Fic: All the Days (7/8)
Fic: All the Days (Part 7/8)
Fandom: Legend of the Seeker
Pairing: Cara/Kahlan
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 67,000
Summary: Years after they sealed the rift, Cara discovers that being a hero isn't all it's cracked up to be, and Kahlan discovers that Cara still makes things complicated.
18
"You son of a bitch," Cara hissed, lunging at Henry. The man barely avoided her blow, and then there were a half-dozen soldiers surrounding her. Cara kicked at one soldier, hearing his howl as his kneecap snapped. She reached to draw her agiels, but she suddenly felt a blinding pain in the back of her neck and sank to her knees. Before she could rise again, she felt her arms grabbed roughly, and she was yanked to her feet by several of the soldiers. She realized a second company had come down the hallway behind them. She saw Kahlan being held the same way, overcome before she could Confess any of them. Quickly, the soldiers bound their arms with rope, yanking tight enough for Cara to feel the coarse material bite into her skin.
"I'm sorry," Henry said miserably, backing away. "He found out. I don't know how. He said he would kill my family."
"And so I would," Rahl drawled, his hands behind his back as he eyed Cara and Kahlan with amusement. For the first time, Cara really looked at Rahl. He looked the same, his hair still long and his expression still oily, though he wore an all-black robe instead of his customary red. But there was something different about him, something missing, something wrong. It made the hair on the back of Cara's neck stiffen, and she almost found it difficult to look at him. She shook her head angrily, trying to get rid of the feeling. "Henry here has been very helpful," Rahl continued. "For that, I will spare his family."
"Thank you, Lord Rahl," Henry said, his voice filled with relief.
"You're quite welcome," Rahl said, smiling graciously. "Yes, your family will be set free. You, on the other hand, have proved a traitor. You will need to die."
"But-Lord Rahl!" Henry exclaimed, even as two guards seized him. "Please!" he begged, but they were already dragging him away, his cries echoing along the dark walls of the keep.
Rahl chuckled. "I do love doing that." Then he raised an eyebrow at the two of them. "Come along, then."
The guards dragged Cara and Kahlan into an adjoining room. Cara shared one brief look with Kahlan, and she saw something she never thought she would see in Kahlan's eyes: the faint and ill-concealed hint of despair. It made Cara want to rip the arms off the men around her, but as soon as she tugged at one of them, she received a stinging blow to her face. Cara tasted blood thick in her mouth, and she memorized the face of the one who hit her, deciding he would be the first to die.
They had entered what appeared to be Rahl's throne room, though he had no subjects to attend him. A guard kicked Cara in the back of the knees, and she sank down until she was kneeling. Another guard did the same to Kahlan, and once again, Cara had to resist the urge to fight when she knew it was futile. Then, she saw Kahlan's eyes widen with fear, and she followed her gaze to see another soldier approaching carrying a Rada'Han. Instantly, Kahlan was surging up, managing to ram a shoulder into the stomach of one of the shoulders. Cara hoped fervently that Kahlan's movements would distract the soldiers guarding her, but there were three of them holding her tight, and one had a sword to her throat. She watched helplessly as two soldiers descended on Kahlan, the first ramming her in the stomach with the haft of his spear, the second slamming his fist down on the back of her neck. Kahlan choked and fell to her knees, and before she could rise again, the soldier had secured the Rada'Han around her neck.
"I'll kill you!" Kahlan spat at Rahl, her eyes flashing with anger and desperation. "So help me, I will. Where the hell is Erin?"
"Now, Kahlan," Rahl said, shaking his head. "Is that any way to speak to your host, and the man who has been tenderly caring for your child for months?"
"Did you hurt her?" Kahlan asked, ignoring his words. "If you hurt her, I'll-"
"You'll what?" Rahl asked, the amusement suddenly gone from his voice. "You'll yell at me? You'll have Cara yell at me? You two really came all this way, and all for nothing. Well," he mused, "not for nothing. It will certainly make it easier for me to bring Richard to his knees now that I have his daughter, his wife, and his pet Mord'Sith. Speaking of which, how are you, Cara? You don't look like you've changed much."
"Sorry I can't say the same," Cara drawled, her voice perfectly even. "I can't help but notice you seem a bit off. Weren't you dead the last time we saw you?"
Something flashed across Rahl's face, a mixture of anger and insecurity that Cara found promising. Then he schooled his face into a droll expression. "Yes, well, I've never been one to let a little death stand in my way-you should know that by now. Let's just say I made another deal with the Keeper. He was generous enough to give me a few extra powers that have come in handy, like moving great masses over great distances, building barriers, cloaking the presence of troops-that kind of thing."
"And what did you have to do for the Keeper in return?" Cara asked, and once again she saw Rahl's mask fall, and she almost thought she saw fear in his eyes before his face smoothed again. "That's neither here nor there," Rahl said dismissively, "and it really shouldn't be your most pressing concern. I would think you would be more worried about exactly what I'm going to do to you two."
"And what is that?" Kahlan asked, her voice raw with anger.
"You know, I haven't quite decided yet," Rahl said with a thin smile. "Though I suspect it will have something to do with the company of loyal Mord'Sith I keep around here. I'm sure they'd love to have another shot at the dreaded Cara Mason, and they'll be practically licking their lips at the prospect of breaking the Mother Confessor. I think after Gaiokos defeats Richard, I'll keep you two around, as a reminder of the good old days."
"That sounds terribly tedious, Rahl," Cara said, still keeping her tone light and mocking. "I remember you being more creative."
Rahl shrugged. "I see no reason to change a system that has worked for generations." Then he sighed, eyeing them almost mournfully. "I must admit, I had hoped Richard would come with you. The old Richard-the foolish, senseless Richard-would have. Perhaps my brother has finally learned some sense. More's the pity."
"Is that why you did this?" Kahlan asked, suddenly calm as she stared intently at Rahl. "For revenge against Richard?"
Rahl narrowed his eyes at Kahlan, his expression unreadable. Then he gave a small, mirthless smile; the expression did not even pretend to reach his eyes. "It's as good a reason as any, isn't it? He's the one who killed me-more than once, I might add. It seems only fair that he should suffer in turn."
"And you can't possibly fathom why he might have wanted you dead?" Cara asked, her voice saturated with scorn. For a moment, a genuine smile seemed to flash across Rahl's face.
"Ah, Cara, I have missed your sarcasm. Too bad it's your only weapon right now."
"Come a few steps closer and I'll show you just how unarmed I am," Cara growled. Rahl actually threw his head back and laughed, a harsh, alien sound that echoed off the high walls of the chamber, seeming to startle several of the guards. He let his laugh die down to a chuckle, shaking his head. "Yes, perhaps I'll keep you around for a while before I kill you-I forgot how much I miss having you nearby."
"I can't say the feeling is mutual," Cara retorted, jerking once again at the bonds around her wrists. One of the guards nudged her with his sword, and she glared up at him. If looks could kill, the guard would be at the bosom of the Keeper.
"Yes," Rahl continued, clasping his hands behind his back. "I suppose you could call it revenge. Or perhaps boredom. It seemed the thing to do, after all that hassle to come back to life. And Keeper knows it will be handy having a Confessor at my beck and call."
"We don't even know if Erin has Confessor powers," Kahlan interrupted.
"True, she has shown no abilities yet," Rahl admitted. "But she's only six-the power of many Confessors does not manifest until their teenage years. I'm a patient man, and trust me when I say I've got all the time in the world." Rahl turned away from them, taking the three steps to his throne. He turned again and sat on the black marble, letting his robes settle around him regally. Cara sneered; Rahl had always had a taste for the dramatic. Rahl leaned back against his chair, letting his arms rest on the arm rests as he eyed Kahlan and Cara. "I'm not a complete monster, though. She's been treated well-better than well, I dare say. We're beginning to form quite a bond. Soon she won't even miss you and Richard."
Cara glanced over at Kahlan to see her jaw clenched, her fingers curled into tight fists behind her back. "Is that your plan, then?" Kahlan gritted. "Hope she forgets us?"
Rahl shrugged. "She's no fool, despite having Richard as a father; I doubt she'll simply forget. But in time, she'll come to see me as her true guardian. I'm not the complete villain you make me out to be, you know. I'm perfectly capable of kindness."
"It's not kindness when you're doing it to force a child to do your will," Kahlan snapped.
"But isn't that what the Confessors have done for generations, Kahlan?" Rahl asked, lifting an eyebrow. "Forced little girls to do their will for the greater good? At least I make no pretense of nobility or divine purpose." Cara was tempted to side with Rahl on that point, though Kahlan didn't seem particularly convinced.
"It doesn't matter how nice you pretend to be; she won't forgive you for taking her away from her parents."
"Ah, but she might," Darken Rahl said, lifting a finger to stop Kahlan's words, "if her mother told her in her best interest to do as I say."
"And why would I do that?" Kahlan asked, narrowing her eyes.
"Because it is in her best interest," Rahl said simply, giving a small, indifferent shrug. "May I remind you that she thrives only so long as I say she should? I have all the power here-don't ever forget that. I told her long ago she would see her mother again, and so she shall. You'll speak to her, and you'll tell her exactly what I want you to, and there will be no need for you to test the bounds of my hospitality towards your daughter."
Cara could see the muscles of Kahlan's arms straining as she pulled against the ropes binding her, letting Rahl's threat hover in the air between them. Kahlan stared at Rahl with a look so full of hatred, Cara was surprised Rahl did not recoil from it. Perhaps it was a sign of his wrongness that he scarcely seemed to register Kahlan's expression.
A moment passed, and Kahlan swallowed. "Fine," she said, her voice hoarse, as if she had been yelling for days. "I'll tell her what you want. But it won't matter in the end. You'll fall just like you have every time in the past."
"Maybe," Rahl said, and his smile seemed almost sad. "But let's see how far I can get this time, shall we?" He turned to the guard standing closest to his throne. "Fetch the girl."
19
They waited in silence, Rahl the picture of languor as he lounged on his throne; Kahlan's whole body a study in tense anticipation. Rahl had ordered the guards to untie them, claiming he didn't want Erin to think he and her mother were on less than friendly terms. Cara had immediately begun to plan how she could take down the half dozen guards in the room, but Rahl read her mind before she could think beyond the first crippling blow.
"I wouldn't," he said pointedly. "The guards are really only for show-if I wanted to, I could kill you from where I sit. The Keeper, whatever its other faults, has been rather generous with his gifts this time around." Rahl shrugged. "Perhaps it was a bit dramatic of me to have the guards here in the first place, but I've always liked a bit of flair to my misdeeds." Cara had a retort ready for that, but then she heard a noise at the door and turned to see Erin enter.
She wore a muslin dress, red-not quite the deep, blood red of the Mord'Sith, but more the color of spilled summer wine before it sets on white cloth. Her dark hair, so wild and untamed the last time Cara had seen it, was captured in a tight braid that seemed to tug violently at the edges of her temples. She held herself stiffly, and there was a wariness in her eyes that Cara was too familiar with. She seemed older, somehow, though still unbearably young.
Accompanying her was a tall, sallow-faced woman wearing black leather with a band of red slashed across her chest. From the way she held herself, Cara could tell she was no Mord'Sith, though her face had some of the ingrained hardness of those women. The hand she rested on Erin's shoulder was strangely gentle, however, and Cara wondered for a moment whether this woman was a nurse or a jailor, finally deciding she was likely both.
Erin's gait was listless, her eyes dull as she first shuffled in. Cara suddenly felt a sharp stab of fear, a kind of feeling she had only had a few times in her life, that Erin wouldn't be the same; that Rahl had done to her what he had done to Cara; that the old Erin was gone, and in her place was something made by others. But then Erin lifted her gaze and saw Kahlan.
Her eyes-Richard's eyes-went wide, impossibly wide. And then she was tearing herself out from under the woman's hands, and she was running across the stone floor, her dress streaming out behind her like flames, and throwing herself into Kahlan's arms. Kahlan absorbed her weight, burying her face at her daughter's neck, and she sank to her knees so Erin could cling to her.
"Mama!" came Erin's muffled wail from where she clutched Kahlan, and Kahlan only responded with the sound, so familiar since childhood, of, "Shh. Shh."
No one else moved, and for a long moment there was no sound but Erin's hiccupping sobs and Kahlan's soothing noises. Cara shelved whatever emotions were feebly attempting to bother her in favor of assessing the room. Every face was stony, but that meant little among people trained to conceal every hint of emotion. She wondered why Rahl let this go on, knowing it could not be compassion that motivated him. Perhaps it was simple respect for a force even he wasn't able to conquer.
