Nonviolent Communications?

[teamnoir]

I'm considering taking some NVC training, (http://cnvc.org, http://baynvc.org), and I was wondering if anyone within the sound of my voice has done so. And if so, what sort of training, what level, how long, and how it was for you?

Comments

[trinsf]

Someone on my Flist has, but I don't remember who. Also, I'd be interested in doing this, or at least attending one of the intro events this coming week. I have been considering a minor in Communication Studies for this year, but NVC may be more what I'm looking for.

[teamnoir]

I'm already booked for the Wednesday intro in the city. I think you have to book by tomorrow at the latest if you want to go. I was planning to motorcycle but I could drive.

[trinsf]

Registered. I don't see anything about having to have the book, though I could have it by Tuesday easily.

[teamnoir]

Have you read the book?

[teamnoir]

Thanks.

[inflectionpoint]

I'm glad to see you mention the critiques of NVC, they are a big part of why I tend to steer clear of it myself. I've had horrible experiences with people using NVC who didn't understand some basics about keeping conversations on track, making sure that both people are being heard, and really not letting it get derailed. Those experiences were bad enough that personally, I just don't wish to go there.

I mention this, because you may meet people who don't want to do it, won't want to do it, and will become upset and unhappy if you try to do it with them. I am one of them. This may appear puzzling from outside, but not everyone will want to use or do NVC.

The concepts are worth learning, and may be helpful to anyone, even if you don't practice them with others, but only in refining your own thinking.

Good luck!

[teamnoir]

I've seen this too. I know someone who closes conversation down because it's in the wrong format. She seems to equate non-nvc formats as equivalent to violence against her person.

I don't think this is inherent in the system, though.

I also have some experience with NLP and NLP has certainly earned itself some black marks in its history as well. I'd sooner hear the criticisms and learn from them.

[gvdub]

You might also look for information on AVP (Alternatives to Violence Project), a program which started as an offshoot of QPCC (Quaker Projects on Commnunity Conflict) and the Friends programs that were developed to train non-violent marshals for anti-war demonstrations in the late '60s and early '70s. QPCC was originally based in NYC, but has spread across the country.

Also AVP California.

[teamnoir]

Thanks. Mostly I'm looking for communications technologies and forums which might have more knowledge about empathy.

[trinsf]

Yeah, what he said. I'm considering a Comm Studies minor to work on a more balanced communication style when engaging in dialogue about and around religion. My interest is less in non-violence and more in communication technologies.

[slfisher]

I'm sure I've had friends who've taken it and I can ask around.

Something else you might want to look at is mediation training; obviously you're not going to go to Boise State, but they offer a certificate in mediation, and perhaps a school closer to you might offer that.

[teamnoir]

Thanks.

[trinsf]

I'm planning to pursue mediation training once I'm in grad school. There's no way to fit it into my schedule right now. :-)

[lobolance]

I've wanted to take a class for years. Very cool you're giving it a go.

I've read the book, and listened to a long audio series. And practiced. There's another book by another author, called *Taking the War Out of Words* which is an expanded take on the same concepts. I loved it.

I hear criticisms about the program... but it's always about people who don't actually apply the principles, just ham-handedly use the "techniques" without the intention or without doing the listening half (the 'empathy' part as you put it). It's never about people who do the process whole-heartedly.

[teamnoir]

Thanks. That's a useful observation. And yeah, I've seen at least one example of that problem too. I know someone who closes conversation down because it's in the wrong format. She seems to equate non-nvc formats as equivalent to violence against her person. That's certainly not what I got from reading the book.

[teamnoir]

Intro, 7pm in the city on Wednesday. Have to sign up today if you want to go. I'm going. http://baynvc.org