College Essays can Suck my Dick

[teenslave017]

I am so fucking tired of college essays and how Mrs. Elliott keeps bugging me to make them funny, but my humor is satanic, to be frank, and I don't want to give an admissions lady a heart attack, presuming that she is going to let me in. I can make my essays clever and original, but I can't get funny. It's beginning to piss me off

Comments

[enamored]

hahaha you cant write a funny college essay and I can. HAHA

[teenslave017]

No, I CAN write a hilarious college essay, but it wont get me into any college with moral values.

[teenslave017]

Jen, what should I say happens to me on my first day of school?

[sofa_king_funny]

The first day of college is kind of that feeling you get when you just did something really funny and exciting and you're like:

"WOOO!!! WOOOOO!! OOOYEA!!! YEAAAA!!!!!.....WOO!!!YEA!!.... WOOO! ....

Heh.... WOOO! Yeaaa!.... Woooooooo!.....ya."

And then you realize in college you have to go to classes too.

Everyone gets all moved in, and theres a MILLION people running around, and you meet your roomate and move in with this TOTAL stranger who collects toenails for all you know...and you meet 80 different people and you hate at least 3 of them right off the spot. And then you look around the HUGE campus and you have NO IDEA how to get anywhere and you look like a dork with a map of the campus, and THEN... you have to sleep in the same room as this new stranger you just met...

"wwwwooooooooo.....ya."

[sofa_king_funny]

Thats the FIRST day. The SECOND day is when everyone says: "Aww Fuck it, let's go PARTY AND DRINK AND TOGGAAA!!" Thatll be your second college essay.

[sofa_king_funny]

PS- Miss Elliot WANTS you to write a funny satanic college essay because SHE is satanic, and would get immense pleasure from reading them and then watching you get kicked out of COLLEGE for writing them.