But it couldn't last, and after a moment, Rahl cleared his throat, lifting an eyebrow in expectation. Kahlan moved her face away from Erin's. Ignoring Rahl, she smiled at Erin and gently smoothed the hair at her temples that had come loose from her braid. "It's alright," she said, running her thumbs over Erin's cheeks and wiping away childish tears. "I'm here." Erin nodded, seemingly unable to tear her eyes away from Kahlan's face, as if afraid even a momentary distraction would lead to her disappearance. "Are you hurt?" Kahlan asked intently, scanning Erin for any visible signs of injury. "Did anyone hurt you?"
Erin shook her head mutely, and Rahl's voice came floating down from the dais. "Now why would she be hurt, Kahlan? That seems a foolish question to ask. We've taken perfectly good care of your daughter, just like we agreed, right?"
For the first time since that first painful, needy call, Erin spoke. "He…he said you and him and daddy were friends. He said you knew he was taking me, but that you and daddy were really busy somewhere else so you couldn't come too. He said you would see me soon, after we got to his palace."
Kahlan tore her gaze away from Erin's, and the look she cast Rahl over her daughter's shoulder was so full of hatred and rage that Cara could almost taste it. Then Kahlan's face smoothed, and she turned back to Erin, smiling. "Yes. Your father and I have known Rahl for a long time. I'm sorry for the confusion, sweetheart, but there was too much going on, and we didn't have time to see you before you had to come here."
Erin nodded, looking confused at this somewhat illogical explanation. But like all children, she trusted the words of her mother.
"See, Erin," Rahl said, his voice warm. "I told you you would see your mother again. And you will again soon, but right now she and I need to have a little talk."
For the second time, Kahlan tore her gaze away from Erin's face to look at Rahl. "So soon?" she asked, her tone pleasant on the surface, but Cara could hear the hard vein of anger running underneath it. "Don't you think we can spare a bit more time before our talk?"
"There will be plenty of time for you two to reconnect later," Rahl responded affably, his lips curling into a thin smile, "but we have much to discuss right now. Say your goodbyes."
Kahlan's jaw tightened, her eyes never leaving Rahl's. Then she closed her eyes, just for a moment. When she opened them, Cara saw a flicker of something like loss cut across her face, before her expression smoothed into nothing. Kahlan turned back to Erin. "Erin," she said softly, resting her hands gently on Erin's shoulders and meeting the girl's eyes. "Do you remember that day a year ago, the day you and John went to the stables and John fell in the horse trough? He was covered in muck, and the chief hostler must have spent ten minutes chasing him around the stable." The most tentative of smiles crept to Erin's face, and she nodded. Kahlan smiled back. "Do you remember what we talked about later that afternoon?" Erin's brow furrowed for a moment, but then her eyes widened with remembrance, and she nodded again. "Good," Kahlan said. And then she pulled Erin to her for a tight hug, whispering into her ear as she did so. When she pulled back, there was something empty in her eyes, but she gave Erin her best smile anyway.
"What was that about?" Rahl asked, his eyes narrowing as he regarded the two of them.
"Just saying goodbye," Kahlan said, staring at him defiantly. "Or did you want me to say everything in the hearing of all of these dear friends of mine?" And she gestured towards the semi-circle of grim guards.
Rahl chuckled. "No, I suppose a few things are best kept between a mother and her child." He looked at Erin. "Now Erin, why don't you come over here? Selma will take you back to your chamber while your mother and I speak."
Erin turned to face Rahl, and for a moment there was such a fierce look of defiance on her face that Cara couldn't help but grin, because it meant that all Rahl's powers had somehow failed to cow this willful little six-year-old. But then Rahl's expression hardened, and he said, "Erin-I said come over here." At his tone, some of Erin's fire seemed to leave her.
"It's alright, sweetheart," Kahlan said, pulling Erin to her for a final hug. "Just remember what I said, and everything will be fine."
"I don't want to go," Erin whispered, her arms clinging tightly around Kahlan's neck.
"I know," Kahlan said, squeezing Erin tight before letting her go. "But you need to be brave right now, like mommy and daddy, alright?"
At this reference to her parents' bravery, Erin's face drew into an expression of determination. She nodded one final time and then turned, walking towards Rahl's throne and up the three steps of his dais.
The whole time Cara had been observing Kahlan's reunion with Erin, the rest of her mind had been speeding through possible escape plans, calculating odds and rejecting impossibilities. She wasn't afraid of torture; she almost relished the idea of spitting in the face of the Mord'Sith who had the mistaken idea she could be rebroken. Then her mind flashed to Kahlan at the hands of the Mord'Sith, and her hands clenched into fists. Kahlan could take a good deal of torture, Cara was sure, but she was no Mord'Sith; she hadn't been raised on pain like Cara. With the Rada'Han around Kahlan's neck, she could do little unless armed. And if Rahl was telling the truth (which Cara believed he was), then he had enough magic to overpower Cara even if she managed to break free.
She knew that Richard would come, eventually; after defeating Rahl and Gaiokos, nothing would stop him until he found his wife and daughter. But there was no telling if they would be alive by then, and Cara did not particularly anticipate the thought of relying on Richard Cypher for rescuing. She would simply have to bide her time until she was given an opportunity alone with a few guards. She had overcome worse odds.
But then she glanced over at Kahlan, who had risen to her feet, her back straight and her gaze defiant. A flicker of torchlight glinted off the metal of the Rada'Han, and Cara's gaze flitted to each of the guards surrounding them as she envisioned how many more there must be within the keep. Just for a moment, she felt a flash of despair, before banishing the feeling and turning to look at Rahl.
Erin stood beside where he sat, their eyes almost at the same level. Rahl smiled at her magnanimously. "Very good, Erin. Now, why don't you run along with Selma."
Erin hesitated, her eyes darting towards Kahlan for just a moment before she swallowed hard. "I-I wanted to tell you something."
"Oh?" Rahl asked, lifting an eyebrow in a mixture of boredom and amusement. Erin nodded vigorously, and she let her hand rest on Rahl's shoulder, leaning in over the arm of the chair, as if to whisper a secret. Rahl cocked his head towards Erin, letting his lips curl up as he met Kahlan's eyes, as if taunting her with promises of the many secrets he and her daughter would share in the future. It was only when Erin was breaths away from him, and her hand had slipped from his shoulder to his throat, that Rahl's expression skittered from amusement to alarm.
But by then, it was too late.
*****
Cara didn't wait to see what happened next; she was already wrenching the spear from the hands of the nearest guard, bringing her foot down hard and hearing the satisfying snap of his kneecap separating from the ligaments that held it in place. The guard howled in pain, but Cara was now spinning to swipe the blade of the spear across the neck of the guard nearest to Kahlan, the thin red line across the guard's neck growing thicker with blood as the man crumpled to his knees. Kahlan gave Cara the briefest of looks, and then she was running towards the dais. Cara had no glance to spare that way, because the remaining three guards were converging on her. She swung the haft of the spear in a great loop, knocking the feet out from the foremost guard. He landed soundly, grunting as his body hit the hard stones. Cara deflected another guard's sword swing and found the gap her deflection made. She jammed the spear into the man's stomach, but it caught on his chain mail and she couldn't tug it free. Abandoning the spear, she rolled just in time to avoid the third guard's spearhead. She landed right by the fallen, winded guard, and without hesitation, brought her fist down hard on his throat, crushing his windpipe. She sprang to her feet, wrenching the knife out from the guard's sheath. She spun and threw the knife, hoping she had gained some of Kahlan's skills with daggers. The blade just knicked the side of the guard's face before spinning off and clattering against the far wall. Cara was preparing to face the man's spear with only her bare hands when the guard suddenly jerked, and his body flew across the room to land with a sickening crunch against the far wall.
Cara looked over towards the dais to see Rahl standing, his right arm outstretched. Kahlan was at his feet, kneeling over Erin's motionless body. The woman in black-Selma-lay in a heap at the foot of the dais. There was no visible sign of injury on her, but her open, sightless eyes told their own story. Cara tensed, ready to take whatever Rahl threw at her. But Rahl only scanned the room, ensuring there was no other danger, and then turned to stare down at Erin, his brow creased with worry. Cara blinked. She reached down and pulled the sword out of the dead grip of one of the guard, letting his arm flop limply to the ground, and stalked towards the dais.
Kahlan glanced up when Cara reached her, the lines of her face tight with worry. Cara's eyes darted towards Rahl, unable to shake off the feeling that he might attack at any moment, but Rahl had eyes only for the small child at his feet.
"Will she be alright?" Cara demanded, watching as Kahlan smoothed the dark hair at Erin's temple again and again.
"She'll be fine," Kahlan said, though her voice was strained. "It was her first true Confession-she's only drained from it. She needs rest, and food when she wakes up." Kahlan looked up at Rahl. "Do we need to be worried about more guards coming?"
"Not yet," Rahl said, shaking his head. "I have power over everyone in this keep, in one way or another; my mistress need have no fear of those here." Cara stared at Rahl. There was something unreal, something deeply wrong, in hearing Darken Rahl refer to anyone as his mistress, particularly the six-year-old daughter of Richard Cypher. "I will make sure none come near her. In the meantime, I should show you to her chambers. She can rest there, and I can have food brought."
Kahlan looked as if she wanted nothing more than to plunge Cara's sword into Rahl's chest, but she gritted her teeth, recognizing necessity. "Fine. Take us there."
Kahlan scooped Erin up in her arms, giving Rahl a single, cutting glare when he made a motion to help. Then she and Cara followed Rahl through one of the side doors, down an empty corridor, and to the entrance to a heavy iron door.
Rahl opened the door, and they were met by a ghastly room. It had clearly once been the chamber of a soldier, made for size and practicality, not comfort. Someone had attempted to make it more fit for a child by bedecking the large four-poster bed with a pink canopy, and populating the room with a few similarly shaded pillows. A few toys were stacked neatly against one stone wall, while a large oval rug covered in forest scenes dominated the center of the room. The effect was altogether garish, the artificial cheer at sharp odds with the utilitarian structure of the room. Kahlan paused for a moment on the threshold, taking in the room. Her jaw worked, once, and then she pushed the rest of the way into the room, laying Erin gently on the surface of the bed.
She turned to face Rahl. "The key?" she demanded, holding out her hand. Rahl lifted an eyebrow, but he reached into his robe and handed Kahlan the key to the Rada'Han. Instantly, Kahlan had unlocked the device, letting it clatter to the ground. She addressed Rahl again. "Do what you need to do to keep Erin safe-and remember that, if she were awake, she would likely ask you to do what I tell you to do."
Rahl smiled at that, and for a moment he seemed like his old self. "You know I will do everything in my power to protect the Confessor, and I shall take your words under advisement. But I think I shall wait to see what Erin has to say before I begin taking orders from you."
Kahlan's eyes narrowed, and Cara had a hard time resisting the urge to snap Rahl's neck. But Rahl only dipped his head and turned to leave.
"And see if you can find my agiels while you're gone," Cara called after him, her own tone mocking. Rahl paused for a moment, his back to her, and then he passed through the door, shutting it gently behind him.
Kahlan seated herself beside Erin, whose wan face was pinched, as if she was having a particularly difficult dream. With great care, Kahlan reached down and undid the tie holding Erin's braid together. Gently, she began to comb her fingers through the thick hair, slowly unwinding the braids from each other. In a few moments, Erin's hair was free, fanned out around her face and shoulders. It softened her face, making her look younger. Kahlan let the back of her hand brush against Erin's cheek, and then she looked up to meet Cara's eyes. When she spoke, her voice sounded raw, and lost. "I wish there had been another way."
"And I wish Rahl had stayed dead the first time, or even the second," Cara responded, her voice brisk, though there was the slightest hint of softness underlying it. "There's no use in wishing for what can't be. If Erin hadn't Confessed him, we'd probably be enjoying quarters in his dungeons right now."
Kahlan shook her head. "Maybe. But think of what would have happened if I had guessed wrong-if she hadn't been able to Confess him? And…" she drew in a deep breath, "how is what I had her do any different from…from what my father did to me?"
Briefly, Cara considered slapping Kahlan. Instead she rolled her eyes. "Don't be an idiot, Kahlan. Really, your and Richard's need to blame yourself for everyone else's problems is bordering on ridiculous. What you did was nothing like what your father did; he used you, over and over, for his own gain. You had Erin use her powers-once-to prevent something far worse. Don't make a martyr out of yourself; it hardly suits you."
"I'm not…" Kahlan began, gritting her teeth and glaring at Cara, "I'm not making a martyr of myself. But…I didn't want her to have to do this, not like this. How can she recover from that?"
