Birthday Fic! (Angelus Interruptus, Sam/Dean, 1/1, Adult)
Today is feather_autant's birthday! ::hugs you and twirls you and throws sparkly things west::
Up to my eyeballs in tax time, I didn't actually get around to asking her what she wanted this year but last year she wanted Sam and Dean and yesterday, just in the nick of time, I got this idea... Thanks to destina for the super speedy beta.
Also, Joss Whedon has made using the latin of angel complicated. "Damn you, Joss Whedon!" ::shakes fist in the general direction of LA:: Thus a disclaimer: This has nothing to do with the Buffyverse. Honest.
Angelus Interruptus
Sam/Dean
Adult
1,451 words
Angelus Interruptus
"Dean. Sam. I need to speak with you."
Sam froze as he bottomed out inside Dean, his eyes snapping open. Dean, who could see Castiel standing at the foot of the bed over Sam's broad shoulder, made a somewhat girly shriek he'd deny later. The next few moments were a blur of motion that ended with both Winchesters sitting up against the headboard, pillows over their groins, sweat damp hips and shoulders pressed together, and erections wilting -- well, wilted in Dean's case. Though he couldn't see Sam's dick, given his brother's expression Dean was willing to bet said dick had deflated faster than a tire with a spike in it.
Castiel frowned. "Is this a bad time?"
"Is this a bad time?" Dean repeated. He was about to explain using short and profane words why yeah, this was a bad time when Sam interrupted.
"Dean didn't agree to this. I forced him."
"You what?" Complete and total disbelief had pushed his voice back into the realm of girly shrieking but Dean ignored that for the moment.
Kind of the way both Sam and Castiel were ignoring him. Sam had gone rigid, and not in a good way, and Castiel looked confused.
"It didn't look like you were forcing him," the angel pointed out. "He looked like he very much wanted you to proceed."
"Maybe because I…" Dean began but Sam interrupted again.
"I used my powers."
"The hell you did!" Dean snarled.
Sam continued to ignore him, although Castiel shot him a glance that suggested the angel had no more idea of what was going on than Dean did.
"If you're going to punish anyone…" Sam shifted to put as much of his bulk between Dean and Castiel as was possible given their positions. ""…punish me."
"Sam!" Dean grabbed his brother's shoulder and yanked him around, just enough so he could see his face. "What the fuck are you talking about?"
Sam's lips were pressed together into a thin, pink line and without moving his head he glanced down first at Dean's body, then at his own.
Which was when the clue bus hit.
An angel of the Lord had just walked in on the Winchester brothers stripped to skin and having sex. Brothers. Having sex. And to add insult to mortal sin, Dean had been bottoming.
"Oh crap."
Sam rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to Castiel. "I was the one who…"
"The fuck you were!"
"Dean…"
"Oh no!" He punched Sam in the shoulder, curving his right hand across his body so he could get some force behind it. "You don't take the fucking fall for this!"
"Look, I'm already…"
Knuckles still aching from the impact, Dean grabbed Sam's jaw and forced the stubborn S.O.B. to meet his gaze. "If you say you're already damned, I will hurt you! And you don't get to protect me from this. Not from this. If anyone takes the blame, it's me. I'm older."
"I'm bigger."
"I have no idea what you two are talking about." Castiel pulled a chair out from the table and sat down, legs crossed, hands folded on his knee. "Would one of you care to explain?"
"I accept full responsibility for this," Dean said quickly before Sam could open his big, fat mouth again.
Castiel's borrowed brows rose. "For what?"
"This!" Dean let go of Sam's jaw and waved the hand between them. "Me. Sam. What you walked in on."
"Okay."
Dean frowned, ran over the situation in his head, and couldn't get to okay. "That's it?"
The angel shrugged, the human gesture looking strangely elegant and even more strangely awkward. "What more should there be?"
"Uh…" Dean glanced at Sam, who shrugged in turn. "I dunno -- wrath of God?"
Castiel blinked. "For what?"
"Maybe we should just let it go," Sam muttered.
Unfortunately, by the time Dean realized that was a damned good idea, his mouth was already moving. "Cas, you do know what you walked in on, right?"
