Do I offend?

[tawdrysuki]

I don't know why this bothers me, but it does. A bunch of my KC friends who were all "Road trip! Your wedding's gonna be awesome!" six months ago are bailing on coming now that it's a few weeks away. A good 60% of them haven't even RSVP'd, preferring instead to awkwardly avoid me at an art event many of us converged at recently. WTF

Comments

Not a whiny, selfish ass!

[anonymous]

You are perfectly justified in being upset!

I have similar feelings about various events with my family. In August, JP and I drove 8 hours to Albany, NY. We stayed with one of my aunts and my cousin who lives UP THE STREET FROM HER couldn't find 15 minutes in the weekend to come see us to say hello! Over Christmas, I wanted to go with my parents to visit my grandparents and my father mentioned it to my grandfather, who indicated that he didn't want me staying with them. Since they're getting a little old to travel here and I can't stay with them, I guess he was really saying that he had no desire to ever see his granddaughter again.
Now, to be honest, I don't necessarily enjoy spending time with either my cousin or grandfather. But I was raised to think that when family or people you care about are around, you make do. You put some blankets in the bathtub for them to sleep in if that's the only space you have. You make the effort. Period.
It's too bad that other people weren't brought up the same way. Grrrrrr.

Re: Not a whiny, selfish ass!

[tawdrysuki]

Thank you. Yeah, it's not the people who have real stuff going on and RSVP'd to that effect that are bothering me. I mean, we will miss them, but I totally understand that trips to France and work obligations happen sometimes, and it's all cool. It's the friends around here who just don't seem to want to make the effort to even respond, and are kind of blanking me even, that are stirring up this particular emotional shitpot. And I probably wouldn't be as bummed if they hadn't been all excited about it when I gave advance notice last year. (I was kind of figuring our extended family wouldn't bother, since we are the Weird Freaky Devil Children or whatever.)

Oh well. I am letting it go today. I am sure it will actually be nice to have a more intimate reception anyway.

[agent_mph]

i'm so sorry you're feeling like this. honestly, this is one of the reasons i didn't make a big deal about my wedding...and because i didn't make a big deal, i was still unhappy. a lot of our family and friends didn't rsvp or show up (or even send cards/gifts), and we got the usual lame excuses. i'm still upset and bitter about it. i can tell you to try not to take it personally, but i know from experience it's easier said than done. so concentrate on what the day is about and what it means to you. you will be an AMAZING and FABULOUS bride, you're in love, and you're marrying your boy! have fun and revel in the day. don't think about everyone who's missing out...because they ARE missing out

[tawdrysuki]

Oh, miss lady, don't worry about anything...you are one of the lovely people who RSVP'd and wrote us a lovely note and has a really good excuse. (Even better than the "I'll be in France" guy.) You are not a jerk, not in the least.

We'll be in town for about a week, and it would be awesome to get together. You still at the hotmail addy? I'll shoot you some info.

[agent_mph]

c_colonna at hotmail dot com!

[brraaaiins]

to be blunt...fuck 'em, it's their loss. Your wedding will be amazing and we are all going to have so much fun dancing and drinking and celebrating you and doug!! Luvs u birdie.

[tawdrysuki]

Thanks bird. You are the bomb-diggity and we are gonna have an awesome time. With the benefit of a night's sleep I am now feeling a bit more positive. Like, there are so many people coming that I'm really excited to see. And my dress is gonna be awesome. And there will be leftovers to take home, by god!

You heard from Mitch at all, by the way? Wanted to know if he was coming but hadn't heard back from him.