Cara shrugged. "How did either of us recover? "
"You didn't," Kahlan said bluntly. "You murdered and tortured people for years."
Cara smirked. "Well, yes. But the Mord'Sith trained me for years and years. And I got better, sort of." Kahlan snorted dubiously. "Your father controlled you for a long time, yet look how you turned out-the Mother Confessor, Mistress of Right." Cara's tone was sarcastic, but she also met Kahlan's eyes evenly, willing her to listen. "Children learn to recover-you know this. What's a few months in a child's life? And what's one Confession? Because of it, you have all the time in the world to make sure it's only a bad memory, one day."
Kahlan was silent, meeting Cara's eyes before she let her gaze drift towards the unconscious form beside her. "I hope you're right," she said softly.
*****
When Rahl returned, he held a platter of food in one hand and Cara's agiels in the other.
Cara moved towards him eagerly, nearly snatching the weapons out of his hands. He seemed about to make a snide comment, but then Erin made some small noise and he nearly flowed to her side, Cara utterly forgotten. Cara strapped her agiels to her side, feeling some piece of her restored as their pain bit into her sharply before settling down to a constant throb.
She turned to look at Erin, but the girl still hadn't opened her eyes. Kahlan examined the food Rahl brought, frowning. "She'll need tea-it will help restore her. Do you have any Majorim root?"
Rahl furrowed his brow. "Perhaps. I will check the kitchens." He left once more, and for a moment Cara wished he would regain his senses just so she could enjoy the look of horror on his face as he realized he had become the errand boy of the Mother Confessor and her daughter.
Just then, she heard a little mutter from the bed and Erin opened her eyes. She blinked into the dim torchlight, her eyes focusing on Kahlan's face. "Mama?" she said querulously, and Kahlan smiled wide as Cara had ever seen. Quietly, Cara moved to the far side of the room, trying to pretend she was utterly absorbed in the stark red tapestry that was the far wall's only decoration. She could hear the murmur of Kahlan and Erin speaking, but she chose not to focus on the words.
Several minutes later, she heard the door swing open and she spun, her hands resting on the handles of her agiels. But it was only Rahl, carrying a teapot and some green herbs. His eyes lit up when he saw that Erin was awake, and he rushed to the side of the bed, ignoring Kahlan's admonishing glare. "Mistress, you're awake!" he said in relief.
Erin's eyes darted towards Kahlan, her look unsure. Cara assumed Kahlan had explained everything to Erin, but she could imagine the child's disorientation at having Darken Rahl at her beck and call. Erin swallowed, and in a voice that started quietly but grew steadily stronger, she said, "I want you to do what mama and Mistress Cara tell you to do, ok?"
"As you wish, mistress," Rahl answered eagerly, dipping his head in acquiescence. Cara grinned, having sudden visions of the things she could order Rahl to do. But then her mind snapped immediately to the more pressing issue, now that Erin was secure and she and Kahlan out of immediate danger. Richard was still fighting Rahl and Gaiokos's forces in the Midlands, and Rahl was the only one who knew how to call those troops back.
She glanced at Kahlan. "We need to contact Richard," Cara said. "And if Rahl can help against Gaiokos's troops-"
"Go," Kahlan said immediately, her expression firm. "We'll be fine here-right?" she continued, addressing Rahl.
"Yes," Rahl responded, nodding confidently. "Nothing occurs here that I don't know about; no one acts against my will. I doubt there is a safer place in all of the Old Kingdom and D'Hara together."
As much as it went against Cara's instincts to trust Rahl, she knew he was right at the moment. "Take me to your Seer's Tower," she said. Casting one last look at Kahlan, she followed Rahl out the door.
20
After that, things moved quickly.
Rahl led Cara to the Seer's Tower, showing her where to find the necessary powders to fill the braziers. When Rahl showed no interest in leaving the room, Cara lifted an expectant eyebrow. Rahl shrugged. "Fine. But do say hello to my dear brother for me."
Cara grunted noncommittally, and Rahl left the room. Cara spoke the incantation, waiting impatiently for the young guard at the People's Palace to recover from his shock and summon Richard. When Richard entered, he seemed hard and distracted. His hair had grown long and shaggy, much like it had that first year Cara knew him, and again during the first war with Rahl. He wore the chain mail the metalworkers at Aydindril had designed specifically for him, its breastplate looped with subtle but practical designs. There were dark spots on the metal, red flecks that spoke of its recent use. Clearly the guard hadn't informed Richard of who was on the other end of the fire, as he seemed merely irritated when he first entered. But the moment he saw Cara, his eyes widened. "Cara!" he exclaimed, taking a step forward and reaching out a hand, as if he could actually touch her. "Where are you? Where's Kahlan? Did you find Erin?"
"Good to see you too, my Lord," Cara drawled, but at the desperation in his eyes, she relented and began speaking. She watched as his face registered each new revelation-lit with the knowledge Erin was safe, shuttered with the knowledge that Erin had Confessed Rahl.
"She's fine, then? Truly?" he asked finally, hope and doubt in every syllable.
Cara felt an uncharacteristic softening towards Richard; for once, she decided to humor her weaker instincts. "Yes, Richard, she'll be fine," Cara said firmly, her voice almost gentle. "She's with Kahlan now, but I'm sure she'll want to see you soon."
Richard nodded vigorously, a grin working its way to his face. Then he shook his head and his expression became serious. "So what can you tell me about Gaiokos's defenses?"
After that, there came the long plotting of how to systematically destroy Gaiokos's army. Cara deigned to let Rahl reenter the room to participate in the discussions. Rahl joined Cara in the middle of the mage circle, speaking his own matching incantation. Cara saw Richard's jaw tense when Rahl first appeared. "Brother," Rahl said, smiling wryly.
"Rahl," Richard answered, expressionless. Whatever emotions he was feeling, he tamped down in favor of tactical planning.
According to Rahl, transporting troops took enormous magic and not a small amount of time. It had been the work of months to deposit those first troops at the doorsteps of the People's Palace, Aydindril, and the Southern Keep, and it had left him drained for weeks. To reverse the process-to snap back every invading soldier still left in D'Hara and the Midlands-would take weeks, and it could not be done in one fell swoop. They began to plan out the most strategic method of removing troops, the method most likely to cause chaos among Gaiokos's army. They would start with the larger force outside the People's Palace, removing as many troops as Rahl could reasonably manage. Then they would bite into the troops at Aydindril, then the Southern Keep. There had been losses on both sides, according to Richard, though the native forces were holding their own. Had Rahl succeeded in transporting another three regiments, however, the sides might not have been so easily matched.
Later, Kahlan joined in the strategic discussions. Cara wasn't there the first time she and Erin saw Richard in the mage flames, but she was waiting outside when Kahlan exited the room. Cara was leaning against the wall, having spent the past ten minutes pacing up and down the hallway. She took a step towards Kahlan, then stopped, not sure what she was planning to do. Kahlan's face was drawn and tired, but calm. She gave Cara a faint smile, and then a shrug. "It's hard to say much when you're hundreds of miles away. Erin was glad to see him." She looked down at where Erin clasped her hand. The child had recovered fully from the strain of her first Confession, though it was hard to tell how she fared beyond the physical. She had always been a talkative child, rambling at length in a way Cara had always found headache-inducing. She was quieter now, and her eyes took in everything. But it had only been two days since Kahlan's arrival, and Cara did not particularly like the idea of trying to assess the inner workings of a child's mind.
Kahlan rarely let Erin out of her sight now, despite Rahl's repeated protestations that Erin could hardly find a safer place in the land. And, indeed, Rahl did seem to have an unnatural control over the people of the Keep. Rahl explained that he had performed a bonding spell with every member of the Keep, a kind of spell similar but far more powerful than the Spell of Binding Cara had performed years ago at Lastings. In many ways, the spell resembled the magic of Confession, demanding strict obedience from those under its thrall. In the end, Cara didn't much care for the details of the thing; once convinced of their safety, she turned her mind to practical matters.
There arose the question of where to put the troops Rahl removed; according to him, he could deposit them anywhere they chose, though the farther away the location, the more power it drained from him. Cara suggested the middle of the Bamoric Sea, but both Richard and Kahlan had blanched at the idea. And though Cara called them insufferably soft-hearted, some part of her had to admit that drowning in the ocean-amid the flailing limbs of your soldiers-at-arms, bewildered and choking on salt water-was no way to die.
In the end, they chose the icy plains to the south of Rahl's Keep and the Inlit Deserts to the east. It wasn't a death sentence; most would survive. But it would be a warning that next time, enemies of the north would not be so lucky. Gaiokos, however, would go nowhere; he was Richard's.
After all had been settled, there was nothing to do but wait.
*****
Cara did not enjoy waiting.
Her short scuffle with Rahl's guards seemed insufficient reward for months of bloodless travel. She wanted nothing more than to test her agiels out on some impertinent minion of Rahl's, but all the inhabitants of the Keep seemed to be doing their best to avoid her. The thought of Richard back in D'Hara, no doubt tossed into battle after battle, made Cara irrationally angry. The dark walls of the Keep seemed to press down on her, and she found herself pacing the narrow corridors like a caged animal, unconsciously clasping and unclasping the handles of her agiels.
Within a few days, she had explored every inch of the keep. She felt a moment of hope when she came across the quarters of the company of loyal Mord'Sith Rahl kept housed at the keep. She recognized one or two of them from the war, and they all knew who she was. They watched her warily as she circled the central Mord'Sith chamber, appraising the chains hanging from the ceilings, lightly running her fingers over the sharp blades and agiels and cutting devices arrayed neatly on the stone table nearby. She suspected she would have found Henry Peddlar hanging from the chains, skin a mottled red and black, had Kahlan not commanded that Rahl set him free. She turned to face the Mord'Sith, a challenging turn to her lips.
"Would any of you care for a practice bout? I imagine some of you may have…unfinished business with me."
One Mord'Sith spoke, a blond woman with cool, calculating eyes, and Cara thought she recognized that voice; Rahl had held favorites among the Mord'Sith (Cara had once been one, she sometimes forgot). "The Lord Rahl has forbidden us to harm you or the Confessor," the woman said, and Cara thought she detected a smug tone to the woman's voice. Cara scowled and bit back a curse. She had the sneaking suspicion that Rahl had made that order not to protect Cara, but to prevent her from having any contact with this company. Rahl, though utterly and unquestionably devoted to Erin, had shown not unexpected creativity in choosing how he followed Kahlan and Cara's orders. Cara briefly considered asking Rahl to release his injunction on some of the Mord'Sith, but she couldn't bring herself to ask him for anything, even if it was for him to allow his Mord'Sith to hurt her.
Cara briefly debated whether to beat the life out of the impertinent Mord'Sith, or perhaps toss her off the parapet to the stone flagons below. Then she controlled herself and stilled her expression into one of haughty disinterest. "Ah. Pity. I would have enjoyed beating you all-again." She turned then, without noting the expressions on the women's faces. She felt a brief surge of satisfaction, but it faded quickly; she was still humming with unspent energy.
Cara considered asking Kahlan to spar, but Kahlan was frequently busy consulting with those running Aydindril in her absence, and spent the rest of her time with Erin. Cara herself spent long hours every day running tactics with Grayson, Besdick, and Amista, as well as discussing the schedule for Rahl's troop extraction. There was a time when she would have found this work tedious, but now she craved it; her only regret was that she couldn't be in the midst of it, commanding troops and putting her agiels to good use.
Cara growled as she stalked back to her chambers, cursing truculent Mord'Sith and conniving lords. Her chambers lay near the center of the keep, adjoined to Kahlan and Erin's. At Kahlan's instructions, Rahl had spelled the rooms so only Erin, Kahlan, or Cara could open them, a precaution Rahl bluntly called unnecessary. Secretly, Cara agreed-there was hardly a time when Erin wasn't within sight of either Cara or Kahlan-but she also knew the spell was the only way Kahlan was willing to leave Erin in her chambers while she took meetings in the Seer's tower. The rooms weren't half bad, and certainly superior to travesty of Erin's old room. They even led out to the private courtyard Rahl had installed at the center of the keep. At the thought of this courtyard, Cara felt a sudden flash of inspiration. If she couldn't spar with someone else, at least she could keep herself in shape.
Cara stepped out into the courtyard and breathed in deeply, smelling cedar and summer grass. The courtyard was large, with a circular area of stone ringed by trees, shrubs, and wildflowers. Frankly, it felt entirely out of place, completely counter to the sinister feeling of the keep. Not for the first time, Cara wondered why Rahl had decided to have it built, but she didn't wonder enough to ask.
