Plunket on a Saturday night | Community, Mk. II

[tearoha]

This is part of a series organised over at The Blog Roll, in which a group (I hope!) of us (and by us, I mean we tentative earnest bloggers) write about the same thing. In theory. They don't know (heh, heh, villainous chuckle here) that I intend to just do my own take. All along, all I wanted to do was tell you guys about this. So this thing

Comments

[ext_1187820]

Yay for community and yelling at people indeed! That's an excellent way to put it :).

<3.

[tearoha]

XD I yell at people an awful lot less than I make out, but I do like people to be open to directness! It makes everything; relationshis, community, more honest.

[tiegirl]

My Mom always thought you should treat the people you love with the most courtesy, but it just isn't possible, you know? They're the ones you fight with! You know them the best. Courtesy, that's for strangers. :P

[tearoha]

:P Maybe it's not discourteous to yell? After all, if you do it right you're clearing the air and that's gotta be good... yeah? I don't think directness is necessarily rude. On the other hand, your Mom sounds fantastic.

[tiegirl]

Oh, my Mom was my best friend when I grew up. She had her issues, though, and one of them was the confrontation thing. But she was fun. We were all to do our own laundry as kids and it tended to pile up on the laundry floor and folding table, etc. She finally got fed up with it and took a magic marker and wrote ALL OVER THE WALL!

I AM TIRED!!! of having a huge mess down here! ETC ETC ETC

for about a 4 foot square area of white wall in the laundry room. Once we finished laughing we cleaned up and kinda kept it clean after that.

Hee hee.

[tearoha]

:D

I love your Mum.

My flatmate did the most non-confrontational confrontational thing like that. He came home and found the door had been left unlocked. And he wrote "HOUSE WAS LEFT OPEN AGAIN" all over the fridge in permanent marker.

Much the same!

[ext_1251186]

I love this - beautiful description of your Sunday night and I love your thoughts following - I totally agree that anger isn't a sign of something being broken, but in practice I still shy away from confrontations. Often I get angry inside but don't flare up - though sometimes I do if the issue is really important to me! (Equally, sometimes it may be important but I still don't come out with it...) I've experienced this difference (yelling vs. non-yelling) causing a lot of misunderstanding and pain - it's certainly a difference we need to be aware of!

[tearoha]

Thank you! I'm not as yelly as I sound, honest. I just, I like problems to be honestly, directly discussed. It's less hurtful that way in the long run :) Makes happy communities.

I'd be interested to see how many people have experieenced this kind of conflict in dealing-with-things - and how!

[tiegirl]

I couldn't agree more. I have a co-worker who used to be a very good friend who is a master of the sarcastic hit and run. Every time I try to engage her in any kind of discussion of differences, she zings me and then runs away, rolling her eyes.

Not very productive. And annoying as hell.

[tearoha]

She sounds scared of your debating skills to me!

[ext_1251186]

And, I LOVE that Madeline L'Engle quote!!

[tearoha]

Madeleine L'Engle gave me some of my first philosophising.

[ext_1254611]

Thoughts:

I'm also a non-yeller I think, except in the context of punk music :)

Beowulf is the author? I just learned a thing.

I love the tangibleness of your post.

[tearoha]

Beowulf as the author of... of Game of Thrones? *dies* PLEASE NO

Tangibility. It's a lovely thing, as well as rolling off the tongue.