without reason
friend!dooseung, mentioned!TOP/hyunseung, pg, angst
Doe eyes darkened by smeared black kohl stared blankly past the man before him. But he was used to that. The younger never paid that much attention to him in the past five years he’d known him; but he never complained about going out of his way to help the other when he needed it. That night was just going to be another one of those occasions. Having received a messily typed text message with only a location in the middle of the night, he didn’t need to guess why.
- - - -
At the opposite side of the room from the large window, artificial light emanated through the open door, casting contrasting shadows across Hyunseung’s face. I could see the faint goose bumps decorating the portion of skin exposed by the collar of his white v-neck under his tailored black blazer.
"Seungie-ah..." He appeared unsettled at the call of the nickname but when my knuckles brushed almost tenderly across a sharp cheekbone his features returned to a vacant mask. I rested the back of my hand against the smooth column of the younger’s neck and sighed. The skin was marred by the markings of his lover, who wasn’t anywhere to be seen, unsurprisingly. At the sight of those, I took a moment to drink in the rest of his jumbled appearance.
He was dressed in what I’d helped him select for the night but after the meeting with his lover before, the loose blonde waves framing his face were tousled and drooped, the once crisp ironed clothes were wrinkled and he was missing his left sock.
The hours he had spent sitting on the wide windowsill alone watching over the darkening room left the sad, melted version of what had been a Cape Cod beside him glistening as the dripping condensation outside the glass tumbler no doubt stained the polished mahogany without a coaster to protect it. The velveteen curtains were still drawn open, showing the sprawling, sparkling view of nighttime Seoul below. The thick glass did little to prevent the wintry chill from seeping into the room; the fact proven as I saw my breath visibly fanning from my mouth.
"How long have you been sitting here? You're freezing."
- - - -
In an instant, Hyunseung finally became aware that his limbs were numb from both the cold and not moving from his current position for so long. In another, he was suddenly drawn to the small amount of comfortable warmth offered by the elder’s hand that was still placed on his neck and curled his body absentmindedly toward him.
He let out a pleased hum when he’s wrapped in a warm embrace, his reaction unrepressed. There's a strained crack in the sound, he knows, and for the first time in a long time, he looks him in the eyes. There’s evident shock present for a scarce second as the other picks up on his inner conflict before his gaze flickers back to the dark wallpaper of the opposite wall.
The door was open; how long had he left it ajar, waiting for Doojoon to pick up what Seunghyun had left discarded? Though the thought of running away appealed to him greatly then, he stayed rooted in his spot, still not trusting his limbs to cooperate if he moved.
“Seunghyun left again, right?” Doojoon chuckled dryly. Pity was laced in his words, something he recognized with a small irritated sneer that’s soon directed at the man’s back as he walked to the door to close it.
Why had he asked him to come again?
- - - -
“You really don’t need to wear all of this, Hyunseung-ah,” I mentioned carelessly, removing the layer of foundation off his forehead. In response he simply hummed uncaringly as he let himself be taken care of.
In the en suite bathroom, I was seated in front of Hyunseung who I had situated straddled on the edge of the bathtub. The damp washcloth I wiped over his face revealed no visible change in the clear, milky complexion, which made me to mumble under my breath quietly on the subject of the unnecessary amount of MAC cosmetics slathered uselessly on. It was calm as I finished the task in the comfortable quiet between us. I moved on to the left side of his face after removing the smeared mess around his eyes, wrists strained from the awkward position but since it was the last bit to be cleaned I ignored the feeling and focused on finishing.
When Hyunseung pulled away unexpectedly with a pained whimper I was quick to grab the hand that tried to protectively cover his face. Taking a hold of his jaw silently before he was able to push me away, I wiped the tender spot again but took the care to be gentle. Underneath the foundation and concealer, a swollen flourish of maroon & deep purple discoloring covering the side of his face was revealed; a startling contrast from the surrounding pale skin.
Once again I was ignored when I shot a questioning stare at Hyunseung; it was the doorknob that captured his interest.
With a soft click of my tongue I leaned back and start the shower as I rose to my feet.