Cara rolled her neck, working out the kinks. She swung her arms, already feeling the fresh air work upon her and sweep away the tendrils of malaise that seemed to breathe from the dark walls of the keep. Cara drew a breath through her nose and drew her agiels, the pain sparking through her fingers, shooting down to her feet and through her chest, sending her head buzzing with comforting pain. She made a few experimental swings, warming up, and then she fell to it, thrusting, parrying, and generally bludgeoning her invisible opponents to death. After an hour, she began to feel her muscles begin to ache, and she greeted the feeling with relief.
It wasn't until a half hour later that Cara noticed she wasn't alone.
She stilled her last swing, her breathing slightly labored, and turned to stare at Erin. The girl was tucked amid the roots of one of the trees lining the courtyard like a young spring flower. When Cara looked her way, she started guiltily, but she didn't move.
"Well?" Cara said, cocking an eyebrow. "Are you going to come over here?"
Erin froze, and then she was scrambling to her feet, walking towards Cara and pausing a couple of feet away. She wore the simple brown dress Kahlan had dug up from somewhere in the keep, and her hair was pulled back loosely by a tie. She stood staring at Cara, seemingly unsure what to say. Cara sighed, resisting the urge to cross her arms and glare at the girl, as she would an errant soldier. "Why are you watching me?"
Erin swallowed, but then that look of determination entered her eyes. "Can you…can you show me how to do that?"
Cara frowned, eyeing the girl narrowly. She knew this could go terribly wrong, and she wasn't entirely sure Kahlan would approve. But she also knew what she would have wanted, at Erin's age, so she made a decision. "Show me a fist," she commanded curtly. Erin blinked, but then she curled her fingers into a ball, holding her hand up for Cara to inspect. Cara nodded in approval; at least the girl knew not to tuck her thumb in. "Good. Now let me see you punch." Cara held out her hand, palm out. To her credit, Erin only hesitated a moment before she reeled back her arm and swung at Cara. Her fist hit Cara's palm and rebounded; Cara's palm didn't move. Cara frowned. The girl's punch had the force of a wet noodle, but she supposed that wasn't entirely unexpected. Cara shook her head. "Not like that. Don't swing your arm back all the way-your opponent will see it coming for miles. Punch from the waist, or from a fighting position. It's faster."
Cara showed Erin a fighting stance, shifting the girl's feet and watching as her punches gradually became slightly less pathetic. "Better," Cara finally said. "Now what about kicking? Has anyone showed you where you should kick a man?" Erin hesitated, but then she pointed towards Cara's crotch. Cara grinned. "Good. Your education has not been entirely useless. But not every opponent will be a man." She then proceeded to show Erin all the sensitive spots the girl could reach-the instep, the knee, the floating ribs. She concluded by bluntly saying, "And if you can reach it, the eyes are always a good place to strike-anything soft usually is." Erin nodded seriously, her hands resting loosely at her sides, though they were still balled into fists. "That's enough, I think," Cara said firmly. "Practice that."
Erin nodded, her eyes bright. She took a few steps away from Cara and began practicing her punches and kicks. Cara watched her for a moment. There was much flailing of uncoordinated limbs, but the girl did seem to get the gist of what Cara had told her. Cara shrugged and resumed her own exercises.
The next day when Cara entered the courtyard at the same time as the day before, Erin was already there. Cara sighed, but then resigned herself and waved for Erin to approach. Erin practically skipped over to Cara, clearly trying to look serious and stoic, all the while fighting a smile. Her seriousness became real enough, however, once Cara began instructing her again. They reviewed the previous day's material, and then Cara began to show Erin some footwork that any half-decent fighter needed to know. Watching Erin, Cara had to keep reminding herself that most children did not receive the early training she and her Mord'Sith sisters had. Erin was, after all, rather young.
They kept this up for two more days, during the time when Kahlan was usually conferring with Aydindril. On the fifth day, Cara decided to show Erin locks and breaks. She positioned Erin in front of her and wrapped her hand around Erin's wrist. Her hand more than fit, her fingers overlapping the thumb by an inch. "Now how would you get out?" Cara asked matter-of-factly. Erin's brow furrowed. Then, without warning, she kicked towards Cara's shins. Cara saw the movement and managed to shift her weight, but not before Erin had delivered a kick that might leave the minutest of bruises. Cara grinned. "Good. But you're still in my grip, and someone grabbing you probably won't be standing still. Try again." This time, Erin tugged at Cara's arm, clearly straining as she tried to make the woman move; Cara didn't budge.
"Stop," Cara finally said, sighing. "You are very tiny. I am not. Yanking on me will clearly never work." Erin scowled, something of Kahlan's stubbornness shining through her eyes, and Cara felt her lips twitch. "Now you grab my wrist." She held out her wrist for Erin to grab, and the girl dutifully wrapped her fingers around Cara's arm, the tips of her fingers just touching her thumb. "Now," Cara began. "I could pull away from you, but you're expecting that, so you'll tense up and pull in the opposite direction. Instead, use the momentum of the other person." With that, she thrust her arm out in the direction Erin was already pulling, fast as a snake, breaking free of the grasp before whipping her fist around to hover a half an inch from Erin's nose. Erin blinked. "Do you see?" Cara said, lowering her arm. "Sometimes you have to use your opponent's own force, especially when they're stronger than you. Now you try."
They spent some time on the most basic grabs, and gradually Erin began to understand the idea of moving with her opponent, not against her. After Cara felt they had worked long enough, she held up her hand for Erin to stop. She eyed Erin carefully, noticing the color of her cheeks, the brightness of her eyes. She seemed more alive than she had in days, almost like her old self. Perhaps she would have even talked more if she didn't seem mildly enamored of Cara's own taciturn stylings, as if it were some ritualistic aspect of her training regimen. Cara chose her next words carefully.
"That's an important lesson to learn-when to submit to an opponent." She was about to say it was something she had learned from the Mord'Sith-yielding to the more powerful-but decided that might send the wrong message. "You will not always be the strongest. In fact, it will probably be a very long time until you are the strongest. Waiting until you are more powerful is not weakness; it's strategy."
Erin was listening intently, her expression serious, though not completely comprehending. Cara had the sudden, somewhat unpleasant feeling that she was performing the functions of a schoolmarm. Sighing, she crouched down so she was eye-level with Erin. She met Erin's brown eyes, putting force into her words. "It's like the locks-sometimes you'll meet someone with a stronger grip. Sometimes you can't break out, even when you try every strategy you know, even when use their own force against them. So you wait. Sometimes you find a chance to get free; sometimes someone else does it for you. You do what you can to survive. Do you understand?"
Erin's brow furrowed, her expression a mixture of doubt and uneasy hope. She hesitated before speaking. "Mama told me not to tell anyone about the Confession? So I didn't, even though Darken-I mean Rahl-wanted me to."
"I know," Cara said briskly. "You waited. That was smart."
"He was nice," Erin said, scrunching up her face in confusion, "but I didn't like him. I know I was supposed to be brave, like mama and papa, but he was…he was scary. Not like now."
"That's smart too," Cara said coolly. "There's nothing wrong with being afraid when you're clearly outmatched."
"Are you ever afraid?" Erin asked, her expression curious.
"No," Cara said haughtily, rising to her feet. "I'm never outmatched."
At Cara's words, a small giggle escaped Erin's lips before she clapped both hands over her mouth, her eyes going wide as she stared at Cara. Cara had to turn her back so Erin wouldn't see her smile. That's when she saw Kahlan standing off to the side, leaning against a tree as she observed them.
Cara kept her face still. "Kahlan," she said evenly.
"Cara," Kahlan answered smoothly. She addressed Erin, her voice warm. "Sweetheart, why don't you run inside? Cara and I need to talk."
Erin nodded, casting a quick glance Cara's way before heading towards the door. Kahlan pushed herself off the tree and approached Cara. Cara waited, her body slightly tense.
"What are you doing?" Kahlan asked. Her voice wasn't exactly accusing; it was almost curious.
Cara shrugged. "Teaching her how to fight."
"Why?" Kahlan asked, a certain brittleness buzzing at the edge of her words. "She doesn't need to fight now, not yet. Not now that I'm here."
"Do you think that matters?" Cara snapped, her eyes hard as she stared at Kahlan. "You should know as well as anyone that you can't predict what happens to you as a child. And it's not about defending herself-the girl has the heft of invalid goat. It's about her knowing she has power if she needs it."
"Do you think you know my daughter better than I do?" Kahlan asked, the danger clear in the way she held herself.
"No," Cara said quietly. "But I know what it's like to be raised by Mord'Sith between Darken Rahl's walls."
"It's not the same," Kahlan spat. There was anger in her tone, but also a vein of desperation. "She wasn't raised by them-she was raised by me and Richard. Rahl didn't treat her like one of…one of them."
"I know," Cara said calmly. "And that's why she'll recover. But that doesn't mean she doesn't need to feel like she's regained her power." Cara paused, looking down at her side and watching her fingers curl and uncurl around the handle of her agiel. If it weren't for the pleasant pain coursing through her, she might have thought they were someone else's hands. She swallowed and made her voice empty. "The moment I regained my power was the moment I first used my agiel against one of the women who used it on me." She looked up again, meeting Kahlan's gaze defiantly. "She should learn how to defend herself."
Kahlan stared back at Cara, and then she closed her eyes. Her body seemed to deflate, to sink in on itself. She opened your eyes. "You're right," she said softly. "I was going to teach her dagger lessons in a couple of years anyway. I always wanted her to be able to defend herself, to know she could. I just…" Kahlan sighed, shaking her head ruefully. "I want to protect her, even though I know there's only so much I can do. Perhaps I'm trying to shield her unnecessarily. Perhaps I'm overreacting."
"Do you think?" Cara asked.
Kahlan glared at her. "I think my caution is somewhat justified, considering the circumstances-don't you?" Cara only shrugged and smirked in return. "So," Kahlan said resignedly, "how does my daughter fare against the dreaded Cara Mason?"
"Well, she punches like a six-year-old girl," Cara said bluntly, and Kahlan laughed. The sound echoed off the walls of the courtyard, as if it belonged there.
*****
The next day, Kahlan joined them in the courtyard. She wore her brown traveling garments, and she carried her daggers. Erin's eyes lit up when she saw Kahlan. Kahlan glanced at Cara, lifting an eyebrow. "Erin, would you like to see some real fighting?"
Erin nodded eagerly, a grin stretching her face. Cara cracked her neck and drew her agiels, hearing their whisper and barely repressing her own grin of anticipation. She and Kahlan circled each other warily, each watching the other's steps. They had sparred during their journey, as they had throughout the years before. Every time they did, Cara felt she learned something new about the way Kahlan moved.
She noticed a slight shift in Kahlan's stance just before Kahlan lunged at her. Then they were at it, agiels and daggers dipping and spinning, feet moving too fast to follow, eyes watching every slight movement. Cara felt her heart begin to race, and she couldn't hold back the fierce smile that broke out on her face. This was what she needed; this was what she had needed for a long time.
They were evenly matched, so evenly matched that neither managed to land a solid blow. Finally, they broke apart, both breathing heavily. Cara could feel the sweat at the nape of her neck and the small of her back, and the ache in her calves that signaled a good bout.
"Enough?" Kahlan asked, lifting an eyebrow.
"For now," Cara agreed with a nod, sheathing her agiels. She turned to see Erin staring at them from her perch on a bench, her eyes wide as could be.
"Well?" Cara asked in amusement. "What did you think?"
"It was good," Erin said, nodding vigorously. "Really good. Will I be able to do that?"
"No," Cara said immediately, and then sighed when she saw Kahlan's following scowl. "Maybe. With lots of practice. Lots of practice."
Erin was still nodding, as if her neck belonged to one of those bobble toys the street vendors in Aydindril sold.
"So," Kahlan said to Erin, wiping her daggers on her dress before sheathing them. "Who do you think won?"
Erin's eyes, impossibly enough, went even wider as she glanced back and forth between Kahlan and Cara. "The truth?"
"Always," Kahlan said firmly, though Cara heard the amusement underlying her tone. Erin hesitated, her eyes shifting between the two of them, and then she lifted up a finger and pointed towards Cara.
"You traitor!" Kahlan exclaimed indignantly, glaring at Erin. "Your own flesh and blood, and you choose Cara!" Erin grinned unapologetically, and Kahlan swooped down on her. "You'll pay for that!" she announced, and then she began to tickle Erin relentlessly until the girl was nothing but a giggling mess on the stones of the courtyard. Cara watched them, trying to hold back a smile. But here, in this courtyard that was nowhere that was real, she thought that maybe she didn't need to hold it back.