"Fornication." Castiel blinked again, head cocked to one side. It was, Dean realized, exactly the same creepy ass expression terminators wore when they were accessing their data bases. "Anal sex. Bone smuggling. Driving the Hershey highway. Plowing the back field. Gardening uphill."
Sam covered his face with his hands. From the color of his ears, Dean would bet solid money he was blushing. "Please stop."
"Homosexual incest." Having apparently covered what he considered the definitive descriptions, Castiel stared at them for a moment and said, "Why do you think God cares?"
"Uh…" Dean scratched his left ankle with the toe of his right foot. "Sodom and Gomorrah?"
Castiel snorted. "Don't flatter yourselves. Were you both willing participants in full awareness of what you were doing?"
"Well, yeah but.."
"Were you hurting anyone by your actions?"
"No, but…"
"Were you neglecting your responsibilities?"
"No, but…"
"Do you find comfort in this closeness?"
"Yes, but…"
One hand raised to cut off the continuing protests, Castiel locked that unnaturally blue gaze on Dean's face and asked, "Do you love him?"
Dean could feel Sam trembling beside him. Not a movement anyone could see but pressed together, skin to skin, he couldn't miss it. Winchesters did not talk about their feelings. Winchesters went to Hell before they talked about their feelings. Been there. Done that. He took a deep breath. "Yes."
"Then why should there be a problem?"
"We're brothers," Sam reminded him softly. "Your…" Dean could hear a couple dozen words considered then discarded in the pause. "…rules have something to say about that."
"There are many rules," Castiel agreed. "There are rules concerning the combination of cheese with meat and yet you continue to eat cheeseburgers."
Dean's stomach growled. He couldn't see Sam roll his eyes but he didn't need to.
Castiel smiled. "Honour the Lord, love one another -- on these two commandments lay all the laws and the prophets. Awareness. Consent. Responsibility." He ticked them off on raised fingers. "Comfort. Love. And the greatest of these, is love. God has no care for your flesh, only your spirit." He stared at Sam who closed his hands into a white knuckled grip on the pillow over his groin. "This is no concern of His. From what I witnessed, I am a little concerned that Dean will not be functional tomorrow but…"
"I'll be fine!"
"But the comparative sizes of Sam's penis and your…"
"Dude! Let it go!" Dean shifted his leg so his thigh pressed up against Sam's. "And if you're not here for smiting, why the hell are you here?"
"Oh. Well, after Uriel's hatred of Humanity turned him against the armies of Heaven, orders came down that we were to get to know you better."
"Know us better?" As far as Dean was concerned, given what he'd walked in on, Castiel had gotten to know them a damned sight better than he was comfortable with.
"No, not you, specifically. We are to get to know Humanity better."
"Okay." Finally relaxing back against the headboard, Dean sighed. "So if you're not getting to know us specifically, why are you here."
"There was something I needed explained." Castiel frowned, head down as if he were searching for the right words.
Dean braced himself. Nothing like explaining Humanity to an angel while buck naked, having been interrupted while having sex with your brother.
"Why," Castiel began, looking up, "would the FOX network even consider cancelling The Sarah Connor Chronicles when there is about to be a major motion picture and millions of dollars of free publicity?"
"What?"
"Why would the FOX network…"
Dean waved him quiet. "I heard you," he growled. "I just didn't believe you. I am sitting here with…" Sam's hand closed around his arm, the pressure a warning, and yeah, maybe the phrase with lube dribbling out of my ass didn't need to be said. "Naked," he snarled instead. "Both of us are sitting here naked. When people are naked, you don't interrupt for anything less than the apocalypse. The actual apocalypse. Happening at that precise moment," he added when Castiel opened his mouth. "When people are naked, if it can wait, it should wait. You got that?"
"Yes. I understand, however, I still do not understand why…"
"Because they have shit for brains," Sam told him.
Castiel blinked one last time. "Oh," he said. And disappeared.
"You know he sucks at metaphor," Dean muttered. "He'll be back."
"But not while we're naked."
Dean reached down and scratched at where things were congealing. "Let's hope."
They sat quietly for a moment. Turned out there was nothing like an angel popping in with a crisis about popular culture to ruin the mood.