“I’m sure you can take of yourself from here, yeah?” He still didn’t look up at me but gave a short nod when he stripped off his blazer and placed it on top of the towel rack. I tossed the dirtied washcloth into the far corner of the countertop, turning on the faucet to wash my hands. A glance into the mirror stopped me, and I bit back a small noise as I watched Hyunseung’s reflection.
“That Seunghyun…”
- - - -
After hearing the door click shut, Hyunseung adjusted the water temperature to its highest setting, stepping under the flow of scalding water with a faint smile. The burn that relaxed his muscles faded as he ran his hand through his hair, letting the heat sink deep into his skin.
- - - -
Hyunseung’s toes pushed down into the carpet impatiently as I took off most of the covering of the bed, each splayed out as he rocked back on his heels while he watched me. The sheets were untouched when I had arrived, the pillows and throw decorating the ornate bed lying in perfect order while the couch across the room had been left all but destroyed sometime before Hyunseung had called me.
“You didn’t even use the bed?”
“Shut up Doojoon.”
- - - -
He laid awake, eyes boring holes through the lamp perched on the nightstand beside the bed. He was simply waiting patiently for sleep to take him; thoughts bringing him away from the plush mattress beneath him, the soft duvet covering, and the unfamiliar arms wrapped around him. Even some of the lights outside the window had been dimmed, the dark almost broken by the coming of dawn.
The familiar sharp buzz of his cell phone jerked him back to where he was; in the hotel room, on a bed that wasn’t his, in Doojoon’s arms.
Doojoon never stirred from his sleep as he slipped from his loose hold and padded across the carpet to the table where his things had been collected. The source of buzzing noise danced across the hard surface animatedly, screen flashing a familiar name. Quickly snatching it up and accepting the call, he didn’t even have to say a word before the gruff, disoriented voice of his boyfriend came over the line abruptly.
‘Yah, Hyunseung! Where are you? You better not be fucking some- ’
A smile played on his lips at the nagging words that rumbled through to him. Even as the call ended sharply after the final warning, he grinned contently to himself, already pulling on his clothes once again.
_______________________________
a/n: technically this is the original of 'drowning boy', my shinee fic, but whatever.
i'm just going to stop writing because this has hyunnie being hurt again *deadpan*
he's too perfect for my angst crap X(
Doe eyes darkened by smeared black kohl stared blankly past the man before him. But he was used to that. The younger never paid that much attention to him in the past five years he’d known him; but he never complained about going out of his way to help the other when he needed it. That night was just going to be another one of those occasions. Having received a messily typed text message with only a location in the middle of the night, he didn’t need to guess why.
- - - -
At the opposite side of the room from the large window, artificial light emanated through the open door, casting contrasting shadows across Hyunseung’s face. I could see the faint goose bumps decorating the portion of skin exposed by the collar of his white v-neck under his tailored black blazer.
"Seungie-ah..." He appeared unsettled at the call of the nickname but when my knuckles brushed almost tenderly across a sharp cheekbone his features returned to a vacant mask. I rested the back of my hand against the smooth column of the younger’s neck and sighed. The skin was marred by the markings of his lover, who wasn’t anywhere to be seen, unsurprisingly. At the sight of those, I took a moment to drink in the rest of his jumbled appearance.
He was dressed in what I’d helped him select for the night but after the meeting with his lover before, the loose blonde waves framing his face were tousled and drooped, the once crisp ironed clothes were wrinkled and he was missing his left sock.
The hours he had spent sitting on the wide windowsill alone watching over the darkening room left the sad, melted version of what had been a Cape Cod beside him glistening as the dripping condensation outside the glass tumbler no doubt stained the polished mahogany without a coaster to protect it. The velveteen curtains were still drawn open, showing the sprawling, sparkling view of nighttime Seoul below. The thick glass did little to prevent the wintry chill from seeping into the room; the fact proven as I saw my breath visibly fanning from my mouth.
"How long have you been sitting here? You're freezing."
- - - -
In an instant, Hyunseung finally became aware that his limbs were numb from both the cold and not moving from his current position for so long. In another, he was suddenly drawn to the small amount of comfortable warmth offered by the elder’s hand that was still placed on his neck and curled his body absentmindedly toward him.