Part 8
Fandom: Legend of the Seeker
Pairing: Cara/Kahlan
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 67,000
Summary: Years after they sealed the rift, Cara discovers that being a hero isn't all it's cracked up to be, and Kahlan discovers that Cara still makes things complicated.
18
"You son of a bitch," Cara hissed, lunging at Henry. The man barely avoided her blow, and then there were a half-dozen soldiers surrounding her. Cara kicked at one soldier, hearing his howl as his kneecap snapped. She reached to draw her agiels, but she suddenly felt a blinding pain in the back of her neck and sank to her knees. Before she could rise again, she felt her arms grabbed roughly, and she was yanked to her feet by several of the soldiers. She realized a second company had come down the hallway behind them. She saw Kahlan being held the same way, overcome before she could Confess any of them. Quickly, the soldiers bound their arms with rope, yanking tight enough for Cara to feel the coarse material bite into her skin.
"I'm sorry," Henry said miserably, backing away. "He found out. I don't know how. He said he would kill my family."
"And so I would," Rahl drawled, his hands behind his back as he eyed Cara and Kahlan with amusement. For the first time, Cara really looked at Rahl. He looked the same, his hair still long and his expression still oily, though he wore an all-black robe instead of his customary red. But there was something different about him, something missing, something wrong. It made the hair on the back of Cara's neck stiffen, and she almost found it difficult to look at him. She shook her head angrily, trying to get rid of the feeling. "Henry here has been very helpful," Rahl continued. "For that, I will spare his family."
"Thank you, Lord Rahl," Henry said, his voice filled with relief.
"You're quite welcome," Rahl said, smiling graciously. "Yes, your family will be set free. You, on the other hand, have proved a traitor. You will need to die."
"But-Lord Rahl!" Henry exclaimed, even as two guards seized him. "Please!" he begged, but they were already dragging him away, his cries echoing along the dark walls of the keep.
Rahl chuckled. "I do love doing that." Then he raised an eyebrow at the two of them. "Come along, then."
The guards dragged Cara and Kahlan into an adjoining room. Cara shared one brief look with Kahlan, and she saw something she never thought she would see in Kahlan's eyes: the faint and ill-concealed hint of despair. It made Cara want to rip the arms off the men around her, but as soon as she tugged at one of them, she received a stinging blow to her face. Cara tasted blood thick in her mouth, and she memorized the face of the one who hit her, deciding he would be the first to die.
They had entered what appeared to be Rahl's throne room, though he had no subjects to attend him. A guard kicked Cara in the back of the knees, and she sank down until she was kneeling. Another guard did the same to Kahlan, and once again, Cara had to resist the urge to fight when she knew it was futile. Then, she saw Kahlan's eyes widen with fear, and she followed her gaze to see another soldier approaching carrying a Rada'Han. Instantly, Kahlan was surging up, managing to ram a shoulder into the stomach of one of the shoulders. Cara hoped fervently that Kahlan's movements would distract the soldiers guarding her, but there were three of them holding her tight, and one had a sword to her throat. She watched helplessly as two soldiers descended on Kahlan, the first ramming her in the stomach with the haft of his spear, the second slamming his fist down on the back of her neck. Kahlan choked and fell to her knees, and before she could rise again, the soldier had secured the Rada'Han around her neck.
"I'll kill you!" Kahlan spat at Rahl, her eyes flashing with anger and desperation. "So help me, I will. Where the hell is Erin?"
"Now, Kahlan," Rahl said, shaking his head. "Is that any way to speak to your host, and the man who has been tenderly caring for your child for months?"
"Did you hurt her?" Kahlan asked, ignoring his words. "If you hurt her, I'll-"
"You'll what?" Rahl asked, the amusement suddenly gone from his voice. "You'll yell at me? You'll have Cara yell at me? You two really came all this way, and all for nothing. Well," he mused, "not for nothing. It will certainly make it easier for me to bring Richard to his knees now that I have his daughter, his wife, and his pet Mord'Sith. Speaking of which, how are you, Cara? You don't look like you've changed much."
"Sorry I can't say the same," Cara drawled, her voice perfectly even. "I can't help but notice you seem a bit off. Weren't you dead the last time we saw you?"
Something flashed across Rahl's face, a mixture of anger and insecurity that Cara found promising. Then he schooled his face into a droll expression. "Yes, well, I've never been one to let a little death stand in my way-you should know that by now. Let's just say I made another deal with the Keeper. He was generous enough to give me a few extra powers that have come in handy, like moving great masses over great distances, building barriers, cloaking the presence of troops-that kind of thing."
"And what did you have to do for the Keeper in return?" Cara asked, and once again she saw Rahl's mask fall, and she almost thought she saw fear in his eyes before his face smoothed again. "That's neither here nor there," Rahl said dismissively, "and it really shouldn't be your most pressing concern. I would think you would be more worried about exactly what I'm going to do to you two."
"And what is that?" Kahlan asked, her voice raw with anger.
"You know, I haven't quite decided yet," Rahl said with a thin smile. "Though I suspect it will have something to do with the company of loyal Mord'Sith I keep around here. I'm sure they'd love to have another shot at the dreaded Cara Mason, and they'll be practically licking their lips at the prospect of breaking the Mother Confessor. I think after Gaiokos defeats Richard, I'll keep you two around, as a reminder of the good old days."
"That sounds terribly tedious, Rahl," Cara said, still keeping her tone light and mocking. "I remember you being more creative."
Rahl shrugged. "I see no reason to change a system that has worked for generations." Then he sighed, eyeing them almost mournfully. "I must admit, I had hoped Richard would come with you. The old Richard-the foolish, senseless Richard-would have. Perhaps my brother has finally learned some sense. More's the pity."
"Is that why you did this?" Kahlan asked, suddenly calm as she stared intently at Rahl. "For revenge against Richard?"
Rahl narrowed his eyes at Kahlan, his expression unreadable. Then he gave a small, mirthless smile; the expression did not even pretend to reach his eyes. "It's as good a reason as any, isn't it? He's the one who killed me-more than once, I might add. It seems only fair that he should suffer in turn."
"And you can't possibly fathom why he might have wanted you dead?" Cara asked, her voice saturated with scorn. For a moment, a genuine smile seemed to flash across Rahl's face.
"Ah, Cara, I have missed your sarcasm. Too bad it's your only weapon right now."
"Come a few steps closer and I'll show you just how unarmed I am," Cara growled. Rahl actually threw his head back and laughed, a harsh, alien sound that echoed off the high walls of the chamber, seeming to startle several of the guards. He let his laugh die down to a chuckle, shaking his head. "Yes, perhaps I'll keep you around for a while before I kill you-I forgot how much I miss having you nearby."
"I can't say the feeling is mutual," Cara retorted, jerking once again at the bonds around her wrists. One of the guards nudged her with his sword, and she glared up at him. If looks could kill, the guard would be at the bosom of the Keeper.
"Yes," Rahl continued, clasping his hands behind his back. "I suppose you could call it revenge. Or perhaps boredom. It seemed the thing to do, after all that hassle to come back to life. And Keeper knows it will be handy having a Confessor at my beck and call."
"We don't even know if Erin has Confessor powers," Kahlan interrupted.
"True, she has shown no abilities yet," Rahl admitted. "But she's only six-the power of many Confessors does not manifest until their teenage years. I'm a patient man, and trust me when I say I've got all the time in the world." Rahl turned away from them, taking the three steps to his throne. He turned again and sat on the black marble, letting his robes settle around him regally. Cara sneered; Rahl had always had a taste for the dramatic. Rahl leaned back against his chair, letting his arms rest on the arm rests as he eyed Kahlan and Cara. "I'm not a complete monster, though. She's been treated well-better than well, I dare say. We're beginning to form quite a bond. Soon she won't even miss you and Richard."
Cara glanced over at Kahlan to see her jaw clenched, her fingers curled into tight fists behind her back. "Is that your plan, then?" Kahlan gritted. "Hope she forgets us?"
Rahl shrugged. "She's no fool, despite having Richard as a father; I doubt she'll simply forget. But in time, she'll come to see me as her true guardian. I'm not the complete villain you make me out to be, you know. I'm perfectly capable of kindness."
"It's not kindness when you're doing it to force a child to do your will," Kahlan snapped.
"But isn't that what the Confessors have done for generations, Kahlan?" Rahl asked, lifting an eyebrow. "Forced little girls to do their will for the greater good? At least I make no pretense of nobility or divine purpose." Cara was tempted to side with Rahl on that point, though Kahlan didn't seem particularly convinced.
"It doesn't matter how nice you pretend to be; she won't forgive you for taking her away from her parents."
"Ah, but she might," Darken Rahl said, lifting a finger to stop Kahlan's words, "if her mother told her in her best interest to do as I say."
"And why would I do that?" Kahlan asked, narrowing her eyes.
"Because it is in her best interest," Rahl said simply, giving a small, indifferent shrug. "May I remind you that she thrives only so long as I say she should? I have all the power here-don't ever forget that. I told her long ago she would see her mother again, and so she shall. You'll speak to her, and you'll tell her exactly what I want you to, and there will be no need for you to test the bounds of my hospitality towards your daughter."
Cara could see the muscles of Kahlan's arms straining as she pulled against the ropes binding her, letting Rahl's threat hover in the air between them. Kahlan stared at Rahl with a look so full of hatred, Cara was surprised Rahl did not recoil from it. Perhaps it was a sign of his wrongness that he scarcely seemed to register Kahlan's expression.
A moment passed, and Kahlan swallowed. "Fine," she said, her voice hoarse, as if she had been yelling for days. "I'll tell her what you want. But it won't matter in the end. You'll fall just like you have every time in the past."
"Maybe," Rahl said, and his smile seemed almost sad. "But let's see how far I can get this time, shall we?" He turned to the guard standing closest to his throne. "Fetch the girl."
19
They waited in silence, Rahl the picture of languor as he lounged on his throne; Kahlan's whole body a study in tense anticipation. Rahl had ordered the guards to untie them, claiming he didn't want Erin to think he and her mother were on less than friendly terms. Cara had immediately begun to plan how she could take down the half dozen guards in the room, but Rahl read her mind before she could think beyond the first crippling blow.
"I wouldn't," he said pointedly. "The guards are really only for show-if I wanted to, I could kill you from where I sit. The Keeper, whatever its other faults, has been rather generous with his gifts this time around." Rahl shrugged. "Perhaps it was a bit dramatic of me to have the guards here in the first place, but I've always liked a bit of flair to my misdeeds." Cara had a retort ready for that, but then she heard a noise at the door and turned to see Erin enter.
She wore a muslin dress, red-not quite the deep, blood red of the Mord'Sith, but more the color of spilled summer wine before it sets on white cloth. Her dark hair, so wild and untamed the last time Cara had seen it, was captured in a tight braid that seemed to tug violently at the edges of her temples. She held herself stiffly, and there was a wariness in her eyes that Cara was too familiar with. She seemed older, somehow, though still unbearably young.
Accompanying her was a tall, sallow-faced woman wearing black leather with a band of red slashed across her chest. From the way she held herself, Cara could tell she was no Mord'Sith, though her face had some of the ingrained hardness of those women. The hand she rested on Erin's shoulder was strangely gentle, however, and Cara wondered for a moment whether this woman was a nurse or a jailor, finally deciding she was likely both.
Erin's gait was listless, her eyes dull as she first shuffled in. Cara suddenly felt a sharp stab of fear, a kind of feeling she had only had a few times in her life, that Erin wouldn't be the same; that Rahl had done to her what he had done to Cara; that the old Erin was gone, and in her place was something made by others. But then Erin lifted her gaze and saw Kahlan.
Her eyes-Richard's eyes-went wide, impossibly wide. And then she was tearing herself out from under the woman's hands, and she was running across the stone floor, her dress streaming out behind her like flames, and throwing herself into Kahlan's arms. Kahlan absorbed her weight, burying her face at her daughter's neck, and she sank to her knees so Erin could cling to her.
"Mama!" came Erin's muffled wail from where she clutched Kahlan, and Kahlan only responded with the sound, so familiar since childhood, of, "Shh. Shh."
No one else moved, and for a long moment there was no sound but Erin's hiccupping sobs and Kahlan's soothing noises. Cara shelved whatever emotions were feebly attempting to bother her in favor of assessing the room. Every face was stony, but that meant little among people trained to conceal every hint of emotion. She wondered why Rahl let this go on, knowing it could not be compassion that motivated him. Perhaps it was simple respect for a force even he wasn't able to conquer.
