plaster, and cover those - " Emily looked up.
Naomi couldn't meet her eyes.
"Nay, it's going to be alright." Emily pulled her into a tight embrace, wincing when Naomi began to shudder against her, weeping silently. Naomi's forehead was heavy against her shoulder. Rubbing circles on her back, Emily could do nothing except whisper promises she didn't know if she could keep.
--
Effy woke, to a bright interior of a tent, and a back pressing into her own.
Not wanting to wake Katie, who deserved rest and probably wouldn't be happy about being woken up early, Effy quietly slipped out of her sleeping bag and slowly unzipped the tent.
The sun was bright, but lower than she expected, and a quick glance at her watch showed it was only quarter to eight. This was probably the earliest she'd gotten up in years. A dew had set in that night, the forest smelled of rain.
The rest of them were already up, going about morning ablutions. The creek next to camp was apparently "freezing, but probably cleaner than city water," according to Thomas. Nodding at Panda, Effy slid down the rock face gracefully, and splashed into the almost knee-deep water. The cold was a shock, but it woke her up, and after washing her face, she felt more able to function.
Climbing less smoothly back up the slope, she saw that Katie had come out of the tent, was looking bleary and still puffy-eyed. JJ had been cooking some of the noodles they had gotten from the other camp. They were army-surplus and rather disgusting, but Effy's stomach had been grumbling slightly, and she took some without complaint.
After they were all fed (even Naomi who looked like she was going to throw up), JJ called the council again. Sitting in the sunshine, having eaten and washed, they all felt marginally better. The shock of Freddie's death had nowhere near left them, an undertone of raw fear and emotion stayed with them, as well as a sense of strange urgency. Like they had to do something, make plans, decisions, so to stay busy.
They weren't talking nearly as much as there had been, Emily and Naomi were almost silent, the past night had obviously changed something between them, a sense of comfort and wholeness had descended.
"So I think we should do a stocktake, find out what we have, what we need. Set in place security measures, in case one of those people," JJ gulped, "decide to visit." It had been an unspoken fear, if the monsters that had attacked Freddie decided to invade their camp.
Cook and Thomas rounded up all the bags, and laid out the contents.
"We got that extra tent, three torches, four more lighters, a compass, a small axe, all that food over there," Cook pointed to where JJ had spread it all out, and was counting it. "Two machetes, three water bottles, a set of four walkie-talkies, thanks to Naomikins." He winked. Naomi didn't seem to notice.
"And guns." Thomas said, quietly.
"Guns? What the fuck, you guys. It's dangerous to just have them around." Emily was alarmed.
"Calm it, Em. We know how to use them. I do, anyway." Cook, cocky as ever. "And besides, whatever is out there is dangerous too. This makes it fair, yeah?"
"We only have enough food for a week and a half."
There was a general noise of concern at this. They hoped the stuff gathered would last a lot longer than that.
"We're not fucking going back." Naomi muttered. Everyone glanced at her, before looking away. Effy in particular, saw a sort of primal fear in her, it was troubling just to watch her.
Thinking logically, JJ struck a thought. "What about the petrol station? It had heaps of stuff there that we need. Food, first aid supplies, probably. And it's only a few miles from here. And we have the car, which Effy can drive, and we probably have enough fuel to get us there and back several times easily, since we filled up last time - "
Cook clapped loudly to get his attention. Most people winced at the sound.
"We can't split up," Effy murmured, mostly to herself. Cook nodded.
"It'd be better with all of us. More people to carry shit."
"So, when is this going to like, happen?" Katie looked worried.
"In a few days, I guess. Although that does depend on the circumstances."
"Like what?"
"Flesh eating monsters that might have come out of bad B movies." JJ let out a nervous giggle.
Rating: NC-17 (language)
Length: 2000 words, approx.
Summary:
You take the veil
You'll take the dive
A Skins-themed apocalyptic story.
A/N: Third part of This; Finality. Full author notes, in part 1 (see journal).
Sorry for the longer wait, this chapter was difficult to write.
--
Cook ended up putting a few more items into the bag Freddie had begun to pack. Naomi couldn't watch.
Even he's doing it robotically, like it was taking hours for his thoughts to reach his hand from his brain.
Thomas finds a canvas and covers -
Naomi reacts just in time, bile rises in her throat and she is violently sick next to a crop of brambles. The other two don't flinch.
When she's done spitting the remaining moisture out of her bone-dry mouth, Naomi does a physical once over, out of pure instinct; to check that all of her anatomy was present and accounted for, (to make sure she wasn't dreaming).
