After Class 4/? - The Lunch
Here's part 4, I hope this clears a little up for you. Enjoy
John managed to get through the next two periods without declaring his sexuality to the students. However, the news had travelled quickly along the grapevine, and John swore he could hear the whispers of `fag` and `poof.’ He tried to shrug it off but by the end of the third period he was ready to give up and go home to Ella.
He slowly stalked towards the cafeteria, trying not to notice the snide remarks and filthy looks. Maybe he’d feel better after he’d eaten. He had been through worse, and they were only kids. He reached the cafeteria doors and pushed them open. The whole cafeteria stopped what they were doing and looked at him. He’d never felt so isolated in his entire life. Maybe he should just quit while he was ahead. Even when he was queuing for his food, he could still feel their eyes on him, burning into the back of his skull.
He walked to the furthest corner of the cafeteria hoping he’d just disappear, that they couldn’t stare at him, accusing him. He looked at the food on his plate. He had no appetite, how could he? How could eat when all he felt was ashamed? Ashamed of whom he was? The memories of his childhood came flooding back. The beatings he suffered, the abuse, the taunts. Every night, running home to his mother, to cry on her shoulder. She always knew he was different and she accepted him for it. She understood him.
He felt like crying for his mother. No, he couldn’t do that. He’d let silly high school kids destroy his life once; he refused to let them do it again. He jumped when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. He turned around hoping it wasn’t the principal--he’d already had enough today. He smiled when he saw Rodney McKay smiling down at him.
“Can we sit here John?” Rodney asked. John laughed. The whole school had alienated him, it’s not like he was going to say no.
“Of course” He looked to the larger man standing next to Rodney. He was the same height as Rodney, but slightly skinner. He had a slight beard and a friendly smile, something John hadn’t seen many of today.
“I’m John Sheppard,” he stretched out his hand glad that the other man returned the gesture and didn’t turn away in disgust.
“Carson Beckett. Nice to meet you.”
“So, I’m guessing you heard about it then?” Rodney smiled sadly and nodded. He’d overheard two of his students talking about John coming out to his class.
“Yeah. I think you were very brave to do that. I’m sorry about how they reacted.”
“Well, I should have expected it, really; I don’t know why I did it. I just blurted it out. Oh, kids, by the way I’m gay! I should have gone all the way. `I’m gay kids; I’m a single gay father. Most of my family except my mother have disowned me. I quit my last job because several kids where getting abusive and threatened my little girl. I can see that would have gone down well! They said I shouldn’t be allowed to teach. They think I’m a danger to them. I have a little girl for god’s sake!” By this time John had tears flowing down his face and he was finding it hard to breathe, the odd hiccup breaking the silence between the three men.
“Oh, wow, John, I’m so sorry. I had no idea you were a father.”
“Yeah. She’s my little pride and joy, six months old. Her name’s Ella. I adopted her when she was two months old, and she is the most beautiful little girl. I don’t know what I’d do without her.” A light seemed to shine in John’s eyes as he spoke of her.
“Look, guys, I think I’m gonna go to my classroom now, I need alone time. Thanks for not abandoning me. I really appreciate it.” He smiled genuinely and walked away. Rodney stared at his retreating back and wanted nothing more than to take him in his arms and make it all better.
John entered at his classroom and sat at his desk. He looked out the window, remembering exactly what happened in the first period of the day, and he broke down and cried.
Thx for reading!! Feedback is welcomed!!
John managed to get through the next two periods without declaring his sexuality to the students. However, the news had travelled quickly along the grapevine, and John swore he could hear the whispers of `fag` and `poof.’ He tried to shrug it off but by the end of the third period he was ready to give up and go home to Ella.
He slowly stalked towards the cafeteria, trying not to notice the snide remarks and filthy looks. Maybe he’d feel better after he’d eaten. He had been through worse, and they were only kids. He reached the cafeteria doors and pushed them open. The whole cafeteria stopped what they were doing and looked at him. He’d never felt so isolated in his entire life. Maybe he should just quit while he was ahead. Even when he was queuing for his food, he could still feel their eyes on him, burning into the back of his skull.
He walked to the furthest corner of the cafeteria hoping he’d just disappear, that they couldn’t stare at him, accusing him. He looked at the food on his plate. He had no appetite, how could he? How could eat when all he felt was ashamed? Ashamed of whom he was? The memories of his childhood came flooding back. The beatings he suffered, the abuse, the taunts. Every night, running home to his mother, to cry on her shoulder. She always knew he was different and she accepted him for it. She understood him.
He felt like crying for his mother. No, he couldn’t do that. He’d let silly high school kids destroy his life once; he refused to let them do it again. He jumped when he felt a hand touch his shoulder. He turned around hoping it wasn’t the principal--he’d already had enough today. He smiled when he saw Rodney McKay smiling down at him.
“Can we sit here John?” Rodney asked. John laughed. The whole school had alienated him, it’s not like he was going to say no.
“Of course” He looked to the larger man standing next to Rodney. He was the same height as Rodney, but slightly skinner. He had a slight beard and a friendly smile, something John hadn’t seen many of today.
“I’m John Sheppard,” he stretched out his hand glad that the other man returned the gesture and didn’t turn away in disgust.
“Carson Beckett. Nice to meet you.”
“So, I’m guessing you heard about it then?” Rodney smiled sadly and nodded. He’d overheard two of his students talking about John coming out to his class.
“Yeah. I think you were very brave to do that. I’m sorry about how they reacted.”
“Well, I should have expected it, really; I don’t know why I did it. I just blurted it out. Oh, kids, by the way I’m gay! I should have gone all the way. `I’m gay kids; I’m a single gay father. Most of my family except my mother have disowned me. I quit my last job because several kids where getting abusive and threatened my little girl. I can see that would have gone down well! They said I shouldn’t be allowed to teach. They think I’m a danger to them. I have a little girl for god’s sake!” By this time John had tears flowing down his face and he was finding it hard to breathe, the odd hiccup breaking the silence between the three men.
“Oh, wow, John, I’m so sorry. I had no idea you were a father.”
“Yeah. She’s my little pride and joy, six months old. Her name’s Ella. I adopted her when she was two months old, and she is the most beautiful little girl. I don’t know what I’d do without her.” A light seemed to shine in John’s eyes as he spoke of her.
“Look, guys, I think I’m gonna go to my classroom now, I need alone time. Thanks for not abandoning me. I really appreciate it.” He smiled genuinely and walked away. Rodney stared at his retreating back and wanted nothing more than to take him in his arms and make it all better.
John entered at his classroom and sat at his desk. He looked out the window, remembering exactly what happened in the first period of the day, and he broke down and cried.
Thx for reading!! Feedback is welcomed!!