But it couldn't last, and after a moment, Rahl cleared his throat, lifting an eyebrow in expectation. Kahlan moved her face away from Erin's. Ignoring Rahl, she smiled at Erin and gently smoothed the hair at her temples that had come loose from her braid. "It's alright," she said, running her thumbs over Erin's cheeks and wiping away childish tears. "I'm here." Erin nodded, seemingly unable to tear her eyes away from Kahlan's face, as if afraid even a momentary distraction would lead to her disappearance. "Are you hurt?" Kahlan asked intently, scanning Erin for any visible signs of injury. "Did anyone hurt you?"
Erin shook her head mutely, and Rahl's voice came floating down from the dais. "Now why would she be hurt, Kahlan? That seems a foolish question to ask. We've taken perfectly good care of your daughter, just like we agreed, right?"
For the first time since that first painful, needy call, Erin spoke. "He…he said you and him and daddy were friends. He said you knew he was taking me, but that you and daddy were really busy somewhere else so you couldn't come too. He said you would see me soon, after we got to his palace."
Kahlan tore her gaze away from Erin's, and the look she cast Rahl over her daughter's shoulder was so full of hatred and rage that Cara could almost taste it. Then Kahlan's face smoothed, and she turned back to Erin, smiling. "Yes. Your father and I have known Rahl for a long time. I'm sorry for the confusion, sweetheart, but there was too much going on, and we didn't have time to see you before you had to come here."
Erin nodded, looking confused at this somewhat illogical explanation. But like all children, she trusted the words of her mother.
"See, Erin," Rahl said, his voice warm. "I told you you would see your mother again. And you will again soon, but right now she and I need to have a little talk."
For the second time, Kahlan tore her gaze away from Erin's face to look at Rahl. "So soon?" she asked, her tone pleasant on the surface, but Cara could hear the hard vein of anger running underneath it. "Don't you think we can spare a bit more time before our talk?"
"There will be plenty of time for you two to reconnect later," Rahl responded affably, his lips curling into a thin smile, "but we have much to discuss right now. Say your goodbyes."
Kahlan's jaw tightened, her eyes never leaving Rahl's. Then she closed her eyes, just for a moment. When she opened them, Cara saw a flicker of something like loss cut across her face, before her expression smoothed into nothing. Kahlan turned back to Erin. "Erin," she said softly, resting her hands gently on Erin's shoulders and meeting the girl's eyes. "Do you remember that day a year ago, the day you and John went to the stables and John fell in the horse trough? He was covered in muck, and the chief hostler must have spent ten minutes chasing him around the stable." The most tentative of smiles crept to Erin's face, and she nodded. Kahlan smiled back. "Do you remember what we talked about later that afternoon?" Erin's brow furrowed for a moment, but then her eyes widened with remembrance, and she nodded again. "Good," Kahlan said. And then she pulled Erin to her for a tight hug, whispering into her ear as she did so. When she pulled back, there was something empty in her eyes, but she gave Erin her best smile anyway.
"What was that about?" Rahl asked, his eyes narrowing as he regarded the two of them.
"Just saying goodbye," Kahlan said, staring at him defiantly. "Or did you want me to say everything in the hearing of all of these dear friends of mine?" And she gestured towards the semi-circle of grim guards.
Rahl chuckled. "No, I suppose a few things are best kept between a mother and her child." He looked at Erin. "Now Erin, why don't you come over here? Selma will take you back to your chamber while your mother and I speak."
Erin turned to face Rahl, and for a moment there was such a fierce look of defiance on her face that Cara couldn't help but grin, because it meant that all Rahl's powers had somehow failed to cow this willful little six-year-old. But then Rahl's expression hardened, and he said, "Erin-I said come over here." At his tone, some of Erin's fire seemed to leave her.
"It's alright, sweetheart," Kahlan said, pulling Erin to her for a final hug. "Just remember what I said, and everything will be fine."
"I don't want to go," Erin whispered, her arms clinging tightly around Kahlan's neck.
"I know," Kahlan said, squeezing Erin tight before letting her go. "But you need to be brave right now, like mommy and daddy, alright?"
At this reference to her parents' bravery, Erin's face drew into an expression of determination. She nodded one final time and then turned, walking towards Rahl's throne and up the three steps of his dais.
The whole time Cara had been observing Kahlan's reunion with Erin, the rest of her mind had been speeding through possible escape plans, calculating odds and rejecting impossibilities. She wasn't afraid of torture; she almost relished the idea of spitting in the face of the Mord'Sith who had the mistaken idea she could be rebroken. Then her mind flashed to Kahlan at the hands of the Mord'Sith, and her hands clenched into fists. Kahlan could take a good deal of torture, Cara was sure, but she was no Mord'Sith; she hadn't been raised on pain like Cara. With the Rada'Han around Kahlan's neck, she could do little unless armed. And if Rahl was telling the truth (which Cara believed he was), then he had enough magic to overpower Cara even if she managed to break free.
She knew that Richard would come, eventually; after defeating Rahl and Gaiokos, nothing would stop him until he found his wife and daughter. But there was no telling if they would be alive by then, and Cara did not particularly anticipate the thought of relying on Richard Cypher for rescuing. She would simply have to bide her time until she was given an opportunity alone with a few guards. She had overcome worse odds.
But then she glanced over at Kahlan, who had risen to her feet, her back straight and her gaze defiant. A flicker of torchlight glinted off the metal of the Rada'Han, and Cara's gaze flitted to each of the guards surrounding them as she envisioned how many more there must be within the keep. Just for a moment, she felt a flash of despair, before banishing the feeling and turning to look at Rahl.
Erin stood beside where he sat, their eyes almost at the same level. Rahl smiled at her magnanimously. "Very good, Erin. Now, why don't you run along with Selma."
Erin hesitated, her eyes darting towards Kahlan for just a moment before she swallowed hard. "I-I wanted to tell you something."
"Oh?" Rahl asked, lifting an eyebrow in a mixture of boredom and amusement. Erin nodded vigorously, and she let her hand rest on Rahl's shoulder, leaning in over the arm of the chair, as if to whisper a secret. Rahl cocked his head towards Erin, letting his lips curl up as he met Kahlan's eyes, as if taunting her with promises of the many secrets he and her daughter would share in the future. It was only when Erin was breaths away from him, and her hand had slipped from his shoulder to his throat, that Rahl's expression skittered from amusement to alarm.
But by then, it was too late.
*****
Cara didn't wait to see what happened next; she was already wrenching the spear from the hands of the nearest guard, bringing her foot down hard and hearing the satisfying snap of his kneecap separating from the ligaments that held it in place. The guard howled in pain, but Cara was now spinning to swipe the blade of the spear across the neck of the guard nearest to Kahlan, the thin red line across the guard's neck growing thicker with blood as the man crumpled to his knees. Kahlan gave Cara the briefest of looks, and then she was running towards the dais. Cara had no glance to spare that way, because the remaining three guards were converging on her. She swung the haft of the spear in a great loop, knocking the feet out from the foremost guard. He landed soundly, grunting as his body hit the hard stones. Cara deflected another guard's sword swing and found the gap her deflection made. She jammed the spear into the man's stomach, but it caught on his chain mail and she couldn't tug it free. Abandoning the spear, she rolled just in time to avoid the third guard's spearhead. She landed right by the fallen, winded guard, and without hesitation, brought her fist down hard on his throat, crushing his windpipe. She sprang to her feet, wrenching the knife out from the guard's sheath. She spun and threw the knife, hoping she had gained some of Kahlan's skills with daggers. The blade just knicked the side of the guard's face before spinning off and clattering against the far wall. Cara was preparing to face the man's spear with only her bare hands when the guard suddenly jerked, and his body flew across the room to land with a sickening crunch against the far wall.
Cara looked over towards the dais to see Rahl standing, his right arm outstretched. Kahlan was at his feet, kneeling over Erin's motionless body. The woman in black-Selma-lay in a heap at the foot of the dais. There was no visible sign of injury on her, but her open, sightless eyes told their own story. Cara tensed, ready to take whatever Rahl threw at her. But Rahl only scanned the room, ensuring there was no other danger, and then turned to stare down at Erin, his brow creased with worry. Cara blinked. She reached down and pulled the sword out of the dead grip of one of the guard, letting his arm flop limply to the ground, and stalked towards the dais.
Kahlan glanced up when Cara reached her, the lines of her face tight with worry. Cara's eyes darted towards Rahl, unable to shake off the feeling that he might attack at any moment, but Rahl had eyes only for the small child at his feet.
"Will she be alright?" Cara demanded, watching as Kahlan smoothed the dark hair at Erin's temple again and again.
"She'll be fine," Kahlan said, though her voice was strained. "It was her first true Confession-she's only drained from it. She needs rest, and food when she wakes up." Kahlan looked up at Rahl. "Do we need to be worried about more guards coming?"
"Not yet," Rahl said, shaking his head. "I have power over everyone in this keep, in one way or another; my mistress need have no fear of those here." Cara stared at Rahl. There was something unreal, something deeply wrong, in hearing Darken Rahl refer to anyone as his mistress, particularly the six-year-old daughter of Richard Cypher. "I will make sure none come near her. In the meantime, I should show you to her chambers. She can rest there, and I can have food brought."
Kahlan looked as if she wanted nothing more than to plunge Cara's sword into Rahl's chest, but she gritted her teeth, recognizing necessity. "Fine. Take us there."
Kahlan scooped Erin up in her arms, giving Rahl a single, cutting glare when he made a motion to help. Then she and Cara followed Rahl through one of the side doors, down an empty corridor, and to the entrance to a heavy iron door.
Rahl opened the door, and they were met by a ghastly room. It had clearly once been the chamber of a soldier, made for size and practicality, not comfort. Someone had attempted to make it more fit for a child by bedecking the large four-poster bed with a pink canopy, and populating the room with a few similarly shaded pillows. A few toys were stacked neatly against one stone wall, while a large oval rug covered in forest scenes dominated the center of the room. The effect was altogether garish, the artificial cheer at sharp odds with the utilitarian structure of the room. Kahlan paused for a moment on the threshold, taking in the room. Her jaw worked, once, and then she pushed the rest of the way into the room, laying Erin gently on the surface of the bed.
She turned to face Rahl. "The key?" she demanded, holding out her hand. Rahl lifted an eyebrow, but he reached into his robe and handed Kahlan the key to the Rada'Han. Instantly, Kahlan had unlocked the device, letting it clatter to the ground. She addressed Rahl again. "Do what you need to do to keep Erin safe-and remember that, if she were awake, she would likely ask you to do what I tell you to do."
Rahl smiled at that, and for a moment he seemed like his old self. "You know I will do everything in my power to protect the Confessor, and I shall take your words under advisement. But I think I shall wait to see what Erin has to say before I begin taking orders from you."
Kahlan's eyes narrowed, and Cara had a hard time resisting the urge to snap Rahl's neck. But Rahl only dipped his head and turned to leave.
"And see if you can find my agiels while you're gone," Cara called after him, her own tone mocking. Rahl paused for a moment, his back to her, and then he passed through the door, shutting it gently behind him.
Kahlan seated herself beside Erin, whose wan face was pinched, as if she was having a particularly difficult dream. With great care, Kahlan reached down and undid the tie holding Erin's braid together. Gently, she began to comb her fingers through the thick hair, slowly unwinding the braids from each other. In a few moments, Erin's hair was free, fanned out around her face and shoulders. It softened her face, making her look younger. Kahlan let the back of her hand brush against Erin's cheek, and then she looked up to meet Cara's eyes. When she spoke, her voice sounded raw, and lost. "I wish there had been another way."
"And I wish Rahl had stayed dead the first time, or even the second," Cara responded, her voice brisk, though there was the slightest hint of softness underlying it. "There's no use in wishing for what can't be. If Erin hadn't Confessed him, we'd probably be enjoying quarters in his dungeons right now."
Kahlan shook her head. "Maybe. But think of what would have happened if I had guessed wrong-if she hadn't been able to Confess him? And…" she drew in a deep breath, "how is what I had her do any different from…from what my father did to me?"
Briefly, Cara considered slapping Kahlan. Instead she rolled her eyes. "Don't be an idiot, Kahlan. Really, your and Richard's need to blame yourself for everyone else's problems is bordering on ridiculous. What you did was nothing like what your father did; he used you, over and over, for his own gain. You had Erin use her powers-once-to prevent something far worse. Don't make a martyr out of yourself; it hardly suits you."
"I'm not…" Kahlan began, gritting her teeth and glaring at Cara, "I'm not making a martyr of myself. But…I didn't want her to have to do this, not like this. How can she recover from that?"