Her heart is beating louder than anything else, still. Her palms are on fire, she can feel a trickle of blood run down one. She ached, all over. Especially her shoulder muscles. It was a deep-seated throb, and she couldn't remember not feeling sore and broken.
Eventually Thomas muttered a few words, but she couldn't, for the life of her, comprehend them. Woodenly, she got up and picked up the hiking bag she'd filled. It felt like hours ago, the urgency and fear. Now she felt nothing. Naomi's muscles screamed in protest, but she bit through the pain and got it onto her back.
This time, Thomas led, with Naomi stumbling behind him. Cook was further back, dumbly carrying two packs.
She remembered the feeling of finality, and the visceral image of breaking a neck. She remembered the smell, the salty cloy of blood, and a softer smell of decay that had hung around the area.
Naomi didn't remember with feeling, though she suspected that would come later. For now, it was a numb blur, with a growing sense of dread at returning to their friends.
And Emily. Emily who wouldn't hurt a fly, if she could help it. With a surprising amount of worry, in her unfeeling state, Naomi tried to anticipate her reaction. Failed miserably.
The sun was not far from setting, when Naomi began to recognize her surroundings. She couldn't help but take note of every tree, every leaf, every shade of green. It was like her emotional sensitivity had been replaced by heightened array of physical senses. Things were slower, too.
She sensed Thomas stop in front of her, and Naomi did the same, without looking up.
The next thing she felt was two arms around her. Warm, but too much. It was too palpable, too solid.
Without thinking, she pulled away roughly.
"Naomi, what's wrong? Why did - ?" The husky voice was a shock to her hypersensitive eardrums.
She shook her head furiously, and let her bag fall to the ground, with a dull thud.
--
Effy watched as most of the smaller group came into the clearing.
Thoughts raced through her mind, as to why - no.
Watching in disbelieving horror as Thomas talked to Katie, to the rest of them. Cook sat apart, tears streaming his face, wrought in an iron grimace. Naomi and Emily were nowhere to be seen.
Effy felt her insides revolt almost immediately. Her guts squirmed and threaded themselves through her lungs, making breathing nigh impossible.
Before the full-blown panic attack hit her, before the adrenaline mainlined into her heart, Effy regained some scrap of composure, and bottled down the emotion for later. Labelled it, set it on the shelf.
This threatened to spill and shatter when she watched Katie fall to her knees, sobbing quietly.
--
Hours later, its dark, and the fire is roaring brightly. No one wanted to forego the light and warmth tonight, even if there were things out there that might be able to see it. Cook offered to get the wood, obviously wanting to get away from everyone else. He was sitting on the embankment now, his back to the centre of camp. Smoke curled up and away from him, clear in the moonlight.
Effy considered talking to him, but couldn't bring herself to move. A chill breeze had picked up, and she was sitting in her purple sleeping bag, watching the rest of them.
Katie sat in the middle, with JJ and Pandora on either side of her. Her eyes were red, puffy, her makeup smeared everywhere. Effy saw her hands, balled up into tight fists, took it as a sign. JJ, his eyes wide, was rocking back and forth, occasionally mouthing words. Pandora was expressionless, staring into the fire blankly. None of them had felt like eating.
A fourth tent had been set up. They all pointed towards the fire, in a star formation. The newest addition had been acquired from the hunter's camp, it seemed to not fit with their own. Effy had offered to use the new tent, she guessed that Katie would crawl in later, when she was ready.
Naomi and Emily had retreated to their own tent, nearly as soon as the smaller group had gotten back. Naomi had seemed unsteady, almost insubstantial. Her hands were shaking chronically, she had been as white as a ghost.
Effy moved closer to the fire, warming her hands.
"You alright, Panda?"
Pandora looked up, temporarily taken aback. She nodded.
Effy smiled. Of course she wasn't. None of them were.
She got up, stretched.
"Night then. Katie..." Effy paused, then nodded.
Katie didn't respond, didn't make any indication that she heard her.
She only knew when she heard the zip slide on the tent, later on that night. Effy was awake, but chose not to react to Katie's entrance. Instead, she rolled over and saw Katie curling up in her sleeping bag, making herself as small as possible.
--
Emily's arm was around Naomi's waist, it still felt like too much.
She'd hardly told Emily anything, she didn't feel like she could ever tell anyone about it. At the moment, it was too raw. Later, Naomi knew she would try to block out the memory, the feelings.
When Emily pulled her ever so slightly closer, she began shaking again. Naomi felt soft kisses on her shoulder blade.
"Hey, hey. What's wrong?" Emily whispered into her neck.
"I can't - " Naomi wheezed feebly. She gave up. "My hands hurt." It was partly true.
Emily half sat up, Naomi rolled over, facing her.
