Interview meme
Interview questions from Telynor (7th June 2003)
1. When did you first realize you were a dominant?
It was a gradual process. My first experience of being dominant was when I was, aged 17, invited to a BDSM party. I agreed to go to look after a girl I was fond of, but not in a sexual way. But she wanted to explore, and I found myself responding to her.. not to her sexuality, but to the submission she gradually offered me as we explored. It felt quite uncomfortable in a way, because the D/s dynamic that grew between us was very much at odds with the very physical play that others were apparantly exploring.
Dominance has been part of all my relationships since, one way or another, not always comfortably. But I think I only used the word to refer to myself in a way I felt entirely comfortable with in the last few years - I guess I learned my BDSM vocabulary on Isle of Shadows.
2. What's your favorite nut?
For cooking, peanuts, used to make a satay sauce - but "a peanut's not a nut, it's a legume" (5 points for anyone who can identify the (mis)quote). In ice-cream, macademia nuts. In chocolate, hazelnuts, in the form of a really good praline or gianduja. On desserts, caramelised pecans. Loose, or in salads, walnuts.
3. Sex, or a good book?
Different foods for different moods. If I'm feeling physical, sex. If cerebral, the book. But why choose.. Read a nice book, share stories, discuss, snuggle, fuck.. :)
4. Why are all the good dominants taken?
Because all the good submissives got there first? :) Actually, in my experience, it's usually because a really good dominant has grown into that, grown with a partner, who they are almost certainly still with. If you're one of the before-mentioned good submissives, maybe you need to look for a potentially good dominant, who knows they have a lot to learn, and is willing to learn and grow with you.
5. Quick: Give me three uses for toothpaste.
Cleaning teeth, removing tiny scratches from glass (watches, PDA screens, etc), and torturing men (never tried that one on a woman!)
Interview questions from Nym (15th June 2003)
1) Pick one. Enough money that you'd never have to work again, or your perfect mate.
That's an easy choice. I think I already have my perfect mate, and I couldn't bear to lose that. Also, I like working, I just want to do something slightly different to what I'm doing now. As to money, I could live without that.
So, it would have to be my perfect mate.
2) Describe a perfect day.
You'd get a different answer each time you asked me that. Right now, it would begin with waking with ruine_ in some warm, snuggly, sexy way. Then she'd say, "I've got a surprise. We're going sailing". And we would. Step outside, short walk to a yacht, and spend the whole day learning how to sail. Then in the evening, we'd snuggle up in a cozy corner in a coffee bar, and watch the cute students wander past. We'd talk about whether we'd like to catch one of them to take home with us, but we wouldn't actually do it.. Just drift home together, crawl into bed, and do snuggly, warm, sexy things all night.
3) If you could spend an hour in my company, what would you want to do? :)
Hey, I remember asking you that, must be three years ago now! :) It's a good question though, but usually gets more mundane answers than you'd expect.
I can imagine spending only an hour with you. Perhaps I'm flying in to your local airport, then getting a connecting flight out again. With only a little time between the flights, I can only spend an hour with you. We could go anywhere, do anything, in that hour if we wanted to, though. But I know what I'd want to do. Get out of the airport, find somewhere sunny, outdoors. Sit in the shade of a tree. Snuggle, and talk. I can think of lots of other things I'd love to do with you, but if there's only an hour, that's what's most important?
What, did you expect something kinky? Not in an hour.
4) Are you a sadist? A dominant? What do you see as the difference between the two?
Dominant. For me, the difference is that I need, crave, the emotional connection. The power-play, on a deep emotional level. Without a deep emotional connection, which always ends up in a D/s power-dynamic for me one way or another, physical play and sex both feel empty to the point that they can make me feel nauseous. With the emotional connection, when my partner flies, I fly with them.
5) You are presented with a perfectly spankable ass. What do you use on it?
My hand. I'm a minimalist, really. Using my hand lets me feel skin and muscle response, feel the glow in my hand, gives me much better control, and there is a particularly special significance in having someone bent over your knee, spanking them with a bare hand.
"If you want me to interview you--post a comment that simply says, "Interview me." I'll respond with questions for you to take back to your own journal and answer as a post. Of course, they'll be different for each person since this is an interview and not a general survey. At the bottom of your post, after answering the Interviewer's questions, you ask if anyone wants to be interviewed. So it becomes your turn-- in the comments, you ask them any questions you have for them to take back to their journals and answer. And so it becomes the circle."