Finally Dean sighed and tossed his pillow onto the other bed. "Cheeseburger?"
Sam shrugged. "Why not."
Up to my eyeballs in tax time, I didn't actually get around to asking her what she wanted this year but last year she wanted Sam and Dean and yesterday, just in the nick of time, I got this idea... Thanks to destina for the super speedy beta.
Also, Joss Whedon has made using the latin of angel complicated. "Damn you, Joss Whedon!" ::shakes fist in the general direction of LA:: Thus a disclaimer: This has nothing to do with the Buffyverse. Honest.
Angelus Interruptus
Sam/Dean
Adult
1,451 words
Angelus Interruptus
"Dean. Sam. I need to speak with you."
Sam froze as he bottomed out inside Dean, his eyes snapping open. Dean, who could see Castiel standing at the foot of the bed over Sam's broad shoulder, made a somewhat girly shriek he'd deny later. The next few moments were a blur of motion that ended with both Winchesters sitting up against the headboard, pillows over their groins, sweat damp hips and shoulders pressed together, and erections wilting -- well, wilted in Dean's case. Though he couldn't see Sam's dick, given his brother's expression Dean was willing to bet said dick had deflated faster than a tire with a spike in it.
Castiel frowned. "Is this a bad time?"
"Is this a bad time?" Dean repeated. He was about to explain using short and profane words why yeah, this was a bad time when Sam interrupted.
"Dean didn't agree to this. I forced him."
"You what?" Complete and total disbelief had pushed his voice back into the realm of girly shrieking but Dean ignored that for the moment.
Kind of the way both Sam and Castiel were ignoring him. Sam had gone rigid, and not in a good way, and Castiel looked confused.
"It didn't look like you were forcing him," the angel pointed out. "He looked like he very much wanted you to proceed."
"Maybe because I…" Dean began but Sam interrupted again.
"I used my powers."
"The hell you did!" Dean snarled.
Sam continued to ignore him, although Castiel shot him a glance that suggested the angel had no more idea of what was going on than Dean did.
"If you're going to punish anyone…" Sam shifted to put as much of his bulk between Dean and Castiel as was possible given their positions. ""…punish me."
"Sam!" Dean grabbed his brother's shoulder and yanked him around, just enough so he could see his face. "What the fuck are you talking about?"
Sam's lips were pressed together into a thin, pink line and without moving his head he glanced down first at Dean's body, then at his own.
Which was when the clue bus hit.
An angel of the Lord had just walked in on the Winchester brothers stripped to skin and having sex. Brothers. Having sex. And to add insult to mortal sin, Dean had been bottoming.
"Oh crap."
Sam rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to Castiel. "I was the one who…"
"The fuck you were!"
"Dean…"
"Oh no!" He punched Sam in the shoulder, curving his right hand across his body so he could get some force behind it. "You don't take the fucking fall for this!"
"Look, I'm already…"
Knuckles still aching from the impact, Dean grabbed Sam's jaw and forced the stubborn S.O.B. to meet his gaze. "If you say you're already damned, I will hurt you! And you don't get to protect me from this. Not from this. If anyone takes the blame, it's me. I'm older."
"I'm bigger."
"I have no idea what you two are talking about." Castiel pulled a chair out from the table and sat down, legs crossed, hands folded on his knee. "Would one of you care to explain?"
"I accept full responsibility for this," Dean said quickly before Sam could open his big, fat mouth again.
Castiel's borrowed brows rose. "For what?"
"This!" Dean let go of Sam's jaw and waved the hand between them. "Me. Sam. What you walked in on."
"Okay."
Dean frowned, ran over the situation in his head, and couldn't get to okay. "That's it?"
The angel shrugged, the human gesture looking strangely elegant and even more strangely awkward. "What more should there be?"
"Uh…" Dean glanced at Sam, who shrugged in turn. "I dunno -- wrath of God?"
Castiel blinked. "For what?"
"Maybe we should just let it go," Sam muttered.
Unfortunately, by the time Dean realized that was a damned good idea, his mouth was already moving. "Cas, you do know what you walked in on, right?"
