Well well well, i havent wrote in this shit box for a while. Things are changing. Everythings falling apart and putting itself back together, but in a whole different pattern. Its confusing, really. Lifes confusing. And shitty. Very shitty.

This weekends May 24. Yay :). Its going to suck though. There are no parties. Whats May 24 without parties ( Read more... )

This is what i wanted. But now that i got it i dont want it so much anymore.:( I thought it would make things easier. And it did.. at least now i know what i want. But its too late. Fuck.. Why'd i even trust you not to hurt me? Maybe cause they said you wouldnt. Maybe cause i could see that you were different from the rest. I dont know. But ( Read more... )

No school again for me. Man i really gotta start going to school. Isnt there like a law that if you miss so many days you get kicked out? Oh well.. they have to give you a warning first right. And i havent got one of those. Maybe cause i havent been at school to get one *thinking face*.

Well .. today is the day it all begins. Or rather ends. But ( Read more... )

Whats your name. Whats your number. I would like to get to know ya. Can we have a conversation. The night is young girl gimmie a chance.

I cant do this. But i need to. Need to. Like i need you. But if i need you why am i letting go? Does that mean i dont have to do this? No. I have to.  I need to. When the time is right. Soon. Cause i cant take this much longer. This, i cant take this. No, i cant take what comes after this. So why am i forcing myself past this, towards what comes ( Read more... )

Just to clear things up i was not talking about killing myself in my previous entries. Sorry kids but thats not gonna happen any time soon. Actually the decision i've made isnt stupid at all. Its a decision that you wouldnt expect anyone to make. Especially not me. You think you know. But you dont. You'll all be shocked. And you'll find out why ( Read more... )

Soon. I'll do it soon. I need to get it over with. But i cant bring myself to do it. I'd rather be dead. Yeah. Dead. That'd be nice.

Fuck it all and no regrets.

The one i want. The one i need. The one that i cant get enough of. The one i love. The one that excites me and intrigues me. The one thats addictive. The one that makes me happy. The one that makes me feel special. The one that gives me the time of my life. The one that keeps me alive. The one that makes my heart beat ( Read more... )

I  remember the look in your eyes when i told you that this was goodbye, You were begging me not tonight. Not here. Not now. We're looking up at the same night sky. We keep pretending the sun will not rise. We'll be together for one more night, somewhere somehow.

Too bad that look was in both their eyes. And mine too. This cant be goodbye. Goodbye ( Read more... )

Check it out. The sick new layout. Much love goes out to Chantelle ♥ who did it for me. :)

I smell like two different boys right now. My left side smells like christopher and my right side smells like christopher. The two christopher's. I smell like Swiss Army and Cool Water. I cant decide what smell i like more. And thats not the only thing i cant ( Read more... )