well, at least the sick feeling is gone.
now it's just that empty alone feeling.
the waiting.
because for some reason, i know, KNOW, i am going to take him back.
he doesn't deserve it.
he broke my trust multiple times.
he broke my heart.
and i know he is going to do it again.
so why am i going to give him that chance when i know it's going to happen ?
he ( Read more... )

God i feel sick.
i am so confused.
i am upset.
i really want to shoot myself right now.
what did i do to deserve this ?
it's not my fault. it's yours.
you don't love me. you never did. if you're going to lie to me and do this 
your feelings for me weren't as strong as i thought they were.
i love you so much.
which is why i am having conflicting feelings in ( Read more... )

i love it when he comes over and we just lay down for hours on end not really watching tv.
i just love being with him.
&he's being really cute lately.
i'm happy.
<3

i know i contradict myself a lot but i don't care.
bottom line:i'm happy.

:]

well. i'm confused.

but.
fklasdhkg
i'm in a world of bliss.
even when i'm mad at him and i'm watching him sit on my curb and be upset at me for being upset with him for just wanting to see me.
why do i have to be so cold hearted ?
i think i am going to try to not be so damn mean to him because i don't want to lose him.
he means everything to me.
he is my ( Read more... )

 haven't been in here in a while.
me and clint said i love you for the first time monday night.
tuesday my mom found out charles died.
we never called him.
i don't think it's sunken in yet.
i feel so bad. i hate seeing my mother cry. it is absolutely heartbreaking.
i had the most physical contact with her i've had since i was about 3. 
i felt so bad.
:\
it' ( Read more... )

haha.
tonight was great.
got something out in the open that i've been thinking about for a while.
ahhh.
yay.
haha.
i'm so happy now.
i don't think any one has any idea what kind of feeling i have right now.
TO BAD CLINT WON'T FREAKING SAY IT BECAUSE HE KNOWS I'M TO SCARED.
i will.
eventually.
now that i know what i do.
AHH
i'm going to bed happy tonight.
even ( Read more... )

cardigan welsh corgi plz.
OMG I WANT A SMALL LITTLE BABY PUPPY SO BAD.,skdghaslkhgdskldhg
to bad my birthday is in 6 months.
grr.
i got really scared clint was going to break up with me today..
i called alyssa and she was asking me if we broke up
and then she wouldnt tell me why she thought that
and then i started freaking out because he said we needed to ( Read more... )

tengo un secreto para mi novio.
no hablo con el.
no se hacer accentos.
ahh
i think im going to go get ready.

i want to go to clints house

its my mom's birthday.

ehh

kelseys party tonight.

i hope he doesnt go to temecula.

i hate sharing him.

he's mine.

i might tell him my secret on new years.

wahahah.

i'm crazy.<3

idk why i always freak out like that.
it's getting annoying and i dont know how he deals with it.
i'm afraid he is going to get fed up with it soon.
fas,khdkgs
why do i have to be fucking insane.

so today i had my first behind the wheel.
GASKLHDGK AHH EXCITING.
haha.
i drove with tyler, from driving school.
which is funny because he is the one that pissed me off the most and the one i really didnt like.
oh well.
we got along in the car :]
i hope im with him the next time too.
i really dont want to be with someone i dont know.
oye oye oye.

so yeah.
me ( Read more... )