"Fornication." Castiel blinked again, head cocked to one side. It was, Dean realized, exactly the same creepy ass expression terminators wore when they were accessing their data bases. "Anal sex. Bone smuggling. Driving the Hershey highway. Plowing the back field. Gardening uphill."
Sam covered his face with his hands. From the color of his ears, Dean would bet solid money he was blushing. "Please stop."
"Homosexual incest." Having apparently covered what he considered the definitive descriptions, Castiel stared at them for a moment and said, "Why do you think God cares?"
"Uh…" Dean scratched his left ankle with the toe of his right foot. "Sodom and Gomorrah?"
Castiel snorted. "Don't flatter yourselves. Were you both willing participants in full awareness of what you were doing?"
"Well, yeah but.."
"Were you hurting anyone by your actions?"
"No, but…"
"Were you neglecting your responsibilities?"
"No, but…"
"Do you find comfort in this closeness?"
"Yes, but…"
One hand raised to cut off the continuing protests, Castiel locked that unnaturally blue gaze on Dean's face and asked, "Do you love him?"
Dean could feel Sam trembling beside him. Not a movement anyone could see but pressed together, skin to skin, he couldn't miss it. Winchesters did not talk about their feelings. Winchesters went to Hell before they talked about their feelings. Been there. Done that. He took a deep breath. "Yes."
"Then why should there be a problem?"
"We're brothers," Sam reminded him softly. "Your…" Dean could hear a couple dozen words considered then discarded in the pause. "…rules have something to say about that."
"There are many rules," Castiel agreed. "There are rules concerning the combination of cheese with meat and yet you continue to eat cheeseburgers."
Dean's stomach growled. He couldn't see Sam roll his eyes but he didn't need to.
Castiel smiled. "Honour the Lord, love one another -- on these two commandments lay all the laws and the prophets. Awareness. Consent. Responsibility." He ticked them off on raised fingers. "Comfort. Love. And the greatest of these, is love. God has no care for your flesh, only your spirit." He stared at Sam who closed his hands into a white knuckled grip on the pillow over his groin. "This is no concern of His. From what I witnessed, I am a little concerned that Dean will not be functional tomorrow but…"
"I'll be fine!"
"But the comparative sizes of Sam's penis and your…"
"Dude! Let it go!" Dean shifted his leg so his thigh pressed up against Sam's. "And if you're not here for smiting, why the hell are you here?"
"Oh. Well, after Uriel's hatred of Humanity turned him against the armies of Heaven, orders came down that we were to get to know you better."
"Know us better?" As far as Dean was concerned, given what he'd walked in on, Castiel had gotten to know them a damned sight better than he was comfortable with.
"No, not you, specifically. We are to get to know Humanity better."
"Okay." Finally relaxing back against the headboard, Dean sighed. "So if you're not getting to know us specifically, why are you here."
"There was something I needed explained." Castiel frowned, head down as if he were searching for the right words.
Dean braced himself. Nothing like explaining Humanity to an angel while buck naked, having been interrupted while having sex with your brother.
"Why," Castiel began, looking up, "would the FOX network even consider cancelling The Sarah Connor Chronicles when there is about to be a major motion picture and millions of dollars of free publicity?"
"What?"
"Why would the FOX network…"
Dean waved him quiet. "I heard you," he growled. "I just didn't believe you. I am sitting here with…" Sam's hand closed around his arm, the pressure a warning, and yeah, maybe the phrase with lube dribbling out of my ass didn't need to be said. "Naked," he snarled instead. "Both of us are sitting here naked. When people are naked, you don't interrupt for anything less than the apocalypse. The actual apocalypse. Happening at that precise moment," he added when Castiel opened his mouth. "When people are naked, if it can wait, it should wait. You got that?"
"Yes. I understand, however, I still do not understand why…"
"Because they have shit for brains," Sam told him.
Castiel blinked one last time. "Oh," he said. And disappeared.
"You know he sucks at metaphor," Dean muttered. "He'll be back."
"But not while we're naked."
Dean reached down and scratched at where things were congealing. "Let's hope."
They sat quietly for a moment. Turned out there was nothing like an angel popping in with a crisis about popular culture to ruin the mood.
Finally Dean sighed and tossed his pillow onto the other bed. "Cheeseburger?"
Sam shrugged. "Why not."