Cara shrugged. "How did either of us recover? "
"You didn't," Kahlan said bluntly. "You murdered and tortured people for years."
Cara smirked. "Well, yes. But the Mord'Sith trained me for years and years. And I got better, sort of." Kahlan snorted dubiously. "Your father controlled you for a long time, yet look how you turned out-the Mother Confessor, Mistress of Right." Cara's tone was sarcastic, but she also met Kahlan's eyes evenly, willing her to listen. "Children learn to recover-you know this. What's a few months in a child's life? And what's one Confession? Because of it, you have all the time in the world to make sure it's only a bad memory, one day."
Kahlan was silent, meeting Cara's eyes before she let her gaze drift towards the unconscious form beside her. "I hope you're right," she said softly.
*****
When Rahl returned, he held a platter of food in one hand and Cara's agiels in the other.
Cara moved towards him eagerly, nearly snatching the weapons out of his hands. He seemed about to make a snide comment, but then Erin made some small noise and he nearly flowed to her side, Cara utterly forgotten. Cara strapped her agiels to her side, feeling some piece of her restored as their pain bit into her sharply before settling down to a constant throb.
She turned to look at Erin, but the girl still hadn't opened her eyes. Kahlan examined the food Rahl brought, frowning. "She'll need tea-it will help restore her. Do you have any Majorim root?"
Rahl furrowed his brow. "Perhaps. I will check the kitchens." He left once more, and for a moment Cara wished he would regain his senses just so she could enjoy the look of horror on his face as he realized he had become the errand boy of the Mother Confessor and her daughter.
Just then, she heard a little mutter from the bed and Erin opened her eyes. She blinked into the dim torchlight, her eyes focusing on Kahlan's face. "Mama?" she said querulously, and Kahlan smiled wide as Cara had ever seen. Quietly, Cara moved to the far side of the room, trying to pretend she was utterly absorbed in the stark red tapestry that was the far wall's only decoration. She could hear the murmur of Kahlan and Erin speaking, but she chose not to focus on the words.
Several minutes later, she heard the door swing open and she spun, her hands resting on the handles of her agiels. But it was only Rahl, carrying a teapot and some green herbs. His eyes lit up when he saw that Erin was awake, and he rushed to the side of the bed, ignoring Kahlan's admonishing glare. "Mistress, you're awake!" he said in relief.
Erin's eyes darted towards Kahlan, her look unsure. Cara assumed Kahlan had explained everything to Erin, but she could imagine the child's disorientation at having Darken Rahl at her beck and call. Erin swallowed, and in a voice that started quietly but grew steadily stronger, she said, "I want you to do what mama and Mistress Cara tell you to do, ok?"
"As you wish, mistress," Rahl answered eagerly, dipping his head in acquiescence. Cara grinned, having sudden visions of the things she could order Rahl to do. But then her mind snapped immediately to the more pressing issue, now that Erin was secure and she and Kahlan out of immediate danger. Richard was still fighting Rahl and Gaiokos's forces in the Midlands, and Rahl was the only one who knew how to call those troops back.
She glanced at Kahlan. "We need to contact Richard," Cara said. "And if Rahl can help against Gaiokos's troops-"
"Go," Kahlan said immediately, her expression firm. "We'll be fine here-right?" she continued, addressing Rahl.
"Yes," Rahl responded, nodding confidently. "Nothing occurs here that I don't know about; no one acts against my will. I doubt there is a safer place in all of the Old Kingdom and D'Hara together."
As much as it went against Cara's instincts to trust Rahl, she knew he was right at the moment. "Take me to your Seer's Tower," she said. Casting one last look at Kahlan, she followed Rahl out the door.
20
After that, things moved quickly.
Rahl led Cara to the Seer's Tower, showing her where to find the necessary powders to fill the braziers. When Rahl showed no interest in leaving the room, Cara lifted an expectant eyebrow. Rahl shrugged. "Fine. But do say hello to my dear brother for me."
Cara grunted noncommittally, and Rahl left the room. Cara spoke the incantation, waiting impatiently for the young guard at the People's Palace to recover from his shock and summon Richard. When Richard entered, he seemed hard and distracted. His hair had grown long and shaggy, much like it had that first year Cara knew him, and again during the first war with Rahl. He wore the chain mail the metalworkers at Aydindril had designed specifically for him, its breastplate looped with subtle but practical designs. There were dark spots on the metal, red flecks that spoke of its recent use. Clearly the guard hadn't informed Richard of who was on the other end of the fire, as he seemed merely irritated when he first entered. But the moment he saw Cara, his eyes widened. "Cara!" he exclaimed, taking a step forward and reaching out a hand, as if he could actually touch her. "Where are you? Where's Kahlan? Did you find Erin?"
"Good to see you too, my Lord," Cara drawled, but at the desperation in his eyes, she relented and began speaking. She watched as his face registered each new revelation-lit with the knowledge Erin was safe, shuttered with the knowledge that Erin had Confessed Rahl.
"She's fine, then? Truly?" he asked finally, hope and doubt in every syllable.
Cara felt an uncharacteristic softening towards Richard; for once, she decided to humor her weaker instincts. "Yes, Richard, she'll be fine," Cara said firmly, her voice almost gentle. "She's with Kahlan now, but I'm sure she'll want to see you soon."
Richard nodded vigorously, a grin working its way to his face. Then he shook his head and his expression became serious. "So what can you tell me about Gaiokos's defenses?"
After that, there came the long plotting of how to systematically destroy Gaiokos's army. Cara deigned to let Rahl reenter the room to participate in the discussions. Rahl joined Cara in the middle of the mage circle, speaking his own matching incantation. Cara saw Richard's jaw tense when Rahl first appeared. "Brother," Rahl said, smiling wryly.
"Rahl," Richard answered, expressionless. Whatever emotions he was feeling, he tamped down in favor of tactical planning.
According to Rahl, transporting troops took enormous magic and not a small amount of time. It had been the work of months to deposit those first troops at the doorsteps of the People's Palace, Aydindril, and the Southern Keep, and it had left him drained for weeks. To reverse the process-to snap back every invading soldier still left in D'Hara and the Midlands-would take weeks, and it could not be done in one fell swoop. They began to plan out the most strategic method of removing troops, the method most likely to cause chaos among Gaiokos's army. They would start with the larger force outside the People's Palace, removing as many troops as Rahl could reasonably manage. Then they would bite into the troops at Aydindril, then the Southern Keep. There had been losses on both sides, according to Richard, though the native forces were holding their own. Had Rahl succeeded in transporting another three regiments, however, the sides might not have been so easily matched.
Later, Kahlan joined in the strategic discussions. Cara wasn't there the first time she and Erin saw Richard in the mage flames, but she was waiting outside when Kahlan exited the room. Cara was leaning against the wall, having spent the past ten minutes pacing up and down the hallway. She took a step towards Kahlan, then stopped, not sure what she was planning to do. Kahlan's face was drawn and tired, but calm. She gave Cara a faint smile, and then a shrug. "It's hard to say much when you're hundreds of miles away. Erin was glad to see him." She looked down at where Erin clasped her hand. The child had recovered fully from the strain of her first Confession, though it was hard to tell how she fared beyond the physical. She had always been a talkative child, rambling at length in a way Cara had always found headache-inducing. She was quieter now, and her eyes took in everything. But it had only been two days since Kahlan's arrival, and Cara did not particularly like the idea of trying to assess the inner workings of a child's mind.
Kahlan rarely let Erin out of her sight now, despite Rahl's repeated protestations that Erin could hardly find a safer place in the land. And, indeed, Rahl did seem to have an unnatural control over the people of the Keep. Rahl explained that he had performed a bonding spell with every member of the Keep, a kind of spell similar but far more powerful than the Spell of Binding Cara had performed years ago at Lastings. In many ways, the spell resembled the magic of Confession, demanding strict obedience from those under its thrall. In the end, Cara didn't much care for the details of the thing; once convinced of their safety, she turned her mind to practical matters.
There arose the question of where to put the troops Rahl removed; according to him, he could deposit them anywhere they chose, though the farther away the location, the more power it drained from him. Cara suggested the middle of the Bamoric Sea, but both Richard and Kahlan had blanched at the idea. And though Cara called them insufferably soft-hearted, some part of her had to admit that drowning in the ocean-amid the flailing limbs of your soldiers-at-arms, bewildered and choking on salt water-was no way to die.
In the end, they chose the icy plains to the south of Rahl's Keep and the Inlit Deserts to the east. It wasn't a death sentence; most would survive. But it would be a warning that next time, enemies of the north would not be so lucky. Gaiokos, however, would go nowhere; he was Richard's.
After all had been settled, there was nothing to do but wait.
*****
Cara did not enjoy waiting.
Her short scuffle with Rahl's guards seemed insufficient reward for months of bloodless travel. She wanted nothing more than to test her agiels out on some impertinent minion of Rahl's, but all the inhabitants of the Keep seemed to be doing their best to avoid her. The thought of Richard back in D'Hara, no doubt tossed into battle after battle, made Cara irrationally angry. The dark walls of the Keep seemed to press down on her, and she found herself pacing the narrow corridors like a caged animal, unconsciously clasping and unclasping the handles of her agiels.
Within a few days, she had explored every inch of the keep. She felt a moment of hope when she came across the quarters of the company of loyal Mord'Sith Rahl kept housed at the keep. She recognized one or two of them from the war, and they all knew who she was. They watched her warily as she circled the central Mord'Sith chamber, appraising the chains hanging from the ceilings, lightly running her fingers over the sharp blades and agiels and cutting devices arrayed neatly on the stone table nearby. She suspected she would have found Henry Peddlar hanging from the chains, skin a mottled red and black, had Kahlan not commanded that Rahl set him free. She turned to face the Mord'Sith, a challenging turn to her lips.
"Would any of you care for a practice bout? I imagine some of you may have…unfinished business with me."
One Mord'Sith spoke, a blond woman with cool, calculating eyes, and Cara thought she recognized that voice; Rahl had held favorites among the Mord'Sith (Cara had once been one, she sometimes forgot). "The Lord Rahl has forbidden us to harm you or the Confessor," the woman said, and Cara thought she detected a smug tone to the woman's voice. Cara scowled and bit back a curse. She had the sneaking suspicion that Rahl had made that order not to protect Cara, but to prevent her from having any contact with this company. Rahl, though utterly and unquestionably devoted to Erin, had shown not unexpected creativity in choosing how he followed Kahlan and Cara's orders. Cara briefly considered asking Rahl to release his injunction on some of the Mord'Sith, but she couldn't bring herself to ask him for anything, even if it was for him to allow his Mord'Sith to hurt her.
Cara briefly debated whether to beat the life out of the impertinent Mord'Sith, or perhaps toss her off the parapet to the stone flagons below. Then she controlled herself and stilled her expression into one of haughty disinterest. "Ah. Pity. I would have enjoyed beating you all-again." She turned then, without noting the expressions on the women's faces. She felt a brief surge of satisfaction, but it faded quickly; she was still humming with unspent energy.
Cara considered asking Kahlan to spar, but Kahlan was frequently busy consulting with those running Aydindril in her absence, and spent the rest of her time with Erin. Cara herself spent long hours every day running tactics with Grayson, Besdick, and Amista, as well as discussing the schedule for Rahl's troop extraction. There was a time when she would have found this work tedious, but now she craved it; her only regret was that she couldn't be in the midst of it, commanding troops and putting her agiels to good use.
Cara growled as she stalked back to her chambers, cursing truculent Mord'Sith and conniving lords. Her chambers lay near the center of the keep, adjoined to Kahlan and Erin's. At Kahlan's instructions, Rahl had spelled the rooms so only Erin, Kahlan, or Cara could open them, a precaution Rahl bluntly called unnecessary. Secretly, Cara agreed-there was hardly a time when Erin wasn't within sight of either Cara or Kahlan-but she also knew the spell was the only way Kahlan was willing to leave Erin in her chambers while she took meetings in the Seer's tower. The rooms weren't half bad, and certainly superior to travesty of Erin's old room. They even led out to the private courtyard Rahl had installed at the center of the keep. At the thought of this courtyard, Cara felt a sudden flash of inspiration. If she couldn't spar with someone else, at least she could keep herself in shape.
Cara stepped out into the courtyard and breathed in deeply, smelling cedar and summer grass. The courtyard was large, with a circular area of stone ringed by trees, shrubs, and wildflowers. Frankly, it felt entirely out of place, completely counter to the sinister feeling of the keep. Not for the first time, Cara wondered why Rahl had decided to have it built, but she didn't wonder enough to ask.