He let out a pleased hum when he’s wrapped in a warm embrace, his reaction unrepressed. There's a strained crack in the sound, he knows, and for the first time in a long time, he looks him in the eyes. There’s evident shock present for a scarce second as the other picks up on his inner conflict before his gaze flickers back to the dark wallpaper of the opposite wall.
The door was open; how long had he left it ajar, waiting for Doojoon to pick up what Seunghyun had left discarded? Though the thought of running away appealed to him greatly then, he stayed rooted in his spot, still not trusting his limbs to cooperate if he moved.
“Seunghyun left again, right?” Doojoon chuckled dryly. Pity was laced in his words, something he recognized with a small irritated sneer that’s soon directed at the man’s back as he walked to the door to close it.
Why had he asked him to come again?
- - - -
“You really don’t need to wear all of this, Hyunseung-ah,” I mentioned carelessly, removing the layer of foundation off his forehead. In response he simply hummed uncaringly as he let himself be taken care of.
In the en suite bathroom, I was seated in front of Hyunseung who I had situated straddled on the edge of the bathtub. The damp washcloth I wiped over his face revealed no visible change in the clear, milky complexion, which made me to mumble under my breath quietly on the subject of the unnecessary amount of MAC cosmetics slathered uselessly on. It was calm as I finished the task in the comfortable quiet between us. I moved on to the left side of his face after removing the smeared mess around his eyes, wrists strained from the awkward position but since it was the last bit to be cleaned I ignored the feeling and focused on finishing.
When Hyunseung pulled away unexpectedly with a pained whimper I was quick to grab the hand that tried to protectively cover his face. Taking a hold of his jaw silently before he was able to push me away, I wiped the tender spot again but took the care to be gentle. Underneath the foundation and concealer, a swollen flourish of maroon & deep purple discoloring covering the side of his face was revealed; a startling contrast from the surrounding pale skin.
Once again I was ignored when I shot a questioning stare at Hyunseung; it was the doorknob that captured his interest.
With a soft click of my tongue I leaned back and start the shower as I rose to my feet.
“I’m sure you can take of yourself from here, yeah?” He still didn’t look up at me but gave a short nod when he stripped off his blazer and placed it on top of the towel rack. I tossed the dirtied washcloth into the far corner of the countertop, turning on the faucet to wash my hands. A glance into the mirror stopped me, and I bit back a small noise as I watched Hyunseung’s reflection.
“That Seunghyun…”
- - - -
After hearing the door click shut, Hyunseung adjusted the water temperature to its highest setting, stepping under the flow of scalding water with a faint smile. The burn that relaxed his muscles faded as he ran his hand through his hair, letting the heat sink deep into his skin.
- - - -
Hyunseung’s toes pushed down into the carpet impatiently as I took off most of the covering of the bed, each splayed out as he rocked back on his heels while he watched me. The sheets were untouched when I had arrived, the pillows and throw decorating the ornate bed lying in perfect order while the couch across the room had been left all but destroyed sometime before Hyunseung had called me.
“You didn’t even use the bed?”
“Shut up Doojoon.”
- - - -
He laid awake, eyes boring holes through the lamp perched on the nightstand beside the bed. He was simply waiting patiently for sleep to take him; thoughts bringing him away from the plush mattress beneath him, the soft duvet covering, and the unfamiliar arms wrapped around him. Even some of the lights outside the window had been dimmed, the dark almost broken by the coming of dawn.
The familiar sharp buzz of his cell phone jerked him back to where he was; in the hotel room, on a bed that wasn’t his, in Doojoon’s arms.
Doojoon never stirred from his sleep as he slipped from his loose hold and padded across the carpet to the table where his things had been collected. The source of buzzing noise danced across the hard surface animatedly, screen flashing a familiar name. Quickly snatching it up and accepting the call, he didn’t even have to say a word before the gruff, disoriented voice of his boyfriend came over the line abruptly.
‘Yah, Hyunseung! Where are you? You better not be fucking some- ’
A smile played on his lips at the nagging words that rumbled through to him. Even as the call ended sharply after the final warning, he grinned contently to himself, already pulling on his clothes once again.
_______________________________
a/n: technically this is the original of 'drowning boy', my shinee fic, but whatever.
i'm just going to stop writing because this has hyunnie being hurt again *deadpan*
he's too perfect for my angst crap X(