"I - when I - I think I cut them."
"Show me," Emily demanded, and gasped when Naomi did.
Her palms were a mass of small lacerations, splinters and lack of the top layer of skin.
"Jesus, Nay, why didn't you tell me?"
Naomi shrugged weakly.
Emily found her bag and got the tweezers out from the toiletries. For Katie's eyebrows, apparently. She couldn't see the reason, when they were packed for a one night trip.
Naomi handed her a lighter, Emily held the flame underneath the tweezers for a few seconds, before blowing on it and taking on of Naomi's hands into her own.
"Tell me if it hurts, okay?"
She pulled the first few splinters out without trouble, but the third made Naomi hiss, and flinch.
"That one hurt."
"Sorry." Emily frowned, and concentrated harder.
Seeing her like this, Naomi felt her eyes burning. When Emily tsked and tried a different angle on a particularly nasty splinter, she felt the tears spill down her cheeks.
"We'll just get a plaster, and cover those - " Emily looked up.
Naomi couldn't meet her eyes.
"Nay, it's going to be alright." Emily pulled her into a tight embrace, wincing when Naomi began to shudder against her, weeping silently. Naomi's forehead was heavy against her shoulder. Rubbing circles on her back, Emily could do nothing except whisper promises she didn't know if she could keep.
--
Effy woke, to a bright interior of a tent, and a back pressing into her own.
Not wanting to wake Katie, who deserved rest and probably wouldn't be happy about being woken up early, Effy quietly slipped out of her sleeping bag and slowly unzipped the tent.
The sun was bright, but lower than she expected, and a quick glance at her watch showed it was only quarter to eight. This was probably the earliest she'd gotten up in years. A dew had set in that night, the forest smelled of rain.
The rest of them were already up, going about morning ablutions. The creek next to camp was apparently "freezing, but probably cleaner than city water," according to Thomas. Nodding at Panda, Effy slid down the rock face gracefully, and splashed into the almost knee-deep water. The cold was a shock, but it woke her up, and after washing her face, she felt more able to function.
Climbing less smoothly back up the slope, she saw that Katie had come out of the tent, was looking bleary and still puffy-eyed. JJ had been cooking some of the noodles they had gotten from the other camp. They were army-surplus and rather disgusting, but Effy's stomach had been grumbling slightly, and she took some without complaint.
After they were all fed (even Naomi who looked like she was going to throw up), JJ called the council again. Sitting in the sunshine, having eaten and washed, they all felt marginally better. The shock of Freddie's death had nowhere near left them, an undertone of raw fear and emotion stayed with them, as well as a sense of strange urgency. Like they had to do something, make plans, decisions, so to stay busy.
They weren't talking nearly as much as there had been, Emily and Naomi were almost silent, the past night had obviously changed something between them, a sense of comfort and wholeness had descended.
"So I think we should do a stocktake, find out what we have, what we need. Set in place security measures, in case one of those people," JJ gulped, "decide to visit." It had been an unspoken fear, if the monsters that had attacked Freddie decided to invade their camp.
Cook and Thomas rounded up all the bags, and laid out the contents.
"We got that extra tent, three torches, four more lighters, a compass, a small axe, all that food over there," Cook pointed to where JJ had spread it all out, and was counting it. "Two machetes, three water bottles, a set of four walkie-talkies, thanks to Naomikins." He winked. Naomi didn't seem to notice.
"And guns." Thomas said, quietly.
"Guns? What the fuck, you guys. It's dangerous to just have them around." Emily was alarmed.
"Calm it, Em. We know how to use them. I do, anyway." Cook, cocky as ever. "And besides, whatever is out there is dangerous too. This makes it fair, yeah?"
"We only have enough food for a week and a half."
There was a general noise of concern at this. They hoped the stuff gathered would last a lot longer than that.
"We're not fucking going back." Naomi muttered. Everyone glanced at her, before looking away. Effy in particular, saw a sort of primal fear in her, it was troubling just to watch her.
Thinking logically, JJ struck a thought. "What about the petrol station? It had heaps of stuff there that we need. Food, first aid supplies, probably. And it's only a few miles from here. And we have the car, which Effy can drive, and we probably have enough fuel to get us there and back several times easily, since we filled up last time - "
Cook clapped loudly to get his attention. Most people winced at the sound.
"We can't split up," Effy murmured, mostly to herself. Cook nodded.
"It'd be better with all of us. More people to carry shit."
"So, when is this going to like, happen?" Katie looked worried.
"In a few days, I guess. Although that does depend on the circumstances."
"Like what?"
"Flesh eating monsters that might have come out of bad B movies." JJ let out a nervous giggle.