Cara rolled her neck, working out the kinks. She swung her arms, already feeling the fresh air work upon her and sweep away the tendrils of malaise that seemed to breathe from the dark walls of the keep. Cara drew a breath through her nose and drew her agiels, the pain sparking through her fingers, shooting down to her feet and through her chest, sending her head buzzing with comforting pain. She made a few experimental swings, warming up, and then she fell to it, thrusting, parrying, and generally bludgeoning her invisible opponents to death. After an hour, she began to feel her muscles begin to ache, and she greeted the feeling with relief.
It wasn't until a half hour later that Cara noticed she wasn't alone.
She stilled her last swing, her breathing slightly labored, and turned to stare at Erin. The girl was tucked amid the roots of one of the trees lining the courtyard like a young spring flower. When Cara looked her way, she started guiltily, but she didn't move.
"Well?" Cara said, cocking an eyebrow. "Are you going to come over here?"
Erin froze, and then she was scrambling to her feet, walking towards Cara and pausing a couple of feet away. She wore the simple brown dress Kahlan had dug up from somewhere in the keep, and her hair was pulled back loosely by a tie. She stood staring at Cara, seemingly unsure what to say. Cara sighed, resisting the urge to cross her arms and glare at the girl, as she would an errant soldier. "Why are you watching me?"
Erin swallowed, but then that look of determination entered her eyes. "Can you…can you show me how to do that?"
Cara frowned, eyeing the girl narrowly. She knew this could go terribly wrong, and she wasn't entirely sure Kahlan would approve. But she also knew what she would have wanted, at Erin's age, so she made a decision. "Show me a fist," she commanded curtly. Erin blinked, but then she curled her fingers into a ball, holding her hand up for Cara to inspect. Cara nodded in approval; at least the girl knew not to tuck her thumb in. "Good. Now let me see you punch." Cara held out her hand, palm out. To her credit, Erin only hesitated a moment before she reeled back her arm and swung at Cara. Her fist hit Cara's palm and rebounded; Cara's palm didn't move. Cara frowned. The girl's punch had the force of a wet noodle, but she supposed that wasn't entirely unexpected. Cara shook her head. "Not like that. Don't swing your arm back all the way-your opponent will see it coming for miles. Punch from the waist, or from a fighting position. It's faster."
Cara showed Erin a fighting stance, shifting the girl's feet and watching as her punches gradually became slightly less pathetic. "Better," Cara finally said. "Now what about kicking? Has anyone showed you where you should kick a man?" Erin hesitated, but then she pointed towards Cara's crotch. Cara grinned. "Good. Your education has not been entirely useless. But not every opponent will be a man." She then proceeded to show Erin all the sensitive spots the girl could reach-the instep, the knee, the floating ribs. She concluded by bluntly saying, "And if you can reach it, the eyes are always a good place to strike-anything soft usually is." Erin nodded seriously, her hands resting loosely at her sides, though they were still balled into fists. "That's enough, I think," Cara said firmly. "Practice that."
Erin nodded, her eyes bright. She took a few steps away from Cara and began practicing her punches and kicks. Cara watched her for a moment. There was much flailing of uncoordinated limbs, but the girl did seem to get the gist of what Cara had told her. Cara shrugged and resumed her own exercises.
The next day when Cara entered the courtyard at the same time as the day before, Erin was already there. Cara sighed, but then resigned herself and waved for Erin to approach. Erin practically skipped over to Cara, clearly trying to look serious and stoic, all the while fighting a smile. Her seriousness became real enough, however, once Cara began instructing her again. They reviewed the previous day's material, and then Cara began to show Erin some footwork that any half-decent fighter needed to know. Watching Erin, Cara had to keep reminding herself that most children did not receive the early training she and her Mord'Sith sisters had. Erin was, after all, rather young.
They kept this up for two more days, during the time when Kahlan was usually conferring with Aydindril. On the fifth day, Cara decided to show Erin locks and breaks. She positioned Erin in front of her and wrapped her hand around Erin's wrist. Her hand more than fit, her fingers overlapping the thumb by an inch. "Now how would you get out?" Cara asked matter-of-factly. Erin's brow furrowed. Then, without warning, she kicked towards Cara's shins. Cara saw the movement and managed to shift her weight, but not before Erin had delivered a kick that might leave the minutest of bruises. Cara grinned. "Good. But you're still in my grip, and someone grabbing you probably won't be standing still. Try again." This time, Erin tugged at Cara's arm, clearly straining as she tried to make the woman move; Cara didn't budge.
"Stop," Cara finally said, sighing. "You are very tiny. I am not. Yanking on me will clearly never work." Erin scowled, something of Kahlan's stubbornness shining through her eyes, and Cara felt her lips twitch. "Now you grab my wrist." She held out her wrist for Erin to grab, and the girl dutifully wrapped her fingers around Cara's arm, the tips of her fingers just touching her thumb. "Now," Cara began. "I could pull away from you, but you're expecting that, so you'll tense up and pull in the opposite direction. Instead, use the momentum of the other person." With that, she thrust her arm out in the direction Erin was already pulling, fast as a snake, breaking free of the grasp before whipping her fist around to hover a half an inch from Erin's nose. Erin blinked. "Do you see?" Cara said, lowering her arm. "Sometimes you have to use your opponent's own force, especially when they're stronger than you. Now you try."
They spent some time on the most basic grabs, and gradually Erin began to understand the idea of moving with her opponent, not against her. After Cara felt they had worked long enough, she held up her hand for Erin to stop. She eyed Erin carefully, noticing the color of her cheeks, the brightness of her eyes. She seemed more alive than she had in days, almost like her old self. Perhaps she would have even talked more if she didn't seem mildly enamored of Cara's own taciturn stylings, as if it were some ritualistic aspect of her training regimen. Cara chose her next words carefully.
"That's an important lesson to learn-when to submit to an opponent." She was about to say it was something she had learned from the Mord'Sith-yielding to the more powerful-but decided that might send the wrong message. "You will not always be the strongest. In fact, it will probably be a very long time until you are the strongest. Waiting until you are more powerful is not weakness; it's strategy."
Erin was listening intently, her expression serious, though not completely comprehending. Cara had the sudden, somewhat unpleasant feeling that she was performing the functions of a schoolmarm. Sighing, she crouched down so she was eye-level with Erin. She met Erin's brown eyes, putting force into her words. "It's like the locks-sometimes you'll meet someone with a stronger grip. Sometimes you can't break out, even when you try every strategy you know, even when use their own force against them. So you wait. Sometimes you find a chance to get free; sometimes someone else does it for you. You do what you can to survive. Do you understand?"
Erin's brow furrowed, her expression a mixture of doubt and uneasy hope. She hesitated before speaking. "Mama told me not to tell anyone about the Confession? So I didn't, even though Darken-I mean Rahl-wanted me to."
"I know," Cara said briskly. "You waited. That was smart."
"He was nice," Erin said, scrunching up her face in confusion, "but I didn't like him. I know I was supposed to be brave, like mama and papa, but he was…he was scary. Not like now."
"That's smart too," Cara said coolly. "There's nothing wrong with being afraid when you're clearly outmatched."
"Are you ever afraid?" Erin asked, her expression curious.
"No," Cara said haughtily, rising to her feet. "I'm never outmatched."
At Cara's words, a small giggle escaped Erin's lips before she clapped both hands over her mouth, her eyes going wide as she stared at Cara. Cara had to turn her back so Erin wouldn't see her smile. That's when she saw Kahlan standing off to the side, leaning against a tree as she observed them.
Cara kept her face still. "Kahlan," she said evenly.
"Cara," Kahlan answered smoothly. She addressed Erin, her voice warm. "Sweetheart, why don't you run inside? Cara and I need to talk."
Erin nodded, casting a quick glance Cara's way before heading towards the door. Kahlan pushed herself off the tree and approached Cara. Cara waited, her body slightly tense.
"What are you doing?" Kahlan asked. Her voice wasn't exactly accusing; it was almost curious.
Cara shrugged. "Teaching her how to fight."
"Why?" Kahlan asked, a certain brittleness buzzing at the edge of her words. "She doesn't need to fight now, not yet. Not now that I'm here."
"Do you think that matters?" Cara snapped, her eyes hard as she stared at Kahlan. "You should know as well as anyone that you can't predict what happens to you as a child. And it's not about defending herself-the girl has the heft of invalid goat. It's about her knowing she has power if she needs it."
"Do you think you know my daughter better than I do?" Kahlan asked, the danger clear in the way she held herself.
"No," Cara said quietly. "But I know what it's like to be raised by Mord'Sith between Darken Rahl's walls."
"It's not the same," Kahlan spat. There was anger in her tone, but also a vein of desperation. "She wasn't raised by them-she was raised by me and Richard. Rahl didn't treat her like one of…one of them."
"I know," Cara said calmly. "And that's why she'll recover. But that doesn't mean she doesn't need to feel like she's regained her power." Cara paused, looking down at her side and watching her fingers curl and uncurl around the handle of her agiel. If it weren't for the pleasant pain coursing through her, she might have thought they were someone else's hands. She swallowed and made her voice empty. "The moment I regained my power was the moment I first used my agiel against one of the women who used it on me." She looked up again, meeting Kahlan's gaze defiantly. "She should learn how to defend herself."
Kahlan stared back at Cara, and then she closed her eyes. Her body seemed to deflate, to sink in on itself. She opened your eyes. "You're right," she said softly. "I was going to teach her dagger lessons in a couple of years anyway. I always wanted her to be able to defend herself, to know she could. I just…" Kahlan sighed, shaking her head ruefully. "I want to protect her, even though I know there's only so much I can do. Perhaps I'm trying to shield her unnecessarily. Perhaps I'm overreacting."
"Do you think?" Cara asked.
Kahlan glared at her. "I think my caution is somewhat justified, considering the circumstances-don't you?" Cara only shrugged and smirked in return. "So," Kahlan said resignedly, "how does my daughter fare against the dreaded Cara Mason?"
"Well, she punches like a six-year-old girl," Cara said bluntly, and Kahlan laughed. The sound echoed off the walls of the courtyard, as if it belonged there.
*****
The next day, Kahlan joined them in the courtyard. She wore her brown traveling garments, and she carried her daggers. Erin's eyes lit up when she saw Kahlan. Kahlan glanced at Cara, lifting an eyebrow. "Erin, would you like to see some real fighting?"
Erin nodded eagerly, a grin stretching her face. Cara cracked her neck and drew her agiels, hearing their whisper and barely repressing her own grin of anticipation. She and Kahlan circled each other warily, each watching the other's steps. They had sparred during their journey, as they had throughout the years before. Every time they did, Cara felt she learned something new about the way Kahlan moved.
She noticed a slight shift in Kahlan's stance just before Kahlan lunged at her. Then they were at it, agiels and daggers dipping and spinning, feet moving too fast to follow, eyes watching every slight movement. Cara felt her heart begin to race, and she couldn't hold back the fierce smile that broke out on her face. This was what she needed; this was what she had needed for a long time.
They were evenly matched, so evenly matched that neither managed to land a solid blow. Finally, they broke apart, both breathing heavily. Cara could feel the sweat at the nape of her neck and the small of her back, and the ache in her calves that signaled a good bout.
"Enough?" Kahlan asked, lifting an eyebrow.
"For now," Cara agreed with a nod, sheathing her agiels. She turned to see Erin staring at them from her perch on a bench, her eyes wide as could be.
"Well?" Cara asked in amusement. "What did you think?"
"It was good," Erin said, nodding vigorously. "Really good. Will I be able to do that?"
"No," Cara said immediately, and then sighed when she saw Kahlan's following scowl. "Maybe. With lots of practice. Lots of practice."
Erin was still nodding, as if her neck belonged to one of those bobble toys the street vendors in Aydindril sold.
"So," Kahlan said to Erin, wiping her daggers on her dress before sheathing them. "Who do you think won?"
Erin's eyes, impossibly enough, went even wider as she glanced back and forth between Kahlan and Cara. "The truth?"
"Always," Kahlan said firmly, though Cara heard the amusement underlying her tone. Erin hesitated, her eyes shifting between the two of them, and then she lifted up a finger and pointed towards Cara.
"You traitor!" Kahlan exclaimed indignantly, glaring at Erin. "Your own flesh and blood, and you choose Cara!" Erin grinned unapologetically, and Kahlan swooped down on her. "You'll pay for that!" she announced, and then she began to tickle Erin relentlessly until the girl was nothing but a giggling mess on the stones of the courtyard. Cara watched them, trying to hold back a smile. But here, in this courtyard that was nowhere that was real, she thought that maybe she didn't need to hold it back.
Part 8